Holding Smoke

by Steph Post

  Now Shelia, Judah didn’t quite have her figured out yet. She’d once helped the Scorpions drag Benji down the highway behind a Harley, but had then gone on to warn Ramey about Weaver and had even saved her life when the pair had tried to take him on in a diner up in Callahan. She’d been there, too, on the morning Weaver had come for them at this very house, men and guns blazing, and Judah had done what needed to be done. So despite her mercurial nature, Shelia was part of it all now, as were Alvin and Gary, Judah’s high school friends turned recent Cannon family recruits, who had taken lives that morning as well. With Gary sitting on the countertop next to the sink, Alvin hulking in the corner, and Shelia leaning in the doorway, checking her hair for split ends, they were all back together. Everyone who had stood out on the front porch with him in the bloody aftermath of Weaver’s attack and everyone he hoped would now stand beside him as he resumed his rightful place as the head of the Cannon family.

  Judah brought his gaze back around to Ramey. She’d stopped chewing on her lip and was now working her jaw as she raised one eyebrow expectantly. Ramey had already voiced her opinion earlier about how she thought having this meeting on his first night back was tempting fate. She couldn’t understand, though, what it was like to have been locked up for the past two months, living off rumors and hearsay, tidbits of information doled out to him like breadcrumbs. He knew Ramey had done her best to keep him informed, but he wasn’t sure she had been telling him everything, either. Judah had known that before he could do anything, he needed to have everyone together in the same room, look each one in the eye, and know for sure whether or not they were looking back.

  Judah curled his knuckles and nodded to Ramey. He had just opened his mouth when Levi scraped his chair back obnoxiously to give himself more legroom and growled from the end of the table.

  “Jesus, Judah. You going to give a speech or what? If I’d known this was going to be such a formal event, I might’ve found me a tie somewhere. Shined up my shoes. Hell, you got a look on your face like you’re headed to a funeral. Thought we was all going to a party after this.”

  Ramey whipped her head around, but Benji snapped at him first.

  “Leave him alone, Levi. He just got out of jail. Judah took the fall for all of us.”

  Levi sneered.

  “Yeah, he’s pretty good at that. Though I seem to recall that our boy Judah here was more than just the getaway driver this time. Manned up and took that psycho Weaver out point blank.”

  Levi cocked his fingers up like guns and pointed them at Judah.

  “I was there, ’member? I seen it. Up close and personal.”

  Benji leaned forward and gripped the edge of the table. Judah had noticed earlier that the opioid-induced sheen was gone completely from his brother’s eyes. The haze had disappeared, but so, too, had the sparkle. Benji’s famous blue eyes had a hard edge to them now.

  “And I seem to recall you disappeared on us for three months. Just poof, gone. Then you show back up once the smoke’s cleared and it’s all safe for you to come out. Like a real champ.”

  “You kidding me? This coming from the kid who’s still limping around like a three-legged dog? I bet the girls just love you now, huh? How many phone numbers you—”

  “Oh, shut the hell up. Both of you.”

  Benji and Levi simultaneously turned to glare at Shelia, rolling her eyes in the doorway. She cocked her hip out and shook her head.

  “You boys can find a sandbox to roll around in later. Judah asked us here and I, for one, would like to hear what he’s got to say.”

  She directed her smirk straight at Benji.

  “If it ain’t too much to ask.”

  Gary whistled and banged one leg against the cabinet beneath him. Ramey was still staring hard at Judah, though. Eyebrows arched, impatient, but otherwise expressionless. Her low voice silenced the grumbling and stifled the laughter around her.

  “Judah?”

  Good. No more bullshit.

  “I’ll make this quick. I’m out of jail, obviously. And the charges have been dropped. Against me, against all of us.”

  Alvin abruptly turned away from staring out the window.

  “For everything?”

  Judah nodded.

  “Everything. The Stand Your Ground law was going to make prosecuting me for killing Weaver too difficult since it was clear he attacked us at our house. It took some persuasion on Rick Bell’s part, and some deep pockets filled by Dodger, but the state attorney’s office has formally dropped all charges. We’re clear.”

