Hunger

by Harmony Raines

  She opened her mouth to tell him to forget it; there was no way he was going to keep coming back for sex. If he wanted her to remain here, then she would, but not for his personal entertainment. But then a wave of nausea hit her and she got up and ran outside.

  Evie didn’t get too far before she heaved and the contents of her stomach hit the ground, leaving her shuddering, her body preparing itself for the next wave. Kneeling, her body tensed and then she was sick again.

  “Evie!”

  “I’m fine,” she said, putting her hand up to stop him coming any closer. “Can you get me a cup of water, please?”

  “Of course.”

  He went back inside, and she tried to get to her feet, but another wave hit her. She remembered being sick as a child, when her mom used to cradle her against her chest, holding her hair out of the way, soothing her, crooning to her that it would be all right. A big sob welled up inside her; she missed that close connection with her mom, and the way her dad always made her feel safe. If she had stayed on Earth and found a husband, that was what she might have now, someone to comfort her. Instead, she had Ishk, who saw her, no doubt, as an inconvenience keeping him from work.

  “Here,” he said, kneeling by the side of her and lifting the cup to her mouth. She took a sip, and instantly a fresh wave of nausea hit her, but her stomach was empty and all she did was retch.

  He produced a handkerchief, a thing that amused her even in the throes of retching. “No, thank you, Ishk, I would hate to get it all messed up.”

  “Take it, Evie, please. Is there anything else I can do for you?”

  “Not unless you have one of those magic potions, like the ocatha, to take away this morning sickness.”

  “Morning sickness? You are sick every morning like this? I never saw it while you were in my house.”

  “No, it’s the baby. Humans get it when they are pregnant; I think it’s compounded because of the difference between our species. Normally a human wouldn’t get it until they are quite few weeks pregnant, not a few days.”

  “I see. I have never seen such a thing in animals.”

  “Good to know, Ishk.” She sat up, feeling it had passed. “My mom used to know of an herb that eased it. She used to keep it in a pot on the windowsill and make a tea out of it whenever a woman in the village got pregnant.”

  “Your mother knew plant lore?”

  “Yes. It was her life’s work, she kept a beautiful garden filled with herbs, grew vegetables for us. As much as she could with the thin soil.” Tears pricked her eyes. She wished her mom was here now, with her herbs and wise words.

  “That is why you have such a love of my garden? Because it reminds you of her?”

  “Yes. I think I will ask if I can start a garden here.”

  “I will help you,” he said.

  “Thank you, Ishk.” She stood up. “It’s passed now. I’ll be all right.” Those words encompassed everything: her past, the present, and her future. His offer of help had made it quite clear. If he intended to help her start a garden here, he intended for her to stay here. He didn’t want her; she had to let go of the notion that he ever would.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine – Ishk

  Too preoccupied to notice the change in her voice, he made sure she was all right before leaving her. She assured him she would be fine, and that the other Earth females, and Okil, no doubt, would be here soon.

  Checking the sentry was still guarding the walls, he made his way home. A quick shower and he would set out for the tower. The suns were just cresting the mountains, sending their light and warmth over the grasslands around him. That was how it felt when he was in Evie’s arms last night; she showered him with the light of her smile and gave him warmth from her emotions. She made him feel happy, and laced it with a need to be a better man. A better lover, a better father to their unborn child, and a better member of the council. He had decided to share his findings with the council.

  First, however, he needed to visit the Archives.

  ***

  No one came down here; most of the information had been transferred to the computers up in the control room. There it was fed out to various other offices, and of course the sim. The sim pulled its data from these archives and then added the information from various other data points. Probes on Earth and other planets they had visited in the vastness of space, sent their information back so that the records were constantly up to date.

  As he descended the steps, he stopped, breathing in the faint musty smell of old documents. Here was stored all the handwritten diaries and journals of the old ways, from the days when his species could only dream of leaving the planet. They lived a simple life, in peace, cocooned within their familys’ love.

