Excommunication! So it has come to that? Should I ask the reason? Even as she debated whether she should ask the words came out: “What did Ivan do that warrants possible excommunication and threatens damnation of his soul?” She knew her voice sounded angry—and rightfully so. The situation was so unfair.
“You must not speak in such a tone,” Noah said, his voice a gentle reprimand. “I know you are not promised to him—or so we expect. You must withdraw yourself from the man. And this is not damnation. It is correction of the soul. Sometimes a man can only be reached by that method, and you know the Lord Himself has so ordained it.”
“What did Ivan do? That’s all I want to know. All I’ve heard are a bunch of trumped-up charges to break the two of us up.”
“I hoped you wouldn’t take this so hard,” Noah said. “I was afraid you would though. I do believe, Ella, there is cause enough that you must cut off contact with Ivan. I wish I weren’t the one telling you this, but the truth is that Ivan has been seen entering the Baptist church in town—accompanied by an Englisha woman.”
“Ivan confessed to this?” Ella was barely able to get the words out.
“Nee, and that is the sad part. He refuses to speak of the matter. He refuses to repent or give a reason why he would do this. This grieves us all greatly.”
“And is this in any way related to Clara’s drawings?”
Noah’s voice was heavy. “In times like this, when one of our own ministers falls so deeply into sin as Ivan has, we must be extra careful.
It causes us to examine our hearts and all our actions. Clara’s drawings were always a little in question, and I feel now like no chances should be taken.”
“Oh, this is all Bishop Miller’s fault!” Ella exclaimed.
“You may not think highly of the man right now,” Noah said, speaking slowly. “But perhaps after this you can see that you made a mistake in your judgment of him. He would be a much, much better choice for a husband than Ivan, Ella. That has become obvious. And after this is all over, I believe there would still be time to make things right with him. If you like, I would be willing to speak to him on the matter.”
“Did Bishop Miller tell you to give me that message?”
Her mamm quickly placed her hand on Ella’s shoulder. “You must not be bitter with the bishop.”
“Then he did?”
Noah shook his head. “No, it’s only my idea and suggestion. I have always respected the man, as you know. I am speaking as your daett.”
Ella lifted her face toward the ceiling before burying her head in her hands. Great sobs racked her body. The day—and the whole world—had fallen around her with a mighty crash.
Twenty-nine
I don’t believe it!” Ella whispered through her mamm’s soaked handkerchief.
“You’ve always been a faithful soul,” Noah said, his voice gentle. “But this time you must not let your loyalty blind your eyes.”
“When Ivan tells me, perhaps then I’ll believe it.” Ella raised her tear-stained face to look at her daett. She glanced nervously toward the living room. No sound was coming from there, so hopefully Dora and Clara had taken the girls upstairs. She felt the tears burn again and allowed them to flow freely.
“Then one would hope Ivan tells you the truth,” Noah said. “He has not been honest so far. Bishop Hochstetler told us so. Ivan would not bare his soul when he was approached.”
“Perhaps it’s because of his pain,” Ella said, meeting her daett’s eyes. “Has anyone thought of that? He loved his wife greatly, and now he has to go on without her. I know a little bit about that myself. I can understand the pain.”
“Yet he has asked you to be his wife…hasn’t he?” Noah questioned, trying to be gentle but anger was in his voice.
“Yah,” Ella said. “And I’ve been thinking about saying yes. Is there a sin in that? Is that a reason for Bishop Miller to persecute him in this way?”
Lizzie brushed her daughter’s forehead.
“I think you have seriously misjudged the bishop,” Noah said. “Bishop Miller has done none of this out of spite or revenge. I see you think so, and that is why your heart is so set against him. But I pray that you see your mistake. Bishop Miller is a man of God, one like we haven’t had in my time. He would make a great husband for you.”
“I know you think so,” Ella said, swallowing hard. “Yet it is I who would have to wed him…and I cannot. Not even if my relationship with Ivan were to be broken.”