  “And ATF?”

  Judah turned to Benji.

  “ATF is off our backs, too. According to Bell, they matched the bullet that killed Agent Grant to Weaver’s Beretta. And since Weaver was already dead, they closed up shop on the case and hightailed it back to Atlanta. I guess that agent didn’t have any business being down here harassing us. Never got the right clearance, had no place being on our doorstep to begin with. It sounded to me like ATF thought the showdown was between Grant and Weaver and we just happened to get caught in the crossfire. I certainly weren’t going to correct them.”

  Levi smirked.

  “Got to love those alphabet soup bureaucracies.”

  “Well, the red tape worked out in our favor this time. And now it’s all in the rearview.”

  Benji drummed his fingers on the table.

  “Okay, so now what?”

  Judah braced his arms out against the edge of the table.

  “Now, we talk about the present. Levi?”

  Judah turned directly to his older brother. He’d let him get his gibes in, let him glower and sneer in the beginning, because he’d already figured out the best way to handle Levi. Give him an inch, then ask him to walk a mile. Judah had spent years watching his father use Levi as his right-hand man. Levi was a bully, born and bred, so there was no use trying to browbeat or muscle him back. He wasn’t as stupid as he looked, either. Judah had learned that the hard way one too many times and had the scars to prove it. But Judah knew that Levi had an odd vein of vanity that could be deftly manipulated. Sherwood had said it himself once to Judah, that Levi was a born follower who only wanted a nip at power every now and then, but never the whole hog. Never the responsibility of leadership and all the complications that went with it. The catbird seat was the sweet spot where Levi thrived.

  Levi, taken off guard slightly, sat up straight and leaned his burly shoulders forward.

  “You asking about Daytona?”

  “I’m asking about Daytona.”

  Levi glanced uneasily around the room, as if suddenly aware everyone was looking at him and waiting. He grunted and scratched at the strange gray streak he’d had in his dark hair since he was in high school.

  “Well, I was just down there last night, but I been a few times before, too. All up and down the beach. That Weaver, man, he had it going on. Half his operations are running out the back of strip joints. And let me tell you, those clubs out there ain’t nothing like the ones ’round these parts.”

  Levi turned to Shelia. If looks could kill, Levi would already be halfway in the ground. Judah knew he’d get an earful from Ramey about it later, but he didn’t rein his brother in. Levi’s lip curled, but he turned back to Judah.

  “I guess when Weaver went down, all the guys beneath him began tearing his business up, ripping off pieces in a feeding frenzy. This last trip out there I got in with this one dude pretty good, so I got the lowdown on the fallout. Some tweaker named Travis come out on top. You ever meet him, Judah? I seen him on the other side of the stage at one of the clubs and I swear, even Benji here could take him.”

  Judah’s expression didn’t change.

  “I’ve met him. Do you think he’s coming after us?”

  Levi smacked the table and laughed.

  “Shit, Judah. He did see you, he’d probably buy you one of them pansy-ass fruit drinks with a damn neon umbrella stuck in it. Only time I heard me
ntion of the Cannons down in Daytona, they was singing our praises.”

  Judah narrowed his eyes.

  “Seriously?”

  “Seriously. The way they talk about us, you done them a favor. Think about it. You knocked off the head honcho and everybody got a little extra on the side. I don’t think Weaver had too many friends out there. Or, not no friends who would bother to say ‘boo’ about him turning into worm food. You ain’t got to worry about beef coming from that quarter, little brother.”

  Judah nodded.

  “Well, that’s a relief.”

  “But now, I been thinking—”

  “No.”

  Ramey’s voice punched the air between them. Levi cut his eyes at her, as if he’d been expecting this interruption. It was the first time that night Judah had seen him look at her directly.

  “Now listen here, princess. Judah’s home and he got a right to hear what I got to say. Just ’cause you ain’t like the idea, don’t mean nothing. ’Sides, I don’t talk to him now, I’m just going to do it later, when you ain’t around. You know, when we hold a family meeting that’s just for family.”

  It was a struggle, but Judah kept his cool.

