They drop me off at the hotel and let me settle in and listen to the basic recordings to start learning my part.
Mom calls me to check in and make sure I’ve arrived safely. When I hang up, I flick through my contacts and stare at Lucas’s name. No, he won’t be my rebound. These feeling are ridiculous. Instead, I call Clarissa.
“Hailey, you’re early today,” she says around a mouthful of food.
“I know. I’m just letting you know I’m in town.”
“What?” She squeals. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner? We have to meet up. Where are you?”
“Didn’t Lucas say anything?”
“No.” Pause. “When did you talk to Lucas?”
Every night all week. “Before the show, remember?”
“Oh yeah. Lucas!”
“Ouch!” He grunts. “What’s that for?”
“Hailey’s in town and you didn’t say anything?”
“Hailey’s in town?” Isaiah says. “Give me the phone.”
“No,” Clarissa snaps. “Mine. Back off.”
She and Isaiah start to argue, and suddenly Lucas speaks clearly. “Hey.”
“Hi.” Butterflies and a goofy grin? Settle down.
“While they’re being really mature, where are you?”
I tell him the hotel.
“Oh, fancy.”
“I know. I have a hot tub.” Why did I tell him that? And why am I now staring at it and picturing us making out in it?
“Very nice.”
My cheeks burn. “Yeah, the view is pretty great too. I can see out over the ocean.”
“Sounds incredible. So what’s your schedule like?”
“I’ll be here nine days,” I say, my fingers brushing over the paperwork. “We start tomorrow. They’re letting me settle in and become familiar with the music.”
“Would you—”
“Hailey!” Isaiah cuts him off. “You should come down here. I miss you.”
“I don’t think I can,” I respond.
“Of course you can.”
“Ugh. Isaiah.” Clarissa returns onto the line. “Tomorrow night we’ll do dinner.”
“Okay,” I answer, my head spinning from being passed from one sibling to the next.
“Excellent! We’ll meet you at the restaurant in the hotel at six.”
“That should be fine.”
“Yay! All right, we gotta go. Bye.” She hangs up.
I set my phone on the desk and decide to use the hot tub. After everything I’ve gone through the past few weeks, I deserve a good soak to wash away all the thoughts and feelings swirling inside me, even for a short while.
I dim the lights and doze off. The room phone rings, startling me awake. The sunlight shines in the windows as the sun sets over the ocean. How long had I been out? As I grab the phone, I glance at the clock. 6:30. Good job, genius, you slept for an hour in the hot tub. “Hello?”
“Hailey Becker?” a female asked.
“Yes.”
“You have a guest at reception.”
“I do?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Do they have a camera?”
“No, ma’am.”
“All right. I’ll be right down.” I hurry to dress. It has to be someone to do with Vanessa, so I don’t want to hold them up. But as I step into the foyer, I freeze. Lucas!
He shoots up from the armchair, beaming. “Hailey. You look a bit red.”
“Oh.” I touch my face. “I fell asleep in the hot tub.”
His eyes sparkle with his amusement. “That was a genius move.”
“Shut up.”
“Come on. Let’s get out of here.” He grabs my hand and pulls me out to a cab.
We have dinner together. He makes me laugh in a way I haven’t in weeks. In response, he laughs at my laughing, and tells me he isn’t that funny. I do feel like a bit of a giddy idiot, so I try to tone it down.
Afterward, we head to a quiet beach. He points to the sand. “Go get us a spot, would you?”
I raise my eyebrows at him. “Because it’s so busy.”
“It is. It’s insane down there.”
I give him a crooked smile. “Are you trying to ditch me?”
“No. I’m going to surprise you.”
“Okay.” I head out to the sand.
The waves crash as I sit and stare ahead, watching the moonlight shimmer on the ocean’s surface. I breathe in deeply. I love the smell of the ocean air. The cool evening breeze helps me relax. I’ve needed this—escaping from my life and the tailspin it’s gone down of late. It’s nice to be somewhere peaceful.