  He went to the back of the Archives, and pulled down a journal. It was dated from the time of the great sorrow, when only sons were born and the females were so few, they knew they were on the brink of extinction. Flicking through the pages, his thoughts were confirmed: sadness and despair threatened them. The colours wouldn’t stop, and at night the fierce predators hunted them. The remaining males were easy prey, their skin making them an easy target.

  “We must learn to control what we are. We must shut out the inner turmoil and be at peace, or die at the hands of our own emotions.”

  “As a race we must move beyond what we are and become less, to enable us to become more. The great sorrow has passed, we must never risk such a thing again, or we will fall into history and be forgotten. For the sake of our sons, we must endure.”

  We must endure. It had been his constant mantra in the home where he was brought up. One of his teachers repeated it to him when he practiced containing his emotions. But the Karal would not endure if they stayed this path. It would lead them forever further into the universe, unleashing more dangers on his fragile species. They lost the females of their race because of misfortune. Forcing them to search for females to impregnate. His generation had been presented with an opportunity. They had a choice. A thing their ancestors never had.

  He closed the book, and placed it back on the shelf, searching for a journal before this time, one when the mothers still were still alive and healthy. He began to pull out journals, flicking through the pages until he found what he was looking for.

  It took him several hours, but he was determined not to leave the Archives before he found it. When he did, it felt calmer somehow. There was one more thing left for him to do. Ishk was ready to face the Hier Council. Ready to ask for his female to be returned to him.

  ***

  “Let me make sure I have heard you correctly, Ishk.” The Hier Ruler stood before him, his eyes narrow points, studying Ishk.

  Ishk stood tall and proud, he was strong enough to admit he was wrong. “I understand you would think this a trick. But I have run the sim twice; you are welcome to check the data.”

  “And that data has led you to change your mind about the females? You no longer want them sent to the breeding house,” Lytril said the words slowly and clearly.

  “No,” Ishk confirmed, feeling the other members’ eyes on him, and his colours crept out, slipping along his hands, and it took all of his resolve to stop them from appearing on his face.

  “Forgive my doubt, Ishk,” the Hier Commander said. “It’s just that so complete a change in someone so … zealous, is almost unheard of.”

  “I agree. But the data proved me wrong.”

  “And what of Earth? Will you now comply with our request and allow us to move forward with our mission to find another planet for these humans? To at least maintain a breeding stock of females.”

  This he did not wholly agree with. But he was tired of fighting. The Hier Council, or more precisely the Hier Ruler, held Ishk’s fate in his hands, and that of Evie. If he complied with their mission, they might let him have her back.

  “Yes. If it is the majority verdict of the council, I will not block it.” That was the best he could do; he could not agree, but he would not disagree.

&
nbsp; “Very well. Thank you, Ishk. Torac, as Hier Commander I wish you to prepare the mission immediately. We will work with the President of Earth to find five females who will travel with our long-range pilots.”

  “Females? You wish to take females on these missions?” Ishk said in disbelief.

  “Yes. To one thing we are all committed, there will be no removal of males from Earth unless it is to make a breeding colony. We have not changed our views there, Ishk. The females will be selected from the lottery pool, and they will be trained and then accompany a pilot on the long-range missions.”

  “I see.” Ishk saw the Hier Commander move and sensed the meeting was ending. “There is one more thing.”

  “Yes, Ishk?”

  “I wish to request the female, Evie, be given back to me.”

  The Hier Ruler could not help the flash of blue that crossed his face. Ishk held his breath and kept his colours under control. He had crossed the Hier Ruler, he had instigated the whipping of Lytril’s female, and now the Hier Ruler could take his revenge.

  “You were so set against having her with you. You sent her away and in doing so you gave up any claim to her.”

  “I know, Hier Ruler.”