“It will be broken if Ivan is excommunicated.” Noah rose to his feet. He paused and put his hand on Ella’s shoulder. “You must consider the evidence, Ella, before you give your answer to Ivan. Such a mistake would be too costly.”
As he turned to go he said, “The chores beckon me. There is much extra work to do since Eli is gone. The pain from his choice has hurt us all. I cannot lose another child to the world. Surely you would not consider following Ivan in his fallen ways?”
Ella met his eyes, seeing the depth of his concern and the burden he had already suffered, and pressed back her tears. “I have no plans to join the Englisha nor does Ivan. I wish you would believe that.”
“Yah, we know you believe so,” Lizzie said, stroking Ella’s forehead again and offering a fresh handkerchief.
“Then my heart is some lighter.” Noah sighed. “At least about you. Ivan…I will leave him to the leaders to address. I trust their judgment more than I do even your opinion, Ella. You are too close to see clearly. You must also trust our leaders more than your own mind. Da Hah works in these ways. As the Good Book says, it was Eve who got herself deceived in the garden.”
Ella felt the anger rising again, but their love had disarmed her. “I will not marry Bishop Miller,” she said weakly. “Not if I must remain single all my life.”
“No man can change a woman’s heart, I suppose,” Noah said, sighing again. “I wish I could, but we must live with what happens. If you do not join the Englisha, then I will be satisfied.”
“I won’t,” Ella said.
What would her daett think if he knew about Robert Hayes and her troublesome feelings for him? His heart—and Mamm’s—would surely break to pieces if they knew hers had gone after an Englisha man. Fear gripped her, even as her father looked at her with relief on his face.
“I see the fear of Da Hah is still with you,” he said, reaching for her hand, a slight smile on his face.
“I will try,” Ella whispered. She almost cried when he smiled.
“I know you will,” Noah replied, touching her shoulder gently. “You bring joy to my heart.”
When the outside door shut behind Noah, Lizzie said, “Eli has broken his heart. It would simply be too much if another of his children followed the world.”
Fear came again as Ella remembered afresh the look of Robert’s face. She knew she had no control over her emotions. They were what they were. Nee, she would never follow him into the world—even if Ivan was taken from her. That she could control, if not the wild beating of her heart.
“Come now. We must speak of other things,” Lizzie said, trying to smile.
Ella wiped her eyes. Perhaps the storm was over for now. “But Clara,” she said, remembering. “Can she still do the drawings? Now that you have spoken with me?”
Lizzie shook her head, “Noah will not allow it. Not with things as unsettled as they are.”
“But you can persuade him! Tell him it’s not Clara’s fault. Speak to him.”
Lizzie lowered her eyes. “You must not blame your daett. I also question the wisdom of allowing Clara this diversion. We have lost one child, and we cannot afford to lose another.”
“But Clara has taken this so hard,” Ella said. “I saw the look on her face.”
“We cannot shield Clara from all of life’s pains,” Lizzie said. “Only some of them. And this one, Clara must learn to live with.”
“Perhaps, then, she can at least come home with me today. Get away from things for a while. I would love tha
t, and it’s been so long since I’ve seen her.”
“How will she come back tomorrow?” Lizzie asked.
“I can bring her back.”
Lizzie considered for a moment. “I know a better way. Yah, you can take her with you, but I’ll come for her tomorrow after I’ve helped Dora with the first chores. I’ve so wanted to see your place again. So why don’t we tell Clara?” Lizzie walked into the living room to holler up the stairs and ask the girls to come down. Quick steps followed her request.
“Oh, Mamm, that’s a good idea,” Ella said as she followed her mamm.
Dora appeared first, baby Barbara in her arms. She glanced cautiously through the stair door, smiling when she saw Ella.
“The storm is over then?” Dora asked, coming down the steps. Clara followed with Mary and Sarah.
“Clara, how would you like to spend the night at Ella’s?” Lizzie asked.
Clara’s eyes got big. “To Ella’s place? I would love to!”
