Carmen rarely asked Jan to do anything close to socializing. She felt kind of bad, refusing her.
“A hot toddy might be just what the doctor ordered. You know what I mean?” Carmen added.
Jan dragged in an indecisive breath.
Looking disappointed, Carmen said, “Well, if you change your mind, I’ll be in the Emergency Room.”
The Emergency Room was the after-hours hang out for many of the Mercy Hospital staff. She knew exactly where it was, though rarely went there.
Deciding that Carmen probably had something on her mind and needed a friendly ear, Jan reconsidered. The fact that she was dreading another night of tossing and turning with visions of Beck Braxton in her head helped change her mind.
“You know, a hot toddy might just be the ticket. Give me a second to change out of my scrubs and I’ll meet you.”
“Why don’t we drive over together?” Carmen shoved her arm into a black jacket. “I’ll drop you back at the parking lot on our way home.”
Jan shimmied out of her scrubs. “You’re on, but just one drink.”
“Sure, just like the doctor ordered,” Carmen said, as she left the locker room, leaving the door to flap behind her.
Similar to a real emergency room, the bar was busy and noisy, but that was where the similarities ended. Dark and fueled with a completely different kind of energy, the tables and booths were close to overflowing that Saturday night. The latest female American Idol winner belted out a song through the piped-in music. A heated game of darts went on in a corner called the “Surgical Ward” and the adjacent billiards room had a sign over the door, “Hospital Administration.”
Carmen pointed out an empty booth, grabbed January’s hand and led her to the back of the room. While passing the bar she ordered their drinks and showed the bartender where they were headed.
No sooner had they sat down than Gavin Riordan appeared.
“What’s he doing here?” Jan blurted.
“Beth took the twins to visit their grandmother in Florida. And his son’s away on a Scouting trip for the weekend. He must be lonely.”
Jan smiled at the newly domesticated head of ER. She would never have believed a quiet allergy nurse could have tamed her boss when she’d first started working at the Mercy Hospital ER two years ago. It only went to show that miracles could happen.
Carmen waved him over.
“Ladies.” Gavin nodded and pushed his way into the booth next to Carmen. “The drinks are on me.”
“That’s fine with me, as long as they aren’t going to deduct this from my Christmas bonus.” Carmen sprang into action with her boss. Sure, they spent most of their time at work verbally sparring, but no one was fooled by their antics. They’d go to the mat for each other in a heartbeat.
“You didn’t get the memo about the suspension of all bonuses this year?” he chided.
“Don’t even go there,” Carmen snarled.
The drinks arrived and Gavin paid.
“Bring a couple of beers, OK?” he instructed the waitress.
“You drinking for two tonight?” Carmen asked, with a mock-innocent toss of her head.
Before Gavin had a chance to answer, Jan’s heart dropped. Pushing through the crowd was the unmistakable figure of Atwater’s notorious bad boy, Beck Braxton. What was she supposed to do now?
She cast a terrified glance around the bar for an emergency exit. “Listen, I’ve got to go.” Jan started to stand, but Gavin’s strong grasp kept her from reaching her full height.
“Have a seat,” he said. “You’re among friends.”
He had no idea the fire he was playing with. In panic mode, Jan darted her gaze to Carmen.
“Drink your toddy and relax. That guy’s a hunk by anyone’s standards. I should be so lucky.” Carmen took a deep swig of her white wine and gave a Cheshire-cat smile that Jan had an overwhelming desire to scratch off her face. Relax? Easy for her to say.
Beck’s step faltered when Jan peered out of the booth and caught his gaze. He recovered so quickly, anyone with less of a trained eye would never have noticed. She did what she’d been told and gulped the warm brandy-and-honey concoction and tried to act nonchalant when he reached their table.
Beck filled the only remaining spot in the booth, the seat beside her.
“I ordered you a beer,” Gavin piped up.
Beck nodded his thanks and glanced to his side, at Jan. She wondered if her smile looked as unconvincing as his. They all sat in momentary silence and sipped their respective drinks. Gavin broke the silence with a question for Beck.
