Ellen nudged Joyce, who stood up and cleared her throat. “Ellen and I have the dubious honor of providing you with something borrowed, but it will have to wait until right before you walk down the aisle, Vicky.” Joyce took Ellen’s hand in hers and laid her ring finger next to it. “We’d like you to carry our wedding bands with you as a symbol of borrowed happiness. Uh, the reason you have to wait until the very last possible second before the march is, well, it’s because I get the jitters if I don’t see my ring on my hand. I’ll just have to pretend I’m in surgery with rubber gloves on, during the ceremony.” Everyone laughed and Vicky clapped her hands together, more joyful tears in her eyes. She walked over to Joyce and kissed her on the cheek. Joyce was about to say something incorrigible, when Ellen stopped her with a hand to her back, and then accepted Vicky’s outstretched arms.
Jerry stood up and pulled Yvonne beside him, “Yvonne told me that you would spend the evening crying, Vicky, and I didn’t believe her.” Vicky blushed as everyone else chuckled. “She also told me that you would need this, something blue.” Jerry pulled out an oblong box and removed the lid. Inside was a royal blue linen hand-embroidered handkerchief, with appliqué flowers surrounding an oval, with two interlocking wedding rings inside it. The border consisted of filigree lace encompassed by 22 white roses. Vicky grabbed a tissue from her purse and wiped away her tears. The evening had been so perfect that if it weren’t for her wedding tomorrow, she’d be happy if the night never ended.
But it did have to end, and she was becoming anxious, because she could feel that Aidan was nervous. She thought she knew why, but hoped she was wrong. After their session with Dr. Kline earlier, Aidan was more ascetic in that they barely held hands, and when they did, there was no passion to it. When they kissed, there was no desire in it. It was as if Aidan was deliberately denying herself whatever would give her pleasure. This time though, it wasn’t because Aidan was blaming herself. This time it was Aidan’s fear of triggering another flashback episode in Vicky. But it was the eve of their wedding and Vicky wasn’t about to let flashbacks that Harold was ultimately responsible for, ruin her wedding or her honeymoon.
After the dinner party ended, Aidan and Vicky went back to their apartment so Vicky could pack a few things for the hotel. Vicky wasn’t stringent about traditions of a wedding, but there was one ritual she insisted on following, and that was not allowing Aidan to see her before the wedding. It wasn’t just the good luck myth, which was a big part of it, because it was luck that brought Aidan back to her after so many years. When Dr. Kline sent an Army representative to her office to request she hire a wounded veteran, who was suffering from amnesia, she never dreamed that vet would be Aidan. And now her she was, about to marry her childhood sweetheart, after so much yearning, and strife.
Another reason Vicky wanted Aidan to wait until the wedding to see her, was because of the anticipation of seeing Aidan’s face when Aidan looked at her for the first time in her wedding dress, walking down the aisle. There would only be that one chance to see that kind of pure unadulterated pride, lust, and love in Aidan’s eyes, and Vicky thought that alone would be worth spending the night apart.
Aidan walked over to the bedside table, and removed her new watch from her wrist, and admired how handsome it looked as she laid it down. She pulled off her pistol and holster, and laid them inside the drawer, along with her badge. Her cell phone she laid on top of the table incase Vicky should call her in the middle of the night with a change of heart.
Vicky was busy packing a few things she would need for the night, like her pajamas, and things she’d need for her wedding day, like her makeup.
“Sweetheart,” Vicky called from the bathroom, “I asked Joyce to pick me up in two hours, all right?”
“Do I have a choice?” Aidan asked.
Laughing as she walked back into the bedroom, stuffing her hair brush in her bag, Vicky replied, “No, not this time. Just humor me on this one, okay?”
“You know I don’t like waking up to an empty bed.” Aidan pouted playfully.
“Believe me, I don’t either, sweetheart.” Vicky began to undress, kicking off her pumps, and unzipping her jeans, “Let me make it up to you,” she cooed, as she unbuttoned her blouse and let it slip from her shoulders, exposing her bare creamy breasts. “I want to make sure that you get a good night’s sleep, so…” Vicky wiggled out of her jeans and stood before Aidan wearing only her lace see-through panties, and those she took off slowly, deliberately.
