by K. S. Adkins
Unaware of who they were provoking, they both continued to laugh as they walked away. Stepping into her trailer, I see her staples there, nothing was out of place except that she had a fresh pot of coffee that was never poured and she’d left her key on the table. And I was on the second step out when Walter cut me off with, “He set her up.”
“Who?”
“Talon, for sure, but probably Silas too, the pussy is always sniffing around her. He isn't pulling the numbers he used to and needs Finn.”
“What’s this about a sex tape?” I ask, and in that moment, I wanted to kill so badly I ached.
“All I know is after bringing the asshole into the business, he did a shit job of actually doing his job then Talon cheated on her so she fired him. He didn’t like that much since he can’t secure another job now so he threatened to expose the tape if she didn’t give him his job back. Except that he leaked the tape before he even showed up here.”
“I see,” I say calmly when I was anything but.
“What I see is a man who exists in a world people like me get paid to pretend we’re a part of. That being said, real life is far more bloody than any movie set I’ve ever worked on.”
“It is,” I agree.
“Then for Finn, I hope you bleed Talon like a pig. And once his blood dries up, I would suggest you slit Silas from ear to ear too.”
And then Walter lumbered off. Finn would be proud to know that by one deed, Walter removed himself from my kill list.
Leaving set, I drove for hours racking my brain trying to put myself in her shoes. If I was home in Detroit and I lived for the next thrill, where would I go? Hell, where would I go to grieve? Oddly enough, after coming up empty, I called the Operator for help. Apparently, Finn was curing me of my issues with comfort zones.
“The hunter can’t find his prey?” she says in answer.
“She’s in danger when she’s not with me, Operator.”
“The way I see it, she’s in danger regardless, Phoenix.”
“Are you tracking her?”
“If I were, which isn’t to say I’m not, I would put her at The Academy of Martial Arts. By the way, I don't like seeing her sad. Fix it, Phoenix.”
And then she disconnected.
Finally locating the building, I parked down the street and walked over to find Finn watching a class from the window outside. Taking her right, I was about to ask her if she was okay when she asks, “Have you seen it?”
“No,” I answer honestly.
“In Hollywood, this would solidify a male’s career, but a female’s…”
“This isn’t your fault.”
Facing me, she whispers, “In this business, hell, in any business, all you have is your word and your actions. They won’t remember me as the fearless stuntwoman who paved the way for others. They will remember that I fucked my PR rep on camera.”
“They don’t fucking matter, Finn.” I argue as gently as possible.
“But they do, Nix. When you’re the first at anything, it means you’re the first to fall, fail and are held to a different standard. You know this better than anyone. I’m not the first female stuntwoman. But I am the first to gain even a small amount of celebrity. Being the first paints a target on your back. It makes people hate you and plot against you. Even those closest to you. Mothers aren’t going to encourage their daughters to be like me now. They’ll encourage them to be anything but me. Preaching to little girls that you had to fight, hustle and practice to be the best has been for nothing. Because my credibility is shot. They won’t look up to me anymore because for them, I’m a liar who fucked her way to the top. Finn Lee isn’t a stunt woman. She’s a fucking porn star.”
“Let me fix this,” I urge her.
With the saddest eyes she says, “Until you, I didn’t even like sex. I didn't know how.”
Cupping her cheek, I promise her, “Until you, I didn’t like living. I didn't know how.”
Throwing herself into my arms, Finn allowed me to carry her away.
It was rare that Ryan and I fought but when we did it was usually about Talon.
And it wasn’t that Ryan was wrong, it’s just that I couldn’t prove he was right either. Plus, Talon was under contract and I couldn’t fire him for no good reason. As much as I found it appealing, I wasn’t a fan of lawsuits, which is exactly what he’d do if I let him go without cause. He was slimy like that. Though, that was a side of him I hadn’t met until recently. So when Ryan said, “I know the business, Finn. Even better than that fucker does. Plus, you know I’ll always put your best interest first. We’re a team.” I smiled.
“Consider him gone.” I vowed to ditch the asshole at the earliest opportunity. “Why didn’t we do this sooner?”
“Because we were learning, Finn.”
I woke up with puffy eyes, a dry mouth, and Nix’s hand between my legs. It was safe to say the warmth he found there made him feel safe. Which made me wonder in his world if he ever felt safe?
Curling into him, happy to watch him sleep, I didn’t move an inch. Somewhere between my meltdown and possible blackout, he’d brought me back to my room and tucked me in, and no one had ever done that for me before.
When he opens his eyes and catches me staring, his face softens and he says, “Hi, Finn.”
“Hi, Nix,” I reply running my fingers over his ridged stomach. When he notices our position, he grins unashamed and says, “What? I was hopeful.”
“For the guy who paid for sex, you sure are good at spooning.”
“How do you feel about forking?”
And since I had given it a lot of thought, I asked, “How do you feel about a partner?”
When he stiffened, I almost called the words back but then decided, fuck it and went for broke. “I won’t last long without you, Nix and I’m not ready to cash in yet. So, the logical answer is partnering up. Teach me everything you know and trust me to have your back. I can do it, I know I can.”
“How old are you?”
