My eyes sting as tears surface.
Lucas’s arm wraps around my waist. “Please don’t cry. Let’s get you out of here.”
Karen shoves my shoulder. “You were just waiting for an excuse to dump him, weren’t you? When did this start?”
People have their phones out now as we march down the hallway, filming us go by. Just what I need. So much for laying low. I don’t know how much more of this my heart can take.
“Tom won’t see me until you go back to him. Anthony kicked him out. Don’t you think you’ve punished him enough?”
I stop. Punishment? No, these are consequences of his choices, not mine. Taking a deep breath, I turn to face her. “Since Christmas, Karen. You’ve been cheating since Christmas. That was months ago. Months. You both lied to us for months. I never lied. Lucas is just a friend, always has been.”
I glance at the camera phones pointing at me. I need to be careful with what I say because it will probably end up on the internet. “I’m not a cheater, and I won’t tolerate being cheated on, by anyone.” I meet Karen’s eyes. “Tell him I may have been a pushover a few months ago, but I know better now. Even though it hurts, I’m going to move on.”
I turn away and she yells, “That show made you self-centered. Think about him.”
I clench my fists. “He does enough thinking about Tom for both of us. It’s time someone thought about me.”
I march on. Lucas’s hand rests on my shoulder. With a quick glance, he gives me a small, proud smile. Lucas’s support fills me with warmth and gives me the strength to keep walking.
“Hailey!” Karen yells from behind us, but I’m done. So done.
Back in Lucas’s car, I finally allow my tears to fall. They roll down my cheeks as my body goes numb. When will this torture end?
Lucas squeezes my knee. “You were very brave.”
“Thanks,” I say weakly. I don’t feel brave.
“I don’t have much time left, but…” He starts the engine. “Let me show you something.”
I nod. After that scene, any kind of escape will do.
He drives us to a park with a large pond. Geese and ducks compete for the bread a young family tosses into the water, and trees make a canopy over the path around the water. Lucas takes my hand as we stroll.
I cry again while he guides me along the quiet path. He doesn’t say anything, but his presence is all I need until finally I can speak. “It hurts so much.”
“I know.” His thumb strokes the back of my hand.
“How did you let it go?”
“Time, mostly.” He squeezes my hand. “It wasn’t easy. With Tom kicking up such a fight, it’ll be harder for you. My ex accepted my decision and left me alone.”
“Who was she?”
A long silence falls before he finally answers. “The lead in the musical. I still see her a lot, which makes it hard at times.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry.” He squeezes my hand, smiling. “Things have turned out for me. They will for you too.”
I wrap my arm around his, resting my head on his shoulder. He understands me just the way I need, even though it means he has suffered the same pain that I feel.
He leads me off the cement path down a dirt trail. “My family used to come here when Dad was still around, and we’d sing together. It’s private, hardly anyone comes this way.”
We walk about fifty yards, until a small amphitheater, made by the trees, opens up around us. I can’t help smiling as I gaze around. “Wow.”
“I have many happy memories here,” he says, stepping up on a log lying across the clearing. “The weekend before Dad had his heart attack, we came out here. Looking back, although I had a ton of attitude about the trip, I’m glad we did it.”
“You having attitude? I can’t imagine that,” I tease.
“Hard to believe, I know.” He hums softly. “That song will never leave me. We sounded so good.” He walks along the log, humming. I don’t recognize the tune, but it matches the style the family uses. By the sound of it, it’s probably an Islander song.
He jumps down at the end of the log and turns to me. “Things were simpler then. So much has happened. But, there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel.”
“You’re so optimistic,” I say, watching him circle behind me while humming. “I wish I could be like that.”
“You are.” He steps in front of me. “Sing “Lagan Love” for me.”
“What?” I side-eye him.
He smiles. “I loved when you sang it at the auditions. You completely blew me away. You were freaking out so much I honestly thought you’d choke. Then the most beautiful voice came out of your mouth.”
“I thought I’d choke too,” I say with a smirk. “I almost didn’t go out on stage. You guys intimidated me. I thought there was no way I’d get in after hearing you.”
“I guess we’re all too talented for our own good.”
I chuckle, which makes his smile grow.
He sighs. “Come here.”
I step over and let him wrap his arms around me. “I thought you were a huge jerk back then,” I say into his chest.
“I still am.”
I giggle. “No, you’re not.”
“Clarissa says I’m overprotective. I thought I was protecting her from you, but now I want to protect you. You’ve become part of the family.”
“Protecting her from me?” I pull back and look up at him. “What kind of person did you think I was?”
“I don’t know.” He rubs his face. “You kept staring at my brother, and she’s had friends who only hang out with her for him.”
“Isaiah?”
“Yeah.”
“I did?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh…how embarrassing.”
He smiles. “He loves the attention.”
“I know.”
He wraps his arm around my shoulders. “We better go. The flight is in two hours.”
“Oh, yeah.” I frown. The thought of him and Clarissa leaving makes a hollow pit form in my stomach. I’ve never relied on anyone so much other than my mom. But the Murphys are my second family now, and I love each of them. Clarissa feels like my sister, and Lucas…I glance up at him as we walk, and he smiles a warm, tender smile at me. My heart stirs. How do I feel about Lucas? The more I think about it, the more confused I become.
