by L. P. Dover
He breathes a sigh of relief and smiles. "That's all I needed to hear." His eyes search mine. "There's so much I want to know about you. Do you mind if I take you out tomorrow? There's a place I think you'll like. Plus, it'll give us time to get to know each other."
Excitement bubbles in my veins. "I'd love to." Satisfied with my answer, he steps out of my way, and we continue our walk. I look up at him, and he looks at me. "I need to ask you a question."
His eyes narrow curiously. "Anything."
"Does it bother you that I can't shift? I'm not like all the other girls in the pack. Things might not work the same for us."
Cedric shakes his head. "I don't care. All I know is that I'm right where I want to be, and I'll do anything to make this work."
I've never had this happen before, but his response makes everything inside of me tighten. I want to move closer to him, to feel his touch again, but I keep my distance. "I guess we'll see what happens then."
Eleven
Laila
Amelie finished her training early with Sebastian and Micah so she could get to her job. Right now, it's just Faith and me battling it out with my uncles. Sebastian is in human form since I can't shift while Micah and Faith stalk toward each other, both magnificent white wolves. Micah is a lot bigger, but when Faith snarls with those long fangs of hers, I find myself mesmerized and a tad envious. I would look like her if I could shift.
"All right, Laila, let's go for a run," Sebastian commands. "We're done with hand to hand combat today."
I raise my arms over my head and stretch. I'm drenched with sweat even though it's freezing outside. In good news, my muscles are sore because, for the first time, I didn't use my magic to protect me. I had to rely on my shifter strength. Unfortunately, staying in my human form does me no good against a wolf if I can't use my magic. Without my magic, a wolf could rip me apart.
Faith and Micah take off for the woods, just two white blurs disappearing amid the snow-covered trees. Sebastian hangs back with me, and we head out on foot. We run until we reach the lake on the Teton pack's land. It's off the beaten path and away from the national park trails. That way, we don't have to worry about outsiders.
We stop by the water, and I catch my breath. Looking out at the frozen lake, I have to squint my eyes to keep the sun from blinding me. It's a beautiful sight.
"You're a lot stronger than I thought you'd be without your magic," Sebastian confesses. "I'm glad we decided to test it out this morning."
I laugh. "It wasn't easy. I'm so used to using it."
Chuckling, he peers off into the distance, and I do the same. I thought for sure I'd feel Cedric somewhere close by, but he's not. A part of me can't help but feel disappointed.
"I talked to Cedric this morning," Sebastian says.
The breath hitches in my lungs. "What about?" I ask, jerking my attention back to him.
His grin widens. "I can see it on your face. You're wondering why he's not here, aren't you?" He sits down on a fallen tree trunk and pats the spot next to him.
"Okay, fine," I give in, sitting down beside him, "yes, I'm wondering where he is. It feels weird not having him close."
"Like there's a part of you missing?"
Closing my eyes, I sigh. "Is that how it was with you and Tyla before you completed the bond?"
He bumps me with his shoulder. "All the time. It was bad. There was a lot of built-up tension between us. The woman loved driving me insane."
One thing about them is that they knew each other a while before the bond formed between them. With Cedric, it just happened out of thin air. "What did you and Cedric talk about this morning?"
"Well, he knows you're with Micah and me in the mornings for training. Being with us, he knows you're safe. I think he's afraid of crowding you. He doesn't want to push you away."
Hearing that makes my heart flutter. It makes it hard not to smile. I'm not used to men like that. The Sierra pack men took what they wanted when it came to women, and they weren't gentle about it. Sebastian bumps me with his shoulder again. "You do know how hard that is for him, right? His instinct is to be by your side. Tyla was such a stubborn ass I ended up not giving her a choice. Being around her both helped the rage but also fueled it because she refused to complete our bond. The need to fully be with our mates can be overwhelming at times. It's worse for us men."
This is what worries me. "I'm assuming Cedric will start to feel that way at some point?"