“Twenty-six, stop deflecting.”
“I’m thirty-one, Finn.”
“And?”
“And I haven’t seen my parents in over fifteen years.”
“What does that have to do with – "
“They told me not to come home until I had done something to be proud of and what does it tell you when I haven’t gone back?”
“So, we go our separate ways? Is that it?”
“Yes, no. I don’t fucking know, Finn,” he groans closing his eyes. “Look, I’m going to make you a promise and I need you to tell me you understand and that you’ll wait until I come for you.”
“I need to hear the promise first.”
“I need you to lay low while I tie up loose ends.”
“Sure,” I lie because, no fucking way. Did he not just hear my speech?
“Really?”
“I quit my job, Nix. Time is all I’ve got.”
Kissing me hard he says, “Thank you, Finn,” against my lips.
“When are you leaving?”
“After I fuck you into the mattress.”
“Something to remember you by,” I grin lowering the sheet. “I like it.”
Properly sated and feeling liquid, Nix breaks the spell when he places a gun in my palm instructing me to, “Take this, use it if you have to. Do not leave this room until I call.”
I reply with, “Okay, Nix,” thinking it was cute he thought he could ditch me and I’d obey. He wasn’t gone a full minute when I was out of bed throwing clothes on.
Searching for my keys and not having any luck, I call valet and was told that at the moment my car wasn't in the lot. His vague answers were not making me happy. Way to avoid fallout, asshole... So when my phone rang, I didn’t bother checking the screen. Swiping it in answer I threaten, “For stealing my car, I’m cutting your balls off.”
“Well, hello to you too,” she says cheerily. “Phoenix is misbehaving?”
“How much do I get if I kill him?” I ask the Ope
rator.
“Maybe you should head over to the entrance of the Packard Plant while I think on it.”
“Are we best friends now?”
“I wouldn’t test that theory.”
“Funny,” I say heading for the door. “I was about to say the same to you.”
“I like you, Finn Lee.”
Slamming the door behind me, I wrap up my call with, “Bite me, Operator,” and hit the steps.
Phoenix and I had ourselves a situation.
Standing over my first kills, I stared at the unmoving men wondering when the panic or remorse would set in.
No stranger to hustling, lying, and blackmailing, the step up to cold-blooded murder I assumed would leave me feeling something. Even after the devil swore me in, I went back to the bodies and stared a little longer.
That day I could admit I felt two things.
Indifference was the first and wondering when I could do it again was the second.
I’ve done a lot of questionable shit in my life but stealing her car so she couldn’t follow was low even for me.
I didn't need her car though, it was leagues above my rental.
But, I couldn’t risk it because I saw it in her eyes; she’d follow.
It was the middle of the night when my phone alerted me to a message from Corbin demanding a meeting. Over the years, our numbers have grown and what started as a dozen of us morphed into over one hundred world-wide. But that original dozen operated mainly out of the United States. Being the first, I had a say in recruiting and after training the original twelve, I stepped back.
So, Corbin came after and while I didn’t know much about him, what I did know, I didn’t much care for.
Middle Men didn’t kill for the sake of killing. There was a greater purpose behind it, even if we weren’t privy to what that purpose was.
Parking at the Packard Plant, I stared at my phone fighting the urge to call Finn.
But when Corbin walked up, I tucked my phone under the seat needing to focus on the evil in front of me.
Stepping out, my first question was, “Where’s the guard?”
Because this place was always under surveillance for reasons just like this one.
“Handled,” was Corbin’s reply. Great, now the asshole was killing innocents. “Nice car, yours?”
“I’m here, what do you want?”
“What I want is to know how you could forsake the brotherhood you helped to build, for a female.”
“If falling in love is seen as a crime, I’m not sure I give a fuck about the brotherhood.”
“Where is she, Phoenix?”
“Safe.”
Grinning in a way I did not like, Corbin raises his brow asking, “Are you sure about that?”
Following his line of sight, I could not fucking believe what I was seeing.
“Fuck,” I mumble, ready to cut Corbin down where he stood.
“Relax, Phoenix,” he chuckles. “I’d really like to meet her.”
One thing I will say about the asshole, he wasn’t a liar.
Stomping straight up to me, Finn gets in my face growling, “You stole my car.”
“Yes,” I struggle not to laugh. “Because I was hoping to avoid this.”
“You stole my car,” she repeats.
“And you thought riding a bicycle was the way to go?”
Ignoring Corbin’s cough, she sticks her finger into my chest warning, “It took me twenty-seven minutes to ride that stolen hunk of shit over here.”
“You’re not even winded.”
“The next time you want to fuck me into compliance thinking I’ll sleep it off, you may want to consider public transportation. I’m not happy you stole my car, Nix. I have a thing about cars!”
“Can we fight about this later?” I ask waving my arm to show an amused Corbin.
As if she just realized we weren’t alone she huffs, “I’m Finn, and you are?”
“Corbin,” he nods cordially.
“You here to kill me?” she asks unfazed by the danger in front of her. “Because if you are, I brought the gun he left me and I'm just pissed enough to shoot him before I end you.”
“If I was, you just made it much easier,” he grins at my situation.
