Brianna removed her hand from Abby’s arm, realizing she was making her uncomfortable. “So, besides geeking out over classical musicians, what else do you do, Abby Slone?”
“Well, not much really,” Abby replied. “Between school and my job at the bookstore, I don’t have a lot of time left for hobbies or going out.”
“What are you studying?”
“I’m an English major. Just finished my third year at NYU.”
“What do you plan to do after you graduate?”
Abby shrugged. “I don’t know. I want to be a writer, but it is really difficult to make a living just writing. I guess I’ll teach or get a job as a copy editor somewhere while I write my first novel.”
“A novelist? You must really love books.”
Abby nodded. “I do. Sometimes I wish I did not have to worry about money so I had the time and freedom to sit around and read every great book that has ever been written.”
“I wish I had paid more attention in school and had graduated.” Brianna let out a sigh loaded with regret. “I feel like I missed out on learning a lot of things…important things. Now I understand the importance of education. But with my career, I just don’t have the time to sit down and learn anything or even read a good book.” Brianna gazed at the New York City skyline through the glass doors of her terrace as memories of her high school life flashed through her mind.
“I can’t believe you moved to L.A., all by yourself, at the age of 18. I don’t think I could ever do anything like that. You must’ve have been really scared,” Abby remarked, her face beaming with fascination and curiosity.
“I was terrified,” Brianna admitted, turning her gaze back to Abby. “You know, I didn’t run away from home because I wanted to be an actress. The acting thing was just a fluke. I ran away because I needed to get out of my parents’ house and couldn’t wait until after I finished school to do it. I needed to put as much distance as possible between certain people and I, so I took off.”
“Why did you run away? Who were you trying to get away from?”
Brianna chuckled softly and her gaze bounced around the room. From the look in Brianna’s eyes, Abby could tell the conversation had brought back some very painful memories for Brianna.
“It doesn’t matter now. Things have turned out pretty well for me, and the people who hurt me then and made me run away can’t hurt me now. I don’t even think about it anymore.”
Abby searched Brianna’s face. She wondered who hurt her and what they did to her that was so unbearable she had to run far, far away. She felt Brianna was lying to herself when she said she was over what happened to her. It was written all over her face just how much she was still hurting.
Abby’s phone buzzed once. She fished it out of her clutch and stared at the text message notification that popped on the broken phone screen. “It’s Kyle,” she mouthed to Brianna.
“You should get going, Abby. I don’t want you to have problems with Kyle because of me. Let me go get your new phone so you can go home,” Brianna said, before getting off the sofa and disappearing into the suite’s bedroom.
Abby read the text message Kyle had sent her. Kyle wanted to know where she was and when she was getting home. Abby replied that she was still at the bar with her friends but was about to head home.
Brianna returned to the living room with a box containing a brand new, white iPhone 5S. She handed the box to Abby and sat back down.
Abby grabbed the box from Brianna’s hands. “Thank you so much. You have no idea how much I appreciate this. I will pay you back. I promise.”
Brianna sighed and shook her head. Abby’s stubbornness would have been annoying if she wasn’t so darn adorable.
“Well. I have to go now. Thank you again for the concert. I had one of the best times of my life. And thank you again for the phone. We’ll keep in touch, Brianna.”
Chapter VI
Abby smiled sweetly at Brianna and got off the sofa. Brianna could no longer hold back. She stared into Abby’s sparkling hazel eyes and knew she needed to say what was in her heart. She knew she and Abby were not destined to be friends, let alone anything else. She knew they were probably not going to see each other again after that night, so Brianna decided to come clean.
“Wait!” Brianna yelped, grabbing Abby’s hand. “I have to confess something to you.”
Abby sat back down slowly and stared at Brianna with a puzzled look on her face.