Even though Aidan understood from their session with Dr. Kline that Vicky’s flashback was not her fault, she was still hesitant. She had faced gunfire in Iraq which did not frighten her as much as facing Vicky at that moment. She wanted desperately to take Vicky, right there and then, but she held back, holding her hands at her side. She was already wet from the sweet torture of Vicky’s soft breasts, jiggling purposefully at her, but still she stood there, petrified that she might trigger an episode that would cause Vicky to flashback to her nightmare. Aidan would rather die than see that look of horror on Vicky’s face again.
Vicky sensed the hesitation in her lover and slowly, methodically, she began to unbuttoned Aidan’s shirt. Aidan watched her, happy she was relieved of the responsibility just this once. She preferred to be the giver, but her uncertainty prevented her from it this time. She had never been one to shy away from getting back up on that horse when she had fallen off, but Aidan had never had this kind of fall before and now that horse seemed enormous. For Vicky’s sake, she would let her make all the moves, that way she knew Vicky would be safe. At least, she hoped she would be.
Vicky walked behind Aidan and slowly pulled down her shirt, running her hands across Aidan’s muscular back as she did, smiling when her touch elicited a quick breath from Aidan. It was Vicky’s intention to show Aidan that touching was still a good thing, and making love was still as pleasurable, and that they can do both without fear of her flashbacks. Her thought was to start their lovemaking and then let Aidan’s natural instincts take over in hopes that things would return to the way they were, free and uninhibited.
Vicky began trailing kisses down Aidan’s back, as she wrapped her arms around her stomach and unzipped her jeans, sliding them down with her hands, skimming her fingers down Aidan’s long legs. Then Vicky slid her hands inside Aidan’s boxer shorts and pushed them down, caressing her thighs and crotch as she did. Aidan tried hard not to feel anything, but the sensation went straight to her clit and she let out an audible gasp.
“Honey, I need you, I need you so much,” Vicky whispered as she walked back in front of her lover, “Please, don’t fight it?” she shifted her leg between Aidan’s legs, slicking her skin with Aidan’s moisture, “I can feel your need, and I know you want me too.”
“Of course I want you. I want you so bad I could explode right now. It’s just that…,” Aidan looked deep into Vicky’s eyes and her resolved melted in the lava pit between her thighs, “Oh God, I want you so bad. You’ll tell me if I…, if…?”
“I’ll tell you,” Vicky whispered as she leaned in for a gentle probing kiss.
Aidan was timid at first, but finally she closed her eyes and kissed Vicky back, which was barely a peck on the lips. Vicky was far from satisfied, and this time she captured Aidan’s lips possessively, pressing hard into them until Aidan’s smoldering lips pressed back. Vicky took a step back and waited, hoping Aidan would respond, and silently relieved when she did.
Aidan began to undress Vicky feverishly, and soon both of them were nude, facing each other as vulnerable as new born virgins. When Aidan didn’t make the next logical move, Vicky sought to encourage her.
“Please honey, I need you to touch me.” Vicky ran her hand over her own breast hoping to entice Aidan to respond. And she did. The lustful look on Aidan’s face, and the way she nervously didn’t know what to do with her hands, emboldened Vicky to continued running her hands over her body, generating so much heat that Aidan could feel it, even across the space that
separated them. Aidan couldn’t control the stimuli her body was feeling any longer, and she grabbed Vicky’s hands and moved them away.
“That’s my job,” she grunted, and with quivering hands, she caressed Vicky’s breasts hungrily, putting all her focus on them as she massaged one, and then the other, into hard mounds of aching flesh that had Vicky arching her back into Aidan’s fevered hands.
“Oh yes it is,” Vicky moaned with excitement, “Oh God that feels so good,” Vicky wasn’t really much of a talker during sex, but she was making a conscious effort to reassure her lover that what she was doing was safe and very satisfying.