“Tell you what,” she says snagging her keys from my hand and speaking to Corbin. “Let me dump this asshole here and then we can talk.”
Seeing red, I growl, “Dump me?”
“You played me,” she says with sass. “And maybe you are a super-secret bad ass but it’s obvious you’re a shit boyfriend.”
“Finn,” I warn reaching for her but she quickly steps away.
“The damage is done, Nix. You claimed to have walked away, for me. So, what the fuck is this all about?”
“I am trying to keep you safe,” I remind her.
“Wrong,” she snaps. “What you’re doing is disappointing me. You know what? I do deserve better than this.”
Turning away from me she heads toward her car and taking her elbow, I ask, “Where the fuck are you going?”
Breaking free she says, “It doesn’t matter, Nix.” Eyeing Corbin and then myself she leaves me with, “You’re welcome to use the bike.”
Peeling out and leaving me with what very well could be my enemy at my back, I watched as her car took her further and further away.
“If you’re going to kill me, do it now,” I mutter in shame.
Taking my left, Corbin nudges me and says, “Naw, it’s no fun when you won’t even feel the bullet.”
Dropping my shoulders, I don’t even bother to respond. Tucking his gun into his holster he surprises me by saying, “Her name is Jordyn.” Meeting his eyes, I see the pain and longing there. “I was put on this earth to love her, Phoenix. And because I didn’t believe a future was possible, I let her go. For three years I’ve watched her from afar, fucking watched another man step in to take my place too. I swear she’s still waiting for me but, I don’t know how much longer she’ll hold out. You have to finish this. For yourself, for all of us. I wish I could stay and help you, but I have to go to her.”
“Go,” I nod to Corbin. “I’ll handle it.”
“Good luck to you, Phoenix. My friend.”
Eyeing the bicycle Finn left behind, I grin at the woman who owns me heart and soul.
And I hoped she enjoyed being spanked because that’s what she had coming for making me pedal a fucking bike with rims on it.
Eyeing my Kristen Ashley novel, Ryan teased, “You are such a sucker for romance.”
“I am not,” I snorted. PS: I totally was.
Flipping the pages, he pretended to read by gasping and fanning himself. But when he set it down, all traces of humor were gone. “You deserve it, you know.”
“What?”
“Romance, hearts and flowers. You deserve the royal treatment.”
“And you don’t?”
“Finn,” he grinned shyly. “When I find her, I’ll happily do all of it.”
Whoever she turned out to be, was one lucky woman.
Oh yes, I was royally pissed off.
Which was never good for the person I was pissed off at.
While I preferred letting shit roll off my back, this shit was sticking. I was covered in shit and I did not like it.
Not only did he leave me, he stole my fucking car so I couldn’t follow too.
I had stolen a fucking bike with twenty-two-inch rims on it for fuck’s sake! Then he had the nerve, the-actual-fucking-nerve, to snicker at me?
In front of company no less!
Phoenix no last name, soon to have no balls, still thinks I needed protecting. I wasn’t his equal, I was his fucking secret. And the thing about secrets?
They’re rarely kept and I am no exception.
Grabbing my phone and hitting ‘O’, I wasn’t surprised when she answered. In fact, I was counting on it.
Clearly, the bitch hacked my phone too…
How these bird men didn't question her tactics was beyond
me. Killers weren't stupid. Okay, clearly Nix was but, I digress...
I was in a mood and really wanted to hate her, but I wasn’t built for hate.
Righteous anger, yes. But hate? Not so much. But I could bedazzle the shit out of some revenge.
Plus, she was the lone female surviving in a man’s world and I understood that better than most.
“Kitty cat!”
“Excuse me?”
“Phoenix has you in his contacts as Kitten, I thought it was sweet. Never mind…How can I be of service?”
“I'm thinking about dumping Nix,” I announce. “If I do does that mean the price on my head goes away?”
“You're thinking about dumping Phoenix?”
“Why do you sound disappointed?”
“Because I am,” she snaps. “You can’t dump him just for wanting to protect you.”
“Sure I can,” I counter rationally.
“Fix what you broke or I double the price on your pretty head.”
“You do know I’m not afraid of you, right?”
Sighing she says, “I know and can I just say, it’s annoying? Plus, let’s be real. You’re cute and bendy but you are not worth twenty large.”
“You left out vengeful and pissed off.”
“Can I tell you something, woman to woman?”
“You can tell me anything you want, I’m not one of you.”
“Yet,” she adds cryptically.
“Whatever,” I roll my eyes. “Get to the point.”
“Phoenix has never known romantic love and I…want that for him.”
“Why?”
“As the first, he was the guinea pig, I suppose, and while he’s the best and my favorite for various reasons, he needs your love, Finn.”
“If I don’t die first.”
“There is that,” she says softly. “For what it’s worth, I’m rooting for you.”
When the air shifted and I turn to find Nix standing at the door sweaty, breathing heavy, so I end the call with, “We are not best friends now.”
And I swore I heard her say, “Oh, yes we are,” before I disconnected.
Tossing the phone over my shoulder, I cross my arms and glare at my possibly soon to be ex.