Brianna took a deep breath and scooted over to get closer to Abby. “The other day at that café, I apologized to you for kissing you at the party. But the truth is, I’m not sorry.” She paused, realizing she was not explaining herself well. After finding the right words, she continued with her confession. “What I mean is that I’m sorry I made the bet, and I’m sorry I used you to get back at Kyle, but I’m not sorry for kissing you.”
Abby just stared blankly at Brianna and with her mouth hanging open.
Brianna reached out to touch Abby’s cheek with her fingers, but stopped herself midway. “I felt that kiss in every fiber of my being, Abby. That kiss is all I had been able to think about. I replay it over and over in my head, and I get chills every time. I can’t even concentrate on my auditions because I can’t get you or that kiss out of my mind. I even have dreams about it. All I want to do when I’m around you is pull you into my arms and devour those pouty lips of yours. And I don’t just want to kiss you. I daydream about doing other things to you… things that would probably gross you out and scare you and make you want to run screaming from the room if I told you.”
Abby let out a sharp breath she didn’t know she was holding. She just stared into Brianna’s glassy blue eyes while she spilled her guts to her. That’s all she could do…stare. All blood circulation had abandoned her face, and she could no longer feel her hands or legs.
“And I know it is selfish of me to even be telling you this,” Brianna continued, drawing a deep breath, her face contorting as she tried to fight back tears. “You are a straight girl in a relationship with my own brother. I know there is zero chance of anything ever happening between us, but I needed to get this off my chest because it’s been eating me inside. I hope that now that I’ve told you, I’ll be able to sleep at night and get on with my life.” She stopped talking. She wet her lips and sucked in a breath waiting for Abby’s reaction to her stream of consciousness.
Abby drew in a deep breath as her gaze bounced around the room. Her brain was trying to put together some coherent thoughts she could convey to the tormented woman who had just poured her heart out to her. “I have to go.” Those were the four words that fell out of Abby’s mouth after the world’s longest pause. Those were the only words her brain could string together. Clutching the iPhone box to her chest, she slowly got off the sofa. She avoided Brianna’s gaze as she dragged her barely functioning feet towards the front door.
Already regretting her selfish confession, Brianna shot to her feet, grabbed Abby’s clutch off the sofa, and followed Abby to the door. Abby placed her hand on the front door’s handle and began to turn it. Halfway through the turn, she stopped and turned around to face Brianna. Brianna handed Abby her clutch which Abby awkwardly snatched and clutched to her chest along with the iPhone box. Brianna searched Abby’s face and held her breath, waiting for the visibly shaken girl to say something, anything to her.
“Goodbye, Brianna. Take care of yourself,” Abby whispered, her eyes looking everywhere but Brianna’s face. Brianna wrapped her arms around Abby, and Abby rested her chin on Brianna’s shoulder. With the iPhone box and Abby’s clutch standing between them, Abby and Brianna held each other for a bit. They both understood that was going to be the last hug they would probably ever share. Brianna was wishing she could take back what she had just said to Abby because all that did was confuse and terrify the poor girl. Abby wished she could tell Brianna that she felt exactly the same way about her, but she knew that information would not have done either one of them any good and would have on
ly made their goodbye more painful than it already was.
With Brianna’s arms still wrapped around her, Abby leaned back a bit so she could stare into Brianna’s sad blue eyes one last time. Brianna brought her hands up to cup both sides of Abby’s face. She stared into the glassy hazel eyes, thinking how much she was going to miss looking at them. “Goodbye, Abigail,” she sniffled before leaning in and placing a tender, lingering kiss on Abby’s lips. She sighed into Abby’s mouth. Those lips felt as soft as she remembered and tasted just as sweet.
“I’m sorry. I need to stop doing that,” Brianna said sheepishly as she pulled away from Abby’s warm lips.
With the heat of that kiss still burning on her lips, Abby’s eyes darted from Brianna’s eyes to her lips and back to her eyes. She was trying to summon up the courage to do something she knew she shouldn’t do but felt compelled, by forces beyond her control, to do. A voice inside her head kept telling her to walk away and do the right thing, but Abby ignored it and followed the desire in the heart instead. With her heart pumping at an alarmingly fast rate, Abby chucked her clutch and the iPhone box on the floor and lunged at Brianna. She gripped both sides of Brianna’s face with her hands and crushed Brianna’s mouth with hers.
