“But I do mind,” she blurted, turning her attention to Briar, looking her up and down. “I mind very much. You’re parading around with this lab experiment as if she’s some kind of catch. Pampering her like a princess. Look at her. She’s pathetic!” She turned the wineglass up, trying to suck out one last drop. “Homely Oklahoma hick. That’s what she is.”
“That’s enough.” Lukas released Briar and grabbed hold of Reid’s wrist. “You’ve had too much to drink.”
Her fingers spread, and she let the glass drop to the floor. “Oops,” she said, gazing down at the shards of crystal littering the polished marble. “Look what you made me do.” She pulled her arm from Lukas. “Hey!” She pointed at Briar’s ankle monitor. “Sleeping Beauty is part robot!”
A busboy with a tiny broom and dustpan materialized.
Briar stepped back from the broken glass, her insides boiling. “Part robot is better than completely orange. Where’d you get your spray tan? The snow cone stand?”
Reid’s nostrils flared. Her face turned from drink-mix orange to fire-engine red, matching her skimpy dress. “Don’t be alarmed,” she bellowed over the soft music. “She can’t help it. It’s her brain defect talking. She’s not really supposed to be around people. That’s why she has the ankle monitor—to keep her from wandering into the sane population.”
Reid threw her fiery gaze around the surrounding couples who were no longer dancing. “But Lukas felt sorry for the little lab rat, so he dragged her along this evening. That’s OK. Because in a few days Lukas will dissolve the part of her brain that makes her crazy, and all will be right with the world.” Reid offered a fake smile so white Briar could smell the bleach.
Every ounce of air in the room disappeared. Briar didn’t need to breathe anyway. She was running on fuel, not oxygen. Just like the hot air balloons outside. And Reid had provided the flame. Briar could either explode or rise above it. She chose both.
“No matter what you do to your outside, your inside is still ugly. And it shows through. There’s not enough orange paint in the entire world to cover up that much ugly.” Briar turned to Lukas. “I really appreciate you dragging me along to your fancy shindig. On behalf of all the lab rats of the world, thank you.”
Explosion accomplished. The “rising above it” part would prove more difficult. She walked briskly as possible through the ballroom, fighting the urge to run.
“Don’t go too far,” Reid called, humor in her voice. “Your ankle bracelet—remember?” Her mocking laughter followed Briar out the front doors.
Briar clipped down the endless steps and rounded the building. A hot air balloon floated in the darkness, embodying a beauty and light she longed to hold inside. She’d held it once, long ago, when she was a little girl. But somehow it slipped away. Or maybe she’d blown out the flame.
What did it matter now anyway? If there was any of that light left, it would soon be extinguished. And that was fine with her.
Her eyes followed the lone balloon in the night sky. Who needed beauty and light? Those things sounded a lot like love. The Scientist and the Lab Rat. Now there was a tale for Mouse. No lovey-dovey mush or kissing, so he should like it fine.
Except it was too sad to tell.
She swiped angrily at her cheeks.
“Hey, what are you doing out here all alone?” The sound of Derby’s voice made her jump.
“Oh, hey, Derby. I was taking a walk.”
“By the light of the moon? In those shoes?” He shook his head at her silver high heels. “I doubt it. Something wrong?”
“OK, you caught me.” She shrugged. “But I’d rather not say, because it involves your girlfriend.”
He chuckled. “Not my girlfriend—yet. Look, I know I’m a bit simple, but I do know a thing or two about women. Reid is a lot like my ex. Maybe that’s why I’m so taken by her. Anyway, that’s neither here nor there. My point is, she’s insecure, and she’s threatened by you.”
A laugh burst through Briar’s lips. “Oh, really? She told you that?”
“She didn’t have to tell me. I can see it for myself. She’s jealous—of your freedom.”
“Freedom!” Briar placed a hand against the brick building for balance and extended her foot. “Shackle-girl, remember?”
“The freedom you carry inside. You have something most people don’t. And Reid doesn’t like it. Why do you think she’s so gung-ho for you to get rid of it? Personally, I think people should live how they darn well please. God is real, God is a fairy tale. So, what? But it’s the law.”