Lucas soon sits beside me, handing me an ice cream. I laugh lightly as he clicks our cones together.
“Ice cream.”
“Yup.” He grins but looks into my eyes, turning serious. “You seem to be doing better than the last time I saw you.”
I nod. “I’ve realized a few things.”
“Like what?”
“For one,” I raise my index finger, “Tom was an idiot.”
He grins. “I told you.”
“I know.” I lick my ice cream. “I also realized how lucky I got. He was trying to convince me to marry him after we graduated, and now I can’t help thinking what kind of awful marriage that would have been. The frightening part is that I would have married him.” I look into Lucas’s eyes. “I can’t believe how pathetic I’ve been.”
“I wouldn’t say pathetic.”
“I would.” I lick at my ice cream again, staring out over the waves. “I look back and I can see a lot has changed in me. I really had no self-respect. I let him and so many other people walk all over me, but not anymore.”
Lucas shifts so his shoulder presses against mine. “What are you going to do?”
I look into his eyes again. “I’m here. I’m taking Vanessa’s offer to be a backup singer for her album and her tour. It could get me a kick start. I may not be Popstar material, but I did get one thing from the show, and that’s that I’m good. I want to see where this road can take me, and I’m not going to let anyone tell me no.”
He nudges me with his shoulder. “Good for you.”
“I’m not going to quit school, though,” I say, leaning against him. “I’m going to finish it online, part-time. I think I can manage that.”
“I think you can too.”
I look up into his eyes. “You know, at first, I thought you were a huge jerk.”
He laughs, staring at his ice cream. “You’ve kind of given me that impression, so I thought about it and it’s probably ’cause I thought you were into Isaiah.”
Switching my ice cream to my other hand, I struggle with asking the question I’ve avoided since we first met. But now feels like a good time to ask since we’re talking candidly. “Why don’t you two get along?”
He shrugs, the muscle in his jaw twitching. “He’s an idiot.”
“And you’re crazy smart.”
He nods, his jaw muscles loosening as he looks back into my eyes. “Yup, I sure am.”
I stare at his lips, an overwhelming urge to kiss him flooding over me. He won’t like it if I do, though. He’ll probably go back to hating me again if I try. I look back into his eyes as his gaze lifts to meet mine.
My hand touches his cheek on its own accord. I flinch it back, but he grabs it, resting it back on his jaw. He stares into my eyes, and my pulse quickens. What’s happening? My breathing becomes deep and fast and I lick my lips. What am I doing? This is Lucas—Lucas. He’s too good for me. He’d never want…
I press my lips against his.
He moans, kissing me for a moment, then pushes back. “Oh, gross.”
I pull away from him, horrified at myself. “Ah, crap.”
“I know.” He grabs a napkin and wipes at the ice cream on his shirt. “Sorry about that. You got some too.”
A patch of ice cream stains my shirt on my boob. I grab a napkin and start wiping, my cheeks flaming. I can’t believe I kissed him! And to make it
worse, I have a huge chocolate stain right on my girls. I launch to my feet, searching for a faucet or something, but seeing none, I rush to the rolling waves.
“Hailey, one second.”
I ignore him. I’m such an idiot. When I reach the moist sand, I kick off my flip-flops and roll up my jeans. I dip the napkin in the water, where it practically dissolves. Growling, I try to wash off the ice cream by scooping up the gritty water. I need to apologize to Lucas somehow, tell him that I shouldn’t have put a strain on our friendship like that. But right at this moment, my humiliation is preventing me from thinking clearly.
“There’s no one around,” he says, far closer than I expect.
I swing around as he pulls off his shirt. Holy mother of hotness! My jaw drops as he bends over and rubs at his shirt in the water. His muscles twitch as he works, his brown skin glistening in the moonlight. My knees quiver. I’ve seen Isaiah shirtless, but Lucas looks much better. He’s fuller, stronger, not so bony. Why is this guy my friend?
“Well?”
