by Leigh Carman
A couple of hours later, I simply can’t do any more coding. My brain hurts, and my eyes are stinging from staring at the screen too long. Desperate for stress release, I decide to head for the old Ford factory to take advantage of the space before they start ripping it apart to put in those high-end yuppie condos. After a quick change of clothes, I grab water and a banana and shove them into a small pack and bound down the stairs.
Out in the parking lot, the sun warms my skin. It’s cooler than usual for mid-September in LA—low humidity and not a cloud in the bright blue sky. I shouldn’t free run in the middle of the day. It’s too easy to get caught, but my skin is crawling with the need to do something physical. Being cooped up in my apartment most of the week, writing code, while Van’s lack of courtesy nagged at the back of my mind has me ready to burst.
In my parking lot, I unlock my car, and a strange chill sweeps down the back of my neck, making the fine hairs stand on end. Goose bumps prick my arms as the sensation of being watched caresses me like an icy finger.
Austin.
I shiver and hurry to get in the car, my gaze darting around, looking for my ex. My gaze lands on a large figure emerging from a nearby car. Holy shit. I was being watched, just not by my psycho ex.
Seeing no other choice, I climb back out of my car and stare at the other man. “Van?”
Unable to stop myself, I suck in a sharp breath as he approaches. I’m not sure how I forgot how huge Van is. And how utterly, heart-stoppingly gorgeous. He’s wearing an old, faded LA Knights baseball cap and dark wraparound sunglasses, but I’d recognize that body anywhere. The confidence in his stride, the power contained in those muscles—they’re imprinted on my brain forever.
“Toby,” he says, his voice draping across my body like a silk sheet, the smooth tones sending a tingling sensation over my skin.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, shifting from foot to foot while gripping my pack.
“I’ve, uh, been sitting in my car trying to get the courage to go upstairs and knock on your door.” Van shoves his hands in the pockets of his jeans and hunches his shoulders over a little.
“You were afraid to see me?” I ask, baffled. How can this enormous, intimidating, and powerful man be afraid of me?
Van removes his sunglasses so I can see those brilliant green eyes. They lock onto mine, unwavering as he speaks. “I was afraid you’d send me away again.”
Wow. For a man so physically imposing to admit I have power over him is daunting—and flattering.
“Were you going to come up to see me?” I ask.
Van glances away, his lips pressed in a tight line. When he focuses back on my face, our gazes lock once more. “Yes. I have to, Toby. I have no choice. I find I can’t stay away from you.”
The heat of his heavy stare has me melting right there in the parking lot. The desire to have those strong arms around me is close to overwhelming. Of course, we’re in public, so I can’t touch him. He’s not out, I remind myself.
I tilt my head and look at him curiously, wondering if he’d be up for a little outing. “Will you come with me?” I ask.
“Where are you going?”
“Does it matter?”
Van blinks but answers immediately. “No.”
Grinning, I climb into my car and wait. Van opens the passenger side and folds his huge body into my tiny compact sedan. His scent fills the space, heady and intoxicating. I struggle to keep from leaning over the console to bury my nose in his neck and breathe it in until my head spins.
Van fights with the lever to slide the seat back, cursing under his breath until it catches and he pushes back. Even moving it as far back as it goes, his legs are bent, knees touching the dash.
“Maybe we should take my truck,” he says, frowning.
I start the car and reverse out of the spot. “I think not being in control of everything all the time will be good for you.” Van gives me an indecipherable look, one eyebrow raised. I pull out into traffic, smiling at his inability to let go. “Do you trust me?”
Van’s tight muscles relax a fraction. His posture becomes less rigid. “I do.” He’s silent for a moment. “Do you trust me, Toby?”
“I don’t know,” I reply honestly. “I’d like to.”
I catch Van nodding out of the corner of my eye. We continue in silence toward the old factory. We’re almost there when his huge hand covers my knee, and he gives it a hesitant squeeze. Electricity shoots straight to my groin from his touch, from the searing heat of his skin on my bare leg. I smile and Van grins, keeping his hand on my thigh for the rest of the ride.
“What the hell is this place?” Van asks when I park, staring at the abandoned and pretty dilapidated industrial site.