  “She’s family.”

  Levi deliberately propped his elbow on the table to block Ramey. Out of the corner of his eye, Judah could see her fuming, but he tried to listen to what his brother had to say.

  “Now just hear me out, Judah. With everything going on, those folks out in Daytona are just ripe for the taking. I already made some in-roads with a few guys and all we got to do is just—”

  Judah could see exactly where this was going and why Ramey had such a strong objection to it.

  “No. No, Levi we can’t go there. Not yet.”

  Benji sat up straight and leaned forward eagerly.

  “Wait, what’s this? What’re y’all talking about?”

  Judah shook his head, keeping his eyes on Levi.

  “We got too much we need to focus on here.”

  Levi’s voice rose as he flung himself sullenly back in his chair.

  “That’s why we need to strike now. That’s why—”

  “Wait, guys—”

  “Hey, now—”

  “We’re broke.”

  The acid in Ramey’s tone bit through the rising grumble from Levi, protests from Benji, and the mutterings and mumblings coming from Alvin, Gary, and Shelia behind her. Judah could tell from the look in her eyes, she’d had enough. Of the conversation, of the meeting, of the evening. Her arms and legs were crossed and she was coiled as tightly as a spring. He was glad she was around to keep them straight, but he hoped she could see what he was trying to do. Ramey’s temper could be a slow burn, but a wildfire once it got going. He tried to catch her eye to steady her, but she was alternately glaring back and forth at his two brothers on either end of the table. Levi’s eyes were calculating and Benji was squirming, but she held them both still with the jut of her chin and that viperous glint in her eyes.

  “We’re broke, everyone. You might as well all know. We were stretched tight before, trying to balance things out with the bookies and the bars and the runs, but it cleaned us out to keep Judah out of prison. To keep all our asses out of prison. We did what we had to do to be sitting in this room right now, but there was a cost. We’re dead, flat broke and then some.”

  Ramey slid her chair back and stood up.

  “So now you know. Do with that what you will. I need a cigarette. And some air.”

  From behind Ramey, Shelia nodded vigorously.

  “You and me both.”

  Ramey stalked around the kitchen table, brushing past Judah without so much as a side glance as she headed for the back door. Behind her, Shelia shot Judah a reproachful look and followed Ramey out. Levi broke into a wide grin as he heard the screen door slam and pretended to wipe a sheen of sweat from his forehead.

  “Well, now that the skirts are done putting their two cents in, we can talk business like men. Make some real decisions.”

  Levi nodded to Alvin and Gary and waved his hand toward Ramey’s empty chair as if to invite one of them to sit down. Alvin ignored Levi completely and Gary glanced warily at Judah, but didn’t move. He wished to God he’d listened to Ramey and not called the stupid family meeting in the first place. Judah suddenly remembered a scene from his teenage years—his father holding court at the poker table in the Cannon Salvage garage, surrounded by his goons and cronies, bickering and arguing, and Sherwood sitting over it all like a drunken lord. Ramey’s father had been Sherwood’s right hand at that time, but Levi, already grown, wasn’t far behind. Judah could remember Levi lounging in one of the open bay doors, joining in the conversation, while he and Benji worked on an engine out in the yard. Sherwood had started including Judah on runs by that point, just odd jobs that mostly involved sitting in the truck and keeping a lookout, but Judah had been privy to the meetings only from a distance. Now Judah had to wonder. How had Sherwood kept it together? The men jockeying for position around him, some needing to be pulled up, others pushed down, all kept in line, straight as ducks in a row. Judah had never before thought about how his father had managed it all. He had never wanted to, never needed to. And yet here Judah was, sitting on top of the rubble pile of his inheritance. He could rebuild the castle or turn his back and let it slide into the sea. He knew what Ramey wanted him to do. He had seen it in her eyes the moment he’d stepped out of jail that afternoon. But he had made his choice.

  He would not rebuild his father’s legacy. Neither would he destroy it. He would forge something new. Something that would rise from the vestiges. Something he could name as his own.

  Judah balled his hands into fists and rested his knuckles on the top of the table as he leaned forward, making himself clear.