The fear in Aidan began to slowly dissipate, thanks to the lustful support of her lover. She leaned in and nibbled on Vicky’s ear lobe, before kissing her way down Vicky’s throat to the area between her breasts. Vicky lifted Aidan’s head up and smiled at her. Then she went to the bed and stretched across it in a provocative pose, hoping that Aidan would follow her. But when Aidan wavered, Vicky parted her legs and ran her hand down to her clitoris, arching her back at the sudden sensation. Vicky’s masturbating stirred the possessive fire in Aidan’s belly again, and she lay down beside her lover, though she was careful not to climb on top of her. She ran her hand up Vicky’s thigh and while Vicky stimulated her clit, Aidan aroused her vagina. The response was immediate and guttural, and quickened Aidan’s heart.
“Oh yes! That’s it honey, touch me there. Harder!” While Vicky grabbed at the bed sheets, she urged Aidan on, even while she was willing herself to hold back her orgasm, to make it last longer in order to give Aidan more time. More time to become her old self again.
“Don’t hold back on me, baby, I need you to come for me.” Aidan’s own excitement spread like a wild fire inside her, but she ignored it because what she needed most was Vicky’s release.
She watched Vicky’s face expressed every sensation she was feeling, and she was grateful she could put those expressions on her lover’s face. It reinvigorated Aidan enough, that when Vicky’s climax ended, Aidan immediately began stimulating her again before she could even catch her breath. It was important to her that this time she took the lead, this time she alone would bring Vicky to the pinnacle.
Vicky had just enough time to feel relieved that her ploy had worked, that Aidan had overcome her anxious reservations, before Aidan had her once again at the apex, and all conscious thoughts disappeared. She let out a climaxing giggle and slumped back to the bed, gasping at each tingle that rippled through her body.
Aidan was still holding back, though it was becoming harder, the more her body responded to Vicky’s climax. She knew she probably would never be able to fully let go again, but that was okay so long as she met the physical and emotional needs of her lover.
Although Vicky was enjoying her lover’s touch, she felt something was missing, and then realized that Aidan wasn’t on top of her, something that was instinctive, even lascivious for the both of them. She loved the feel of her lover’s skin touching hers, the weight of her body pressing against her. Vicky decided to try and force the issue. She grabbed Aidan and rolled on top of her, kissing her deeply as she went, effectively changing Aidan from the giver to the receiver. Though Aidan loved being the receiver as well, it was not what she wanted this time. Every fiber in her body was telling her to be the one who gave the gift of love, so she rolled Vicky back over and lay on top of her, caressing her, kissing her.
“That’s it, Aidan, that’s what I want,” Vicky said with a husky voice as she wrapped her arms around Aidan’s neck, locking her in place, “Make love to me slowly this time, darling,” she encouraged and Aidan complied, kissing and caressing her breasts until they were hot under her touch, until the hard tips peaked with anticipation, “Oh yes,” Vicky groaned in a stupor, “more like that, sweetheart.”
Aidan happily gave in to Vicky’s request, and even gave in to her own needs to possess those breasts. But Aidan had to check one more time before she would allow herself to give to her completely.
“Are you sure?” She asked as her fingers walked their way down to Vicky’s crotch, “I’m not too heavy, to suffocating, am I?”
“Oh God, yes, I mean no, oh shit, please hurry!”
Vicky was very close to climaxing again and just needed that tantalizing last push to release it, and knowing this, Aidan grinned with new found confidence, and kissing her fingers first, thrust Vicky into ecstasy.
***
The morning before the wedding…
“Mr. Cassidy?”
“Yeah, who wants to know?”
“My name is Dr. Richard Kline. I’m a psychiatrist and I’m here on behalf of your daughter, Aidan Cassidy.”
Dr. Kline and Harold Cassidy sat across from each other with only a metal table between them. They were in a small room at the county jail, where wall to wall windows lined the drab white concrete walls. Outside of the room stood correction officer’s watching, listening. Kline evaluated Harold’s physical appearance, making a mental note of his height, weight, the way he carried himself, even his beady eyes and large hands. He could visualize what Vicky must have seen when Harold raped her at age thirteen.
“So, you dressed up just to come see me?” Harold was referring to the Armani black suit Kline was wearing. He would be going straight to the wedding right after his visit with Harold and he didn’t want to have to change clothes.
“Actually, I’m on my way to your daughter’s wedding today.”
