“I’m not like Leilani,” she said with a quiet confidence.
“No. You are nothing like Leilani.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m not making comparisons of that nature. I just mean that it’s all muddy between us because of Kalem.”
“I wasn’t making comparisons of that nature, either, he promised.
“I’m not just a mistress.”
“No.” He rubbed his chin. “An idea occurred to me this afternoon.” He took one step and brought his body close to hers. His legs straddled hers; his body engulfed her with its masculine strength. “One that I think we should … consider.”
“I’m all ears.”
“No. You are far more than ears.” He lifted a finger and flicked her lobe teasingly. Keeping up with his mood shifts was giving her vertigo. “I am expected to marry. It is a duty and obligation that I have always felt.”
She held her breath, hating where this was going and yet unable to turn away for the morbid curiosity throbbing through her.
Her hair glowed like fire. Her hair had been the first thing he’d noticed, when they’d met. “What if you were to be my wife?”
The world was spinning far, far too fast. Evie lifted a hand and clutched the fabric of his robe for strength. “What did you just say?”
“I think we should marry.” He shrugged his broad shoulders as though he was asking her to share a pot of tea with him.
“But … why? We’re not in love.”
His face was impossible to read. “No. We’re not. But we are sexually compatible. We share a nephew. And we have both experienced a loss that would be difficult for anyone else to understand. Do you not feel this bonds us?”
Sadness choked her heart. “These are reasons for us to be friends. Not to get married.”
His smile was slightly mocking. “As my wife, you will have greater freedoms in the palace. The ability to lunch which whomever you wish. To speak to my guests as my equal. I would never again have to turn my back on you.”
“You shouldn’t have done that anyway.” Her expression flashed angrily.
“This is a country of traditions and obligations. Even Sabra knew that.”
“Yeah, and she ran as far as she could from them.” If Evie were less angry, she might have apologised for the unnecessary cruelty of the comment.
“Yes. But you cannot.”
She opened her mouth to protest and he swore softly.
Sabra’s ill-thought-out will played heavily on his mind. If Evie knew that she had the legal right to take Kalem, he would lose them both forever. It added extra determination to his argument. “Not if you want to live with Kalem. He is staying here, in Ishala, to be raised amongst our people.”
“So he can become just as set in his ways as you are?”
He compressed his lips with impatience. “Our ways are not bad. Sabra was happy here.” His eyes were dark, stormed by feeling. “And you will be too. But more so if you marry me.”
“That’s absolutely crazy.”
“Why? We are already sleeping together. There is only benefit to you in this arrangement. You will have greater privileges, respect, wealth, and our personal situation needn’t change.”
That was, of course, in a nutshell what Evie feared. Marriage to a man like Malakhi, without the warmth of affection, could prove soul-destroying.
“So it wouldn’t matter to you that I don’t particularly like you? So long as we continued to sleep together.”
He contemplated her appraisal of their situation carefully, analysing all edges of the summation. Finally, he nodded.
Evie must have lost her mind because something about his proposition was making a crazy kind of sense. “Can I think about it?”
He rubbed a hand across his chin. “Yes. And while you do, I want to show you something.”
“What?”
“Patience, Jamila. You will see soon enough.”
Eight
He drove fast but with a skill she could only admire. They’d left the city behind them an hour ago, and for a small time they’d tracked alongside the ocean, until Malakhi had turned the car sharply off the road and veered into the desert. Sand spread on either side as far as the eye could see.
“Do you actually know where we’re going?”
Dusk engulfed them; the sky out here, away from civilisation was a patchwork of streaking colours. Apricot, violet, gunmetal grey and dotted through the swathes of beauty were twinkling diamond-like stars. The sand was white, even at dusk, and its hard line was broken occasionally by a softening dune. Even more occasionally by a tree; surprisingly similar to the Australian Gum trees in shape, with solid trunks and wide-spreading branches covered in peeling leaves.
She ran a hand over her shoulder, wincing a little as it twinged.
“Are you hurt?” He asked, missing nothing.
She waved her hand carelessly. “I’m fine. Just a sore neck.”
He frowned, as if she’d said she thought she might be about to die.
“I’m fine,” she reassured him. “I carried Kalem around all morning and he’s a heavy little brick these days.”
A sand dune crested into sight and he slowed the vehicle, his eyes intent on the horizon. Night was falling now. The moon was vivid in the sky, as though a glob of pearlescent paint had been flicked against a block of charcoal.
The car drew closer, and other shapes began to appear. Edges, like walls and roofs. Fascinated, she leaned closer, her eyes skirting the unusual buildings with unbridled curiosity.
“What is this?”
“This?” His smile held no pleasure. “This is one of our most ancient and sacred sites.” He cut the engine and pushed his door open. “Come. Let me show you.”
The softness of the sand surprised her when she stepped out of the car. Her feet were swallowed by it, and she would most certainly have lost her balance altogether if Malakhi hadn’t reached out to steady her.
“You get used to it,” he murmured, stepping back easily yet keeping an arm on her back.
