by E. Paul Zehr
MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 15
Today in Science we had a mongo, uber convo about how we could get extra credit this year by working science into our Superhero Slam projects. Audrey got so excited she was almost bursting. But I was having a bit of trouble processing this.
I was still overwhelmed by thoughts of a year-long project! It’s starting to sink in. When I got my science brain thinking again, Mr. Richardson was asking us to consider nature and nurture.
Mr. Richardson: “Are we born or made?” Which made me think about Socials and Ms. King asking the same thing about heroes. I think my teachers are all obsessing a bit too much on the same question! But on the upside, maybe that means I only have to think about one answer!
“What do you think, Cade?” Mr. Richardson asked while floating over to my pal on the other side of the class. Cade, after an initial blank look, said, “Um. Both maybe? Do I have to pick one?”
Mr. Richardson started laughing so hard and got very excited. We all thought he was going to pass right out in class. I think he may have hopped around a little bit even.
“That’s it! Exactly! That’s the right approach. Do you have to pick one? It’s the question science has been asking for many years now, for centuries actually . . .” And then he kind of went off on another tangent about the history of science.
Cade and I made faces at each other across the room. He pretended to dramatically wipe sweat off his forehead for giving Mr. Richardson a good answer, so I shot him a quick thumbs-up.
Cade’s pretty cool. He likes comics and science. And he’s pretty sporty. He likes water wet as a swimmer and frozen as a snowboarder. He’s also a great basketball player. He is always carrying a basketball around with him. But then so is Dylan, so let’s not dwell too much on that.
Cade and I have been friends forever. Dylan and I, pretty much the opposite. But again, let’s not dwell.
Back to the big questions. Mr. Richardson seemed to be saying the questions raised more questions. Huh? I guess we are supposed to have more answers by the end of the school year.
While Cade and I were having our moment, I saw Audrey busy scribbling away in her notebook. Scribbling like crazy. She was working so fast and so hard I thought the paper was going to burst into flames! In fact, I think I saw flames coming out of the bottom of a sketch Audrey was working on. The bit I saw looked like a robot or something. She looked up, gave me a little grin and eyebrow raise, and closed her notebook.
Anyway, all that talk of nature (me being born as me), nurture (me being shaped into me), and then heroes (could I be one?) had me all jazzed up when the bell went off.
Me: “Hey Audrey! How about the — ”
Audrey: “Superhero Slam? I know, right? I never thought we’d get such a cool project in Socials! And we can use SCIENCE TOO!”
Me: “Uh, yeah. That’s what I was going to say.”
Cade: “Can’t wait to get home and tell my brother — again! — to keep his hands off my comic book collection! But now I have a real school project to enforce the rule. I’m going to need them all for my research.”
He finished off with a high five with Audrey. I tried to join in but he didn’t see me holding up my hand, so I turned it into a kind of awkward wave.
As I drifted off for the next class and Cade and Audrey went off to swim practice (she joined the team this year), a big question hit me — KAPOW! Do I have any little bit of hero inside of me? How can I figure that out?
WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 17
Dylan. Is. Such. A. Pain. I know I just need to ignore him, but sometimes it’s SO HARD. Like today when Cade, Audrey, and me were all talking about the Superhero Slam. Dylan wandered by, listened in for a bit, and then told me I could never be a real superhero. Say what?? He said I was definitely in the “sidekick category” and then walked away. This made me very mad, which I showed to the whole world by . . . not saying anything at all. Audrey moved to go after him but I pulled her back. I told them to just ignore Dylan.
But then I thought about it. What would it really be like to be a superhero?
Everyone plays dress-up these days — Halloween, comic book conventions, whatever. People like to pretend to be superheroes. But I can’t get Mike Bruen’s visit out of my head. He was talking about REAL HEROES. And superheroes are heroes with some added powers and stuff. Ms. King had me thinking, Could I be a hero? I could use the Superhero Slam to see what it takes to be a superhero, and then see if I have what it takes to be a hero — a superhero minus the superpower.