It didn’t take much for Harold’s sarcastic temper to ignite, “That dyke? Who the hell would marry her?”
“You don’t care much for your daughter, do you? Why is that Mr. Cassidy? Did she do something to you that caused you to hate her?”
“She did. She made me hate her.”
“How? What could she have done to make you hate her so much?”
“She was born!”
“That’s not really a good excuse. Perhaps it was her mother that you hated. Was it because she was Irish?”
Harold looked at him intensely, as if he were deciding how to best play his little game. A game that he had been playing since before Aidan had been born. It was as ingrained into his life as breathing was, and though Kline would perceive it as mental illness, Harold saw it as the only way to live. It never crossed his mind that he might be wrong. He was always right; it was the rest of the world that was wrong.
Dr. Kline spent the next few minutes talking, listening and analyzing the disjointed ramblings of Harold Cassidy, and came to his conclusion that Harold was not only mentally ill, but he was being intentionally vague, progressively mysterious, and aggressively belligerent. As Kline was about to leave, Harold leaned in, and with a wild eye and a smarmy grin, told Kline something shocking about Aidan that left him speechless. He didn’t believe Harold at first, but Harold dared him to prove him wrong. After all, he chided to Kline, he was there at his child’s birth, he would know.
I have to tell Aidan, Kline thought as he rushed out the door, this could change everything.
Chapter 5
Spring had come early to Arkansas, and like the guest who came for a visit and stayed for a month, spring-like weather remained in the state well into June. And unlike the invading guest who eats all the food and hordes the remote control to the TV, no one complained that spring still influenced the temperatures outside. But even spring had its annoyances, and on occasion produced severe thunderstorms which was usually preceded by thick humidity. Arkansan’s tolerated the storms because they knew that the next day the slate would be wiped clean, and it would be blue skies again.
On this early June morning, the Showy Evening Primrose spread their petals as if to say good morning to the Lily of the Valley, while the magnolia trees fill the air with their sweet aroma. The flora loved the unusual humidity that hung thick in the air, producing water droplets on their leaves, but not so much the rest of the mammals, especially those about to be married. Humidity is a fact of life in the south, but it’s not ideal weather for
an outdoor wedding, where the bride is already as nervous as a school girl receiving the sacrament at her confirmation.
“Honey, would you please go wake up Vicky, while I jump in the shower?” Ellen smiled over at her wife, lying beside her, feigning being asleep. “Joyce, I know you’re awake so you might as well get up.”
The wedding of the century was about to take place. One that would show the world what true love between two women looked like. A wedding such as the south had never seen before, because same sex marriages simply weren’t performed in Arkansas, since the state reneged on the law that had been passed. That didn’t deter Vicky. She would have the wedding of her dreams in the state of her birth, and even though it won’t be recognized by the courts, it would be by her family and friends, and it would be in her heart. That was enough for her… for now. The childhood sweethearts would finally see their wedding come to fruition.
Joyce rolled over and yawned, “So early? Can’t we play doctor first? It is my birthday you know.” She was not one for missing an opportunity when it came to making love with her wife, even if it required a little stretching of the truth.
Ellen gave Joyce one of those looks that told her it wasn’t going to happen. “Your birthday was three weeks ago, missy.”
“Maybe so, but it’s my birthday month, remember? You should feel obliging considering how old I am now.”
Ellen laughed, “Oh honey, you only turned thirty, which isn’t even middle age, and I can assure you that you certainly are nowhere near reaching your peak yet. Now get your cute ass in gear, and go wake up Vicky.”
Joyce sighed, “Yes, ma’am,” and reluctantly crawled out of bed, put on her robe and slippers, and walked out of the room combing her fingers through her unkempt hair.
The luxurious suite at the hotel was spacious and open, with two bedrooms, a kitchen, dining room and living room. Joyce walked to the other end of the hall and tapped lightly on Vicky’s door. Vicky had almost changed her mind last night about leaving, as she slipped out of bed, leaving Aidan with a satisfied smile on her sleeping face. If not for the fact that she would be marrying her in just a few hours, Vicky wanted nothing more in life but to lay snuggled up next to her betrothed, warmed by her body, mind, and soul.
Remember This Day Page 6