“You’ll see.” I point at the ladder for the old fire escape. “If you want to follow, use that.”
“What are you—?”
Before he can finish, I break out in a run, headed straight at the cinder block wall. When I hit it, I run up the side and execute a backflip onto the pavement, effortlessly landing on my feet. I shoot Van a wide grin before carving a path up the side of the building, running and jumping, swinging and tumbling, reveling in the rush of adrenaline until I’m on the roof.
“Toby!”
I stick my head over the side of the building where Van is still on the ground, his face angry and a pretty hideous combination of purple and red.
“Are you coming?” I call out, basking in the exhilaration that comes with free running.
“No. Get down here right now!” His voice is loud and demanding and borderline frantic. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say Van was somewhere between pissed and scared shitless.
“All right. Be right there. You sure you don’t want to come up? The view is beautiful.”
“No!”
What the hell is his problem?
I flip and swing and leap my way to the ground, doing a front double flip off the fire escape. No sooner do my feet hit than Van runs over and grabs my face in his big hands. His eyes are wide and his nostrils are flaring. I notice the hair curling behind his ears beneath the baseball cap is damp with sweat.
“Are you okay?” Van’s wide eyes scan my entire body up and down, checking me for injuries.
“I’m fine, Van. I’ve been doing parkour for years.”
“Don’t ever do that to me again,” he says, his voice catching. “Just the thought of you falling….” Van cuts off his chastising and hauls me to his chest, wrapping his thick arms tight around me. I melt into the embrace, my cheek to his chest as I listen to the rapid hammering of his heart. Van’s large body is trembling around me.
Shit. He really was afraid I would get hurt.
I put my arms around his waist and close my eyes, reveling in how right this feels, holding each other close. Van tucks his nose into my hair and inhales. He drops a small kiss on the top of my head before pulling away.
“I’m sorry, Van. This is something I do a lot. I didn’t know it would upset you.”
Once again, his face turns crimson and he ducks his head. “I don’t like heights, okay?”
I smother a smile. My big, brave football player has a weakness, and it’s fucking adorable. “Okay, Van. I understand.”
Van’s head whips back to me, confusion on his face. “You do?”
“Yes. If you don’t like heights, I’ll keep my running to lower levels.” I point at the old factory. “This is going to be off-limits in a few weeks anyway.”
Van gives me a hesitant smile before exhaling in relief. I can literally feel the stress leave his body, each tight muscle relaxing under my hands. “Thanks, Toby.”
“Come on. Let’s go.”
We both climb into the car, Van occupying more than his share of space. Before I start the engine, Van slides a big rough hand behind my neck and hauls me across the console for a kiss. What starts out soft and sweet quickly turns into a heated tangle of tongues and heavy moans. Van sucks on my lower lip before he releases me and si
ts back in his seat.
“How fast can you drive?” he rasps.
I glance down at the bulge running down one leg of his jeans, and my own hard-on throbs painfully.
“Pretty damn fast.”
Van
DESPITE THE fact that his tiny sedan isn’t new or particularly flashy, Toby tears through the streets and has us back at his place in record time. It’s nearly impossible to keep my hands off him as we hustle up the stairs and tumble into his apartment.
The second the door closes behind us, I grab Toby roughly and spin him, pressing his back against the wall, trapping him with my bulk. The myriad of emotions coursing through my veins has me confused and near desperate to be inside him, to make Toby mine. To make sure he’s unharmed after watching Toby pull his stupid stunt. One that likely stripped me of a few years of life. I descend on his plump, parted lips, plunging my tongue inside forcibly, demanding entry. Toby groans and sinks into me, his supple muscles relaxing as I claim every inch of his welcoming mouth.
Toby moans, deep and low, the sexy, cock-hardening sounds resonating from his chest, sending tingling vibrations over my skin. I tear my mouth away and grip his head in my hands, pressing our foreheads together.
“Don’t ever scare me like that again,” I insist, gasping as I catch my breath and try to contain the overwhelming rush of fear at the thought of losing Toby in some kind of freak accident.
He tips his head back, those crystalline blue eyes staring at me, clouded with lust. Toby blinks to clear his thoughts, his eyes shimmering with moisture. “I’m sorry, Van. I-I didn’t know.”