And then I’ll show Dylan I’m no sidekick!
It would be a lot of work, but my dad always says if it is worth doing, it is worth doing well. Sometimes dads ARE actually right. Yep. SOME of the time dads are right. But each and every time they are, it’s annoying. I might as well go all the way with this mission — let’s call it Project Superhero — and really feel what it would be like to be a superhero. I mean, there probably won’t be any fighting of supervillains (at least I hope not!), but maybe I can learn to run faster, speak up more, and kick butt.
And if I wind up with a fantastic mark on the Superhero Slam AND prove to Dylan that he’s wrong about me, how good will that feel?!
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 18
I like pretty much all comic book superheroes, but my favorites are the ones I can relate to, like Batman or Iron Man. They are just people. People with lots of technology and loads of training, but still people.
Don’t get me wrong, Superman is good (I ALMOST wrote “super”). Wolverine is wild. I like the X-Men. Storm is smashing, and Rogue rocks. Invisible Girl has some great powers. Like — she’s invisible! That would be so handy at school! I can seriously relate to wanting to have some AMAZING powers.
But I can’t actually relate to some superheroes because I can’t experience things the way they do, no matter what. I can’t be born on Krypton like Superman or have an adamantium skeleton like Wolverine. (Even Wikipedia says adamantium doesn’t exist. Yet.) Or control the weather like Storm. Or be invisible like Invisible Girl. But being human, I can do that!
But which super-human superhero is right for me? Which one should the “New Jessie” try to be? I think comic books hold the answer. Archie, step aside. Betty and Veronica, talk to the hand. I need some heavy hitters.
So here’s my strategy — Jessie’s Plan of . . . Superhero Project Planning. (Note: I need a better title for this.)
* Look through comics for inspiration and figure out who my role model will be.
* Find out what it would take to get from here (Jessie) to there (Super-Jessie).
* Rock my project and maybe try out some training myself . . .
The only problem with this plan is . . . can I really do the last bit? I mean, CAN I do it? I’m not the most “physically gifted” girl in school, I will be the first to admit. I’m not super-charged and I don’t pick up on how to do things very quickly. Also, I’m Miss Uncompetitive.
Is this a challenge I can handle?
FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 19
Checked in with some of my friends today. I wanted to know what they are coming up with for the Superhero Slam. We’re still trying to decide what superheroes we’ll be for the tournament. A few of them (Kayli and Amanda) are in band with me. I played the flute and then the cello, and then since I wasn’t really all that great I played . . . nothing. Kayli and I also did ballet together for a while. Well, she did ballet, I did my awkward version of little dance movements that hoped to be ballet when they got bigger and grew up. Amanda is a former gymnastics buddy. Again, she did gymnastics, I did some jumping and rolling but I wasn’t especially good at it. There’s a theme here.
And as I mentioned before, there’s my best friend, Audrey, who also swaps comics back and forth with me. She’s been my friend for, like, nine years. We met in pre-school when we were both four. Well, I guess when one of us (not me!) was four. The other (
me!) was five. My birthday is four months before Audrey’s, so I’m older. And wiser. About the ways of the world. Sometimes. At least between the two of us. I don’t show it much around others.
Sometimes Audrey forgets to return my comics . . . She loves them almost as much as I do — especially the team-up comics like JUSTICE LEAGUE, BIRDS OF PREY, and THE AVENGERS — so who’s counting, really?
OK. I am actually counting. I know she has four of my JUSTICE LEAGUE and two of my FLASH comics . . . I keep meaning to grab them from her room when I am over at her place. But her room is just such a mess. If I tried to grab those comics, I would have likely been buried alive under an avalanche of Audrey’s other gear!