“Then run up and pack,” Lizzie said, motioning with her hand. “Ella hasn’t got all day.”
“Oh, Mamm!” Clara shrieked, disappearing up the stairs to Mary and Sarah’s astonished looks.
“They must not be used to seeing women who dash around like Clara does,” Lizzie said with a laugh.
As soon as her mamm was gone, Dora approached Ella and whispered, “So what happened?”
“Let’s go upstairs to talk,” Ella said.
Dora nodded.
“Mamm, we’re going up to my old room until Clara’s ready,” Ella yelled toward the kitchen.
“Then leave the girls down here,” Lizzie said. “I’ll watch them.”
“We’ll be back soon,” Ella said to Mary and Sarah. She set baby Barbara on the floor. They looked contented and fascinated enough with the new surroundings to stay quiet for a few more minutes.
Ella’s old bedroom looked much the same, though Dora had moved in and made some changes. The dresser had a new doily and a different patterned quilt covered the bed.
“Let’s sit on the bed,” Dora said. “It’ll be just like old times.”
Ella sat down, remembering the years she had spent here. It seemed like ages ago…back in Aden’s time…in a world she would never inhabit again.
“So what’s up?” Dora asked, her face full of questions.
“A whole bunch of rumors about Ivan,” Ella said and then gave the details, along with her opinion.
“Do you think he’ll get excommunicated?” Dora asked with a frown.
“He will unless someone stops Bishop Miller.”
Dora laughed, “You don’t really think he’s doin’ this just to break you two up, do you?”
“Yah,” Ella said, “I do.”
“You sound like me,” Dora said. “I’m the one who would think such dark things.”
“Well, this time it’s me,” Ella retorted.
Should she tell Dora about Robert? Nee, she would not. There was too great a chance Dora would tell Mamm. Robert would be gone soon enough, and there was no sense adding extra worry to her parents’ already burdened minds.
“So what do you think will happen?” Dora asked.
“Ivan will figure some way out of this,” Ella said. “He won’t be excommunicated. And if it comes to that, I’ll help him any way I can.”
Dora laughed. “You take too much on yourself, Ella. You always have. But this time I think you’re whipped. Especially if Ivan really did go to the Baptist church in town. With or without a woman…”
“I don’t believe it for a minute!”
“My, you are so sure,” Dora said with raised eyebrows.
“Now, let’s talk about something else,” Ella said. “Tell me about Norman. Is the wedding still on for next year?”
“Yah,” Dora said. “It seems so.”
“You sure are cheerful about it,” Ella said wryly.
“I guess love does me gut,” Dora said with a short laugh. “I never thought I would say that.”
“I always knew it would happen sometime,” Ella said.
“I wish it would happen to you again,” her sister asserted.
“Dora…” Ella’s eyes suddenly brimmed with tears. Perhaps her feelings for the Englisha man would come out after all.
But then Dora spoke again. “I know you haven’t found it yet. Not like what you had with Aden.”
“Perhaps real love comes only once in a lifetime,” Ella whispered.
Dora hugged Ella. “Oh my, how I wish it would happen for you again. You so deserve it, Ella.”
“I don’t,” Ella said, her voice catching. “You don’t know everything about me.”
“I know all I need to know,” Dora said, letting her go slowly. “Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”
“I’m ready to go!” Clara called loudly from outside the bedroom door. “You two old chickens can cackle later.”
Ella gave Dora one last hug, and they walked out together.
“Why are you two crying?” Clara asked. “I’m the one who can’t draw anymore.”
“You’ll cry someday over bigger things than pictures,” Dora said dryly.
“Ella, hurry. Please get me out of this place of darkness, at least for a while,” Clara said as she raced down the stairs with her suitcase.
Ella followed, laughing; Dora behind them grumbling all the way.
Thirty
The early afternoon air had chilled. Ella pulled the buggy blanket up around the little girls’ chests before pulling out onto the lane.
Mary piped up from her seat on the floor. “I’m glad you could come with us, Clara. I can show you my doll.”
