by Faye Byrd
His bark of laughter is so abrupt, it startles me a bit, but I hold firm. “You think ya got the balls to make someone pay, huh?”
I lean up and smirk. “Already have. Two someones, actually, and looking to add a third,” I say, turning to exit the office.
I hear his footsteps behind me so I casually stroll through the bank, making sure he’s keeping up. When I get out to Arrow, I run my hand down his neck in a gesture of affection. Once I’m atop him, I turn to ride right past Ernest, real slow-like, laughing inside at the astonishment on his face. Now he knows who them two someones were.
With a tip of my hat, I make my way down the main road and into the saloon.
Getting inside the rich banker’s house proved to be much easier than I expected. But running into his cook wasn’t. Most likely it should’ve been. The vermin likes to show his wealth, and the kitchen of his home ain’t no exception.
As soon as I come through the back door, she gasps and drops a skillet of cornbread she’s taking from the oven. I freeze for a second, but know if I don’t make a tough decision, my plan will fail—and that just ain’t an option.
I approach her quickly and cover her mouth. “Shh, do as I say, and ya won’t get hurt.”
At her frantic nod, I slowly removed my hand. “I can’t let ya go ‘cause ya might run to him, but I promise to make this as easy as I can.”
She watches me with fear in her eyes. “What ya gone do to me?” she asks, trying to back away.
I grab her wrist and start twisting my rope around it. “I’m gone tie ya hands and feet and gag ya. Then I’m gone put ya in a bedroom. As long as ya stay put, it’ll all be over soon enough.”
It hurts me to see the fear in her eyes, but it hurt more to see my parents murdered in cold blood. I take her to the room and leave, and if all goes well, she’ll soon be free.
I pull all the curtains closed and make the sitting room as dark as possible. With the setting sun, it gets darker every minute. I take up a seat in a lone, wingback chair in the living room, pulling it ‘round to get a clear view of the front door.
As I sit and wait, my mind churns over what I’m ‘bout to do, but my decision’s made. Ernest Nelson’s gone die for his crimes, and if I got to commit my own, then so be it.
The knob twisting draws me from my thoughts. I perk up, sitting tall and stiff in the nearly dark space. Drawing a deep breath in through my nose, I steel myself for what’s to come.
“Hattie,” he calls after closing the door. “Why’s it so dark in here and where’s my supper, I’m starved.”
I stand, hands resting on my Colts. “Hattie’s indisposed.”
Even though it’s almost dark, I can tell the exact moment he realizes what’s happening. His whole body stiffens. “King,” he states wearily, as if he knows this is the end.
I strike a match and light the candle sitting on the table beside me ‘fore meeting his eyes. It’s like I can feel the change in my own. Where they used to be young and full of hope, now they’re hard and full of steel.
“Mr. Nelson,” I drawl with a sarcastic edge. “Funny meetin’ you here.”
“Cut the shit, boy,” he starts, trying to put an edge into his voice, “and state ya piece.”
“Oh, I got a piece for ya, but it ain’t the kind ya mean.” I tap Pa’s Colts.
“Don’t talk a game ya ain’t ready to play,” he says, taking a step closer. “Ya know ya ain’t gone pull that trigger.”
I reach down and grab the other item I had laid on the table and hold it out. “Take it.”
He chuckles, but try as he might, it’s more a nervous chuckle than anything. “Okay,” he says holding up his hands. “You got me. All right. That what ya wanna hear?”
“I done heard all I need a hear. Now, take the damn gun!” I spit, skidding it across the floor to his feet.
He swallows nervously and glances at the pistol as if he’s afraid of it, but my patience is wearing thin. “Pick up the goddamn gun or be shot where ya stand without a chance at all.”
He squats slowly and reaches out as if it might bite him. Cold-blooded murder this may be, but at least I’m giving him some kind a shot. As soon as he has it in his grasp, he stands quickly. My eyes are focused on his fingers and as soon as I see one curl toward the trigger, I draw.
Two shots fire.
One through his head.
One through his heart.
He slumps to the floor dead as my parents.