The men discussed the day’s events, and Carmen sat rapt, chin in palm, swigging her wine and listening. With the aid of the twelve-hour antihistamine, Jan’s drink swirled through her head and soon she found it hard to focus. Dull buzzing droned in her ears. Occasionally Carmen would kick her foot under the table to urge her to join the conversation. Jan ignored her and sat mute, staring at her hands.
Soon a warm blush settled in and she loosened the top button of her shirt to help cool off. She hadn’t felt this uncomfortable since the first day of open-grade art class when she had been fifteen, and seventeen-year-old Beck had been her big secret crush and had taken a seat next to her.
Jan blinked and squinted to try and focus better. As far as men went, Beck was an incredible specimen. Dappled shadows from the bar lights accentuated the line of his jaw and the depth of his eyes. Still, his magnetism frightened her. She didn’t dare study him for long.
“Are you OK?” Beck asked, bumping her thigh with his knee under the table.
“I’m feeling a little strange. What’d they put in this drink?” She turned to Carmen.
“Brandy. When’s the last time you had a real drink?” Carmen tossed her a disbelieving glance.
“I’ve never had brandy.”
Carmen raised her hands and glared at her boss. “Guys, I swear I had no idea the woman was so backward.”
Gavin chuckled and finished his beer. “You need a ride home, Jan?”
“Carmen’s going to drop me back at my car.”
Beck broke in. “You shouldn’t be driving. I’ll take you home.”
Jan glanced toward Carmen for help. She found evasive eyes and a fidgety hand smoothing coarse black hair. Wasn’t she going to bail her out? Knowing Beck, he’d grill her until she’d told him the truth about why she’d broken up with him. She wasn’t anywhere ready to tell him what had happened. What in the world should she do now?
Beck stood at the exact moment Gavin did. They shook hands goodnight, and Carmen skirted behind them and headed for the door.
“Thanks a million,” Jan said under her breath, leaning out of the booth.
“I should be so lucky,” Carmen whispered, tossing a glance Beck’s way. Jan stood along with everyone else. Soon she’d be on her own…with her ex.
She weaved fingers through her short bob and straightened her glasses. The drink may have soothed her throat, but she felt wobbly, parched and edgy. Realizing Beck was checking out her low-slung second-skin jeans, she quickly put on her extra-long sweater. His eyes traveled back to her face.
“You can wear my helmet.”
Her head shot up the moment she realized the mode of travel Beck had in mind.
“It’s against California law to ride without a helmet.”
“I’ll have to take that chance, won’t I?” Typical of Beck. “You look like you need some water,” he said.
She sat back down on the booth bench. “A cup of tea might help clear my head.”
Beck raised his hand and flagged down the waitress. “A tea and some water, please.”
“Then let me get a cab,” Jan said.
He shook his head. “That would be too convenient.” His irritated stare let her know in no uncertain terms he was no happier about this than she was. So why had he offered? “I think you’re overdue for a ride on my chopper.” A punishing smile thinned his lips.
Jan found it hard to sip tea through a lo
cked jaw, especially with Beck sitting across from her, glaring.
“What?” she challenged.
“What do you mean, what?” He played dumb, but never broke his stare.
“We both know you’ve got an axe to grind with me.”
He crossed a foot on his knee and continued to bore a hole into her head with his stare. “So true.”
She defied him, refusing to look away, and drank more tea, though it burned all the way down. His long fingers tapped rhythmically on the tabletop. She took another punishing sip. He cleared his throat.
“You know, it’s customary when people say they love each other to keep in touch when one goes away.”
“I didn’t realize you were such a traditionalist, Beck. I thought you couldn’t get out of Atwater fast enough.”
It hurt like hell to be flippant, but she had no choice tonight. Now wasn’t the time or place to sort out their differences. She’d made her choice years ago and he couldn’t find out about her secret. Not tonight. Not ever. Not if she could help it.