What doesn’t he know? That I’m afraid of heights? Or that I’m in so goddamn deep I’m scared shitless of losing him?
It’s not a question I want to think about answering right now, so instead of speaking, I kiss him again. Our hands begin to wander. Toby slides his up under my shirt, gliding his fingertips over my abs and up to my chest. He brushes those wicked fingers over my nipples, and I grunt, pulling away from his mouth to bite at the tight cords of his neck. When Toby pinches both of my nipples simultaneously, my already hard cock pulses and my hips instinctively rut against his, seeking relief.
“Fuck, I need you so much, Toby,” I murmur against the soft skin and hard tendons of his neck before moving down to his shoulder. “Need to be inside you, make you mine.”
“Take me, Van,” Toby breathes, arching his back off the wall to dig his own erection into mine as he moves his hands around my sides to claw at my back.
I suck at the sensitive skin at the juncture of Toby’s neck and shoulder, loving the loud, desperate noises coming from his throat. I grip his firm ass, massaging and squeezing one tight round cheek in each palm. His ass is fantastic. If I could, I’d build it a shrine and worship it each day.
Toby hikes a leg up around my waist and winds both arms around my neck. I take the not so subtle hint, lifting him off the ground, holding on to that perfect bubble butt, and carry him in my arms.
“Bedroom?” I ask as I nip at Toby’s flushed red lips.
“Left,” he murmurs between kisses. Toby threads his hands up into the short hairs at the nape of my neck, gently tugging at first, slowly increasing the force of each pull until a sharp pain sends a jolt of electricity straight to my leaking dick.
Unable to wait any longer, I burst into Toby’s bedroom and toss him on the bed, where he bounces. “Naked. Now.” I don’t wait for an answer and begin to remove my own clothes. By the time I notice Toby hasn’t moved, I’m already down to my briefs, my cock pressed hot and hard into my abdomen, restricted by the tight fabric.
Toby is staring, eyes wide as his gaze wanders up and down my torso where it stops at my groin. I rub a hand over my stiff length through the gray fabric and raise a brow. “Like what you see?”
Toby’s gaze shoots to mine, and his stunning face turns bright red. Impatient, I kneel on the bed and grab the hem of his shirt. He raises his arms to help me take it off. I skate my fingers down his nearly hairless chest, over the ridges of his abs, and grip his waistband. Toby lifts his hips, and I yank the rest of his clothes off and throw them on the floor.
“God, you’re fucking gorgeous.” I stand and stare at the man lying on his back on the bed, wondering how I got so lucky to have him here with me.
“Off,” he rasps, reaching for my briefs.
I chuckle and quickly slide out of them, kicking the gray fabric aside. The urgent, near desperate need to skip the foreplay and drive right into Toby has calmed some, the roaring fire now burning low and hot, like glowing embers instead of a roaring inferno. I want to enjoy every second, explore every line of Toby’s body. Taste, touch… feel. Slowly, I lower myself on top of Toby, take his face in my hands, and line up our cocks. Toby hisses at the exquisite contact and wraps his legs around my waist.
“I missed you,” I murmur, pressing small kisses to his face and throat. The dark purple mark I made on his neck turns me on in an animalistic way, waking a part of me I never knew existed. Possessive. Protective. Primal. I lave my tongue over the inflamed spot and sink my teeth into it again. Toby arches off the bed, sliding his dick along mine. “Shit, Toby.” I let out a deep growl when the head of his cock rubs along the sensitive underside of mine.
“I want you, Van.” Toby grips my head, tugging me down for a deep, passionate kiss. Our tongues tangle, hot and wet, and Toby sucks my tongue into his mouth.
I shudder, and a groan rumbles in my chest as Toby makes love to my mouth, sucking on my tongue as if it were my cock. My muscles tense and tighten, sparks crackling and zipping down my spine. The pressure gathers and coils tight in my balls much too soon. I tear my mouth away and push to my knees between Toby’s thighs.
“Please,” Toby begs, spreading his legs and pulling them back with his hands, presenting his ass to me in a blatant invitation.