Sebastian shrugs. "Eventually. He's showing some amazing restraint right now. The more time you spend together, the more he'll want to complete the bond." I avert my gaze to the lake, but he gets up and stands in front of me. I have no choice but to look up at him. "I know this is all new to you, but you feel the connection to him, right?"
There's no denying it. I rub the aching spot over my heart. "I do."
"You'll know when the time is right, Laila. Cedric's a good guy. He's not going to push you into anything."
"What would happen to him if we didn't complete the bond?"
Sebastian's brows furrow, and he tenses. "What do you mean? Why wouldn't you?"
I shrug. "What if I'm killed?"
He runs a hand down his face. "Shit, I don't know. Now that more of us are finding our true mates, I can't recall a situation where that has happened." He moves closer and kneels in front of me. "Why are you asking this?"
"No reason," I lie.
The expression on his face makes my heart hurt. "Laila, if something were to happen to you, it would be the end of Cedric. The rage would drive him insane, and we'd have to kill him. We're bound to our true mates. If you decided not to complete the bond, I'm not sure what it would do to you, but I can imagine. It'd be like losing a part of your soul."
If I leave for the Land of the Fae, that will be Cedric's destiny. A life of torment and anger. Thinking about it makes me sick to my stomach. How could I ever do that to someone? But if I stay, I could lose him too. I could lose a lot more than him.
"Laila, what's wrong?" Sebastian asks.
Shaking my head, I plaster on a smile. "Nothing. I was just thinking about my date with Cedric this afternoon. When I was with the Sierra pack, I never went on any dates. Guess I should at least be somewhat grateful to the men I thought were my father and brother. They kept me safe. There were a lot of men in that pack who wouldn't think twice about raping me if they had the chance."
Sebastian's eyes flash with anger. "It's a good thing we killed them all."
Micah howls in the distance, and a few seconds later, he and Faith appear. Faith pads over to me, her tongue lolling out the side of her mouth as if she's smiling. "You're cute when you look like that," I say, teasing her. She bares her fangs, and I hold up my hands. "Okay, okay, you're not cute, you're vicious. When we get back, you have to help me get ready for my date."
She rubs her body against me and then takes off into the woods with Micah behind her. Sebastian stretches his legs and smiles. "Race you back?"
The second he says it, I race off through the snow, laughing as he yells at me. For the first time in my life, it feels good to have a family.
Amelie and Faith rummage through my closet and pick out a plum-colored sweater and a pair of jeans for me to wear while I finish curling my hair into loose waves down my back. Amelie stares at me through the reflection in the mirror, and I can see the concern on her face. She wants me to tell Cedric the truth. I still haven't told her that I could lose all of my fae magic if I complete the bond. It's my biggest fear. I don't want to lose the part of my mother that's inside me.
Faith notices the exchange and glances at us both. "What's going on? I feel like there's a conversation going on between you two that I'm not privy to."
After I finish curling the last strand of my hair, I turn to face them both. I look to Amelie, and she nods. "Tell her. I have a feeling she'll be on my side though."
Cedric is supposed to pick me up in less than twenty minutes, so I quickly start from the beginning, telling
her everything Beck said to me about how I'll be safe in the Land of the Fae and how Dorian is on the hunt for fae like me. I also tell them both about the possibility of me losing my magic if Cedric and I complete the bond. When I'm done, Faith leans against the wall with her arms crossed over her chest.
"Well? What do you think I should do?" I ask her.
She glances at Amelie but then stays focused on me. "For starters, you can't go with Beck to the Land of the Fae. Your family is here."
Tears burn my eyes. "You're right. My family is here. But if Dorian finds me, I won't have a family left. I can't sacrifice you all."
Faith comes over and takes my hands. "That's for the pack to decide, not you. We work as one." She's right, but if it comes down to losing them, I'll leave in a heartbeat. "The part about losing your magic breaks my heart," she says, her voice quivering. "I know it's a huge part of your life."
She pulls me up and hugs me. Gripping onto her tight, I let the tears fall. "It's all I have of my mother."
