by H. T. Night
Then the silent night was not so silent any longer.
“Tommy, stop!” a voice cried out behind me.
I turned around and there stood Maya. This time, she wasn’t surrounded by a glow. She stood out there in the night. She was walking on the same ground I was walking on. I started crying. “Maya, may I touch you?” I asked.
“No, Tommy. I am only a spirit.”
“Huh.” I reached out my hand, and even though she looked to be flesh and blood, she wasn’t. She was a ghost. My hands went through her as if she weren’t even there.
“Tommy! Don’t! You’re only going to make it harder.” Maya mirrored her body to mine and counter walked in front of me. “You’re going to make me long for you more than I already do.”
“You do?” I asked.
“I long for you more than I thought was humanly possible,” Maya said with a huge smile on her face. She might have been smiling, but her eyes were aching. “I’ve been watching you,” she continued. “Loving you. Begging you to stop. Until you forced me to do something I didn’t know was possible.”
“Which is what?” I asked.
“I have no idea how I felt you, let alone be strong enough to knock you backward off your bike.”
“You didn’t plan on doing it?” I asked.
“No,” Maya said. “Our worlds don’t touch. They never do. But somehow, my love for you was enough, and for that moment in time, I could touch you. What happened was a miracle.”
“I needed to see you one more time,” I interrupted. “I was questioning my sanity.”
“You’re very sane. You’re not even drunk anymore. I am real. I’m not flesh-and-blood real, but I am real nonetheless.”
“You left so fast. I need to know how and when I’m going to see you. I need to know specifics.”
“Tommy, I broke a couple of big-time rules knocking you off your bike and revealing myself to you. I have been given serious rules for you and me to go by.”
“Already? You were only gone for an hour, tops. Who’s in charge? What is in charge? What is it? God, Triat, what?”
“Those answers will be revealed to you when it is your time, just as they were revealed to me.” Maya looked at me in a way that said to not even try to test her on this one.
“I have to die to understand?”
“To truly understand all the wonderment... yes.” Maya looked at me and I recognized the look. It was a look I never thought I’d see again.
“Tommy,” Maya said, “I can never touch you again.”
“Really? Never again?” I asked.
“Tommy, I’m not alive in your world. I have a world that is all my own now. I have refused to be a part of it because I am so in love with you and I never want to leave your side. But we can no longer touch. If I allow it, I won’t be able to see you again.”
“Wow.” I didn’t know how else to put it. Maya revealed herself to me and I couldn’t hold her. She couldn’t hold me. I looked at Maya and said, “I remember your touch. You might have tackled me, but I remember how you felt.”
“I remember how you feel.” Maya looked at me with tears dripping from her eyes.
“I know we can’t touch,” I said. “Can you walk up close to me, so I can look into your eyes?”
Maya smiled and slowly walked over to me on the gravel ground. She wasn’t making a sound. She stood about six inches away from my body, and then she rose her body up so she could look me eye to eye. She looked at me and tears were continuing to drip from her eyes.
“I love you,” I said as a reflex to seeing her so close to me.
“Tommy, I love you too. I love you more now than ever before. My love for you grows every single day.”
“I was scared to love you any more than I had when you were alive.” I stared at Maya, and she never looked more beautiful. Her long, flowing blond hair was perfectly settled on her shoulders and her giant, beautiful blue eyes were looking right through me. I continued, “Even though I resisted and fought it off like the plague, I couldn’t help but fall deeper in love with you every moment we were together.”
“And now?” Maya asked for assurance.
“And now, I love you more than I ever thought I was capable of loving anyone.”
Maya was now openly crying. I might have been too. My face felt wet. I didn’t care. “Maya, what are the other rules?”
“Rules?”
“You said we had rules now.”
Maya paused and said, “Yes, we do. Tommy, you can’t tell anybody anything about what you have learned about me tonight.”
“Even Josiah?” I asked.
“Especially Josiah. He can never know, Tommy. If you tell anyone, especially my brother, I will lose all contact with you.”
“Really?”
“Yes, Tommy. The communication that we can have will be very limited.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means I can only see you sparingly. If I see you too much, we will also lose contact.”
“So, what does all of this mean?”
“It means we’re not without one another. We will be able to see one another once in a while and look into each other’s eyes. We can hear the other one say, ‘I love you.’ To me, it’s not perfect. But I was willing to take anything just so we could see each other at least one more time. If we don’t break the rules, we can see each other periodically.”
“Okay,” I said. “I’m not sure what I think. I just know it’s a dream come true seeing you again.”
“I know, sweetheart. I feel it too.”
I looked Maya in the eyes and I said, very simply, “I’m broken.”
“I know you are, honey. That’s why I’m here. We’re going to get you all fixed up so you can take on the rest of your life.”
“It does need some fixing up. How much time do we have before you have to leave?” I asked.
“None,” Maya said. “I’ll probably get in trouble for coming twice in the same day.”
“So, you have to leave again?”
