by Ivy Jordan
“I agree with that. How about Mike? Have the two of you always gotten along so well?”
I laughed. “You think we get along well?”
“Yeah. You seem to have a great relationship. Am I wrong?”
“Well, I guess not. I mean, we don’t always see eye to eye, and we’ve had a lot of problems in the past. But I’m glad to hear you say that. Maybe we’re finally growing up. I mean, he’s the only family I have left. I think I need to appreciate him a bit more, and vice versa. It’s hard to admit to that sometimes. We’re both so stubborn. How about you? Any brothers or sisters?” I tried once again to ease the conversation back to her. I always felt a lot more comfortable when she was talking about her own life.
She shook her head. “No. I’m an only child. I used to wish that I had a brother or a sister though. I used to look at all my friends and feel jealous that they had someone to share their life with. But I’m not sure anymore. I mean, sometimes it’s still something I wish I had, while other times I’m grateful that I don’t have one. I’ve had to figure things out on my own, and that’s not always a bad thing. I guess there’s always two ways of looking at things and it’s not like it’s something I could exactly change about my life.”
“Yeah, well, if it makes you feel any better, sometimes I wish I didn’t have a brother and other times I’m so happy that I do. You just deal with the cards that life throws at you.”
She smiled. “Sort of like being out here. This is amazing, Travis. I’m so glad we did this now.”
“You mean you’re glad you forced me into it,” I teased.
“Oh please, you wanted to come.”
“I did,” I admitted. “And you’re right. This is nice. There’s something about being outside and watching the stars. I’m not even sure if we’ll sleep in the tent at this rate.”
She sighed happily. “I’m actually all right with that.”
She moved closer to me, and I kissed her. This time the kiss was not so much passionate as it was loving. With the cool air embracing us, and the stars above us, I realized that this experience with Harper had turned into something more. I tried to push the thoughts away, but I knew without a doubt that I was starting to fall for her. And I was falling for her hard.
Chapter Thirty-One
Harper
As it turned out, Travis and I never slept in the tent. We’d enjoyed being out under the stars so much, that we’d fallen asleep there too. When I woke up, I saw that there was a pillow under my head and a blanket around me, which I knew wasn’t there when I’d first fallen asleep with him. That made me smile. People always thought it was the big things that made a difference, but it wasn’t. It was the little things. Grand gestures were nice, but they were pointless without the little ones. I turned around and saw that Travis was awake. He was just lying there with his eyes open and a frown on his face. I wondered why he was so lost in thought and what he was thinking about. There was so much I still had to learn about him, but a big part of me didn’t want to know too much either. It was weird trying to get to know someone that you were simply going to walk away from soon. So I decided not to ask him what was on his mind. If he didn’t want to tell me, then that was fine.
“Morning,” I said and smiled at him.
He turned to face me. “Good morning. Did you sleep okay?”
I nodded. “I did. I can’t believe we never slept in the tent. Thank you for the blanket and the pillow. That was so nice of you. I really appreciate that.”
He pushed a strand of hair away from my eyes, tucking it behind my ears. “It gets cold here at night. And I wanted you to have a good night’s rest. It’s not often that you get to sleep outside.”
“Tell me about it. I don’t even have a garden where I am. So I’m not going to be able to do this for a long time.”
“You could always go and sleep in Central Park,” he said and laughed.
“Sadly I’d probably get mugged. It was nice to not worry about things like that for a change. Oh, Jillian is going to be shocked when she finds out that I did this. She is not going to believe it.”
“You know, I’m glad that Jillian went home,” Travis said. “Sorry, I know she’s your best friend, and I really do like her. But this would never have happened if she had stayed. I’m also glad that there was a storm and that Jackson was caught trying to steal a cow. If any of those things didn’t happen, it wouldn’t be just the two of us out here.”
