“You already held me together through my divorce. What would I do without a friend like you?”
“I was just thinking the same thing about you.” The thought of Angie moving made Paula’s heart ache. Besides Paula’s family, her friend had been there for her when Brent had left for Afghanistan. After the military had come to her door, Angie had seen her through her grief. They’d shared so much. Paula loved Danice.
“What about the Western Art Show in July? Have you started on something for it?”
“Not yet. No inspiration.”
Angie turned to her. “That doesn’t sound like you.”
“I’ve been going through a dry spell. It’s called artist’s block,” she joked.
“It’s called you’re depressed and don’t have anything exciting going on in your life.”
“I thought we did something pretty exciting tonight and look what happened.”
They pulled up into Angie’s parking stall. “You said you weren’t going to think about the mysterious Cody son anymore.”
“I’m not.”
“Liar. Something tells me that man has broken a zillion hearts. Be careful he doesn’t steal yours when you’re not looking.”
“Didn’t you notice? He’s not interested, and mine died.”
Angie undid her seat belt. “One of the most amazing things I learned during my first year of nursing was the power of the body to regenerate after a loss. My husband left me, and yours got killed. Our hearts underwent a mighty wallop, but they’re resilient, Paula. They’re still beating, which makes them vulnerable again.”
Paula got out of the car. “That’s the last thing I want to be.” The pain of losing Brent had been too devastating. “Spare me going through all that again. I couldn’t do it.”
“When I first found out Ken had been unfaithful, I felt like you. But not anymore. Life was meant to be lived. I intend to live it and not look back.”
“I’m glad you feel that way, Angie. With your positive outlook, I know you’ll meet someone wonderful.”
She smiled at Paula. “I live in hope. Shall we find out if our little angels are sleeping?”
They went inside Angie’s apartment. Within ten minutes Paula was back upstairs in hers. Clay had only wakened for a moment, but the second she put him in his crib he was out again. After kissing his cheek, she went into the kitchen for a soda.
Too strung up to go to bed yet, she checked her answering machine for messages. There was one from her mom, another from her brother, Kip, and one from her latest client.
“Hi, Paula. It’s Matt Spurling. Not having to be in the office this morning has given me some free time at home. I thought over what you said about there being three votes before any work goes ahead on the landscaping, mainly yours, mine and a third party’s. So I sat down with our vice president, Bob Javitz.
“Between the two of us we came up with that wish list you were talking about. You said to dream all we wanted and have fun making it. That’s what we did.”
Paula had already done the planning for the project with an engineer. But until she went over Matt’s list, she couldn’t draw up the design.
“I’m wondering what night you’re free. I’d like to take you to dinner and discuss it with you. Maybe this Friday? Call me at your convenience. I’m looking forward to working with you. Talk to you later.”
There were working dinner dates and then there were working dinner dates with more in mind than the business at hand. She was quite sure Matt’s suggestion fell in the latter category. He was dark blond, good-looking, maybe mid-thirties and divorced. Nice. Tomorrow she would phone him to make arrangements, but it would be for business only.
Still unable to settle down, Paula almost wished Clay were awake. She longed to hold him and sing to him until his eyelids fluttered closed. She needed a reminder of Brent to blot out another image that seemed to have taken over. One that was so arresting, she found she could hardly catch her breath.
Chapter Three
May 4
Tuesday morning Walker rolled out of bed after another nightmarish night, realizing he couldn’t put off the call to his mother any longer. It wasn’t fair to Jesse, who was having to keep Walker’s homecoming a secret from the family.
Before he did that, however, he needed to confirm his Wednesday appointment at 11:00 a.m. at the VA Clinic in Powell. It would only take a half hour to get to the college town northeast of Markton.
He made some instant coffee before straddling the bench of the pine picnic table on one side of the kitchen. While he looked out the picture window at the Indian paintbrush just coming into flower, he made his first call on the cell phone he’d purchased yesterday in Cody. Only the word Unknown would show up on the caller ID.
The receptionist told him he’d be seeing a Dr. Bader for a psychiatric workup per the arrangement with his physician at Bethesda. Just hearing that caused him to break out in another cold sweat.
I’m a nut job!
He slammed down the phone not realizing his strength. It cracked the display and made a little gouge in the varnished tabletop. When he tried to get a dial tone, nothing happened.
“Oh hell!”
He shot up from the bench and paced the red linoleum. His hand went to his face, reminding him it hadn’t seen a razor in a week. He’d looked like the devil the night the blonde woman from Markton had singled him out in front of Callahan’s. He looked even worse now. After making his purchases, he’d hurried back to his truck for fear someone would recognize him and tell the family.
It had shocked him to hear her call out his last name. Ever since that episode, he’d wondered how she knew. Once again he hadn’t given her the time of day. Guilt gnawed at him that he’d been forced to be unconscionably rude to her, especially when he was more troubled than ever by the soulful look in those fabulous blue eyes.
In his gut he was positive they’d never met before or he would have remembered. You didn’t forget a face and body like hers. He had no way of knowing if she was a local, or had come from somewhere else in Wyoming or out of state to vacation or visit relatives.