She made no response. The buildings were crumbling in large patches, but this added to their beauty. After a while, her feet were on firmer ground. Gradually, the sand gave way for ancient paving, misshapen and uneven. She crouched down to run her hands over it, a tingle dancing along her nervous system as she imagined the hands that had laid these bricks, one by one, many years ago.
“This was the central market,” he murmured, drawing her attention to an open space ahead. Buildings crowded it on each side, and though one had lost its face altogether, the others showed circular windows overlooking the square.
A sole tree stood, long ago denuded of greenery, in the very centre. It was sinister looking, with its gnarled branches blackened by death and age, its shape a taunt to the night sky. A bird made a loud sound from the top of the branches and Evie’s eyes flew to it.
“Khadir,” he murmured.
Her sidelong glance was wry. “Should I be afraid?”
His smile sent a thousand butterflies beating their wings inside her stomach. “Only if you plan to threaten me.”
She lifted her brow with mock consideration and then shrugged. “This place is in the middle of nowhere. Seems like a strange place to set up a town.”
“Two thousand years ago, when this village was inhabited, the country only spanned a little further. It was the turn of the first millennia when we claimed the small ocean principality to the far north.”
When he linked his fingers with hers, it felt unsettlingly natural. “This is one of the best spots. You don’t mind stairs do you?” He pulled her behind him into a narrow doorway. She gasped as they entered, for this building housed furniture.
“Oh, Mal.” And she was so caught up in the strange sense of slipping through the cracks of time that she didn’t notice she’d used Sabra’s name for him. He was so captivated by her obvious sense of wonder that he didn’t either. “Look. A kitchen.” She pointed to a rudimentary bench with a large timber bowl and va
rious crockery flagons and plates. “How is it possible this is preserved in this manner?”
“It is part of my land,” he said. “It is protected.”
“By Khadir,” she said with a grin, remembering the first time they’d met, when he’d told her that the bird accompanied him on trips into the desert.
“Him, yes. And also my military,” he winked. Still holding her hand, he tugged her gently behind him, leading to a staircase. It was narrow; the walls seemed to be leaning in on each other and each step had a depression in its centre testifying to years of use.
There must have been almost a hundred steps. At each landing a small window showed a glimpse of the town. She paused after they’d taken six flights and stared down through one of the windows.
“Not yet,” he pulled at her hand, his smile teasing. “Don’t spoil the surprise.”
When he pushed a heavy timber door outwards she saw exactly what he meant. Here, on the roof of the building, the town sprawled in all directions. And far in the distance she could see the glow of lights that came from the principal city, near the palace. In fact, she squinted into the distance and nodded. “That’s the palace?”
“Yes.” He propped casually against the balustrade.
“This is so beautiful.”
“I’m glad you think so.”
“How come I never heard of it?”
His smile was tinged by sadness. “I’m almost certain you have.”
At her look of inquiry he pushed up from where he stood and came to link his arms behind her waist. His eyes scanned hers thoughtfully. “These are the Ruins of Fash’allam.”
For the second time that evening, she might have faltered in her stance had he not been there to support her. “Dave talked about this place,” she whispered, her eyes shimmering. “He said they were the most beautiful ruins he’d ever seen.”
Malakhi tightened his grip around her back but released one arm, pointing a little way across the desert. “That’s where it happened. The crash. The helicopter went down just there.”
She dragged in a breath, following his gaze. There was nothing to show for it.
“The wreckage has been cleared. But I know exactly where it was. Twenty seven of my paces from the corner of the town.” He pressed a finger beneath her chin, lifting her face to his. “Do not think, Evelyn, that I do not miss them. That I do not think of them. That I do not mourn their loss.”
Her enormous eyes skimmed his face, trying to understand what point he was making.
“You said Fayaz understands you,” he said, his voice so low that she almost didn’t catch it. “I have not been encouraged to speak of my heart, but this doesn’t mean I don’t have one.” He cleared his throat. “I think of her every day.”
Tears shimmered on her lashes. “I’m so sorry.”
“Why should you be sorry, Jamila?”
She shook her head slowly. “I never thought you … you seem so … I thought I was the only one.”
His smile was uneven. “You aren’t.”
Her heart was hammering against her chest. To have thought him unfeeling and still been falling in love with him was one thing. But to know the depth of his feelings? How could she not recognise her own? Her own love? For why else would she have fallen to his bed despite the way he’d bullied her there? Why else would she have ended her marriage to Nick, because of one kiss with this man?
She spun a little, angling her body to look out over the town. “He loved this place. Why does that comfort me? To think of it being the last thing he saw?”
An air of kinship was spreading around them; they were survivors of the same war. “They were holding hands.”
“Who?”
“Sabra and Dave. That’s how they were found. Hands held. Even in death, they were in love.”
“Stop.” She closed her eyes, and now her body was wracked with sobs. “I can’t think of it.” She turned again, burying her head against his chest. “They should still be here. This is all so pointless. So stupid. How can they be gone? I close my eyes and I see them; I hear them.” Her voice was contorted by her sadness. “I look at Kalem and I see them both.”