I smiled. “You’re right. Jillian would’ve hated this too. Can you imagine her out on the horse for such a long time? Poor thing. I wonder if she would’ve been better if her heart had been in it a bit more. She kept thinking that all the animals hated her. I don’t think that’s true. I think they just knew that she didn’t want to be here. I’m also very glad that you turned her down. Imagine if you had liked her back.”
He shook his head. “Not a chance. I think I wanted you from the time you stepped off that shuttle. I was so surprised when she came up and flirted with me.”
I laughed. “Yeah, I wasn’t too happy about that, but I didn’t want to stop her either. She had no idea I fancied you too.”
“You did?”
“Of course I did. I just didn’t want to admit it to anyone.”
“Why not? Embarrassed of being attracted to a cowboy?” he said with a strange smirk on his face. Again it felt like he had something on his mind that he wasn’t telling me.
“Are you crazy? Everyone wants to meet a cowboy. Nah, I just didn’t want to get in the way of you and Jillian.”
“I’m glad she went back to her boyfriend. So, should we get our stuff and get moving? We can take a break soon enough for something to eat unless you want to eat now?”
I shook my head. “Nah, we can eat something on the way. You just let me know when you want to stop.”
We rode for a few hours, and I tried my best to enjoy the ride as much as possible. Riding back wasn’t nearly the same as riding there. It was like coming home from a big holiday, and knowing that it had all come to an end. When we stopped, he took me to a little forested grove to take a break. He got out some beef jerky and a few other snacks, and we sat in the shade to enjoy it. I knew we should be having a good time, but neither of us seemed to be in the mood for talking. I felt a little glum, knowing that it was my last day. I couldn’t believe how quickly my time had gone here. Tomorrow I’d be heading back home to NYC, and all of this would become but a distant memory to me. I wanted to remember everything. I wanted to etch the details in my memory so that I could recall them whenever I wanted to. But I was afraid that they would simply fade, like memories always did. I wondered if he was feeling the same way as I did. I was so lost in thought that I jumped at the sound of his voice.
“Want to take a shower by the stream?”
I smiled. “Yeah. That sounds great.”
We walked to the stream and took our clothes off. Travis produced a tiny little soap from his bag and handed it to me, and the two of us stood at the water, washing ourselves and then each other. Soon we were kissing, and it wasn’t long before we’d made our way back to make love on the grass. When we had our clothes back on, he told me that we wanted to stay a little bit longer, and he pulled me towards him. We just lay like that for a while, neither of us saying anything to one another. Travis was so quiet I thought he might be sleeping, but his breathing seemed normal. Was he sad about me leaving too?
With his arms around me, I knew that I had fallen in love with Travis. No matter how many times I tried to talk myself out of it, I could feel it deep in the core of my being. I had never felt this way about anyone before. I thought of all the things that Jillian had told me about the way she felt about Thomas, and I now finally understood what she was talking about. This was very different from the way I had felt about other guys. But no matter how good it felt to be with him, or to know that I was in love with him, I also knew that it was not going to work out. This had always been just a little holiday romance, and it would never l
ead to anymore more than that. It was a difficult pill to swallow, but it was the truth. For a while, I’d wondered if he would move to the city. He’d mentioned before that he’d gone out to see the rest of the world and the thought had pleased me. He spoke highly of the city and didn’t seem to shy away from it. But the truth was that he wasn’t a city boy. He was a country guy who always came back here no matter where he traveled to. For a while, I even toyed with the idea of moving here myself, but that wouldn’t work out either. I loved riding the horses, and I loved being out in the country, but I would always be NYC girl with an urban existence. I knew that I would not be able to move to the countryside permanently, no matter how much I had enjoyed it. At the end of the day, I wasn’t prepared to get into a long-distance relationship. I had never believed in them—certainly not a serious one at least. At the end of the day, we were just two fundamentally different people who had simply come together at a time that was convenient for both of us.