“Well what?” I ask breathlessly, unable to stop staring at his back. I’m naming the muscles as I watch them flex—trapezius, latissimus dorsi, rhomboid major…He’s such a perfect specimen, and it’s making my inner nerd crazy.
“Take off your shirt and wash it out.”
I let out a shrill laugh. Take off my shirt when his body looks like that? “No.”
He straightens, turning to me, and I avoid trying to snag a look at his well-formed abdominals and oblique muscles. “No one will see.”
“Just…” I gesture at his shirtless torso. “You.”
“It won’t bother me.” He shrugs his right shoulder, and I watch his trapezius, pectorals, and deltoids move. He looks so much better than any muscle diagrams.
“Ahh…” I turn toward the ocean again, acutely aware that I’m nowhere near as well-defined. I mean, I’m not fat, but I’m not skinny either. “No, I think this will do.”
He hands me his wet shirt. “Here.”
I stare at it. “Here what?”
“Use it to clean up.” He grabs my ice cream and drops his shirt in my hand.
Resigning to my humiliation, I rub his shirt over the stain. “I feel like such an idiot.”
“Why?” he asks with a grin.
“I shouldn’t have done that. You were right to be grossed out.”
“Huh?” He cocks his head.
“I’m sorry I put you in that position. You must feel really awkward right now. I promise I won’t do it again.”
“Get ice cream on me? I hope not.”
“No…” I chew on my lip, unable to look at him. “I don’t want you to feel weird around me. I don’t know what came over me, but your friendship is more important to me than that. I don’t want to ruin things between us.”
He runs his hand through his hair as I watch him out of the corner of my eye. How had I never realized how strongly attracted I am to him? And why did I just put him in such a horrible conflict-of-interest situation?
“Hailey, you didn’t ruin anything.” He turns toward me as I keep my eyes averted, so I’m not running them all over his muscle groups with admiration. “I only pulled back because of the ice cream.”
My face ignites, and the heat creeps down my neck. “I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you somehow. I don’t want you to think I’m using you as a rebound, because that would be so awful. You don’t think that, do you?”
I chance a glance up at him as he stares at me, his body stiff. “Of course I don’t. Hailey—”
“Okay, good.” I toss his shirt at him and march up the beach.
“Hailey, wait.” He hurries behind me. “Don’t be embarrassed. I understand that things are confusing for you right now, and I don’t want to make it worse.”
He grabs my hand and pulls for me to stop. As I turn, our eyes meet.
“Hailey, I…” He steps closer. “I want you to know you’re safe with me. I’m not…We’re friends, and I understand that you’re vulnerable at the moment. I don’t want you to feel like I’m going to take advantage of you too, so…” He rubs his eyes. “Let’s finish these ice creams and pretend it didn’t happen.”
Pretend it didn’t happen? That works for me.
“I’m sorry,” I say, reaching for my ice cream.
“Don’t be sorry.”
My fingers brush over his, sending a tingling up my arm. How long has this been going on? I definitely have strong feelings for him—I can’t deny them any longer—but I can’t pinpoint when they started. With Tom, the attraction had been immediate and we started dating the night we met, but Lucas…
He grasps my elbow. “We’re being watched.”
Following his gaze, I catch a glimpse a photographer disappearing behind a tree. “Oh no.”
“Let’s get out of here.”
We rush to the street and Lucas hails a cab. He watches for anyone following us, and at the hotel, he escorts me to my room.
“I’m fairly sure the hotel security kept whoever it was out,” he says as I dig out my keycard.
“I don’t see why we’re so fascinating,” I mutter, struggling to subdue my annoyance for the invasion of privacy.
“I don’t know,” he says, resting his hand on my back. “You’re pretty interesting. It must be your magnetic personality.”
I roll my eyes, but laugh. “You’re so weird.” I push the door open. “Want to see the luxury?”
He glances in, but shakes his head. “Last time I entered your room, there was underwear on the floor and I walked in on you in the bathroom. I think I’ll pass.”
Confused, I stare at him.