Actually, it’s not all Audrey’s stuff. Most of the things all over her room are electronics and computers. She is so smart and good at doing things — and is so there for her friends — that she’s always fixing up stuff for people for free. She’s already repaired Cade’s remote-control submarine four times.
She even solved a computer problem for Mr. Richardson last year.
But all that helping other people means being busy all the time. And it means lots of stuff everywhere with very little time (or interest) for cleaning up. Somehow Audrey knows where everything is despite the mess and despite what parents see when they look at a room like that!
Seriously, I’d like Mom to swing by Audrey’s room the next time she gives my room the old inspection routine. I admit my room doesn’t always look awesome. But Audrey’s would be a real wake-up call for my mom!
But enough of that for now. Time for a snack . . . salad tastes better with dressing. My old pet guinea pig, Alfalfa, used to eat lettuce, carrots, and cucumbers too. But when we were feeding him, I am sure that the squeaky noises and twitching whiskers were crying out “Dressing! Dressing! Some tasty dressing please!”
Or maybe he just wanted out of his cage.
I doubt animals think much about nutrition and how food is like fuel for the body. Which is something I’ve been thinking about lately.
Anyway, pets are great friends even if they think different thoughts from me! Just like my human friends. I don’t think about technology and computers the same way that Audrey does. But we are still the best of buds. And anyway, being different means we learn from each other. Maybe I can try to be as good about analyzing things as she is.
I can start with this superhero project. I can tell I’ll have a lot to analyze — a whole year’s worth of information I haven’t even learned yet!
MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 22
I’m pretty steamed! I am not sure if teenaged boys are even human?! OK. OK. Mr. Richardson did teach us about the ways scientists organize life. The old domain, kingdom, phylum, class, order, family, genus, and species thing. So, according to science, Dylan is (likely) in the same species as me (human). But wow, according to my own experience, he must be a distant “caveman” relation.
I have had my fill of Dylan and his evil ways. After gym class, Audrey and Dylan were arguing about whether women or men are better athletes. I don’t remember how or why that crazy conversation even got started, but it got pretty intense. I think Audrey was still mad at him for what he said to me last week, and that didn’t help things.
They were acting like three-year-old kids, not grade 8s. And somehow the argument jumped into a fictional battle of men against women.
To summarize, here’s what they agreed on:
* Men and women are awesome. (Truth: they didn’t exactly agree, not technically. Audrey said women were awesome, Dylan said men were awesome. So they agreed that someone was awesome, they just didn’t agree that the other one was awesome too!)
* Professional athletes (men or women) would both beat either of them. (Truth: they did agree about this.)
Here’s what they disagreed about:
* Everything else.
Anyway, their little chat rapidly became one big men versus women, no holds barred shouting match. It was as bad as “my dad can beat your dad.” Actually more like, “My mom can beat your dad.” Ha!
Dylan just said, “Men are better. At everything. So there.”
“Wow, dude, nice argument. Logic much?” was Audrey’s fantastic retort.
Just then, Ms. King piped up. Apparently she had been around the corner and had finally had enough of the witty exchange between Dylan and Audrey.
“Ever heard of the tennis players Billie Jean King and Bobby Riggs?” she asked, in that way teachers do when they know for sure you don’t know what they are talking about. But they ask it anyway just to give you a chance. Or to make it seem like you have so much to learn . . . or maybe just so they can feel smarter!
Audrey: “Huh?”
Dylan: “Who?”
Me: “Errr . . .”
Blank faces all around. Dylan and Audrey just looked at each other — who are Billie Jean King and Bobby Riggs? Finally, common ground — neither had any clue on this one.
“Billie Jean King was a famous women’s tennis champion who played from 1959 to 1990,” Ms. King informed us. “And, I know what you are thinking, but even though we have the same last name we aren’t related. Too bad! I would so love to meet her.
“She won almost 700 matches and lost only about 150 times. She was the real deal.” That was Ms. King getting all hip and with it. And not doing too bad a job of it, really.