Sighing, Briar folded her hands behind her and pressed her back against the wall. “I know.”
He looked her square in the eye. “People like you make people like Reid feel as if they’re missing out on something.” He dragged his gaze to the moon. “In time, I’m hoping I can help fill that void that she feels inside.”
“Hope you have a million years and a front loader the size of the Grand Canyon, because that chick’s pretty empty.”
Derby turned his cap around backwards and pretended to put up his dukes.
“I’m kidding,” Briar said. She was—sort of.
~*~
“You might need to call that busboy back to sweep up your dignity.” Lukas turned his back to Reid and stormed from the ballroom. He needed to find Briar.
What a jerk he’d been—again—for letting the altercation with Reid happen. He should’ve known the two of them would bump into each other. Or, more accurately, that Reid would steamroll over Briar the first chance she got.
Reid had feelings for him—he’d known it for a long time, but never cared to admit it. The whole thing made him incredibly uncomfortable. He’d never be able to reciprocate those feelings, and had no desire to.
But Briar was different. She had something special—a warmth he had no trouble reciprocating. Inside, she held something unique and real. Something Reid would never have.
Something he may be personally responsible for killing with his own hands.
That was ridiculous. His conscience was suggesting Briar had a soul. Years ago, it had been proven there was no such thing. He wasn’t killing anything. He was making it possible for her to live.
He rounded the building then recoiled, quietly stepping backward and retreating a few feet. Normally, the sound of Briar’s laughter brightened his spirits and tickled his heart. But not tonight. The sound of it rolled his stomach over.
Derby’s laughter, loud and carefree, mingled with hers.
Lukas grimaced. Less than five minutes ago, she’d flown from the ballroom, upset. He’d come to console her, expecting to find her crying, curled up on the front steps or wilted under one of the large pines. Instead, she and Derby were sharing a moment alone together under the moonlight.
It was a proven fact—the soul did not exist. The heart, on the other hand, was an entirely different subject.
14
Briar peeled the blue silk dress over her head and tossed it to the floor. She kicked it to the corner, pried the silver shoes from her feet, and flung them on top. She tossed her earrings onto the nightstand and shrugged into her bathrobe.
She should have never agreed to accompany Lukas to that stupid ball. She should’ve known better. No, actually, Lukas should have known better. Reid daily went out of her way to make Briar’s life miserable at the lab. He’d known Reid would be there, yet hadn’t had the decency to warn Briar so that she could steer clear. All that talk about missing her and wanting to start fresh—right. He’d stood right there and let Reid sabotage her in front of all those people in their fancy clothes. What he’d wanted was a quick no-strings-attached date for the ball. And she’d fallen for the old “let’s be friends” routine. Never again. She’d learned her lesson, big time.
Though she had to admit, the outdoor festival had been great. Seeing the balloons in person enhanced their beauty and intensified her desire to float high above the earth someday.
She sat on the edge of the bed massaging one fo
ot, then the other. Just float away. Far from ankle monitors, malicious blonde lab technicians, and—best of all—Lukas Stone.
She needed to intensify her nagging. The more she bugged him about administering the abstergent, the quicker he’d cave in.
The quicker she’d be free.
A thump on her door caused the hackles on her neck to stand up. So help her, if that man was skulking outside her door again, she wouldn’t be responsible for what she might do. She lunged from the bed to the door, barely touching the ground, hoping to catch him in the act.
Through the peephole she spied Roxy, big yellow tail thumping away.
“Roxy!” She swung the door open, dropped to her knees, and hugged the animal.
“Sorry, ma’am.” Gatlin appeared behind Roxy. “She broke away and ran straight to your room, like she’d been whistled at or something.”
“Don’t be sorry, I’m happy to see her—and you.” She released the dog and hugged Gatlin. “But what’s with you calling me ma’am?” She sat back on her heels and looked at him.
He shrugged. “Lira said it’s polite to call ladies ma’am and men sir.”