“I have one too,” Sarah echoed.
Clara laughed. “I’d like to see them very much,” she said, exchanging smiles with Ella.
“I’m glad you’re coming too,” Ella said. “It’s been so long.”
“Yah,” Clara said. “And the change of scenery will do me good.”
Just ahead Ella saw the wooden pay phone shack standing in stark relief against the white snow. She’d been watching for it. She pulled to a stop and said, “I’m going to call Eli, Clara.”
Clara gave her a questioning look but said nothing. She took the reins as Ella stepped down.
Finding several quarters in her pocketbook and hoping they would be enough, Ella picked up the phone book. She noted the date on the phone book and realized it was too old. Eli’s number wouldn’t be listed in it. Hopefully information would have the number.
“Yes,” the operator said in response to her query. “There is an Eli Yoder in Randolph. That’s the only one we have.”
“That must be it,” Ella said, grabbing the pencil that hung by a string on the wall. She scribbled quickly on a scrap of paper as the operator intoned the number.
Taking a deep breath, Ella dropped in more quarters and dialed. The phone rang several times. She was ready to hang up when a sleepy voice finally answered.
“Hello,” she said, finding her voice. “Eli?”
“Yah,” he said. “Who is this?”
“It’s Ella.” She waited for his response.
“It’s nice to hear from you, Ella. Is something wrong? Is it Daett or Mamm?”
“No, Daett is fine. So is Mamm. It’s about something else. Can you come out to my house sometime when it suits you? I’d so love to see you.”
“Does it have to do with me returning to the Amish?” His voice had an edge.
“No, Eli. I miss you.”
“Then perhaps I can come,” Eli said, his voice relaxing.
“This afternoon?” Ella asked.
“I’ll be there,” Eli said. “It will do me good to see someone from the old life.”
“You’ll see Clara too. She’s visiting.”
“Great!” Eli said. “I’ll be by later then.”
Ella hung up and returned to the buggy. She climbed in and took the reins from Clara.
“Did you get ahold of him?” Clara asked.
&
nbsp; Ella nodded. “He’s coming by this afternoon. Does he ever come out to the farm?”
“Sometimes, but not often. Daett always comes in from the barn when he visits. He doesn’t want Mamm to be alone with him. They sit at the kitchen table talking.”
“It will be gut to see him,” Ella said as she drove the buggy back out on the road.
“Just don’t give him anything to eat,” Clara said.
“Why shouldn’t I offer him food?”
“I just wouldn’t,” Clara said, shaking her head. “I don’t know how it all works, but if Daett finds out you’ve had Eli over and had him in to eat, well, I wouldn’t want to be around then. You might never be allowed back home.”
“Really, Clara. I think you’re exaggerating. But okay, we won’t offer him any food.”
“Don’t say we,” Clara said. “Keep me out of it. It’s bad enough that I can’t make my drawings anymore. I wish people would stop getting themselves in trouble with the bishops.”
“You can say that again!” Ella said, her voice tinged with bitterness.
The creek bottom was cold, and Ella drove fast, anxious to get home. She slapped the lines as they turned up Chapman Road and approached the white house.
Clara gasped when it came into full view. “Ever since the first night I spent here, I’ve loved this place.”
“So have I,” Ella said, allowing herself to get caught up in the moment. “So have I.” She turned into the driveway and parked by the barn. Giving Clara the reins, she jumped down to help the little girls. She and Clara unhitched together, and then Clara held Barbara and waited with the two girls while Ella led Moonbeam into the barn. She urged him on, “Remember, oats lie straight ahead.”
He neighed as if his faith in womankind had been restored and increased his pace. After she pulled the harness off and put him in the stall, she gave him a large bucket of oats. He chomped greedily.
“Mind your manners!” she said with a laugh as she left. She shut the barn door tightly behind her. From the looks of things, the wind might be wild tonight, and the barn was cold enough without the door springing open.
Ella Finds Love Again (Little Valley 3) Page 18