***
Clarissa cries as she clings to me. Lucas groans and tugs her arm. “It’ll only be a few weeks.”
“That’s too long!” Clarissa sobs loudly, making people stare and take pictures when they recognize us.
“Clarissa.” I sigh, patting her back.
“You’re being dramatic,” Lucas says, prying her arms off me.
“No! You need me right now. I should stay.” She struggles to pull away from Lucas.
I push her back. “Clarissa, I’m a grown woman. I can handle it.”
She breaks free and throws herself at me again. “You have to call me every day and tell me how you’re doing. If he tries coming after you again, you call Lucas’s friends.”
“I will. I’ll be fine.”
She squeezes me so tight I can’t breathe. “The show won’t be the same without you.”
“Clarissa, shh.” Lucas pulls her away again.
“Hailey, you have to show up for—”
Lucas covers her mouth. “We’ll see you soon.”
“Bye, guys.”
Clarissa keeps turning and waving as they make their way through security. Once they’ve gone, I sigh, turning to walk slowly back to my car. I have a month until the final, and I have to figure out how to live my life again now that everything in it has changed.
Chapter Sixteen
My phone startles me from my sleep. Fumbling in the dim morning light, I find it. “Yeah?”
“Hailey,” Mom says. “Check the internet headlines.”
I flick open my laptop. “What is it?”
“Gossip. Brace
yourself.”
I open my browser and the morning headlines show up. Shots of me arguing with Karen appear. “Oh no.”
I open the article and read out loud. “Quest for a Popstar sensation Hailey Becker returns home to a less-than-warm welcome. Witnesses at her university campus state she emerged from the library with fellow contestant Lucas Murphy, hand-in-hand, where a classmate began verbally abusing her. In one video, caught by Eric Thurton, the classmate is heard saying Miss Becker had been waiting for an excuse to dump her boyfriend. Miss Becker responded by saying she was ‘no cheater.’
“A friend of Miss Becker says she has been dating Thomas Daly since Halloween of last year, and a classmate of Mr. Daly says he has struggled since she left for the show. With Lucas Murphy’s appearance with her, it raises doubts on whether Hailey’s claims that they are just friends are true.”
I huff. “Don’t people have anything better to do?”
“At least in the video you can be heard saying they cheated,” Mom says. “But that’s not the worst of it. I saw an article saying one of the channels will be talking to Tom today.”
“Fantastic.” I rub my eyes. “I don’t know how to deal with this. I’m barely dealing with what happened as it is.”
“Lay low,” she says. “You’re still doing classes online, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, but I’m starting up at work again tomorrow.”
She sighs. “I’m sorry, baby. Just avoid talking to anyone about what happened and keep your head down.”
“Okay.”
“I love you, baby girl. I’m sorry you have to go through this.”
“It’s okay,” I say, trying to convince myself.
Several hours pass, and while I take a lunch break from my school work, Tom’s interview comes up on the newsfeed. I click on it, because yes, I’m a glutton for punishment. He talks about how much he misses me and how I broke his heart by running off with Lucas. Not once does he mention he cheated. He makes me look like the bad guy. Dirtbag.
My phone rings. I don’t recognize the number. I consider not answering, but something tells me I should. “Hello?”
“Hailey, it’s Jeff.”
All air evacuates my body. “Jeff?”
“Hailey, don’t read anything.”
“Um…” I close the tab with Tom’s interview.
“I’m being sent out to see you. The producers want crowd control. They don’t want another big scandal.”
“Ah…but…” Doesn’t he want to expose Steven?
“Trust me. Don’t see or speak to anyone. I’m at the airport now and my flight is about to leave. Tell me quickly what happened.”
Quickly? Well, that’s simple enough. “Tom cheated.”
“Yes, Clarissa and Lucas filled me in on that. Tell me what happened with the girl.”
I tell him everything, including things he probably doesn’t need to know, like how I thought Karen and I were friends, and we’d gone on double dates together. Then I cry. Again.
“Hailey,” Jeff says gently. “This is an unfortunate side effect of suddenly being thrust into fame—you just don’t know how to deal with the media attention. It’s a foreign concept for you. Even people who have built up to it struggle to cope. Don’t feel bad for this. I’m going to meet up with you and we’re going to fix this. I’ll help you prepare a blanket statement for the media and we’ll tell them that’s all they’ll get on the issue.”
“Okay.”
“Your contract states you cannot talk to or interview with anyone without the permission of the producers, so we’ll use that to our advantage.”
I’d forgotten about that.
“They just called for my flight to board. I’ll see you soon.”
“Thanks, Jeff.”
“No problem.”
***
Jeff arrives at my apartment with a string of cars and cameras following him. With wars and poverty in the world, people should have better things to talk about than the destroyed love life of a reality show contestant.
Jeff looks fabulous in his black jeans, white open-collared shirt, and black sunglasses. He still looks like a sexy rocker in his forties. I rush through the apartment to meet him. As I open the door, he pushes me back inside and shuts it, locking it. He closes the blinds and removes his sunglasses.