She wasn’t wearing a ring. He hadn’t noticed her with a man either time, but that didn’t mean there wasn’t a husband or a lover in the background. Her little boy was evidence of that. Walker didn’t like the fact that he couldn’t get her off his mind. The odds were against him ever seeing her again in passing, so to give her any more thought was absurd. He had something else pressing on his mind.
With his phone out of commission, he had no choice but to drive down to the ranch house and get this reunion over with in person. If his father was there, too, so be it.
He made a bologna-and-cheese sandwich with mayonnaise, consuming it on the way to the bathroom. A half hour later he emerged clean-shaven from the cabin in his new cowboy boots. He’d dressed in Wrangler jeans, two sizes smaller than he used to wear and a long-sleeved navy plaid shirt.
Another month of growing his hair out and he wouldn’t look like the Marine’s poster boy anymore. A cowboy hat had its uses. He’d always been partial to black. Jesse preferred white. Walker couldn’t help but wonder if that’s how their father saw his two oldest boys. No doubt when he discovered his number-two son had been back since last week without informing them, his estimation of Walker would degenerate to a new low.
Walker started up the truck and descended to the 7,500-foot level before the dirt road came out on pavement. He made a left turn and headed for his parents’ ranch house magnificently situated on an undulating rise. Evergreens spotted the landscape. Closer now he saw ornamental trees and a profusion of flowers bordering the emerald grass outside the front entry. Once again he marveled at the perfection of the landscaping. It was as if the house had sprouted from the earth as naturally as the flora.
He pulled his truck into the parking area around the side next to a couple of cars and a new silver Chevy Avalanche. Something told him that was the truck his mother used to get around the ranch these d
ays. Hopefully it meant she was inside.
His dad never drove anything but a Dodge Ram with the Cottonwood Ranch logo. He could be anywhere, but was probably at the office. If the family still operated the way they used to, the front door would be unlocked.
Sure enough it gave when he opened it. The first thing he saw was a larger-than-life-size bronze figure of a male rodeo rider on a horse. His father, an example of human hyperbole, had to have been the one who’d dreamed this up. Walker had already decided the landscaping was perfect, but the focal point of the massive, slate-tiled foyer was over-the-top.
He walked around it, then paused on the bottom step of the prominent staircase. It divided two-thirds of the way up to reach the east and west wings of the second floor. In a quandary, he realized that if he searched for his mother, it would startle her too much. Rather than ring the doorbell he called out, “Hello? Anyone home?”
Within seconds the sound of someone running broke the tomblike silence. In anticipation that it was his mother, his heart pounded harder. Soon the housekeeper who’d been with the family for years came hurrying out of a hallway behind the stairs. When she saw him, she came to a standstill. “Walker Cody—”
He smiled at the wiry, brown-haired woman who had a few more streaks of gray since he’d last seen her. Taking a step, he put an arm around her. “How are you doing, Barbara? You look well.”
“I’m fine,” she said, giving him a hug back, “but you’re too thin. If your mother doesn’t know you’re home from the war, you’d better let me go upstairs to the bedroom and tell her so she won’t have a heart attack.”
“I’ll follow you and wait outside the door.” She nodded before starting up the stairs ahead of him. “You’ve stayed nice and trim, Barbara. Must be from having to keep this mammoth place in running order.”
When they reached the east wing she smiled at him. “This house and three others.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, after your folks moved in here, three of the kids remained at the old homestead, and then there’s Dusty’s apartment over the barn and of course Tom’s and my cabin beyond the old arena. These days I have a couple of maids to help.”
There’d been changes.…
She led him along the hallway to the first door that was slightly ajar and tapped on it.
“Come in, Barbara.” The sound of his mother’s voice took Walker back years. It had a soothing quality, easy on the ears.
“Are you prepared for company? There’s someone here to see you.”
“You mean someone’s downstairs?”
“Not exactly.”
Walker couldn’t wait any longer before he entered the bedroom. His mother was bent over the side of the king-size bed where she’d laid out a paper quilt pattern to stencil onto fabric. She was famous for her homemade quilts. He’d watched her do this many times before.
Annie Cody, as everyone close to her called her, was a lovely woman, still trim in her jeans and Western shirt. Her hairdo was the same as before, a chin-length bob with heavy, forward-swept bangs from a deep side part. The only change he could see was that the color was more silvery-gray than blond now.
When she raised her head and their eyes met, she let out a heartfelt cry. Dropping her marking pen, she ran around the bed. He tossed his hat on the nearby table and met her halfway, picking her up to rock her in his arms.
“Mom…” he murmured, closing his eyes as he breathed in the familiar scent of the almond lotion she always wore. They hugged for a long time.
“Oh, Walker—” she broke down weeping “—I can’t believe you’re home at last.” She clasped him harder. “It feels like you’ve been gone forever. Did you already stop at the office to see your father?”
“No.”
“He’s going to be overjoyed. Tell me this isn’t just a visit. Tell me you’re home for good.”
“I am.”
“Thank God!”