Brianna reacted to the surprising but most-welcomed kiss by placing her hands on the small of Abby’s back and pressing Abby’s petite body against hers. She cocked her head to the side so she could take every inch of Abby’s hungry mouth inside hers. She mentally compared that kiss to the one they shared a few days earlier, and there was no comparison. The unexpected, mind -shattering kiss they were sharing in that hotel suite was better in every possible way. There was no deception, coercion or malice behind it. That kiss was as hungry as the first one, but it was also honest, sweet, beautiful.
With their mouths and their tongues engaged in a fiery battle for supremacy, Brianna dragged Abby towards the couch. After almost tripping over the coffee table, they both tumbled down on the luxurious sofa, and Brianna immediately climbed on top of Abby.
With lust reeling through her veins, Abby parted her legs and bent them at the knees so Brianna could nestle her hips between them. Abby’s pulse quickened when Brianna laid the full weight of her body on her. Having another woman’s body pressed against hers like that felt very strange to Abby but also very comfortable. She moaned into Brianna’s mouth while her hands got acquainted with Brianna’s bare back. Abby’s mind was in a daze as the pads of her fingers glided up and down the impossibly smooth skin. All of her actions were being dictated by the overwhelming tidal wave of desire pulsating between her legs, and she was powerless against it.
Brianna did more than nestle her hips between Abby’s legs. She relieved her pent-up longing for the petite brunette by ferociously thrusting her hips against Abby’s, grinding on her over the fabric of her gown, while her lips sucked and bit every inch of Abby’s cherry flavored lips with desperate hunger. Brianna had spent many nights and days dreaming of that moment, dreaming of tasting those soft, pouty lips once again. Having Abby under her, responding the way she was responding to her touch and kisses, was beyond anything Brianna could have possibly dreamed of.
Just when Abby thought her mind could not shatter into smaller pieces, Brianna’s hand found her breast. With an urgent moan that drowned inside Brianna’s mouth, Abby arched her back, pushing her small breast against Brianna’s unrelenting hand. Brianna’s mouth bounced around from Abby’s lips to the side of her neck, to the swell of her breast, and back to her lips. It was as if she could not decide which part of that girl’s body to feast on first.
The feel of Brianna’s soft lips nibbling and tasting those sensitive parts of her anatomy sent delicious shock waves of pleasure through Abby’s body.
It didn’t take long for Brianna’s hand to free Abby’s breast and disappear under the skirt of Abby’s gown. Clumsily and nervously, Brianna wrestled with the ample skirt. She flipped the chiffon fabric up with one hand until most of it was bunched up on top of Abby’s torso. Brianna moaned hungrily against Abby’s neck when her hand made contact with the smoothness and softness of Abby’s bare leg.
Abby responded with a moan of her own to Brianna’s hand gliding up and down the length of her leg. She began to writhe under Brianna, no longer able to control the lust burning through every fiber of her being. The high voltage shots of electricity pulsating between her thighs kept increasing in intensity and frequency with every passing second.
Brianna’s lips found Abby’s once more and slammed against them. While Brianna’s tongue danced inside her mouth, Abby was certain she wanted to go all the way with Brianna, whatever that meant. But something snapped inside her head when Brianna’s fingers curled under the lace of her panties and began to slide the delicate fabric down her hips. Fear overwhelmed Abby’s senses when her underwear glided down low enough for cool air to hit the delicate and oversensitive part of her anatomy.
Breathing heavily and with her heart in her throat, Abby gripped Brianna’s wrist, immobilizing it. Her panties were already halfway down her thighs when things got just a little too real for Abby. She freed her lips from Brianna’s. “Stop. I can’t do this,” Abby cried out, breathless.