“We had an agreement, January.”
“Too bad, so sad, guess I broke it.”
Beck went completely still. Warning cold serpent eyes sent a chill slithering down her spine. “That’s garbage and you know it. Level with me. Your mother sent you away, didn’t she?”
She vehemently shook her head. “Nope. I wanted to go.”
“Where? Where did you go?”
“To modeling school.”
“Then why are you a nurse?”
“Look at me, Beck. Do I look like model material to you?”
At a stalemate, they stared at each other across the booth, the dim lights hiding the truth.
“Let’s go,” he said, standing to his full six feet two inches.
Jan would rather have walked home barefoot on hot coals than ride on the back of his Harley. What had once been exhilarating and sexy as all hell had suddenly turned into an exercise in torture.
CHAPTER THREE
DETERMINED not to make physical contact with Beck on the motorcycle, Jan pushed as far back on the pillion as it allowed. She planted her feet on the bars and braced her hands behind her along the edge of the elongated seat, gritting her teeth as if doing so would keep her steady and safe. Once settled, she gave Beck directions to her house.
She used to love riding on the back of Beck’s motorbike, but this time it made her feel jittery and tightly strung. Out of practice, she stared at the back of his neck rather than watch the road spin by.
The moonlit sky and pleasant temperature normally would have made for a perfect night to ride with the top down in a car. But this? Completely vulnerable on the back of Beck’s bike, she chewed on her lower lip and prayed she’d make it home in one piece. When had she become such a chicken?
After a stoplight, he jumped into what felt like hyper-speed and her hands went flying around his leather-covered torso. But Beck was on a residential street where the speed limit was thirty-five m.p.h. What felt like reckless abandon to Jan was probably because of the hot toddy and the real speed doubtless closer to twenty-five.
Turning her face, if it weren’t for the bulky helmet, she’d have smashed her cheek against his back. He stiffened and sat a bit straighter. As it was, her chin dug into the muscle just above his scapula. Solid and steady, he stayed ramrod straight, making it easier for her to anchor herself to him.
A quick reminder of the stable force he’d once been should have helped her relax. It didn’t. Her arms were around the last man on earth she’d ever wanted to see again.
Jan clenched her eyes tight and held on as if her life depended on it, and remained that way for several minutes until he slowed down and entered her driveway.
What would her neighbors think about the quiet and withdrawn condo dweller arriving home well after midnight on the back of a chopper? It almost made her grin, but she remembered who the driver was, and lost all sense of amusement.
After forcing her eyes open, she jumped off the bike before he had a chance to help. She almost lost her balance but managed to steady herself after a series of klutzy hops. Rather than watch his long legs and tight ass when he expertly removed himself from the machine, she fidgeted with the helmet. Yeah, she’d peeked first. Her hands fluttered and made little progress in loosening the strap.
“Here,” he said, stepping too close and reaching for her. “Let me get that.”
Like magic he unlatched it and had her free and clear in a flash. She swallowed and stepped back quickly, almost tripping on the curb. He caught her by the elbow.
“Whoa. You OK?”
“I’m fine. Fine. Thanks for the ride. Goodnight.” She wanted to run but decided it would be too obvious. Avoiding his eyes, she turned and forced a normal pace toward her porch. He strode right behind.
“I’m fine, remember? You don’t have to see me to my door.”
“What would your mother think if I didn’t?”
Her mother? When had been the last time she had considered what her mother thought about anything? Ever since Karen Stewart had told her to “get rid of it”, as if Jan’s pregnancy had been nothing more than an inconvenience, she’d questioned her mother’s advice on anything.
Beck used to go out of his way to impress Mrs. Stewart, as if knowing that the key to any girl’s heart started by winning over the mother. Karen had been anything but impressed with the wild and edgy teen, and Jan had never been able to convince her otherwise. His joining the Army and her subsequent pregnancy news had had Karen cursing Beck’s very existence. It seemed she’d had plans of pushing her daughter into the limelight, with high hopes of making a buck or two off her looks. The pregnancy had forced Karen to come up with a different idea. She’d refused the traditional adoption agency the school counselor had found, instead finding an ad in a local paper and pursuing private, open adoption with a couple and a special lawyer willing to pay more than the usual prenatal health-care fees. Then she’d forced her underage daughter to lie.
Jan and Beck reached her door and she fished through her purse for the key. Once she found it, she glanced up. Beck was staring at her with intent dark eyes. Sharp angles of moonlight and porch lamp shadowed the serious mask of his face. She tried to read his expression but fell short. Something told her to be still.
He moved forward to frame her face with surprisingly warm hands for someone who’d just driven a motorcycle. Cold fear swept over Jan when she realized he planned to kiss her. She sucked in a breath of protest, but was forced to hold it when his lips covered hers. Her hands flapped at her sides. His hungry, searching kiss tore at her good sense. She dropped her purse. Her hands found their way up his arms to his neck, the neck she’d stared at the entire drive home, and she kissed him back.
With mind battling body, her will lost when she parted her lips and stole a taste of Beck’s velvet-smooth mouth. His tongue pressed against hers and jagged, raw energy sliced through her center.
Beck.
She remembered his kisses. They always led to heaven…or the back seat of his father’s car.
Her lips searched his mouth, drawing on long-forgotten memories of frantic make-out sessions with the hottest boy in high school. The guy all of her friends had warned her against getting involved with. The one who’d taken her virginity on a special night she’d never forget as long as she lived.
The father of the baby she’d lied about. The baby she had given away.
Beck.
His demanding kiss guided her from far-away thoughts back to the moment. The man still had it, and she felt whatever “it” was all the way down to her toes. With her body swirling with sensations, and her knees growing weaker by the second, she somehow managed to come to her senses and tore away from the dangerous kiss.
She shook her head and sputtered for air. “What the hell are you trying to do?”
Calculating hazel eyes delved deep beyond her guard. “Just testing,” he said.
She shuddered.
He bent do
wn and picked up her purse, handing it to her. “Goodnight, January,” he said, as if he hadn’t felt a thing. “I’ll see you at the hospital.”
Stunned, she watched Beck saunter to his motorcycle, put on the helmet, rev the engine and ride off into the night. By the time he’d disappeared round the corner, her heart still hadn’t figured out what a normal rhythm was.
What the hell had he been thinking? Beck hit the freeway at breakneck speed. Maybe he could ride off the old feeling that had penetrated the barrier around his heart. Damn! It was supposed to have been a revenge kiss, angry and rude, but it had quickly turned into a steam-up-January’s-glasses-and-mess-with-Beck’s-head kind of kiss. Wearing the heavy armor of retribution, he hadn’t expected to react so thoroughly to her. He’d assumed he’d become immune, but time and pain hadn’t changed a thing.
The soft, sexy sparks had started almost immediately at the touch of her lips to his, and had soon escalated to near fireworks. Her tongue had nearly driven him out of his mind. It had been all he could do to keep from pressing her against the door and feeling every inch of her. If she hadn’t stopped him, he’d be thinking of ways to get inside her house and into her bed right this minute.
This wasn’t how he was supposed to get even. He wasn’t supposed to want her. If he wanted to get even, he’d have to toughen up, regain her trust, then move in for the payback.
He stepped on the gas and hit the highway as if in a race to save his life.
“Tell me. Tell me. Come on, share.” Carmen zipped up beside Jan the moment she arrived at work the next afternoon, already hot and annoyed from the inconvenient bus ride in.
Jan stared straight ahead and kept walking, foolishly hoping to put Carmen off. No such luck.
“You ride off into the night on a Harley with a hunk, and don’t have anything to report? You’re more messed up than I thought.”
“Knock it off. It was just a ride home. You deserted me, and I was stuck with Beck. That’s all.”
Carmen stopped, arms akimbo. She let out an exasperated sigh. “What flaw did you find this time?”
Temporary Doctor, Surprise Father Page 4
