“Sure thing.” He lay back on the bed, his hands behind his head.
I could smell the strong, aromatic spice of his cologne coming up from the heat under his shirt, and I wanted to lie on his chest and sniff him. He was just so gorgeously human.
“You like human?” he said.
“Stay out of my head!” I slapped his chest, letting my hand fall down on the bed right by his ribs. In truth, I didn’t really want him to stay out of my head; I liked it. I missed when David used to be able to read my mind. Things had become so complicated since I had to explain my thoughts and emotions to him now.
“So, he can’t read your mind anymore—at all?”
I shook my head. “We were working on projecting thoughts, and I could sometimes read his mind”—when we were having sex—“but I can’t really control it yet.”
“Maybe I can help you.” He rubbed the side of my arm, rolling up a little. “I’m kind of an expert.”
“It’s not really that important.”
“Sounds like it is.”
I shrugged one shoulder, looking around his room. It had so much personality already, like he’d gathered things from his childhood and brought them here. There was a baseball glove and ball on his drawer top, his wallet on his nightstand, a gold-trimmed picture frame with a drawing of what I assumed was Arietta, and a pair of jeans, a shirt and two socks on the floor by the foot of his bed. It seemed like he was kind of untidy, like me. I glanced over at the stack of books on the wooden table by the fireplace, sitting under his Yankees cap, but couldn’t make out the titles on the spine. I wondered if he sat up late reading them, avoiding sleep—avoiding the nightmares.
“Hey, Jase?”
“Yeah.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure. Anything.”
“What are your nightmares about?”
“Anything but that,” he said dismissively, looking at the bedpost.
“Why?”
“I…” He shut his mouth and stayed quiet for a second. “I guess I don’t really want to let you in to that part of myself, Ara.”
“What part? And why?”
“I’m not really sure how to describe it.”
“Well, what, like, the deeper part of you—your emotional soft-spot?”
He laughed. “No, you’re already in there.”
“Well, can you try to explain it to me?” I touched his hand. “I actually just want to help.”
“You can’t help.”
“Why?”
“Because unless you can cure guilt, then I just have to let this run its course.”
“Guilt?” I closed my eyes, flashing back to that cell where he beat me and cut me open and did things I had scars from but no memory. “David said there were things on that list, Jase, that—”
“Ara, please?” He shut his eyes tight.
“No. I want to know.”
“To know what?”
“Did you erase anything… of what you—”
“Ara.” He held his hand up. “Don’t ask me that.”
“Why?”
“Because, if I lie, you’ll know, and if I tell you the truth, you’ll pester me for more information until I give in. And I can’t, sweet girl. I can’t tell you, and I find it really hard to resist you when you push me.”
“So, you did erase things?”
He shook his head to himself, angling his face to look away from me. My thoughts flashed to the scar I had on the base of my spine—the one Eric seemed to know something about but would never tell me—and with that came a flashback of the horrible dream that woke me last night.
“How did you see that?” He sat bolt upright, startling me with the sudden panic in his tone.
“See what?”
He grabbed my face. “That dream.”
“Dream? I asked, confused. “Oh, the one I had last night?”
“Yes.”
“I… I dreamed it, I guess,” I said sarcastically.
Jason sat back, staring into nothing.
“What?” I waved a hand in front of his face.
He shook it off, whatever it was, and smiled. “Arthur was a bit… uh, outspoken tonight.”
I laughed, letting him slink away to the land of dark secrets, concealing them for another day. “Yeah. What was with him?”
A few seconds of silence passed. “I’ve never seen him behave like that, you know?”
“Really?”
“Mm.” He rolled onto his side, softly tracing a strand of hair that fell down my back. “I don’t know what you said to him yesterday, Ara, but one thing I do know is that what you saw tonight wasn’t anger, it was heartbreak.”
“Don’t say that, Jase.” I sighed. “I feel really bad as is.”
“Don’t. He’s a grown man. He’ll get over it.”
“I don’t know if he will.” I shook my head. “I told him it’d make me sick to have sex with him.”
“Ouch.”
“I know. I didn’t mean it to sound so nasty.”
“Mm, well, I wouldn’t worry. For the sake of whatever his plan is, he’ll have to force himself to get over it.” He moved forward and lifted my arm, sliding under it so his head rested in my lap. “If you think he’s gonna drop this child thing just ’cause I’m here, you’re kidding yourself.”
I gently ground my teeth together. “Well, I better hurry and fall pregnant then.”
“You need my brother here for that,” he said, inching away from me as though I was going to jump on him and steal his seed.
“Ha-ha. Jerk.” I poked his upper arm. “I know. But, can you talk to him for me—to David? I can’t fall pregnant if he never comes to see me.”
“Yeah.” He smiled softly, his beautiful fangs showing under those perfect dark lips. “I’ll talk to him. I’ll threaten to impregnate you myself if he doesn’t.”
“Don’t do that. He might think you’re serious.”
“Who says I’m not?”
I rolled my eyes. “So, when are we going to announce our imaginary pregnancy?”