“As do I.” He rubbed his hands over her back slowly and for the first time Evie got a sense that the reason Malakhi had fought so hard to keep Kalem in Ishala wasn’t because he was the heir to the throne, so much as the last physical piece of his sister that he held.
Evie’s tears fell unchecked. She had grieved so much since they had died, but held in his arms and finally letting herself feel these emotions freely was the first time she’d had a sense of healing coming over her. A sense of weary acceptance.
“She had a dream, you know.” Her words were just a whisper in the night.
“A dream?” He prompted, his hand still on her back.
She nodded. “She wouldn’t speak about it. Dave said she thought that would give the dream life. But I know it unnerved her. She was scared about coming here. That something bad would happen.”
Malakhi’s body was flooded with emotion. It suggested, perhaps, the reasons she’d made those changes to their legal situation. Nominating Evie as guardian of Kalem could be explained by a belief that something bad was poised to occur. “I didn’t know this.”
“No. I mean, it was just a dream. She probably put it out of her head as soon as she got to the airport.”
Malakhi doubted that. He’d seen the way Sabra had of obsessing over her signs and superstitions. “Her dreams …”
Evie held her breath. What? What about her dreams?
“Even as a child, they were so vivid.” He kissed the top of Evie’s head, dismissing the voice in his head that was telling him something was wrong – that he was wrong. He’d made his choice, and he was sticking to it. “She convinced herself they were prophetic.”
“Well, in this instance, she appears to have been right.”
He sighed. “I doubt that.”
The night was a blanket, shrouding them in its magical darkness. It breathed in and out, sighing their sadness alongside them. “I think about the nights,” she said after a long time had passed.
“What about them?”
“I think about how many nights there have been since the dawning of time. How many deaths it has witnessed, how many births. How many wars and fights and lovers and lovers estranged – and it comforts me.” She drew in a kiss of that very night. “Our lives matter. We have an imperative to make them good; to make good choices. But there is a much larger background to consider: humanity renders us all reasonably insignificant.” A smile tingled on her lips. “Even someone like you, with a bit of a God-complex, is still just a man.”
She felt his answering smile and she could picture the grin on his handsome features, but she didn’t want to lift her face from the comforting closeness of his chest. Just like the first day they’d met, she felt the beating of his heart and it spoke to her.
“I thought your brother was the historian,” he said after a minute had passed, allowing her words to evaporate and their odd sense to weaken.
“I almost followed him into it,” she said quietly, running her hand over the edge of the balustrade. “We both loved reflecting on the past.”
“Why did you not?”
“Because I loved cooking more.” She tilted her head up to his. “It must be hard for you to imagine having such choices.”
The only choice he’d found hard was this one: marrying her to secure his heir, and not telling her the truth. “Oh?”
“Your destiny was marked at the moment of your birth. But if it hadn’t been, what would you have done? Would you have flirted with history, as I did? Or become a scientist? Would you have written books?”
He laughed. “Perhaps my destiny was marked for me, but thank God for that. There is nothing I should have liked more than being ruler of this great land. And imagine the cruelty of being born with that desire and no ability to attain it.” He smiled at her. “I have never wished to be anywhere other than here.
”
Her heart turned over in her chest. Whisperings of love filled her soul. Beneath the stars, with the moon beaming across them, she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that her love was true and real.
“I want to do that with you.”
A frown tugged at the corner of his lips. “Meaning?”
“I think we should get married. I think you’re right.”
He was very quiet; had he changed his mind? Nervously, she continued: “I mean, we are the only family Kalem has left. Don’t you think Sabra and Dave would have wanted us to raise him together? To give him what they did? To surround him with love, and to remind him of who they were?”
He nodded. “Yes. This is exactly what I feel.”
And though it was hardly a marriage of love on his part, her smile was enormous. “Okay. Let’s do it then.”
And amid the Ruins of Fash’allam, surrounded by whispers of past love, of millennia of stories and lives, they cast a notch in theirs.
For they would marry: and soon.
* * *
When Evie woke, a smile on her lips, she wondered if it had all been a dream. She lifted up off the pillows slowly, her eyes adjusting to the morning’s light. Only it wasn’t that weak, watery dawning of day she’d become used to seeing. It was bright, and very, very hot. She straightened, her eyes scanning the room for Malakhi.
His side of the bed was empty; and it was no longer warm.
With a frown, she pushed her thick hair from her eyes and squinted at the clock.
Ten o’clock!
Shock had her leaping from the bed. She hadn’t slept that late since the first week of her apprenticeship, when she’d felt as though she’d been hit by a truck owing to the late hours and physical nature of the job.
A knock sounded at the door and she turned towards it in confusion. That’s what had woken her! She’d been in such a deep sleep and suddenly there’d been a sound.
She grabbed a pale blue robe from the end of the bed and wrapped it around her slender frame before pulling it inwards.
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