My pa always did say I could draw faster than a rattlesnake could strike.
I reckon he was right.
Chapter Three
The Retreat
NATHAN
With Ernest lying dead on the floor, I make my way back to the bedroom where Hattie’s stashed. Her eyes go wide with fear at my appearance. Holstering my guns, I make my way over with my hands up to show I mean no harm.
“Ma’am.” I tilt my head and squat before her. She’s huddled in the corner, tied, with a gag in her mouth. “My business here’s done, and like I said, you’re safe. But I can’t let ya go just yet. I need a get away from here. Don’t fret, someone will find ya soon enough.”
She starts shaking her head rapidly, but I ignore it and turn, slinking through the house and out the back door. Hearing the voices of several men, I stick to the shadows as I make my way back to the saloon where I left Arrow tethered.
Trying to look inconspicuous, I ease up on my horse and quietly nudge him to get a move on. Staying close to the buildings, I amble down the road, spotting a group of men right at the pathway to Ernest’s front door.
“Sounded like it came from here,” one of the men says, pointing toward the house where a dead body’s just a waiting to be discovered.
“That’s Nelson’s house,” another replies.
“Let’s go check it out,” a different one answers, and they start up the walkway.
Nudging Arrow, I pick up speed; I only got minutes ‘til his body’s found. When the hoofbeats echo off the packed dirt, I chance a look back only to find the last man in the group staring directly at me.
Facing forward again, I kick Arrow into high gear.
Time to get the hell away from this town.
A week and a half later, I’m two states away and close to Thomas Farm. I been about as careful as I can be, but even I know there're no guarantees they ain’t already looking for me. I could a stayed and tried to plead my case, but I ain’t pleading shit. That son-of-a-bitch deserved to die, and I ain’t got no apologies for it.
In fact, I won’t even surrender willingly.
My whole life trajectory changed with my parents’ murders. Long gone are the thoughts of living my days on Pa’s farm. Now it’s thoughts of just keeping out of the hands of those who look to punish me for taking my revenge.
If this is my life now, then so be it.
With my guidance, Arrow turns down the long, dirt drive leading to my uncle’s place. Picturing the sadness on their faces as I break the news is enough to make me amble as I make my approach.
Don’t take long, though, ‘fore I spot a lone horse heading my way. Judging from the width of the rider’s shoulders, I can only guess it’s my cousin, Arthur. Even with the sad news I done come to deliver, a small smile curls my lips at the sight of him.
He stays stiff on his mount as he rides closer. By the time I can see the expression on his face, a deep V done formed between his brows. It makes me smile even wider. They shoot up high then. “Lil Nathan?” He moves even closer and a larger smile forms. “Well doggone, it is you!” Then he looks past me and furrows his brows. “Ya here alone? Where’s Big Nate and Aunt Anne?”
I shake my head and look to the ground, unsure what to say. This ain’t a story I wanna share more than once. “Is Uncle Roy and Aunt May around? I’d rather explain it to everybody at once.”
“Lil Nathan,” he says, pausing ‘til I meet his eyes. After studying me for a second, he concedes, “Let’s go then.” He turns and kicks his horse into
a gallop.
Taking a deep breath, I urge Arrow to follow. We spend the rest of the ride down the drive in silence. He’s got to know it’s bad, and I appreciate him not pushing me to say more.
As the large house comes into view, I can’t help but feel some small relief. It may not be my parents, but I’m finally with family again. I allow the tension to drain from my shoulders, if only for a little while.
I follow Arthur down to the stables and we dismount, handing the reins over to a young helper that came scampering out of the barn as soon as he saw us. “Hold up,” I say to the lad before reaching in my side pouch and retrieving the satchel. Then I unload the sack carrying all my worldly possessions. Giving the boy a nod, I turn to Arthur and tilt my head toward the house. “Ready when you are.”
“Well let’s get to it then. Ma and Pa gone be excited to see ya,” he replies, leading the way to the front porch. “What’s it been? Four? Five years now? Lil Nathan’s all grown up.” He hooks his meaty arm ‘round my neck and pulls me close.