I place my palm over Toby’s heart and love how huge my hand looks on his chest. “Toby, do you feel it in here?” With my other hand, I grip his cock and squeeze, dragging a long, slow pull along the length. “Or just here?”
I have no idea why I’m trying to get Toby to admit his feelings. Especially in bed. I don’t do feelings. Ever. But the thought of Toby dismissing me again after today…. As much as I want him, I’d rather walk away now than have him treating this as mindless sex, when for me, it’s anything but.
Toby’s eyes glisten, and the tendons of his neck flex as he swallows. “Both.” His voice is husky and so low I can barely hear him rasp the word.
“Me too,” I admit, never breaking eye contact with the gorgeous man who is entrusting me with his heart. I don’t deserve it, he has to know that, but here we are, admitting that whatever we have is more than a one-off or a quick fuck.
I’m in uncharted territory here, and nerves have my hands shaking as Toby opens a side drawer and hands me lube and a condom. Toby is as calm as ever on the outside, but his eyes tell me he’s as afraid to go down this road as I am.
Toby is a braver man than me, because he stares right at me as he says, “Make love to me, Van.”
Chapter 8
Toby
VAN IS frozen, condom in one hand, lube in the other, staring at me as if in shock. My pulse is thrumming, and I worry maybe I misunderstood his question and shouldn’t have asked him to make love to me.
Then I take a closer look, really study the man in my bed, and what Van doesn’t say speaks volumes. Van opens the condom, and I watch his big hand tremble as he rolls the latex down his thick length. Van’s tongue makes a nervous swipe across his lips as he clicks open the bottle of lube and pours some on his fingers. When Van leans over me, capturing my mouth with his, I feel the rush of powerful emotions behind his actions.
He’s as afraid of this as I am.
Before I can think anymore, Van’s cold fingers slip between my cheeks, his slick fingertip circling my hole. I gasp into Van’s mouth when he presses a single finger inside and gently wiggles it, pushing it in and out to loosen the
tight muscles. I need to be grounded so I don’t fly apart, so I grip the back of Van’s neck and cling to him, alternating between kissing his mouth and panting in quick, shallow breaths as Van adds a second finger and begins stretching me.
I arch my back and lick across his full lips. “More. I want more.”
Van sits back and adds more lube to his hand, then slicks up his considerable length. He pushes my other leg back toward my chest, and I grab it eagerly, holding myself open like a pathetic, needy slut. Van’s nostrils flare, and his wide chest heaves as he stares at my hole, exposed and ready. The lust in his eyes has me rock hard and feeling empty.
“Fuck, you’re so goddamn perfect, Toby.”
“Hurry,” I beg. My cock is aching, precome dripping from the swollen red tip onto my belly at a steady pace.
Blown pupils surrounded by a sliver of green hold me captive in their trance. “I’ll give you what you need, baby. Don’t worry.”
My pulse falters at Van’s endearment, but it’s quickly forgotten when he shoves two fingers deep in my channel and simultaneously grips my dick with his other hand. Van slowly jerks me as he pegs my prostate over and over with those wicked fingers.
“Fuck!” My hips fly off the bed, and I press my head back into the mattress. He adds another finger, continuing his maddening, drawn-out torture to my ass while stroking my cock. My body is buzzing with pleasure, the intense sensations making me shake and tremble as my muscles tense and relax with each one of his deliberate taps on that magical spot inside me until I’m a sweaty, desperate wreck. “Now, Van! Please. I’m ready.” He hits my prostate one more time, and I cry out as my body spasms. I curl up and fist a hunk of his hair, holding him so we’re eye to eye. “Fuck me. Now.”
Van’s eyes are hooded and dark with lust. He pushes me back down on the bed, and his torturous fingers retreat. Van immediately replaces his fingers with the broad head of his cock. He braces one hand next to my ear as he lines up and slowly presses forward. I stare at his handsome face, mouth slack, heavy-lidded with ecstasy, and my heart stumbles again. I reach for him involuntarily, needing the contact. When I gently cup his cheek, Van’s eyes open, pupils so wide the bright green is nearly gone. We stare at each other as he continues pushing into me, finally breaching the tight internal barrier. Van clenches his teeth, moving until I feel his hard thighs touch mine and his balls brushing against my ass.