"Are you going to tell Cedric this?"
I shake my head. "I can't. He'll feel guilty."
She nods in agreement. "Yes, he will. I know him. He might even refuse to complete the bond." The thought of that makes a sudden burst of anger flash through my veins. Amelie and Faith both pick up on it and stand back.
"Whoa," Amelie calls out, holding up her hands. "That was pretty intense."
Grabbing my chest, I suck in a breath. I've been angry plenty of times before, but this was different. "I don't know what came over me."
Amelie blows out a sigh. "It's obvious. Your wolf wants her mate. The idea of him walking away from you doesn't settle well with her."
It's like my wolf is a separate entity in my body. I'm not fully connected to her, but yet, she's inside me, blocked behind a wall of sorts. I've never figured out how to get her out. "It's so strange," I murmur, rubbing my chest as the anger dies down.
Faith steps toward me. "I know your magic is important to you, but sometimes, we have to sacrifice things to get what we want. Are you willing to give up your magic to be with Cedric?"
That's the million-dollar question that I don't have the answer to. My magic is who I am. I don't know myself without it. Losing it will be like losing a part of my soul. The same goes for Cedric. If we don't complete the bond, it'll be the same way. Faith and Amelie can see the struggle on my face.
Faith places her hands on my shoulders. "Whatever you decide, you at least need to tell Cedric the gist of what's going on. In time, I think you'll know what to do."
Amelie walks over and drapes an arm around me. "I agree with Faith. You'll make the right choice."
I can feel Cedric getting closer, and I still have to put on my clothes. Amelie and Faith rush out so I can finish getting ready. A few minutes later, Cedric's voice echoes downstairs. He laughs about something with Faith, and it makes me smile. When I get to the bottom of the stairs and turn the corner, I feel at ease the second I see him in the living room, like a warm blanket has wrapped around me. I feel safe. At home.
"Hey," he says, sticking his hands in his jeans pockets. "Ready to go?"
I take him in, at the way his dark blond hair is neatly fixed. The scruff on his face has been trimmed, and his flannel shirt is tucked into his jeans. Very sexy and down to earth.
"I'm ready."
Faith clutches my arm and side hugs me so she can whisper in my ear. "Have fun."
Cedric opens the door and follows me out to his truck. Amelie and Faith both stand on the front porch and wave. "We'll see you later," Amelie calls out.
Cedric opens the passenger's side door for me, and I hop into his truck. "Where are we going?" I ask.
His grin broadens. "You'll see." He shuts the door, and when he gets in the truck, we head on our way. Once we get onto the main road, we drive toward downtown Jackson Hole. I've been living in Jackson for a month but haven't seen much of the city. I'm curious to see where Cedric takes me.
"How was training this morning?" he asks.
My muscles still have a slight ache to them. I stretch out my arms and laugh. "Well … Sebastian refused to let me use my magic, so I had to do everything with just my strength alone. I'm surprised I can even move."
Cedric chuckles. "Yeah, I heard about the hole incident with Micah. I would've liked to have seen that."
He looks over at me, and I smile. "It was pretty funny. I'll have to come up with different ways to get him next time."
"Remind me never to get on your bad side." Still grinning, he focuses back on the road. "How are you liking Wyoming? I know it's a lot different from North Carolina."
"Very different," I reply. "North Carolina is a beautiful state. I would've been happy there apart from the Sierra pack."
The expression on his face shifts, the anger evident on his face. "I know all about it." We come to a stop sign, and he peers over at me, his alluring gray eyes on mine. "I'm sorry you had to live like that for so long."
Towards the end, it felt like an eternity, a prison. It makes me wonder what I would've done if I'd known earlier that Vincent, the man I thought to be my father, killed my mother. I was little when he died, and that's when Jaret took over. In all honesty, I could've killed Jaret myself and escaped on my own, but I didn't know where else to go. The Sierra pack was all I knew at the time.