  Lytril glanced around the table, taking in the emotions of the other members in a way only he was capable of. Then he looked at Ishk and studied him for a long time, until Ishk’s colours spiralled out of his control and they swam across his face.

  “Do you wish me to beg, Hier Ruler?”

  “As Vanessa begged you, Ishk?” Lytril hissed sharply.

  Ishk stood tall and determined. “I apologise for my actions towards your female, Hier Ruler.”

  “It is not me you need to apologise to,” Lytril said curtly.

  “I will seek out Vanessa and make it well with her.”

  Lytril approached him. “If Vanessa forgives you, then you can claim Evie once more. But only if Evie is willing. She is not your slave; she has kept her side of the lottery bargain. If she rejects you, then she will be free to remain at the breeding house and then moved to Grenvet. That is my ruling.”

  “Thank you, Hier Ruler.” Ishk stood still while the other members filed out. Only when he was alone did he rest his hands on the big ornate table and let out his breath. That was the hardest thing he had ever done, swallowing his pride, admitting defeat. And yet it was nothing to the unease he felt about facing Vanessa, the woman he had ordered whipped. The whip used by the Karal as means of punishment left no physical trace, but it had damaged her human nervous system terribly. She had lost all control of her emotions to the point that they had deserted her.

  Now she was healed, and strong. Would she forgive him, or ruin his future happiness as he had so cruelly tried to ruin hers?

  Chapter Thirty – Evie

  She bathed in the warm water that flowed through a communal bathroom. From what she could tell, the water was a stream, part of which was diverted into a filtration system and heated using solar power, before been sent through a reed bed, and then any drain-off re-joined the stream.

  After she had washed, she had spent an hour figuring out how it all worked, fascinated by the simple yet effective system. The suns warmed her skin and dried her hair and by the time she walked back to her house, she felt better and ate some fruit, relaxing on the bed and wondering what today would bring.

  It brought furniture. And helping hands who soon got to work cleaning and decorating the other rooms in her house. Drapes were put up, and soft furnishings made the place a lot more homely. They worked hard, a sense of human satisfaction strong in the clean, clear Karalian air.

  “Lunch, I think,” Celia said. “Okil, will you fetch the food we brought? Thank you.”

  Okil went to the cruiser. He looked relieved to be able to lay down the shovel he had been armed with all morning. He was beginning to mark out and then dig the flowerbeds Evie wanted. Kindly promising her seeds and any plants he could get his hands on. He knew someone who had some to spare.

  “Okil always seems to know someone,” Vanessa said. “He took me over to Grenvet for some paint when I first arrived.”

  “What’s Grenvet like?” Evie asked.

  “Beautiful, green with a lovely coast.” She looked at Evie, and noted her thoughtful frown. “I thought you wanted to stay here.”

  “I do. Well, at least I think I do. But then I wonder if I might be better away from … here.” She looked down at the small pastry in her hand, her appetite gone.

  “Did something happen, Evie?” Vanessa asked.

  “No,” she said shaking her head quickly.

  “Did Ishk come here? Did he hurt you?”

  “No. He wouldn’t hurt me.”

  “But he did come here?”

  The others were listening now. “If you want me to get Lytril to banish him or something, I would be more than happy to.”

  “No, thank you, Vanessa, I need to deal with this. Last night he seemed so … I don’t know. I thought we made a connection. And then this morning he couldn’t wait to get away.”

  “That’s men for you. Present company excluded, Okil,” Celia said with a smile.

  “Thank you. It’s nice to see I am appreciated.” He bowed his head in response.

  “Always.” Celia patted him on the back.

  “Yes, Okil, I should thank you for bringing everyone and everything here this morning. The house is already transformed.”

  “My pleasure, Evie. I want you to be happy.”

  “Okil wants everyone to be happy,” Vanessa teased affectionately.

  Whereas Ishk wanted everyone to suffer. No, she was being unkind. He was mixed up, and mixed up people say and do things they don’t necessarily mean. She placed her hand on her stomach. That mixed up man would be the sole guardian of their child.