“Yes, but before I go—Tommy, you need to listen to me. Sweetheart, you need to pick your life back up. I will be there. I won’t always be able to reveal myself to you as often as either one of us would like, but I promise you I’ll be there and I will love you. I need to go, Tommy. I need to know that you’re going to be okay.”
“I’m going to be okay,” I said. “I’ll make this work. Our love will make this work.”
“I feel the exact same way.” Maya paused. “I need to go. Just know I’m here. You can’t see me, but I’m here.”
“I love you,” I said.
Maya mouthed ‘I love you,’ and then she was gone once again. This time, her image just slowly disappeared, as if she faded away into the mist. She was gone for the second time in one night. Now I knew I wasn’t crazy. I needed to pick my life back up. I needed to climb to the top of the pile again.
Chapter Three
I walked my way to the main road. About two miles up, I found a café that opened up at six in the morning. There was no pay phone. I decided to wait for the morning crew to arrive. I looked inside and saw a clock on the wall, and it read 5:00 a.m.
My cabin was in Running Springs and that was miles farther down the road.
While I waited, I started to become extremely cold. My adrenaline had kicked up a notch seeing Maya and that adrenaline had been keeping me warm. I was a lot less amped up now, though, so the cold was finally getting to me.
There was a bench out in front of the café. I sat there and just stared off, thinking.
I was completely sobered up, and I was just contemplating how crazy everything in my life had been the last couple of months.
I needed to focus on MMA. I just didn’t know how.
Finally, around 5:50 a.m., a brown-haired woman in her fifties showed up and opened the front door. She was cute, but there was definitely mileage. Her name was Mickey. At least that’s what her name tag said. She yelled over to me and asked me if I
was okay.
“I’m all right,” I said. “I’m just cold.”
“Well, come inside. We’ll grab you some coffee. Or are you a hot chocolate man?”
“I’m definitely a hot chocolate man,” I said, laughing.
The woman was trusting. She let me in with her as she opened up the diner. I sat at the counter on one of the barstools.
Mickey put some water on the stove.
“Can I ask you a favor?” I said to Mickey.
“Depends on the favor. Is this where you get weird and I have to kick you out?” She was halfway kidding.
“Not at all,” I said. “I just need to use a phone and call for my ride to come get me.”
“That seems innocent enough.” Mickey reached into her apron, pulled out her cell phone, and handed it to me. I went to the call screen and dialed Josiah’s number. I had memorized it because it was an easy number to remember. Thank God.
Josiah answered on the third ring.
“Josiah? It’s Tommy.”
“Are you in jail?” Josiah asked.
“No, I’m not,” I said. “My bike isn’t exactly working and I need you to pick me up.”
“Right now?” Josiah suddenly sounded extremely tired.
“Could you? I’m stranded. The waitress here was real sweet to let me use her phone.”
“Waitress? Where you at?”
“I’m up in the San Bernardino Mountains. I’m about forty-five minutes up. I’m at a diner in the city past Running Springs. The diner is on the side of the road. It’s called...”
I looked at Mickey and I couldn’t remember if I saw anything other than the word ‘café’ out front.
“It’s called Café,” Mickey said.
“Josiah, the restaurant is called Café. It’s in a white building with the word ‘café’ out front in blue writing.”
“Where’s your bike?” Josiah asked.
“Let’s just say my bike no longer runs.”
“Why is that?”
“Could you please pick me up?” I asked, ending Josiah’s questioning.
“I guess I’ll be there in about an hour.”
“Cool, I’ll see you in a bit.”
“All right, man.”
“Thanks. Also, Josiah, bring some money. I have no wallet on me and I’m starving.”
“All I have is twenty bucks on me.”
“That will work. I’ll pay you back.”
“All right, Tommy. Goodbye.”
I looked up at Mickey and said, “When the cook gets here, I’ll take a large stack of pancakes.”
“There he is now,” Mickey said.
I looked up as an older man came through the front door.
“You’re late, Rob.”
“My shift is from six to two,” the man replied. He had gray hair and was probably close to sixty. He looked way too old to be cooking breakfast at six in the morning as a profession.
“It’s six-ten.”
“I’ll stay ten minutes longer.”
“That’s fine. We already have an order. I need a large stack of flapjacks.”
Rob looked at me and gave me a strange look.
“I would like some scrambled eggs too.” I said it out loud to whoever was listening.
“Hear that, Rob?” Mickey said. “Add a couple scrambled eggs to the order.”
Rob gave me a tight smile. Dammit, I was hungry and I didn’t want this guy spitting in my food.
I smiled at Rob the cook and basically told him with my eyes that he better not do anything to my flapjacks, or my eggs for that matter. Guys like me have a way of looking at certain men and they know very quickly who the alpha is. I’m always the alpha. I was in no mood. Sometimes it was better to display confidence than kindness. Kindness was sometimes looked at as weakness. There was no weakness here, and Rob needed to grab his apron and go to work on my flapjacks.
I nodded and didn’t smile. He got the picture.
“So, what’s your story, stranger?” Mickey asked me as she put the remaining silverware out around the café.
When she walked up to my counter and laid my silver before me, I simply said to her, “My story isn’t finished.”