  “We’re not settling on any decisions tonight. We’re safe. We’re in the clear with the law and in the clear with Weaver’s men. And we’re in this together. That’s the reason I asked you to come, that’s what needed to be said. And I said it. Meeting adjourned.”

  Benji looked around, confused.

  “That’s it?”

  Levi thumped his fist on the table like a gavel.

  “That’s it, little brother. Judah’s called it a night.”

  There was a clear slash of malice in Levi’s voice as he leered at Judah.

  “Guess we can give him a break. Boy did just get out of jail a few hours ago.”

  Levi reached out to slap him on the back, but Judah had already moved, resting his hand on Benji’s shoulder.

  “Good to see you walking on your own, Benji.”

  Benji fumbled for his cane and slowly got to his feet.

  “Almost, anyway.”

  Gary slid down from the counter and followed Benji and Levi out, Alvin lagging, his cellphone to his ear. Judah could hear him tell someone, probably his girlfriend Kristy, that they were on their way. The four were already horsing around loudly on the front porch—it sounded like someone had just gone over the railing into Ramey’s hydrangeas—when the back screen door squealed open behind Judah. Shelia popped her tangerine lips as she walked past. She capped a tube of lipstick and shoved it deep down into her Louis Vuitton knockoff before rubbing her hands briskly up and down her prickling arms.

  “You two coming to the party?”

  Judah glanced over his shoulder toward the closed screen door and shook his head.

  “Nah. I think we’ve had enough fun for one evening.”

  Shelia nodded her approval and tugged on her messy blond ponytail.

  “Good for you. It’s probably going to suck anyhow. All the way up near Raiford, at one of Levi’s friend’s place. Which means a lot of jailbait and overage frat boys, I’m guessing.”

  “Why’re you going, then?”

  Shelia shrugged and looked away from him.

  “Free beer. And Benji’s truck wouldn’t start, so I’m his ride.”

  Judah cracked
half a smile.

  “All this time and you two still haven’t managed to kill each other?”

  Shelia lowered her eyelashes coyly.

  “Who says I ain’t still waiting for the chance?”

  Judah couldn’t help but grin. It was true, he’d tried to strangle her once. But at this point, he’d pretty much given up trying to keep score. Shelia was one of them now and that was that. Benji was hollering for her from the porch and she blew Judah a kiss, turning to go, but suddenly spun around. Her face was deathly serious.

  “It’s been rough on her, Judah. You being locked up. Dealing with all this mess on her own. The business. Your brothers. Everything else.”

  Judah started to come back with a quip about how it hadn’t been easy being in jail for two months either, but the sober look on Shelia’s face stopped him. She was trying to tell him something important. He clamped his mouth shut and only nodded instead. Shelia glanced toward the front porch where she could hear the guys shuffling around, banging their boots on the railing and goofing off. Almost as if she’d read his mind, she frowned.

  “I know it weren’t a cakewalk being in jail, neither. But sometimes it’s those wide-open spaces that can scare us the most, you know? A road that’s got no end ain’t always a welcome sight. Especially if you don’t know in which direction you’re even headed.”

  “Okay.”

  Shelia’s frown deepened.

  “And take care of her. Not the way you want. The way she needs to be.”

  Judah shook his head.

  “I don’t follow you.”

  Shelia sighed and hitched her purse higher up on her bare shoulder.

  “And ain’t that just the way of the world. Night, Judah.”

  He started to ask her what she meant, but it was all too much, too soon. He didn’t have the energy.

  “Night, Shelia.”

  Shelia headed out without another glance back. Judah stood alone in the kitchen, listening to the sound of car doors slamming. Levi cursing and Shelia shrieking at Benji to hold his goddamn horses. Engines revved and tires spun and then the commotion grew faint until he could only hear the crickets clicking away at him through the open windows. He dropped his head into his hands and breathed deeply for a moment. He could wonder what the hell he was doing later. He lifted his head and ran his hands back through his hair and shook out his shoulders. Right now, he needed Ramey. And, for better or worse, it sounded like she needed him even more.