  “Evie. He’s here. Do you want Okil to ask him to leave?” Elissa asked.

  Evie looked up quickly and then stood up. Ishk had pulled into the courtyard and was getting out. The others all stood too, moving in front of Evie as if to protect her. She wanted to tell them not to be so stupid, but then she remembered he had treated Vanessa cruelly. None of them trusted him. Except her.

  “Ishk,” she said, going forward. “I thought you were in a council meeting.”

  “I was. But the meeting finished, we reached our decision and now I have come here.” He looked past Evie, towards Vanessa. “I have come to do something I should have done some weeks ago.”

  “What do you want?” Vanessa stepped forward, and Okil followed to stand by her side. If it came down to it, Evie could tell Okil was under orders to protect Vanessa with his life. That was why he was always around. He was their own private bodyguard.

  “I have come to offer my sincerest apologises to you Vanessa,” Ishk said.

  Vanessa paled and took a step back. “What is your game, Ishk?”

  “No game. It has taken me some time to understand why I acted the way I did.” The big Karalian’s chest heaved; Evie could see how hard this was for him. A man with such pride, such a hard reputation, standing here in front of the human females he had tried endlessly to shut away, and he was at their mercy. But why? What did he have to gain from this?

  “Then I accept your apology in the same way it is given.” Vanessa nodded curtly and moved away, back to the others, shaken to the core, and mystified.

  Ishk was not finished, however. “Do I have your forgiveness?”

  Vanessa turned, her eyes flashing. “Accepting your apology is one thing, Ishk, but forgiving you is quite another. I think there is something behind this sudden change of heart, some gain you want, and I suspect it is at the expense of Lytril.”

  Elissa came to stand by Vanessa. “Calm down, he is not worth you getting so worked up over. You should go, Ishk. Give her some time.”

  “I do not have the luxury of time,” he said and his eyes flicked over to Evie. Something that Elissa noticed.

  “Ishk, Vanessa does not believe you are sincere. Will you let me read
you?” Elissa offered her hands to Ishk, who looked at them with distaste. “I realise you think of me as an abomination, but it’s the best chance you’re going to get to prove yourself.”

  “Not an abomination.” He placed his hands in hers, and she gasped with shock.

  With Ishk staring straight into her eyes, trying not to hide anything, Elissa spoke. Her hands were glowing with colours as they connected with Ishk’s skin.

  “What is that? What’s wrong with Elissa’s hands?” Evie asked Celia quietly.

  “She damaged her hands. Marin tried to repair them on the space station and somehow the DNA was mixed up and the new skin has some Karalian properties. She can read their emotions, but it also means they can read hers. As Lytril did when she first came here. It’s a little unnerving for both parties.

  “You’re scared of me,” Elissa said.

  “You are a mixture of us. The first time this has happened.”

  “And you don’t like anything that is different.”

  “You are right, it scares me,” he acknowledged.

  “And what about your apology to Vanessa, did you mean it?”

  “Yes,” Ishk nodded to confirm his words.

  “Is there some reason you want her to forgive you?”

  He looked uncomfortable, but had to answer truthfully or else Elissa would know he was lying and his chance would have gone to prove himself worthy. “Yes.”

  “I knew it. You are only ever interested in what you have to gain. You had me whipped so that I would not want to be with Lytril, so that I would end up here. You hated the thought of your Hier Ruler changing his mind about humans,” Vanessa accused.

  “Yes. I did. But now it’s different.” His eyes flicked to Evie once more.

  Elissa abruptly dropped his hands, although their gaze was now locked, Ishk’s one of pleading. Then Elissa said, “Vanessa, I need to talk to you.”

  “What?” Vanessa said as Elissa took her arm and led her away.

  Celia leaned towards Evie as the other two women walked away. “I’ll tell you something, Evie. Things were never this exciting before you came.”