Mickey stopped and looked me over and said, “I love that answer.”
I smiled at Mickey and she left me alone, aside from serving me my food. She knew I wasn’t a talker.
I spent the next hour eating my breakfast and looking at the old newspapers in the café.
Finally, around seven, Josiah came scurrying through the front door of the café.
I looked up and saw him, and we acknowledged that we saw each other. Then Josiah walked over to the counter where I was still sitting and sat next to me on a barstool.
“How much is your breakfast?” Josiah asked.
“I need like fifteen dollars with a nice tip. The waitress let me in here before they opened because I was so cold outside.”
Josiah looked at me and just shook his head, talking to himself loudly enough to make sure I could hear. “Of course, Tommy is halfway up San Bernardino at six in the morning with no money and no bike. That is a common thing to happen.” Josiah handed me fifteen dollars from his wallet. I stood up and walked to the cashier.
Mickey came over and asked, “How was everything?”
“Great,” I said. “You folks are good people. Thanks for helping me out.”
“No problem.” She looked at me and smiled.
Josiah and I jumped into his white truck. I sat in the passenger seat and just lay back. I had probably the most insane night of my life. To my credit, I had been having some pretty insane moments as of late.
Josiah drove quickly back down the mountain and we arrived back to our house in about forty minutes. I slid out of the passenger seat of Josiah’s truck. Josiah and I didn’t say a word the whole way home. I wasn’t sure if he was being pissy with me about having to pick me up. Josiah is a great communicator. Not like me. I was waiting for him to speak to me, but he never did.
We both stepped into the house. Josiah quickly made his way to his room and shut his door. I wanted to say a couple of things to him without revealing that anything weird had happened to me last night. I walked over to his room and knocked on the door.
“Yeah?” Josiah called out. I could tell by the sound of his voice that he was already lying in bed.
“Can I come in and talk to you?” I asked my much younger friend.
“Of course, Tommy. Come in.” I stepped in and Josiah was already shirtless, only wearing basketball shorts. He was on his bed and I had to say he still looked pretty cut, which was an understatement. Josiah just may have the best physique I have ever seen. I truly meant that. Smooth skin on top of hard muscle on top of great bone structure.
“Have you been lifting weights?” I asked.
“Is that what you came in to ask me?” Josiah returned. “If I’ve been lifting weights?”
“No, dipshit. I came in to talk to you, and I happened to notice that you seem pretty ripped. More than usual.”
“The last couple of weeks I have been hitting the weights. I’m surprised that you have taken time out of your busy drinking schedule to invest in someone else.”
“Huh?” Oh, now I knew why Josiah was peeved. He’d been going through his own shit. I turned to the bottle and he turned to working out.
Josiah continued and seriously let me have it. “It helps release my stress. Some of us choose to release pain productively. Not get drunk every night.” He was disappointed in me. And that realization stung far worse than I thought it would have.
I took a deep breath and said, “That is what I came in to talk to you about.”
“Okay,” Josiah said. This was getting odd. It was as if Josiah and I switched roles over this past month and he seemed like he was the mature, clear-thinking one.
“Josiah, I’m going to get my shit together,” I said. “I’m going to start training like a madman and get back on top. I still haven’t lost a fight..”
“Are you ready to do this?” Josiah asked.
“Why do you ask?”
“I don’t know. You’ve been a little reckless lately.”
Josiah had no idea to what limits my recklessness had gone. I wasn’t going to tell him, for many reasons. Main reason—I wanted to see Maya again. Josiah could never know anything.
“I’m better, Josiah,” I said.
“How can you say that? You had me pick you up at six in the morning because somewhere, somehow, you and your bike were separated. You see, I didn’t ask you what happened to your bike, because I knew it would be a screwy story.”
“Josiah, I want to tell you I’m back,” I said, cutting him off.
“Actions speak better than words,” Josiah said.
“I know. I’m going to tell you and then I’m going to show you. I’m going to get back on top in MMA. I’m going to better myself. I owe it to Maya’s memory.”
I guess that is what Josiah needed to hear. He was misty-eyed and asked if I had anything else to say.
I told him no, and I left his room and made it to my own. I was exhausted. The full moon was near. I’d have to check the calendar on that one.
Chapter Four
The next day, I started my training and detoxing from my recent addiction to, of all things, alcohol.
That first week was rough, I had to admit, and I wondered if I was going to have to be prescribed some medication from a doctor to deal with the alcohol withdrawals. Alcohol was so toxic that even immortals had a hard time fighting off its effects. I couldn’t die a normal man’s death, but I thought my innards were going to explode out of me. All the while, my head was having a full-on nuclear explosion. But I got through it. Probably because I’m immortal.
I felt Maya’s presence constantly with me. She was there when my body hit rock bottom about five days in. I couldn’t see her, but I felt her presence all around me.
I would have one-way conversations with her out loud. I was always alone when I did. I didn’t want Josiah or anyone else to think I was crazy. Maya never revealed herself to me, but I felt her aura all around me. I’d tell her how much I missed her. How much I loved her.