“You don’t remember that? I got locked out when Jessica was being a pain in the corridor…”
“Oh! Oh my gosh! Yes.” I giggle at the embarrassing memory. “That was…mmm.” I step into the room. “Okay.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow, right? You’re meeting us for dinner?”
“Yeah. It’ll be nice to see everyone again.”
He leans over and kisses my forehead. “It will. Bye.”
As he walks away, I shut the door and slide onto the floor. I am completely mad about Lucas! How did this happen? I grasp my hair. Could it simply be a rebound thing? No, I have never felt like this before. But he would never see me that way. He saw me the same way as Clarissa, like a sister needing his protection. Maybe sisterly affection right now is for the best. My heart still aches from Tom’s betrayal. I’m not ready to risk my heart again.
But I touch my mouth, remembering the warmth of his lips. Closing my eyes, I wish with my whole heart we could be more.
***
Vanessa’s voice blends so well with mine, better than I’d realized. She always wanted to work with me, and I wish I had done so on the show. Maybe she would have gone further. Although, knowing what I knew, I’m glad she didn’t. No, she’s in the right place.
“The lyrics aren’t hard,” she says quietly while the team chats together. “Seriously, no wonder people expect less and less from celebrities.”
I giggle.
“If only I could write my own stuff.”
“I’m the same. I don’t have that particular gift. Give me the cellular and atomic structure of a living organism and I’m set, but writing a song…” I shake my head.
She grins. “I didn’t realize you were a nerd. No wonder you and Lucas get on so well.”
“What do you mean?” I ask, trying to subdue the butterflies that plague my stomach at the very mention of his name. “I didn’t know you guys hung out.”
“Oh yeah.” She winks at me. “We’re tight, if you know what I mean. He tells me all kinds of things. He’s probably the most interesting person I met on that show, present company excluded.”
“Thanks.” The butterflies in my belly turn into a sick sensation. “What do you mean by tight?”
“Tight. You know. We talk and stuff.” She twitches her eyebrows with a coy smile.
No, I don’t know; that
’s why I’m asking! He talks to her? Does he call her like he does me? She said she thought he was hot before. She’s naturally pretty with her long brown hair, large brown eyes, and olive skin, but she’s a little abrasive…Why am I getting jealous? If they have a thing going on, I should be happy for them. He sees me like a sister, just like Clarissa. I have no claim on him, and after his last girlfriend cheated, he should have someone who is honest, and upfront, and—
“Hailey? Are you okay?”
I flinch. “What?”
“You totally zoned out.”
“I…sorry.”
“So, what’s the deal with Jeff?”
“Huh?” I stare at Vanessa. Her ability to abruptly change topics throws me into a tailspin. My head is still stuck on her and Lucas.
“Jeff. Everyone knows he totally favored you.”
I clear my throat. “He coached one of those cheating couples last year. He wanted to get over the scandal with me.”
“No.” Her eyes narrow. “Are you sleeping with him?”
I scrunch my nose. “Ew! No. He’s old.”
“Forty-four isn’t old. He does this a lot.” She grasps my chin just like Jeff always does. “And watches you way too much. Haven’t you noticed?”
“He’s married,” I say, feeling uneasy.
“And…”
“No. It’s not like that.” I glance over at the team still chatting away, paying no attention to us, and lean closer. “Can I trust you to not tell a soul?”
She crosses her heart. “Not even the devil will force it from my lips.”
I glance over at the crew again before I whisper, “The show’s rigged. For the last two seasons, the winner was sleeping with Steven. Jeff hates it and wants out. He knew if he pushed me far enough, Steven would come after me but I’d say no. I was eliminated because Steven came on to me and I refused. Jeff’s got a big exposé sting set up for the final that I’m helping with.”
Her eyes widen as she swears. “I knew something was going on. Too many hottie girls made top ten over way more talented guys. Even now, the only guys left in the comp are the Murphys, and Lucas thinks Isaiah is up to no good there.”
I don’t want to talk to her about Lucas. Apparently, she knows more about his opinions than I do. “Don’t tell anyone, okay?”
Quest For A Popstar Page 18
