“Baby what happened? Did someone hurt you? Please tell me you’re okay and that the baby’s okay. Did anyone hit you?”
She sits there sobbing, not saying a word and this is fucking killing me. I am usually a patient guy but its taking everything I have not to go in there and raise hell. I know I need to be calm but how can I be calm when my pregnant girl is bawling her eyes out in the bathroom?
I lean down and whisper as I kiss her cheek and forehead.
“Baby, please answer me. This is killing me. I need to know that you’re okay and so is our baby. I need to know what happened.”
She takes a few minutes, which feels like torture.
“I was fine talking to Larissa when I overheard a couple girls talking about Cadence. They brought my name up and said I was a whore just like her, knocked up and with a baby daddy that cheats. This girl Jackie kept going on about how she has been sleeping with you for the past five months. She kept saying how you told her that once the baby was born, you were leaving me and taking the baby and having her mother the baby. She said everything will be over for me.”
That was enough to make my jaws and fists clench. I am infuriated and someone needs to get their ass beat. That girl Larissa was beating on must have been Jackie. I want to go down there and get to the bottom of this but first I need to be calm for her and reassure her. I don’t even know this girl, Jackie. I am severely pissed. I knew this was a bad idea to come here. I knew she would be uncomfortable.
She breaks the silence. “Were you working on the house the whole time that you said you were?”
She doesn’t trust me. This confirms it. She’s feeling insecure and thinking that I cheated on her. I would give my life up for her. She apparently doesn’t know the extent of how much I love her. Why do I feel defeated, worn down, and beaten? Probably because this may tear us apart and I didn’t even do anything wrong.
“Baby, look at me.”
I raise her chin so she can see my eyes as I spill out my heart to her.
“You are my forever girl, always have been and always will be. I promise to you I don’t know this girl. I have never cheated on you and I never will. I was working on our home the whole time. You can ask my Dad and Ben, they were with me the whole time. It killed me to be away from you. You are the only person that holds my heart and soul in your hands. I built that waterfall for you because I am hoping this will be the house we grow old together in, I wanted that waterfall as a landmark of our love. I wouldn’t have built that if I ever thought of ridding you after the baby is born. My life completely changed the moment you walked into chemistry class and it changed for the good. I regret nothing, absolutely nothing. Everything in my past has led me straight to you and I wouldn’t change that for the world. My life is with you and our baby.”
I lay my hand on her stomach and rest it there. She’s still looking me straight in the eyes and I know she can see my sincerity. I mean every word that comes out of my mouth. She smiles through the tears. I know she is still broken from this incident but I would like to think I shed a little bit of light and hope she believes everything. She lowers her head, eyes still sad.
“Can we go home?”
I knew she would ask that and as much as I want to go downstairs and raise some hell, she comes first. It’s probably better this way because if I do go down there, I may end up in a fight with someone and wind up getting arrested. I need to get my girl home and in bed where she wants to be. I help her wash her face up so she doesn’t look like she’s been crying all night. I know it’s impossible because her face is puffy, but we do the best we can. She finally simmers down, no longer sobbing but still has the look of misery on her face. My heart aches just seeing her in a state like this. I kiss her through her pain and suffering. I know she needs me right now.
We finally finish up and head downstairs. There is no more commotion going on, so I am assuming the fight is over. I walk to the car and get her in. As I am about to leave Drew pops up to the car and gives me his number.
“Call me, we need to get together. I know now’s not a good time. Get your girl home. Talk to you later.”
He was a good friend back in the day and just proved he’s a good friend still. He knows that I put her first which is why he didn’t try to get me to stay and I have respect for him for that. I leave the house and start heading home. I hold Serena’s hand without letting go the whole way home.
We arrive home and head straight to bed. She doesn’t even stop to change into pajamas. She just lies in bed. I snuggle up behind her and wrap my arms around her and whisper in her ear, “My sweet, sweet, Violet, my forever girl. I love you sweetheart.”
She doesn’t say anything back and it hurts. I know it’s a struggle to get words out when you’re emotionally exhausted. I’ve been in this position before when my mother died. I know how it is to be emotionally exhausted with no words to say. My mind runs all night thinking about everything because I know she is still unsure about me not cheating. She is guarding her heart. I need to figure something out; I need to make sure she knows. It may take some time but she will finally realize I will do anything in my power for her. I kiss her goodnight and fall asleep holding my beautiful girl.
Chapter 17
Serena
One Month Later
School is finally out for the summer and I couldn’t be happier. After the incident at the party, I didn’t want to show my face around school. I can’t explain how I feel to Aiden because since that night I have become insecure. The nagging thoughts in my mind that he could have been with Jackie all those times he claimed to be working on the project. I know it’s stupid to even think that he could cheat on me but it is a possibility. I’ve seen it too many times to know that sometimes when something feels too good to be true, sometimes it is.