“When they believe we’re in love.” His grin set my heart ablaze, those fangs showing again, and without mind for territorial boundaries, I smoothed my thumb over his lip and touched it gently to his fang.
“You okay?” he asked, removing my hand.
“It’s been so long now since I’ve been bitten. Mike won’t let anyone bite me, or feed from me. I’m like a golden shrine.”
“Does he let you bite?”
“No. I have to get my vamp-immunity from approved veins, and even then, only through a pre-cut slit.”
“Mm. Appetizing.” He winced.
“It’s okay, I guess. I feed from Eric sometimes. And Lilithians don’t crave the bite like vampires do. Well”—I looked at his mouth again—“we’re not supposed to. I miss it, though, and I miss being bitten.”
He looked at my neck for a second too long, then let out a deep breath, focusing on the roof. “I wish we could share blood. But, before you freak out listing all the reasons we can’t, just know, not only can I not do it, but I wouldn’t.”
“Why?”
“Because there is no way I could resist going further with you.”
“Okay, so that’s the why, what’s the can’t?”
“I’m not immune. I don’t drink Lilithian blood.”
“Oh, right.” I whacked my own brow with the heel of my palm. “I forget you haven’t been here. Are you going to, though—be immune, I mean?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“I like knowing I can escape from life.”
“Death? Why would you want death?”
He distanced himself again with averted eyes and a long breath. “It doesn’t matter. Look, it’s getting late. I’ll walk you back to your room.”
“Jase?”
He stood up and appeared by his open door, not looking at me. “Come on. Mike’ll go crazy if he can’t find you.”
* * *
&nb
sp; I laid on my belly with my forearm under my chin, one fingertip in the cool pond, watching my reflection under the backdrop of a cloudy sky. The Garden of Lilith had a kind of presence to it, as if all life, all living things gathered here to celebrate the beauty of nature. And it was peaceful. Private. Secluded.
A frog jumped up from the water, sending ripples out in circles that grew and overlapped each other, stopping on the marble edge of the pond.
“Are you a prince?” I asked him. “Would you like a kiss?”
He croaked at me and hopped back into the water, and as I sat up and looked across the reflection, I thought I saw a child on the rope swing.
I spun around quickly to look at the tree. The leaves rustled in the soft warm breeze, and the swing rocked purposefully back and forth, but there was no child there. “Hello?”
No one answered.
When I looked at the pond again, the ripples were gone, leaving a definite image of a little girl in the reflection, swinging on the swing. But, sure enough, when I looked up, she was gone.
I got to my knees, leaning right over the water to focus on her, gasping when her eyes met mine. I jumped back, landing on my butt and hands in the grass, while a soft giggle trickled around the treetops then, following the child as she hopped off the swing and ran through the gates, out of the garden.
The clouds closed in above me, bringing the night sky with them, and a cool chill settled on the pond, making plumes of fog rise up off the surface in whorls. I got up and walked backward toward the gate, squealing when an ill-mannered crow yelled at me from the brick wall.
“What are you doing here?” I asked it.
It buried its beak in its wing, pulling something silver and long from within. I walked slowly toward it and held my hand out, looking up quickly when it dropped my silver key into my palm.
“That’s mine!” The little girl appeared beside me, snatching the key.
The crow cawed again, swooping at me as I covered my head.
When I looked up again, the girl was gone, the garden gone, the crow, everything.
I sat up in my bed and looked around.
The key.
On my dresser, the music box sung when I opened it and moved my treasures aside: David’s moonstone bangle, my coral earrings, my engagement ring and—phew, still there—my key. I closed my hand around it, feeling its warmth, then tucked it safely back in the box and closed the lid. But somewhere, maybe resonating from within that dream, I thought I could still hear that child giggling, like the sound was coming out of my fireplace again.
I shook the idea off quickly. If there were actually ghosts haunting this place, I was not going to go looking for them.
Outside, the sun was quite high in the sky, and despite today being Sunday it seemed odd that no one had come to wake me. I wandered over and looked out my window, seeing Jason down in the Garden of Strategy, running about with Petey and some old rag they were using as a chew toy.
He stopped as Petey ran off to fetch the cloth, and looked over his shoulder, right up at me. I waved; he waved back and went about his game.
He was a different kind of guy when he played with that dog, almost like a younger, freer version of himself. I liked that version—a little too much.
I turned away, shut my curtain and headed to get ready for the day.
* * *
Morgaine pulled a chair out next to her when I stepped in late to the council meeting. But, since learning she might be a traitor, I’d had a hard time feigning friendship, so I stood slightly behind her instead, pretending not to have noticed her gesture.
“It wouldn’t be a bad thing,” Quaid said. “At least then David can come home sometimes, since it’d explain the scent.”
“True,” Blade said.
“It’ll also explain a pregnancy if it ever happens,” Falcon added.
I realized then that they were discussing the idea of my relationship with Jason.
“I say we fake a pregnancy so we can crown David now. Why wait until Ara actually conceives?” Morgaine said.
“Hey, good idea, Morg,” Quaid said. “What do you guys think?”
“I’m okay with it,” Eric said, and it seemed everyone else agreed.