She nodded. “Yes, Lira’s right about that. But you and I are friends. And friends don’t have to be so formal with one another. You can call me Briar.”
He gazed with his greenish-gold eyes on the ceiling, as if thinking it over. “OK. If you’re sure it’s all right.”
“Good.” She patted the boy’s back and stood.
“Hey, you still have my rock!” he scooted around her and into the room.
In your present condition, my son will not benefit from a relationship with you. Briar’s breath caught as Caster’s angry words tumbled through her mind. “I’m not sure you should come in. Your dad might be looking for you.”
“Nah. He’s out of town on business. Uncle Lukas picked me up after his fancy party to give Lira a break. I’m staying over.”
Her shoulders relaxed. “OK, but only for a few minutes. I don’t want your uncle worrying about where you’ve run off to.” She glanced both directions down the hallway and shut the door.
Gatlin plucked the rock from the nightstand, squinting at it. “Yep. This is mine, all right.”
Briar smiled. “Of course, it’s yours. I keep it there because I like to look at it.” She turned her gaze from the honey-brown stone. It reminded her of Lukas’s eyes. That rock would go into a drawer as soon as the little boy left the room.
Gatlin put the rock back on the nightstand and shoved a hand into his pocket. “Briar, sit down with me.” He sat on the floor and patted the empty space beside him. “I want to show you something.”
He’d called her by name. Heart melting, she lowered to the floor and curled her legs under her.
Roxy walked a slow circle before resting at Briar’s side.
Gatlin straightened the wrinkled paper in his palm. “My dad doesn’t know I have this.” He passed the tattered square to her.
Briar’s heart slowed to a stop. The beautiful, dark haired woman with charcoal eyes smiled from the flimsy photograph. The name Kate Stone was printed beneath in calligraphy font. A picture of Gatlin’s mother, clipped from her funeral pamphlet.
She slipped an arm around his slim shoulders. “Oh, Gatlin. She was beautiful.”
“Where is she, Briar?” he asked, his voice a breathy squeak. “Where’s my mom? Where is she?”
She tightened her grip around his small body.
“Are her eyes gone? Jack said bodies turn to dirt. I don’t want her to be dirt!” His back shook with sobs.
Roxy lifted her head lazily to look at her little companion. She whimpered softly.
Briar stroked Gatlin’s hair. “Who’s Jack?”
“On the show Lira watches.” He raised his wet face to her. “Don’t tell her I listened. I was hiding behind the couch.”
“I won’t tell.” Briar recognized the program he mentioned. A crime scene investigation series he had no business being in earshot of.
“Where is she?” He continued to stare up at her, his eyes pleading. “Is she rotten? Jack said dead people turn rotten.” His breath shortened and his words hitched out. “I don’t want her to be rotten!” He squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head.
Briar brushed the sleeve of her robe over the little boy’s face. “Shh, it’s OK.” She shuddered, picturing the images that played beneath those small, trembling eyelids.
Those terrible visions were lies. Her body was under the earth, yes—but not her spirit. And her spirit wasn’t part of the “amissfear,” either. His mother hadn’t turned into the air Gatlin breathed.
Briar knew the truth. She hugged him to her chest and kissed the top of his head. How could she refuse this sweet little boy his peace of mind? Keeping the truth from him was as bad as lying.
Worse.
Briar closed her eyes and prayed. Really prayed. The way Granna Grace taught her to pray. Closing out the world around her, she concentrated on the Holy Spirit, asking for His direction. Praying for the quick answer she needed. Thanking Him for the opportunity to help the sweet child hurting in her arms. Her heartbeat quickened, making her lightheaded. She breathed deeply, in through her nose, out through her mouth. She’d bet that right about now, her Agathi were glowing like crazy.
She didn’t want to make Gatlin promise to keep a secret about God, but in this case, what else could she do? If Caster found out what she’d done—how she’d defied his order not to talk to Gatlin. She bit her lip, trying not to think of his angry, steel eyes.