Aiden swears he doesn’t know this girl but she doesn’t go to this school. How does she even know him? How does she even know me? I got her name because I overheard someone else call her name. This sits in my head like a puzzle that can’t be solved. I haven’t told Aiden about any of this, I have just kind of grown a little distant.
I still stay in our house but I’ve learned to guard my heart until I find out what truly is going on. I am seven months pregnant now which means I have two months to figure this out. I need to know before the baby is born if Aiden is in this for good. If he cheated, I’m going to have to leave and go back with my mother. There’s no way I’ll ever be able to trust him again.
The last month of school I spent dodging everyone. I don’t want to hear about that night again. I don’t want to hear anybody talk about what happened, because that was the night my heart ached from the possibility of Aiden’s infidelity.
I have been spending most of my days indoors because of the heat and now that I’m bigger, it’s starting to get harder to even get up. My back aches, my ankles are starting to swell because of the increased weight and pressure. It’s come to the point that I lie in bed or sit in the chair and just think. Thinking is also driving me crazy.
Larissa and I are even closer than before since she had my back. She has been coming over and helping me finish decorating the baby’s room. Two more months and this pregnancy madness will be over. I am starting to get uncomfortable, no matter what I do. I have seen the doctor recently and she told me everything is still good and everything is going according to the way it should. I just wish these next two months would speed up real quick. Aiden finally got a job at the local supermarket as a stock boy. He has money but he wants to keep earning so we never run out. He had to start off as a stock boy since he’s young. He has to just work his way up. He has been working full time since school let out for the summer. I honestly don’t mind. This extra time gives me time to think and process everything that has happened.
After about an hour I get so bored that I call up Larissa. She just happened to be with Abby. They said that they would stop by and hangout with me. I hate being alone. When I am alone, I can’t stop my mind from
straying to negative thoughts. I need my girls to steer me away from those thoughts because they know me and they know Aiden. I sometimes can’t seem to think straight.
They both arrive and I decided that I want to go for a walk. They seemed hesitant because I am bigger now. They don’t think I can handle it.
“I can walk, just don’t walk too fast.”
They nod and look at each other as if they are mentally trying to say something. Abby looks at me.
“I heard what happened at the party.”
I turn my head so she doesn’t see the tears that formed on my eyelids ready to fall.
“Yeah, crazy night.”
Larissa chimes in, “I beat that bitch’s ass. She won’t mess around with you anymore.”
I love her enthusiasm and her pride from beating her but the question still lies dormant in my mind.
“Who was she? How does she know Aiden? She doesn’t even go to our school.”
Larissa shrugs her shoulders.
“Maybe she used to go to Aiden’s school. He only lived a half hour from here right?”
“Yeah, but he said he doesn’t know her. Either something fishy is going on or he’s hiding something.”
I hate the thought that he could be hiding something from me. If he is, then I never knew him at all. The Aiden I get could just be an act. Knowing I may not know the real Aiden doesn’t sit right with me.
“I’ve known Aiden for a long time and I don’t ever recall him ever hanging around a Jackie. It doesn’t make any sense. But I can talk to Ben and we can ask around the neighborhood and see if we can find anything out,” Abby said.
“Yeah that would be great.”
I want to find out but deep down I’m afraid to find out. Whatever this could be could have the power to break me.
We finish our walk and go back to my house. We sit around in my living room eating ice cream as we watch the newest episode of Grey’s Anatomy. My feet are killing me, along with my back. I had to lie across the couch in order to get comfortable. When the show is over, Larissa and Abby leave. I welcome the peace and quiet again for the next hour until Aiden shows up. He walks in the door and comes straight to me. He leans down and kisses me before heading straight to the shower. He does this every time he comes home from work. He wants to kiss as soon as he walks in but will never make it further than that because he feels as if he’s dirty. He goes straight to the shower right away every night before he lounges around with me.
I lie there on the couch waiting for him to come out. He finally emerges from the bathroom in nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. He looks at me briefly, water dripping from his head, before turning around and walking to bedroom to get dressed.
He walks out of the bedroom in his pajamas and sits down on the end of the couch and lays my head in his lap. He starts caressing my face and running his hands through my hair, all while his other hand is resting on my enlarged belly. It’s hard for me to separate my emotions because I think Aiden could have another side to him but then he does something like this and completely melts my heart again.
“I missed you today, Baby Girl. I’m so glad to be home.”
I hear him, and I see how he has been and it becomes harder for me to believe this other girl, but I can’t completely disregard it. Once I disregard it, something will happen to shatter my trust in him. I learned after the party to put my walls back up, or at least partially.
He leans down and kisses me on the lips and at that moment the baby kicked. It was the most amazing feeling. I haven’t felt her kick yet. I have felt her move around but no kicking until now. My previous mood just got washed out at sea because now I am all smiles.
“Did you feel that?” I ask a little too cheerfully.
“Yes, I sure did. Looks like the baby feels our love.”
He smiles at me with those heart melting dimples and kisses me. My worries and troubles start to fade as we celebrate in the joy of yet another milestone in the pregnancy.
***
Aiden
This past month has not been one to admire. Serena has been distant. Our relationship isn’t the same and I feel as if it’s because of what happened at the party. I have been trying my hardest to reassure her that I have no idea who this person is but it doesn’t seem to work. I’m not sure what else to do besides get to the bottom of it. I need to find out what went on and why. From what I’ve heard from Larissa, this girl doesn’t even go to our school. Why target me? Or Serena, for that matter, if you don’t even know the person?
It kills me every day to walk in the house and nothing is the same. I feel as if I failed her. She looks miserable. I haven’t seen her smile in a while. I would do anything to bring that smile back to her face.
The day I felt the baby kick was the day I started getting hope again. That was the first smile I had seen since the party. I was so mesmerized that I catch myself constantly putting my hand on her belly, hoping that kick will come again.
I have been working five to six days a week. I know it will give her some space. As much as I want to be home, I think she needs some alone time. I don’t need the money right now but I should work until the baby is born and then cut my hours back.
I text Ben while at lunch.
Aiden: Hey. Let’s hangout after work. We need to talk.
Ben: sure thing. Come on over when you get off unless you want to meet up somewhere
Aiden: Nah it’s cool. I’ll come over.
One thing I love about Ben is he knows when something is bothering me. He knows I need to talk but he doesn’t pry the details out of me. He knows to wait until I bring it up. He has been there for me for anything I have ever had to go through.
I finish up work by seven and shoot Serena a quick text letting her know I was going to Ben’s. Her only reply was okay. I’m saddened by this even though I probably shouldn’t be. Even if she texted okay, she would always text I love you or a smiley face and now I am being subjected to a text that is reserved for a friend. I hate this feeling and I need this to go away.
I arrive to Ben’s and he’s on the porch waiting for me. I take a seat next to him and he says nothing. He’s waiting for me to talk.
“I don’t know what to do, Ben.”
He knows a little bit of what’s going on. He wasn’t at the party so he doesn’t know exactly what happened, just the run down version from Abby.
“I don’t know what’s going on but I’m here to listen if you want to drop it on me.”
He was always good at listening. I could talk for several hours and he wouldn’t say a word. He would just intently listen to me. When my mother died, I lost track of the time that he took listening to me. I would sit there for hours telling him stories he never knew about my mother and even as I cried telling the stories.
“Ever since that party, Serena hasn’t been herself. It’s almost like she’s shutting me out. I try to talk to her but she barely talks back. We used to be able to sit outside and just talk for hours and now it seems like she wants nothing to do with me. Last night was the first time she got excited or smiled and that was because the baby kicked. I just don’t want to lose her. I had this whole future planned out for us and if she or the baby aren’t there, it means nothing.”
“I know. You have to give her time. She will get over this. If it helps I can try to dig around the neighborhood and see if I can find something out. Abby mentioned something to me about it today. I’m not sure if I can find anything out since I’m four years older than you and they are people you went to school with but I’ll do my best,” he said.
“Thanks Ben. I just feel defeated.”
“No need to feel defeated. You can’t give up, that’s one thing you can’t do. Once she sees you giving up, she’ll think she’s not worth it.”
He’s right. I can’t give up but what else can I do right now? I will just have to try my hardest and live through the pain that I may lose the only person I’ve ever loved.
I finish up with Ben
after rambling for about an hour and head home. I just want to go home, lay my head down on the pillow and snuggle with my girl. If she will snuggle with me.
***
One Month Later
It’s been a month and I still haven’t heard anything about this Jackie girl. Serena is eight months pregnant now and she looks like she’s ready to have the baby. She could have the baby any day now. She’s still distant, although she seems a little bit better now since she is further along. I can see the discomfort she goes through when she wakes several times in the night to use the bathroom. I can see the struggle as she tries to rise from a seated position and it kills me every time. When I am at work, I worry. I worry about if she goes into labor, if she’s fallen, if she can’t move and I am not there to help her. I try my best at work to finish things quickly. I overload my stock load and overwork myself because it’s the only way to get past all the worrying thoughts that are flowing through my mind.
Never say forever (Never series Book 1) Page 19