Brianna, still panting, stared down at Abby with a dazed look on her face.
With confusion and shame jumbling her thoughts, Abby shoved Brianna away and sat up. Abby thought she was ready to go all the way with Brianna. She clearly wasn’t. It hit her that she was about to become intimate with another woman, something she had never done before in her life. Terror consumed every fiber of her being, and she needed to get out of that hotel suite as soon as possible. Kyle had also sneaked into her hazy thoughts. Kyle had never cheated on her, and there she was, about to cheat on him, with none other than his own sister. The realization consumed her with soul-crushing guilt.
“I’m so sorry. This is wrong. I can’t do this to Kyle. I love him,” Abby explained, her voice cracking. She began to tug and pull at her panties until they were back covering her sex. She then unbunched the bottom of her dress and shot to her feet.
Kneeling on the couch and panting, Brianna searched Abby’s face and wondered what she did wrong. Abby stood by the sofa, fixing her dress and hair and avoiding Brianna’s gaze. Confused, and unable to verbalize any of the things she was thinking at that moment, Brianna sprung to her feet and made an attempt to touch Abby’s arm. But Abby didn’t give Brianna a chance to get near her.
Abby picked her clutch off the floor and rushed towards the suite’s front door. She ignored the iPhone box. With her hand on the door handle, Abby realized she couldn’t just storm out of there without saying anything. Brianna didn’t deserve that. So she turned around, and her gaze landed on the saddest pair of blue eyes she had ever seen. It broke her heart to see Brianna hurting so much, but there was nothing she could do about it. The type of relationship Brianna wanted with her was just not possible.
“I don’t think we should see each other again. I’m sorry,” Abby said softly as tears began to well in her eyes. Her lips curved as if she wanted to say something else, but she quickly realized that what she wanted to say wasn’t going to make either one of them feel any better. So she kept her mouth shut and turned her back to Brianna. Her hand trembled as she clumsily turned the doorknob and stormed out of the hotel suite.
The sound of the door slamming shut reverberated through Brianna’s body. Feeling like the air had been knocked out of her, she collapsed on the couch and laid her forehead on the armrest. She had never been as angry at herself as she was that night. She went too far, and she hated herself for it. She was mad at herself for kissing Abby at that party. She regretted seeking Abby out at the bookstore and taking her to see The Philharmonic. She also regretted spilling her guts to her. She cursed her lack of self-control that led her to kiss and grope Abby on that sofa. Brianna wanted to kick herself for messing with that poor girl’s head and causing her pain and confusion she did not deserve.
Brianna needed someth
ing to alleviate the ache in her heart. So she dragged her guilty feet to the kitchen and fetched the bottle of wine she had opened earlier. She returned to the living room holding the half full bottle and collapsed on the sofa once again. Her gaze bounced around the room before falling on the iPhone box lying on the floor. That iPhone box was a cruel reminder of all the beautiful and painful things that had happened that night. Brianna couldn’t bear to look at it. So she picked it up and tossed it out of sight. With her free hand, Brianna reached down to unbuckle her silvered strappy sandals. After getting them off of her feet, she curled on the sofa and began to drink wine straight out of the bottle.
Chapter VII
Brianna had never felt as low as she did that night. She hoped to drown her sorrows in the expensive white wine and forget all about Abby. But she could not get the sweet girl out of her head no matter how hard she tried. She closed her eyes and could still feel the burning of Abby’s lips on hers. The sweet scent of Abby’s cologne was still etched in her dress and in her skin. The memory of Abby writhing under her and responding enthusiastically to her touch was so vivid, no amount of booze was going to be able to erase it from her mind. Brianna wished she had never reached out to Kyle. She wished she had gone her whole life without laying eyes on his adorable girlfriend. They would have saved themselves a lot of hurt and confusion if they had never crossed paths.
Betrayal: Abby's Guilt (The Betrayal Series) Page 6