But not me, because it spoiled my plan to draw out Morgaine’s motives. I shrugged when they looked at me. “Works fine for me.”
“No,” Mike stated, standing taller. “It’s out of the question.”
“Mike,” David said through the phone. “They will force her to marry soon, and I can’t be back there yet to pose as Jason—”
“Why?” Mike cut David off. “All your reasons for being away make no sense, given current events, David. What’s really going on?”
Morgaine shifted in her chair, and I finally sat down.
“I’m with Mike on this one,” Eric said, looking at the phone. “How can we protect our queen and our nation if you’re keeping things from us?”
“It’s like I said.” Morgaine stood up. “What Margret or Walter or any of the Ancient Rune Readers have to say is irrelevant. Drake believes David to be the knight of the prophecy, and the only reason he didn’t attack before the coronation is because Ara might be powerful, but she is not worth a damn without that child.”
“I agree,” I said, though I didn’t agree. In truth, I knew David had things to hide, but I trusted him. After all, he was the one person who absolutely had my best interests at heart. So I’d help him keep those secrets for now, even if I didn’t know what they were. “David’s been busting his chops trying to find another Lilithian—trying to find Vampirie, and you guys have the audacity to question his motives.”
Everyone looked at me.
“He has nothing but our best interests at heart, and you would all do well to respect his decisions,” I finished.
“Right,” Morgaine said. “We stick to Plan A: get this prophecy child conceived and get David crowned under disguise of Jason.”
“And to do that, Jason has to be Ara’s husband,” Mike yelled. “They have to wed!”
“Not if she’s pregnant first,” Morg reasoned. “They don’t have to be married if he is king by right of heir.”
“But the child has to be born first, doesn’t it?” Quaid asked.
“Nope,” Blade said. “As long as it’s conceived, the father will have rights to be ruler.”
“Yes, which get revoked if the child dies,” Morg finished for him.
“Right. So, again, we’ll feign a pregnancy and crown David in Jason’s place,” I said simply. “Like we planned before you started debating this, Mike.”
Mike dropped his head against his fist. “Ara, you’re killing me.”
“We won’t really be together,” I said. “And it means David will inherit greater powers from the Stone, too. Who knows, maybe he and I can kill Drake together.”
Mike sat down.
“How long before we can announce a pregnancy?” Emily asked, her voice quieter through the phone than David’s had been.
“A month, maybe less. Better give it about that long, anyway, since Jason’s only just arrived,” David said. “I’m not sure how the people would react to an instant pregnancy.”
“Right.” Mike nodded, pushing off the table to stand up again. “A month then.”
“Good,” David said. I knew he was happy because that would give him a month longer to do whatever it was he was doing out there. But I was sad because it meant a month longer that he’d be gone—for reasons I knew nothing of.
“Okay then.” Morgaine clapped once, seemingly happy with all this. “Then Jason will officially be Ara’s new boyfriend.”
“Ara?” David said, his voice disappearing under the crappy connection.
“Yeah?”
“Take the phone somewhere private, please. I want to talk to you.”
I felt everyone’s eyes on me as I snatched it, then flew up the stairs to the Throne Room, switching it from loudspeaker to handset. “Hey, what’s up?” I said chirpily.
<
br /> “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For covering for me in there.” He paused. “I’ve been an absent husband—left you alone, yelled at you, confessed that I’m keeping things from you, yet you stepped up to support me despite that.”
I smiled to myself. “Well, what else would I do?”
“You just don’t know how much I appreciate that, especially since you don’t even know what you’re supporting.”
“I do, David. I’m supporting you. Whatever you decide, I know it’s always for the best. So you don’t have to be honest with me, yet, okay. You’ve got my one-hundred percent backing.”
He went quiet for a very long time.
“David?”
“Still here.”
“Are you okay?”
“I’ve missed it.”
“Missed what?”
“Seeing you grow up.”
My bottom lip pouted. “You think I’m grown up?”
He sighed. “My love, you have no idea how different you sound each time I talk to you, and it makes me so happy to see you becoming the woman I always knew you were—deep down inside.”
“Really deep down?” I suggested, laughing.
“Well, the past doesn’t matter now. I’m so proud of you, and I can’t even begin to tell you what your support means to me.”
“Well, I love you, David. I trust you.”
“I love you too, Ara. And I always will. No matter where I am or how long we’re apart—I will love you in this life and the next.”
“The next?” I laughed. “We don’t get an afterlife.”
He cleared his throat. “With immortality, we live many lifetimes, and in that, we change our lives. That’s what I meant.”
“Oh, okay.” I smiled, frowning as well, because none of that made sense. “Well, I look forward to thousands of lifetimes with you.”
“As do I,” he said and hung up the phone. I stared at it for a second, turning around when my council came out from an adjourned meeting. “Anything interesting happen while I wasn’t there?” I asked Mike.
He snatched the phone, then took my hand. “Yes. I’m taking you down to see the new Immortal Damned house.”
“Really?” I grinned up at him. “It’s finished?”
Dark Secrets Box Set Page 181