“While Billie Jean was winning all her matches, an older gentleman named Bobby Riggs came along and started saying bad things about female tennis players. Basically he said he could beat any woman tennis player anytime, anywhere.”
By this point Ms. King was on a bit of a roll — she seems to do this a lot. So naturally we got another question.
“Can you guess what Billie Jean did about that?”
“Well, I’d guess . . .” I surprised myself by getting involved and speaking up, but I wasn’t surprised that I got interrupted.
“She got destroyed by Bobby Riggs!” Dylan shouted over my hesitant beginning.
Apparently Billie Jean took Bobby up on his boast on a TV show called BATTLE OF THE SEXES. Kind of like reality TV but from back in the day. When TV was really real. (So says Mom.)
“In full view of TV cameras and millions of viewers, they played a best of five set match to see about men versus women. Guess what happened?” Ms. King, again with the leading question. Although this time I think she thought we might actually know the answer. Or at least I might.
So Audrey jumped in quickly. “I figure she beat Mr. Mouthy!”
“Bobby Riggs,” Ms. King said, smiling at Dylan, “lost each and every match.”
Dylan, who already didn’t look pleased, looked even worse when Audrey leaned in close and added two words: “EPIC,” and Audrey left a very dramatic pause before a clear “FAIL.”
Ms. King went down the hall, practically skipping after her fabulous teaching moment.
Unfortunately for clear thinkers everywhere, Dylan didn’t get the message and he and Audrey continued to argue.
Arguing with Dylan is just too tempting, it has to be said. The number of ridiculous things that boy can spew out in a single sentence is amazing. If only we could change his powers for evil into powers for good.
At one point I shouted something about how Batgirl could so take down Batman.
Anyway, Dylan didn’t even look at me and just carried on yelling at Audrey.
Dylan: “Batman taught Batgirl, you know.”
Audrey: “Yes, Dylan, I know that. So does anyone who ever read Batman or Batgirl comics.”
Dylan: “Well, Batgirl couldn’t even take out Batman Junior — Robin. Which is a lame bird anyway.”
Audrey: “Hey Dylan, easy on the witty comments. Why would I even care if Batgirl could beat Batman? Why would she go around trying to beat her teacher anyway? Doesn’t make sense. And Robin was taught by Batman too. So they
wouldn’t fight each other either.”
Dylan: “Well . . . comics aren’t for girls anyway.”
Me: “?”
Audrey (getting very angry): “?!?!?!”
Dylan (seizing the moment): “Yeah. Comics are for boys. And most of the writers and artists are all guys. So there.”
Me: “Err . . .”
I didn’t have much to say actually, and neither did Audrey. He kind of got us there. Not that comics are for guys — only a jerk would actually say or believe that. But he was right that a lot of comic book people have been guys.
The thing is, there really aren’t that many women or girl superheroes. Or are there?
I clearly needed to do some more research! It was time to visit my second favorite place in the world (besides my awesome bedroom) — Curious Comics.
TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 23
This I know for sure — my superhero is going to be female so I can beat Dylan. And rub it in. But which girl superhero? I figured a good place to do some research was at Curious Comics, my go-to shop for everything comics related, with my comic book queen, Ricki.
Ricki knows EVERYTHING, and she is always super helpful. She works part-time at Curious Comics. When she was younger she went to my same middle school. But now she’s 19 and taking Fine Arts (she is completely AWESOME) at the college. I never feel shy or awkward talking to Ricki.
Bat-tacular Comic Book Trivia — courtesy of Ricki: She asked me who the first female comic book superhero was. I knew she was probably expecting me to say Wonder Woman, and I did say that. But that’s not who it was. It was . . . wait for it — The Red Tornado! The Red Tornado appeared in November 1940 in ALL-AMERICAN COMICS #20.
Before I got a chance to see Red Tornado, just the name alone immediately brought these fantastic thoughts into my head:
