“Why, thank you, Rabb.”
They were becoming fast friends as Amanda disappeared into the back bedroom. She had already stripped down to her undies when she heard a knock on the door.
“I’ll be another minute, Mrs. Caruso,” she said.
“It’s Rabb.”
Amanda felt a spurt of panic that he would walk in and catch her undressed and hurriedly pulled the gown over her head. But it had at least two dozen cloth buttons down the back, and there was no way she could do them up on her own.
“Mrs. Caruso got a long-distance call from her daughter,” Rabb said through the door. “She suggested I come back here and help you button up.”
Amanda gulped. Rabb seemed more the “help you to unbutton” type of guy. She wasn’t wearing a bra, because Mrs. Caruso had sewn one into the dress, and her back was completely bare. And since the dress was open below her waist, Rabb was going to get a good look at the lacy—quite unAmandalike—panties she had on.
“Mandy? You okay in there? Can I come in?”
Amanda clutched the bodice against her chest and said, “All right. Come in.”
He stopped in the open doorway and stared. “You’re beautiful,” he breathed. His golden eyes stayed focused on hers as he said, “I envy my brother.”
Amanda felt the heat on her cheeks. To avoid his hungry gaze, she turned her back on him. Still, she heard his indrawn breath.
“Good God, woman.”
She quickly turned back around and let go of the front of the gown to hold the back together. “I’m sorry. I should have waited for Mrs. Caruso.”
He shook his head. “I wouldn’t have missed this for...anything. Turn around. I’ll do up those buttons.”
She lowered her gaze and turned around, releasing the dress and letting her hands fall to her sides.
She heard the two steps he took on the hardwood floor to reach her. She felt a prickling along her back and knew he was devouring her with his eyes. She made herself stand still.
This was Jake’s brother. He was going to be her brother-in-law. They were going to be seeing a great deal of each other. He was observing nothing that wouldn’t have been exposed in a bathing suit at the river.
Except they were in a room alone with the door closed, and she was more than half undressed. And she knew he liked what he was seeing.
Maybe it was the novelty of being prized by a man for her looks. Jake had never told her she was beautiful. Had never admired her eyes or her figure. He had liked and respected her. Which was far more important. Wasn’t it?
But she hugged to herself the notion of being beautiful enough to make a grown man gasp. It was hard not to be thrilled by Rabb’s praise.
She could hear him wipe his hands on his jeans before reaching for the top button. His callused fingertips brushed her nape and she shivered.
“Sorry about that. My hands are still cold.”
Her shiver had nothing to do with the cold. She’d liked the feel of Rabb’s hands on her skin.
He blew on his fingers to warm them and started again. “These buttons are small,” he said. “I’m afraid I’m not as good at this as Mrs. Caruso would be.”
“Take your time,” she said. And then realized what he might imply from that. “I mean, I know the button loops are difficult to manage. Mrs. Caruso said it would...”
She stopped herself, realizing what she’d been about to admit. Mrs. Caruso had chuckled and said it would prolong her new husband’s—and her own—anticipation as he undid the buttons on her wedding night.
“I’ve got a pretty good idea what she said,” Rabb finished for her. “It isn’t hard to imagine the pleasure of undoing these buttons one by one—”
“Please don’t say any more.”
He didn’t. Until at last he said, “I’m finished. Turn around and let me see.”
She turned slowly, keeping her gaze focused on the ground, not wanting to see the look in his eyes.
“Damn it all to hell,” he muttered.
She looked up, surprised by the profanity. She saw anger and envy and anguish in his eyes.
“My brother is a very lucky man.”
“Thank you,” Amanda said. “Then you like it?”
She was embarrassed by the question, because it suggested she was fishing for compliments.
“You must know you’re stunning,” he said. “I’ve always thought so, ever since high school.”
She laughed at the absurdity of that. “I was flat-chested through most of high school.”
He grinned and said, “I noticed the change. But that wasn’t what I liked most about you.”
She tipped her head and stared at him. Curiosity prompted her to ask, “What did you like most?”
“Your smile. It never stayed only on your lips. I could see it deep in your eyes. I missed your smile that last year of high school.”
“I didn’t have much to smile about,” Amanda said softly.
“Your mother’s been gone for three years, Mandy. And your smile hasn’t come back.”
“I smile plenty,” she said.
“With your mouth,” he said. “But your eyes...they don’t smile or sparkle anymore. Why is that?”
A knock on the door interrupted them. “May I come in?”
Amanda hurried to the door and opened it for Mrs. Caruso. “I’m all buttoned up,” she said. She held her arms wide and turned in a circle for the seamstress. “What do you think?”
“I think there’s nothing more for me to do,” Mrs. Caruso said. The phone rang. “That’s my daughter again,” Mrs. Caruso said. “Would you mind helping Amanda get unbuttoned, Rabb?”
She didn’t wait for an answer, merely turned and left, closing the door behind her.
Amanda stared at Rabb with wary eyes. It had been bad enough having him button the dress. It would be torture standing still while he unbuttoned it...as Jake would on their wedding night.
“Would you rather I left?” Rabb asked, apparently aware of her distress.
“I’m being silly,” she mumbled. She turned her back to him and stood, her body taut, as Rabb began unbuttoning the gown.
She felt Rabb brush away the few curls at her nape so he could reach the topmost button. She could feel his knuckles brushing her bare flesh as he worked his way down her back.
He was halfway down her spine when he stopped. She angled her head around and said, “Is something wrong?”
“I can’t do this,” he muttered, taking a step back.
She turned and looked at his eyes. They were heavy-lidded with passion. She felt a stirring in her belly, a response to the avid look in his eyes.
“I wish... Jake is my brother,” he said, his voice curt. “If things were different...”
Amanda was shocked at what she was hearing, and it must have shown in her face because Rabb said, “Look, Mandy, I can’t control what I’m feeling. But I can damn sure control what I do about it. Be sure that Jake is the man you want. Because I don’t want to see either one of you hurt.”
“I love—”
“Don’t say anything,” he interrupted. “Mrs. Caruso can help you the rest of the way out of that dress.” He smiled crookedly at her. “I’m afraid I might not be able to keep my hands off you.”
Amanda stared at the empty doorway. She was confused. And unhappy. If Rabb was truly interested in her, why had he waited so long to say something? It was only two weeks before her wedding. She couldn’t possibly back out now, even if she found herself discovering new feelings for him.
Not that she had such feelings. She was flattered by Rabb’s compliments and attention. That was all it was.
It wouldn’t be fair to Jake to abandon him now, when he’d been loyal enough to wait three years for her to be ready for marriage. She
’d been willing enough to get engaged to him when she’d feared marriage had passed her by and she was going to end up an old maid.
And Jake was especially vulnerable. She knew his history. He’d already been dumped by one woman who’d told him he wasn’t what she wanted anymore. She didn’t think she could be that cruel.
But wouldn’t it be dishonest to marry him if her feelings had changed? Or rather, if she knew she had growing feelings for some other man? Especially when that other man was Jake’s brother?
Amanda had answered the call to duty all her adult life. It was very hard to turn her back on it now. She’d given up all hope of finding romantic love. She’d been ready to settle for liking and respect.
Rabb had changed all that.
She couldn’t understand how he’d slipped past all the roadblocks she’d set up against her feelings. She’d put love aside for duty years ago and had been content. But Rabb had robbed her of contentment. Now she wanted more. Now she yearned for...love.
Oh, God. What was she going to do? How could she turn her back on Jake and marry his brother? It couldn’t be done. Guilt and shame would kill love and prevent any chance of living happily ever after.
She had no choice. She had to crush the budding feelings she felt for Rabb. And follow through with her marriage to his brother.
She said nothing to Rabb until they were back in her car, the wedding gown wrapped in plastic and lying across the back seat. She reached for the key but didn’t start the engine.
“I can’t,” she murmured.
“Can’t what?” he asked.
She kept her eyes on her lap as she said, “I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to spend any more time together.”
“Because I have feelings for you?”
She turned to him, her eyes stark and said, “No. Because I have feelings for you.”
She saw his eyes flare with joy and rushed to cut it off. “They’re feelings I will never, ever act upon.”
“Why not?” he demanded.
“I’m going to marry your brother.”
Rabb frowned. “You’re not doing him any favors if you’re not in love with him.”
“I care for him. I respect him. I’ll make him a good wife.”
Rabb snorted. “That’s hardly the same thing.”
“I’ve committed myself to him. I owe him my fidelity. Unless he changes his mind—”
“You know he’s not going to do that,” Rabb shot back. “He’s as foolishly honorable as you are.”
“There’s nothing I can do,” she said. “I think it would be better if we don’t see each other again before the wedding.”
“Because you’re tempted? Because you might find yourself preferring me to my brother?” he said in a harsh voice.
She flushed. But didn’t answer him.
“All right, Mandy. I’ll keep my distance. But I want to give you something to think about.”
He caught her nape in his hand and held her captive as his mouth plundered hers. She was caught off guard by the sharp, exciting feelings that assaulted her. Feelings that had been absent when Jake kissed her. Rabb’s mouth lingered, inciting an ache deep inside. She wanted the kiss to go on and on, yet knew she had to end it.
She felt the tears brim in her eyes, felt the sudden knot in her throat. Felt the sting in her nose and fought against the sob that escaped anyway.
“Oh, my God, Mandy,” Rabb said, pulling her across the seat and into his lap, holding her tight. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
She sobbed against his shoulder, unsure what it was she grieved so bitterly. The lost years. Or the lost hope of love.
He caught a fistful of her hair in his hands and pulled her head back, his gaze tormented. “Promise me you’ll think between now and the wedding. Promise me you’ll give us a chance.”
“I can’t,” she sobbed. “I’m sorry, Rabb. I can’t!”
He set her back on the seat and smoothed her hair back from her face. She could tell he didn’t want to let her go. But in the end, he did.
“It’s not more than a mile back to your place,” he said. “I’ll walk.”
“At least let me—”
“I’ll walk,” he said, gripping her hands, which she only then realized had been laid on his chest. “Goodbye, Mandy.”
“Rabb—”
But he was already out of the car and headed down the street, the shearling coat pulled up around his ears, his body hunched against the cold, his hands thrust into his jeans pockets.
She wanted to call him back. Duty kept her silent and still. She would learn to love Jake. She owed him that.
CHAPTER FIVE
HOPE
HOPE HADN’T SEEN HIDE NOR HAIR of Jake in a week. He’d been hiding out at his ranch. She could feel the clock ticking. In eight days he would say his vows to Miss Carter and be lost to her forever. She couldn’t let that happen. She had to find some way to convince him to marry her instead.
Friday night supper was over, and Hope was lying on her bed, hands behind her head, jean-clad legs crossed at the ankle, thinking. Desperate circumstances called for desperate measures. Hope knew what she had to do. She just wasn’t sure she could go through with it.
She was going to seduce Jake Whitelaw.
Hope was certain that if Jake took her virginity, he would do the honorable thing and marry her. Unfortunately, seducing Jake meant acting dishonorably herself.
Jake treated his engagement seriously, and she knew he wouldn’t touch her without some significant provocation. She was equally sure, because sparks flew—hell, a bonfire raged—whenever they were together, that he could be incited to have sex with her. She wasn’t so sure he would be willing to forgive her afterward.
What if all he’d ever wanted was her body? What would happen when he’d slaked his appetite for her? What if she forced him into a marriage that would make both of them miserable?
She couldn’t afford to think about the consequences of what she was doing. She couldn’t afford to have second thoughts. She couldn’t afford to listen to her nagging conscience, which warned her she might be sorry later.
Her bedroom door opened, and Faith leaned in and said, “May I come in?”
“When did you ever have to ask?” Hope replied.
Faith crossed and sat on the bed beside her. “I’ve been worried about you.”
“Oh? Why is that?”
“You haven’t been your usual happy-go-lucky self lately.”
“I only have eight days left, Faith.”
“Then what are you doing here? Why don’t you go see Jake?”
“He’s staying at his ranch. And his housekeeper is living in because he’s got his niece and nephew with him. Frankly, it’s not a situation conducive to seduction.”
“Isn’t Mrs. Hernandez Jake’s housekeeper?” Faith asked.
“Uh-huh.”
“I don’t see how she could be at Jake’s house. I just talked to her daughter, Stephanie, on the phone. You remember, she was a good friend of mine through high school? Stephanie told me her mother is on her way to Eagle Pass.”
Hope sat bolt upright. “What?”
“It seems Mrs. Hernandez’s granddaughter has a bad cold and Stephanie is pregnant again and needs her mother’s help. So she begged her to come. And Mrs. Hernandez went.”
“Oh, my God,” Hope said. “That means Jake’s alone with those two babies.”
“Yep,” Faith said. “I wonder how he’s doing.”
“He’s probably going crazy. He probably—”
“Needs help?” Faith suggested.
“Of course he needs help,” Hope said, sliding off the bed and hunting for her boots. She tugged one on and then the other. “I’ve got to get over there.”
“Maybe you should call Miss Carter to go help him,” Faith said.
“Miss Carter’s busy getting ready for her wedding. I saw her car parked outside the florist shop this week. And at the bakery. And at the drugstore.”
“Was Rabb Whitelaw with her?” Faith asked.
“Rabb? Why would he be with her?”
“He’s been fixing her gazebo. I thought... Never mind,” Faith said. “So you’re going to offer to help baby-sit?”
“It’s the neighborly thing to do,” Hope said, rushing to her dresser and shoving a brush through her hair.
“Are you going to stay the night?” Faith asked.
Hope paused in midstroke and turned to face her sister. “Do you think I should?”
“I was going to suggest you stay the rest of the week, until Jake’s brother Colt and his wife Jenny return.”
Hope bit her lip. “You mean, offer to baby-sit for the whole week?”
Faith nodded. “Jake’s going to need help from someone. It might as well be you. And it’ll give you a chance to spend some time together, really get to know one another.”
Hope’s mind was racing. She thought of cowhide rugs and flickering fireplaces. It would be much easier to seduce Jake if she was spending the night. Seven nights.
“Maybe you should pack a few things before you go,” Faith said. “Just in case.”
Hope shook her head. “I couldn’t do that. It would look too much like I planned to come and stay. I wouldn’t want Jake to think—”
“It was only a thought,” Faith said.
Hope imagined not having a toothbrush. Or a comb. Or clean underwear for a week. And she did have that sexy black negligee she’d bought from Victoria’s Secret when she’d graduated from Baylor and knew she was coming home to Jake.
“All right,” she said. “Just a few things. But I’ll leave the bag outside until I’m sure he really wants my help.”
“Oh, he’s going to want it,” Faith said certainly. “With a rowdy two-year-old boy and a nine-month-old baby girl on his hands, he’s going to welcome you like a gift from heaven.”
“Oh, do you think so?” Hope couldn’t keep the wistfulness from her voice. Jake seemed completely self-reliant. It would be wonderful if he really needed her.
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