I chuckle and do my best to escape the trap, my hat getting knocked off in the process. After leaning down to pick it up, I stand and meet his eye, my face turning serious. “Grew up quicker than I wanted to actually.”
He studies me for a second but backs off and stays silent for the rest of the walk. ‘Fore we even up the steps, though, the screen door is swinging wide and a hugely pregnant goddess is exiting. I almost trip up the stairs at the sight of her. My mouth gapes as Arthur marches straight to her and puts his meaty-ass arms ‘round her, planting a big ole sloppy kiss on her lips.
After he’s done thoroughly plundered her mouth, he keeps his arm ‘round her waist and turns to me with a smirk at my expression. “Lil Nathan, this right here’s my Birdie.” He puts his free hand on her huge belly. “And this here’s gone be Lil Arthur.”
I snap my jaw shut and swallow. “Uh … the name’s just Nathan, ma’am.” I remove my hat and tilt my head. “Nice to meet ya.”
She moves closer, out of Art’s arms, studying me with a stern expression. “You done been through some shit, ain’t ya, boy?”
I drop my eyes to my feet for fear of ‘em seeing the pain her words bring. “Yes, ma’am.”
“Hey,” she says tenderly, moving closer. “Let’s get you in to see May. Nothin’ like a little family to make everythin’ better.” Her arm loops through mine, and she leads me toward the screen door.
I walk past Art, my eyes wide. His chuckles follow me into the house. When Birdie releases me to go get May, Art moves up beside me. “Th-that ya wife?” I ask him, watching her form as she sashays from the room.
His face transforms from one of jubilance to one of pride, his chest puffing out. “Sure is. Never thought I’d say this, but gettin’ married’s the best thing I ever done. Meetin’ Birdie changed my life.”
“I bet,” I say bitterly. The bile rises at the thought of how my life’s done changed. I can’t even imagine having a woman’s love with what I done did. I take a deep breath and blow it out between my teeth. No use wishing for things that ain’t ever gone be.
“Nathan, I don’t know what ya been through, but it must’ve been bad for ya to show up here alone. But you here now, we gone make everythin’ all better. You’ll see,” he assures me.
I shake my head. “I don’t think ya can fix this, Art, but I appreciate the thought.” I go over and sit on the couch, my head in my hands.
I stay that way ‘til a soft hand touches my back, and a heavenly voice reaches my ears. “Lil Nathan? Is it really you all grown up?” Aunt May’s voice cracks as she asks the questions she already knows the answers to.
I stand and turn, her arms going ‘round me in a tight embrace. “It is you!” She laughs and squeezes me harder. But all too soon, the real question bears down on me.
She pulls back and grabs both my arms. “Where’s Nate and Anne?” Her brow is puckered and the wetness is there just waiting to spill, I can see it.
I close my eyes ‘cause I don’t wanna say the words.
She shakes me. “Lil Nathan?”
I shrug from her grasp and turn away. “Please don’t call me that no more. I ain’t Lil Nathan, it’s just Nathan now.”
“Okay, Nathan.” Her panic rises. “Where’s Nate and Anne?”
“Where’s Uncle Roy?” I retaliate.
She slumps in a seat and looks to Arthur. “Go fetch ya pa.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he replies, already headed to the door.
Birdie retreats back to the kitchen and Aunt May studies me silently. I turn away, unable to look her in the eyes. Ma was her sister, and all Pa wanted was me to make sure she made it out of there, and I couldn’t even do it. Now, on top of that, I done turned into a murderer.
A justified murderer.
But a murderer still.
I pace the room, practicing what I’m gone say.
Wondering how they gone react.
Are they gone run me off? Turn me away? Insist that I go back and face my crimes?
Birdie interrupts my thoughts by taking a position in my path. “Sit,” she orders with a finger pointed to a nearby chair. Afraid of disobeying, I consent.
She then holds out a cup and a piece of bread. “Supper’s not quite ready, but ya need some nourishment to go along with that.” Her head tilts toward the cup. “Now eat up.”
Too afraid not to, I shove the bread in my mouth and eat ‘til it’s gone. Then I turn up the cup. Not quite expecting the foul taste, I spew its contents on the floor. “What the heck!”