On second thought, maybe Gatlin wouldn’t need to promise. He wouldn’t remember what she told him anyway, because of the leveling serum. The SAP would keep him from absorbing any information about God. Would her words be like a nursery rhyme to him? Or would they bounce off like rubber? She had no idea. All she knew was that it was important for him to hear the truth about his mother right now. He needed to be able to be comforted—if only for a moment.
“It’s my turn to show you something.” Briar scooped up the little boy and set him on the bed.
Roxy yawned, stood, stretched, and laid back down.
She felt under her pillow and slid the lamb keychain from underneath. “My grandmother made this little lamb for me when I was not much older than you.”
Gatlin reached for the stuffed animal. “It’s soft,” he said, holding it to his damp cheek.
Briar smiled. “It is soft. Pretty cute, too, don’t you think?”
He nodded, still holding the lamb close.
“But you know what?” She lowered her head to whisper in his ear. “There’s a surprise inside.”
He jerked the animal from his cheek, jingling the keys, and squeezed it between his fingers.
“Can you feel it in there?”
He sucked in a breath, his eyes widening with excitement. “Something hard! What is it?”
“Something very special.” She picked up one of her earrings from the nightstand, carefully using the metal hook at the top to break the thread. Excitement zipped through her. In a moment, she would once again hold God’s Word in her hands.
Gatlin’s hand shot out and back a few times.
Briar glanced at him and he licked his lips, his eyes glued to the threads popping from the lamb’s seam. His anticipation made her grin. He couldn’t wait to get his little fingers on whatever was inside.
Finally, the seam was open. She looked at Gatlin and wiggled her fingers inside. Slowly, she slid Granna Grace’s miniature Bible from the soft cotton.
“A book!” He exclaimed.
She nodded. “Have you ever seen a book this tiny?”
“No. Never.” He shook his head. “Can I hold it?”
“Yes.” She placed the book into his restless fingers. “But hold it very gently. It is a very small book, but it holds the biggest thing in the whole world.”
His eyes shot from the book to her face.
“Life.” She tapped the black cover. “My grandma gave this book to m
e. It is called the Bible. It is a very special book from God.”
“Who is God?” Gatlin tapped the book, just as Briar had.
“God is who made the whole world, and every person and animal inside it. He made the sky and the stars, the sun and the moon. God made everything.”
“Even Roxy?”
She chuckled. “Even Roxy.”
The sleeping dog twitched an ear at the sound of her name.
“Know what else? Every single thing this book says is the truth. So when it says God will make us feel better when we are sad, it is true. And it does say that, Gatlin.”
He held the book close to his face and peeked inside. “Lots of letters.”
“Yep. Lots and lots of letters. And those letters say that God loves you, and if you believe in Him, He will take care of you and never leave you. Know what else the Bible says? It says that we have natural bodies, and we have spiritual bodies. Our natural bodies are what we have on the outside.” She ruffled his hair. “Our hair, our eyes, our noses, our feet. Our arms and legs—all that important stuff. But what we have on the inside is even more important.”
He frowned. “Our guts?”
“Guts are important, too. But I’m talking about our spiritual body. We each have a spirit that lives on the inside, where no one can see. When a person dies, their natural body stops living but their spiritual body lives forever. So, the natural body turns to dust, but that’s OK, because the person can’t feel it. They aren’t in that body anymore. They are a spiritual body.”
He flipped through the pages.
“Can I hold it for a second? I’ll show you in the Bible where it says that.” Briar thumbed through the pages, searching for a verse Granna Grace read to her many times. 1 Corinthians, chapter 15, verse 44. If she remembered right, the last half of the verse reiterated what she’d explained to Gatlin, and was simple enough for his six-year-old mind to understand.
“Here it is.” She leaned over so he could follow her finger across the tiny page. “If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual body.” She closed the book and smiled. “See, we have two bodies. A natural body.” She wiggled her arms and legs. “And a spiritual body, inside.” She patted her chest. “Natural bodies can’t feel anymore when they die. But spiritual bodies never die.”
The Commandment Page 12