"Things happen for a reason, Cedric. I was safe with my pack, but really, I was a prisoner. They were corrupt and vile. I don't know how or why they became that way."
Cedric looks away and continues down the road. "The world is full of evil fucks, Laila. I've seen my fair share of them."
Faith told me a little bit about him and that he lost his parents at a young age. We both had a rough start in life. "Where were you before you became part of the Teton pack?" I ask.
His jaw clenches. "Montana. I lived there with my parents and my old pack. Everything was fine until our alpha started to go through the rage. One day, he killed two hikers in the woods, a young woman and a man. My father and some of the other men rose and put him down before he could hurt anyone else. After that, everyone went their separate ways. My parents and I stayed in Montana, but rogues killed them a couple of years after that. I ran away, and that's when Seraphina found me and took me in."
His pain feels like my pain, an unbearable ache in my chest. I know it all too well. It's how I feel when I think of my mother. I reach over and place a hand on his arm. Almost instantly, the anger inside him dissipates slowly, and the pain I feel in my chest lessens. Cedric looks down at my hand and sighs. "I've been told mates can do that."
Feeling the heat rise to my cheeks, I quickly remove my hand. Shifters love to touch, and I feel that urge more so than I ever have. It's not something I'm used to. Cedric doesn't say anything, but I can sense his disappointment about my hesitance.
"Did you ever find out who killed your parents?" I ask, hoping to change the subject back to something other than mate magic.
He nods, and his grip on the steering wheel tightens. "I remember that day as if it were yesterday. I haven't talked about it in years."
"It's okay," I murmur, hating myself for even bringing it up in the first place. "We don't have to talk about it."
We finally arrive in town, and he finds a parking spot right on the main road in front of all the shops. Cedric takes a deep breath and looks over at me. There's a sadness on his face that breaks my heart. "I try not to let the past get to me. We've all suffered one way or another. We just have to stay strong and live the life we were given."
"Very wise," I say with a smile. "From what I've heard about you, I didn't think there'd be a serious bone in your body."
His lips pull up slightly. "People change, Laila. Other than the recent pack wars, I never had a reason to be serious. Now I do." The air in the truck turns electric. Cedric glances down at my lips but then looks away quickly. "All right, we're here." We open our doors at the same time. Cedric gets out, rushing to my side to close the door after I climb ou
t. Very gentlemanlike. I'm not used to men like that. My entire life, all that surrounded me were cruel, murderous men, who loved nothing more than to use the women around them for their pleasure. In the end, they got what they deserved. They're all dead. I never have to worry or think of them again. That brings me comfort.
Cedric motions a hand toward the buildings, which reminds me of how an old western town would look. There are tons of shops and restaurants, all decorated for Christmas with their twinkling lights. What catches my attention is the town square right across the street. The entrance is an archway made from thousands of antlers, and every single tree inside the park glitters with shiny ornaments and lights. It's beautiful.
"So what do you think? I figured we could walk around and go to some of the shops? I didn't know if you liked Christmas or not."
My smile is so broad it hurts my cheeks. "Cedric, this is amazing. Christmas is my favorite time of the year, even though I never got to celebrate it like I wanted."
"Now, you can."
I like seeing him happy. A warm, fuzzy feeling wraps around my heart, and it comforts me. It's the strangest thing, but I like it. Cedric walks beside me, his arm brushing mine as we slowly make our way down the sidewalk. There are people everywhere, walking down the snow-lined streets, carrying bags of what I assume are Christmas presents for their loved ones. We walk past couples holding hands, and I can't help but watch the way they look at each other with such admiration in their eyes. Cedric looks at me like that. We don't know much about each other, but my body aches to be closer to him. I can't bring myself to make the first move though. It's like I can feel the wolf inside me, desperate to get out to her mate, but the other part of me holds her back.
Cedric points at something further down the road. "A new shop opened up about a month ago, just around that corner. I thought you might like to see it."
"Can't wait." I'm curious to see what it is. As soon as we turn the corner and get a good look at the different stores, I already know which one I'm drawn to.