Travis must’ve sensed that I was deep in thought because he suddenly asked me if everything was okay. It annoyed me a little that he knew that I was upset. But it only annoyed me because it was so sweet of him to know that. It was going to be hard to leave him behind. This guy that seemed to know me so well. Why couldn’t he be horrible so that the leaving part could be easy? I knew I should never have gotten myself into this mess. I was not good at holiday romances. Especially not one as good as this.
“I’m fine,” I lied. “I’m just tired.”
“Ah, well, we’re going to be back soon,” he said. “Maybe we should get going. It’s probably time to head back anyway.”
“Yeah, okay,” I said even though I didn’t want to.
I was just about to get up when I felt his entire body tense up. I knew immediately that something had happened and that it wasn’t good.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Wait. Don’t say anything,” he whispered. As he did so, I heard the horses make a sound. They seemed to be frightened, and I wondered what was going on. Then I heard a strange snorting sound that didn’t sound like it was coming from the horses at all. I turned slowly and saw a wild boar standing not too far away from us. I felt my heart thrash against my chest.
“What must we do?” I whispered back.
“Just get up very slowly. No sudden movements or sounds. I’m going to try and get the boar's attention. As soon as I do, I want you to mount your horse. Okay?”
“Please be careful.”
“I will. Okay, on the count of three, two, one…” he said, and I slowly got up. I tried desperately not to make a sound, but I was suddenly aware of every single noise I was making. Even my breath seemed loud to me.
I made my way to the horse and waited for Travis to tell me when to make my move. He threw something towards the boar, and I quickly hopped onto the horse. He ran back, narrowly dodging the boar on his return, and jumped onto his horse. The two of us galloped off into the distance, leaving the angry boar behind. We rode for about ten minutes before we finally slowed down.
“Holy crap, that was scary!” I said. “Thanks, Travis. I’m not sure what I would’ve done if you weren’t here. Talk about an adrenalin rush. Can you imagine Jackson? He would’ve freaked if he saw this. We probably shouldn’t tell him about this. He will be upset that he missed out.”
“Well, at least you don’t have to worry about wild boar attacks back in NYC,” he said.
“Perhaps not,” I said. “But there are a lot of other things to worry about.”
We rode off without saying much more about the topic. I wished he hadn’t brought up home again. It just reminded me that our time together was up and that today was our last day together. I wanted to ride back and sleep under the stars again. I wanted to ask if we could do it all over again. But what was the point? Eventually, I would have to face up to the reality that this was not meant to be. I was not meant to be with a country guy, and he was not meant to be with a city girl. I would never forget what had happened between us but all good things came to an end.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Travis
I didn’t want to go back to the ranch. I also wished that I didn’t do this camping experience with Harper. I wanted to go back in time and tell her that it was a bad idea. It wasn’t that it had been bad. Quite the opposite. It had been good. Too good. My heart felt heavy as we rode back in silence. I always knew that this thing with Harper, whatever it was, was going to come to an end. It had, however, come sooner than I wanted it to.
As we got back, we made our way to the stables to put the horses back and to unload. We climbed off, and I saw Harper looking sadly at Thunder.
“He’s going to miss you,” I said to her although I wasn’t sure if I was talking about the horse or myself anymore.
“I’m going to miss him too.”
“You’ll get your own horse though.”
She nodded. “Yeah, but it’s not going to be the same.”
“Nah, it will be great. You’ll see. You’ll develop a great relationship with the new horse and when you’re out riding, you can tell him all about Thunder.”
She smiled. “I’ll do that. Hey, I was thinking, you saved me twice now. You know that? Once in the storm and once with that boar.”
“A boar?”
We turned around to see Mike and Allison standing there. They seemed concerned.
“Oh, hey guys,” I said. “Yeah. There’s a wild boar on the loose. We were lucky to get away. Thankfully Harper is good in times of emergency. Can you imagine if Jackson was there? He’d probably try to hunt it.”
Mike chuckled. “He would’ve. Anyway, we’re going to have to get a few guys to go over and hunt the boar, or at least chase it away. We can’t risk having guests getting attacked on rides. But, boar aside, did you have a good time?”