“This place is a dump.”
“Thanks,” I say, scowling.
“Right, let’s get down to business.” He snatches my laptop from the couch and sits at the dining table. “I’m going to need to know everything, and I mean everything, to build a strong platform to keep Tom quiet.”
I swallow. “What do you mean by everything?”
“I need to know about…everything.”
My chin quivers. “I don’t want that out there.”
His expression softens. “I won’t. You did have sex with him, right?”
My cheeks heat up, and I press my hands against them to cool them. “Yes. He was my first.”
He smiles gently. “That’s good. I can use that.” He pats on the chair beside him. “I’m not going to hurt you. I’m here to help. We’re going to make this go away.”
I take a deep breath and sit beside him.
I talk him through my relationship with Tom more candidly than I have with anyone. As I think back on it, examining events and our interactions in great detail, I see the signs of our eventual failure. He became possessive when I did things he didn’t like, or things I did for myself, making me feel guilty for his insecurities.
But our relationship hadn’t been all bad; in fact, I cry when I think of the good times we shared, or the first time he said he wanted to make me his wife someday.
Then again, in hindsight, I noticed the signs of his cheating. He’d get aroused when Karen and Anthony made out in front of us, and the morning I’d left…he hadn’t taken me to the airport, and Karen, she hadn’t left the apartment! I start to doubt every time he’d told me not to come around because he was busy with schoolwork. Busy with Karen, more like. What a jerk! It makes me sick, and I dart to the bathroom to hurl.
When I return, Jeff types away at my computer. With trembling hands, I open the fridge. “Are you hungry?”
“I’m fine,” he answers quickly. “You should eat something.”
“I don’t feel good.”
“Mmm. You need something in your stomach.”
I grab the bread and butter and make toast. “Jeff?”
“Yes?”
“I think I lucked out when I was assigned to you.”
“It wasn’t luck,” he says without looking up. “We all choose who we work with, to some extent. We can pick our five favorites, then the rest are divvied up between us.”
“So you picked me?”
He nods.
“And the Murphys?”
“Mmmhmm. Although, Drusilla wanted them too. We had a good back-and-forth for a while.”
The toast pops, I butter it, then sit back beside him. “You’re not what I expected.”
“What do you mean?” He glances at me.
“Mom has loved you my whole life. I feel like I’ve always known you, yet you’re not the Jeffrey Halloway I always imagined. You’re a family guy and fairly…normal.”
He chuckles. “Thanks.”
“That came out wrong.”
“Celebrities are just people.”
“Technically.” I run my hand through my hair. “Seriously altered people.”
He chuckles again.
“You just…I feel comfortable with you. I expected that if I ever met you, I’d go all fangirl on you and lose my mind.”
“I’m glad you didn’t.”
“Hmm.” I smile and bite into my toast.
An hour later, he’d written up a statement for me and emailed it to the producers for approval. When they send it back with a go ahead, he sets up a meeting with the local TV station.
That evening, we head into the station’s headquarters for their night show. I read
through my statement over and over, memorizing it carefully. Jeff has done a great job at keeping my sweet, innocent image intact, while giving the facts and remaining tasteful. It never once names Tom, just saying “my boyfriend who I have just broken up with” or something along those lines.
He turns to me before I head in front of the cameras. “I can’t go on with you, and just be careful what you say. Remain sweet, cry a little, look hurt, but not a disaster.”
“Okay.” I nod. I can do this.
“And avoid talking about the Murphys.”
I raise an eyebrow. “What if they ask?”
“Talk about Clarissa briefly and change the subject.”
“Okay.” I take a deep breath. “Do I look okay?”
He smiles. “Yeah.”
My time comes. I head out and sit beside the interviewer. He immediately cuts to the chase. “So you’ve had a rough week. Cut from the show, then coming home to be viciously attacked.”
“It’s been…difficult,” I respond.
“So, what’s the story with that attack?” The host leans forward, his eyes fixed on me.
“I wouldn’t call it an attack,” I answer. “A disagreement. It looks much worse than it was.”
“How do you know her?”
“She was my boyfriend’s roommate’s girlfriend.”
“Was?”
I bite my lip, uneasy about the probing into my personal life. But I need to answer. Tom has spilled his guts, making me look terrible, so I need to defend myself. “My…she was sleeping with my boyfriend.”
“In Tom’s statements earlier, he said he did it because you were cheating on him with both Lucas and Isaiah Murphy.”
Both of them? “No, my friendship is with Clarissa. I don’t see either of them like that.”
“You don’t? But what about all these sightings of you alone with them?”
Am I a UFO or something? Sightings? Really? But I need to change the subject. Jeff told me not to talk about them. “They’re good people. But my ex and I had problems that had nothing to do with them. I’m a fairly private person, and I want to preserve the privacy of everyone involved, so I’ll just say my ex and I had underlying problems that surfaced when I made the choice to go on the show. I’ve struggled these past few days from the things I’ve discovered, and I…” Oh crap, tears. I take a deep breath while he hands me a tissue.
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