After he lowered her to the floor, she cupped his face in her hands. “Let me look at you.” Her concerned blue eyes studied his features. “Even with the weight loss, you’re still the most handsome thing alive. Thank heaven your life has been spared to come home to your family.”
“As you know, a couple of my buddies didn’t make it back.”
“But you did!” She hugged him again. “Your room is ready for you down at the end of the hall. I tried to create your old—”
“Mom?” he interrupted her. “Before we do anything else, I’d like to talk to you for a minute. Please sit down.”
“All right.” She eased out of his arms. After wiping her eyes, she sat in one of the chairs near the huge diamond-shaped window. Their bedroom gave out on the same view he could see from the front of his grandfather’s cabin. Only the elevation was different. Her hungry gaze examined him.
“Don’t take this wrong, Mom, but I can’t live here. You know that.”
She clasped her hands together. “Because of your father.”
“Because of him, because I’m twenty-eight years old and need a place of my own. Because I’m no good to anyone right now. For the time being I’m renting Grandpa Walker’s cabin.”
Surprise broke out on her features. Before she could ask how that had come about he said, “I called Jesse last week and he set things up for me.”
Her eyes filled with tears. “Jesse knew all this time?”
“I’m sorry. I asked him not to tell anyone until I’d talked to you.”
She sniffed. “I guess I’m not surprised you turned to him, but honey—the cabin’s off the beaten path.”
“You know I’ve always loved the cabin. I’d rather be there than anywhere. It’s got propane and the big generator to keep everything running. That’s all I need.”
“But there’s no one to take care of you. After returning from years of being in the military and all you’ve had to face, you shouldn’t be alone. You need good food and someone to fix it for you. You need help to get back to your old life!”
“I’m aware of that, Mom.” This was the hard part. “I just don’t know about anything yet. I’ll be getting therapy at the VA clinic in Powell on a regular basis. For the time being I can’t tolerate being around other people. I was in a hospital for a couple of months before I flew home.”
She blanched. “What happened to you?”
“I was injured in an explosion. Nothing serious or I wouldn’t be here.”
His mother looked horrified. “Why have you kept everything to yourself instead of letting us help you?”
“You couldn’t have done anything. For what it’s worth, the best way you can help me now is allow me to stay away until I’ve had time to adjust to being back. I get nightmares and other things.”
“Don’t try to spare me. You can say the words, Walker. You’re suffering from PTSD and have flashbacks.” The trained nurse in her was talking. “The worst thing you can do is isolate yourself.”
He grimaced. “Give me time, Mom. Beyond my therapy, I’m doing a little fishing and hiking until I can figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life.”
“Understood, but don’t you forget the whole family wants to help you. They love you, Walker.”
“I love them.”
“You’re going to need to talk about what happened to you.”
“I know that, but for a while I have to be on my own.”
“Will you at least let me give a party next week so we can welcome you home? How about Wednesday night? Just the family? They’ll be here between rodeo events.”
Walker knew it had to happen sometime. “Sure.”
She took a deep breath. “When do you plan to tell your father?”
He shifted his weight. “I was hoping you’d do that for me.”
His mother rose to her feet. “I’ll do it, but I don’t understand why you can’t. If you only knew how he’s been waiting for you to come home. He loves you and is so proud of you.”
“Maybe that would be true if I were lik
e the boys and Elly who have his same vision of things. But as you and I both know, I’m the proverbial black sheep in this family.”
“That’s not true! I don’t ever want to hear you say that again.”
“Spoken like a mother.”
“Yes,” she fired back. “One who loves you to pieces.”
“I feel the same way about you, but we’ll talk later.” He made a move to leave.
“Wait,” she cried as he reached for his hat.
“What is it?”
“I just remembered something. Doris told me Paula Olsen came by the ranch office on Sunday looking for you.”
He frowned. “I don’t know anyone by that name.”
“Perhaps you don’t remember my sending you an e-mail about the landscape architect from EarthDesigns in Cody. She worked with us and the architect while we were building the house. Doris didn’t tell me until Monday. Paula wanted to thank you for saving her little boy from being bitten by a dog at the walkathon in Markton on Saturday. Is that true?”
Stunned by the news that his parents knew the mystery woman so well, he turned toward his mother. “It wasn’t anything. I just happened to be walking on the sidewalk when I saw him tumble out of his wagon.”
“Don’t be modest, Walker. It wasn’t a little thing.”
“I wonder how she knew who I was?”
“I have no idea. Doris told her it couldn’t have been you because you were in Iraq. She suggested Paula had seen your double and Paula left agreeing with her. Now it all makes sense. Of course she was grateful to you. After losing her husband, who died in Afghanistan, can you imagine her fright if her son had been bitten?”
She was a widow?
“I’m sure she’d appreciate a call from you, but of course that’s up to you.”
“Thanks for telling me, Mom.”
He started to leave, but she grabbed on to him. “Walker… Before you walk out the door, won’t you tell me what happened to make you push your father away so many years ago? I’d hoped that when you came home things would be different. There has to be an underlying reason for this breach. Can’t you bring yourself to confide in me?”
Walker: The Rodeo Legend Page 4