I grinned. “It was great. And Harper here finally got to experience what it’s like to sleep under the stars.”
“Didn’t you bring a tent?” Allison asked.
Harper chuckled. “We did, but it was so nice outside. It was great. And we were lucky enough not to get another storm. How was everything here?”
“Oh, it was fine. We did a lot of cleaning after the storm and did a few indoor activities. Jackson kept to himself. I think he finally understands that what he did was wrong. He hated that he missed out on the final ride. I think us telling him that he can’t go is what made him finally realize that he shouldn’t have done what he did.”
I sighed. “Poor guy. I keep moving between feeling sorry for him and hating him.”
“I think we all do. So, tonight we’ll do a final dinner with everyone. That’s all that’s really left on the schedule. We’ll do something early so that everyone can have an early night. Harper, maybe meet us I the dining hall at around five.”
Harper nodded. “Five sounds great. Do you need me for anything until then?”
“No, you just go and relax.”
“I think I need a shower first and foremost. I’ll see you all later,” she said and walked away.
I watched in silence as she walked away, forgetting that Mike and Allison were watching me. When I turned to look at them, I just shook my head and continued with the horses.
“You okay?” Allison asked.
“Fine.”
“Was it horrible? Sounds like you had a good time but was she only saying that?” Allison probed some more.
“No,” I said. “It was amazing. Incredible. We had the best time out there. That’s the problem.”
“You could go and see her again, you know,” Mike said.
“Nah. Different cities. Anyway, she doesn’t want anything serious from this.”
“I’m sorry, man. For what it’s worth, it was nice seeing you happy,” Mike said.
I wanted to have a proper shower too, so I decided to walk back to the house. It was good to clear my head and to try and put everything into perspective. I’d gone after Harper knowing that nothing was going to come of it, s
o I wasn’t sure why I was so upset. She was a great girl, but there was no future with us. I pushed the thoughts away as I walked, trying instead to think about all the things I had to look forward to. I still had my book to write, and I had to prepare some more lectures for work. I wasn’t the sort of professor who liked to just wing it when I was up there in class. I always prepared and always arrived with a solid plan. I was going to be very busy. When I got to the house, I climbed in the shower and tried desperately to scrub my emotions away. Then I sat down at my desk and stared at my computer. I wanted to do some work before the dinner that evening, but the more I tried to work, the less the inspiration came to me. Perhaps things would be different once the group had finally gone home. I could do what I had intended to do all along. They’d been a huge distraction, but it would all go back to normal the next day.
Eventually, I closed my computer and headed out again. There was still a bit of time before dinner, but I couldn’t sit at the desk any longer. So I walked back to the ranch, taking the long route and wondering what to do with myself. When I ended up at the guest house, I knew that it wasn’t by mistake.
I knocked on the door, and when I walked in her room, I saw Harper lying on the bed. I smiled at her.
“Hey, just thought I’d come and see how you were doing. Did you have a nice shower?”
She smiled. “Yeah, it was great. Not exactly the same as showering by a stream, but it was good. I feel tired now that I’m back, which is strange because while we were out there, I felt like I had so much energy.”
“Yeah, I feel the same. Mind if I join you?”
She scooted over and patted the bed beside her. “Of course not.”
I climbed onto the bed and lay next to her. I took her hand and stroked it with my thumb. “So, you’re leaving tomorrow. Did you have a good time?”
“I have never wanted to do something less in my life,” she said. “And yet, despite that, I have honestly had the most amazing experience. It was, indeed, the most life-changing thing I have ever done. I thought it was going to be so stupid. I thought I was going to hate being outdoors, but I’ve loved it. And I’ve opened up aspects to my personality that I didn’t even know where there. I’m very interested to see how I feel about things when I get back. I assume I’ll get back into it pretty easily, but I’m hoping I don’t forget it too quickly. Or ever.”