“Whiskey.” Birdie smirks. “Now drink up, you gone need it.”
This time, I take a small sip and allow it to burn its way down my throat. I continue that way ‘til the cup’s empty and my head is light.
“Better?” Birdie asks with a smile. I smile back, ‘cause how can I not? She’s beautiful and glowing, looking at me all sweet and tender.
Afraid of what I might say, I just nod my head really fast.
“Nathan,” Aunt May says, drawing my attention to her. “It’s bad, ain’t it?”
I swallow and close my eyes. When I open ‘em, she don’t need no reply, the pain of it all is written on my face.
She gasps and covers her mouth. “What happened?”
I shake my head and drag my emotions back under control. “Just once, please. I only wanna have to say it once.”
Silent tears start streaming down her cheeks. With a small nod, she brings her hands up and covers her face, breaking down before my very eyes.
And she don’t even know the worst of it yet.
Chapter Four
The Reality Check
NATHAN
Lots of tears are shed at my news, but no judgments are passed. Sure, Uncle Roy would’ve liked me to have chosen the legal option, but he didn’t condemn me. He’s just mostly glad I made it here unscathed.
May, on the other hand, was plum proud of me. She cried a lot and held me tight, but she made sure I knew she’s glad that nasty man’s dead.
Since then, I’ve settled into the loft of the barn and been helping with the property maintenance. I know I can’t stay here forever, but for now, just being with family helps.
Me and Art are riding out into the pasture to check on a downed fence. “How long ‘til Birdie has the baby?” I ask, just making idle conversation.
“Lil Art will be here in a little less than a month,” he replies, smiling like a big ole goof.
I shake my head. “Ya know it could be a Lil Birdie, right?”
He lets out a loud chuckle. “Nah, that’s a baby boy cooking.”
I laugh, but then turn more serious, my mind churning with thoughts of Arthur and his happily-ever-after. Something I won’t ever get. “How’d ya meet her?”
He stares off into the distance, his eyes becoming unfocused. “Pa delivered one of their calves and I went along to assist. It was stuck in the birth canal.” He shakes his head and smiles in my direction. “Ya should a seen her all covered in
dirt, down on her knees between that heifer’s legs. I was smitten at first sight.” He heaves a big sigh. “I was lucky, she felt the same as soon as she laid eyes on my manly self.” He puffs out his chest. “Maybe you’ll be that lucky one day.” He smirks.
My shoulders deflate. “Naw, Art, that ain’t in the cards for me. Not with what I done did.”
“Look,” he snaps, pointing a meaty finger in my direction. “That don’t define you as a man! Ya did what ya had to do, and it’s done. In the past. Time to move forward.”
I consider what he’s saying, and he’s right about one thing, I do got to move forward. “You’re right. Maybe it’s time I start plannin’ my next move.”
“What ya mean ya next move?” he demands, eyes locked on me under the brim of his hat.
I pull Arrow’s reins, bringing him to a halt. “I mean where I’m headed next,” I say, looking off into the pasture. At his big ole huff, my eyes snap to his. All I see there is anger so I hold up my hands. “Look, we both know all I’m doin’ here is a waitin’ on someone to come after me. There ain’t even a guarantee it’ll be the law. Hell, it could be more gunslingers, and I ain’t ‘bout to risk y'all like that.”
“Ya done been here over a month and nothin’. Way I see it ain’t nobody a comin’,” he states emphatically, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Ain’t no way they gone forget I exist. I murdered an important man in town, seemingly in cold blood. It won’t be overlooked,” I argue, grabbing Arrow’s reins and turning him back toward the house. “As a matter of fact, maybe I should get a move on sooner rather than later.” I push him into a gallop and ride away, leaving Arthur sitting there to huff all on his lonesome.
It don’t take but a minute before Art is riding beside me again, silent this time, keeping his thoughts to himself. I always knew I couldn’t stay here forever, and this little talk just helped me realize all I’m doing is getting too comfortable. I might just forget who I am and what I done did if I stay here much longer.
