Elisabeth shook her head. “We’ve only been dating for a couple of months. It’s too soon. I really do like him, but I think he still has some issues to deal with.”
“Like?”
“Like his old girlfriend, Brianna. Remember how I told you that she died in that terrible plane crash over the ocean some months ago?” Elisabeth continued on when Mattie nodded, “The only reason he was attracted to me is because I look like her. I just hope he likes me for me, not because I resemble his former girlfriend.”
“I see.” Mattie frowned. “I’m sure he’s not that shallow.”
“No, but I don’t know if he’s completely over her yet.” She shook her head.
“I’m not certain you can ever be completely over a loved one dying.” Mattie sighed. “How about you? Are you completely over Luke? He’s still alive.”
“I think so. I mean, I did care for him. But I think he was more invested in our relationship than I was. I do wonder how he’s doing sometimes.” Elisabeth blew out a breath. “If I would have stayed, we’d probably be married by now.”
“Sounds like you might have some regrets.” Mattie lifted her eyebrows as if questioning her friend.
“No. No regrets. I’m happy here. I’m glad I met Carson—he’s a really great guy. He’s a Christian. And incredibly handsome.” Elisabeth smiled. “If he ever did want to marry me…” Her thoughts trailed off for a few seconds. “I think because of what happened with Brianna, he’ll probably want to take things slow.”
“Don’t you think he might be taking it slow for your benefit? Does he know you’re apprehensive because he told you that you reminded him of his lost love? I would think that he’s probably already decided to like you for who you are, not for who Brianna was,” Mattie offered.
“I hope so.”
“Well, perhaps you should ask him then. Be honest with him about your feelings,” Mattie suggested. “What have you got to lose?”
“You’re right,” Elisabeth agreed. “Maybe I’ll talk to him after church tomorrow.”
<><><>
“That was a convicting sermon, wasn’t it?” Carson lifted his brow, and then sank his teeth into his veggie burger.
She’d found his vegan lifestyle fascinating. Coming from the Amish, she’d never even heard of such a thing. She’d never had a smoothie before she’d met Carson, and green leaf salads were new to her as well. But she found that she enjoyed the new foods and experiences more than she’d expected to. Carson had informed her that a plant-based diet was much healthier and many health problems people suffered stemmed from excessive consumption of animal products and processed sugars. He’d also shown her a verse in Genesis that noted God’s original diet for man was a plant-based diet. Although, he’d made it clear that he didn’t believe eating meat was a sin. It was interesting, nonetheless.
“Yes, it was.” Elisabeth remembered their impending conversation and sighed, almost dreading where it might lead. But she needed to hear the truth.
“Is something the matter? It seems as if you’re a million miles away.” He set his burger down for a moment and gave her his undivided attention.
“When we first met, you said that I reminded you of Brianna.” She took a breath and continued on, “I…I was just wondering if that’s the only reason you’re dating me. Because, if it is…”
Carson’s brow furrowed in concern and he reached for Elisabeth’s hand. “I admit that is what drew me to you in the first place, Elisabeth. But you must know that I care for you. And while you and Brianna may look alike, it is obvious you are two very different people.”
“That’s good to hear. You’ve seemed reticent for some reason.”
“Well, you kind of took me by surprise. I didn’t have in mind to jump into another relationship right away. I have regrets about my relationship with Brianna. The last time I saw her I’d become frustrated with her. I tried to share the Gospel with her, but she just wouldn’t listen. I think she just probably assumed that she’d live forever. And now…it’s too late for her.” Carson sighed, obviously grieved. “I’ve harbored anger towards her. If only she hadn’t been so stubborn. I sincerely hope I’m wrong, but I fear she’s in Hell now.”
Elisabeth looked down at their intertwined fingers. “I’m sorry. I had no idea.”
Carson brightened a bit, giving a half-smile. “I don’t regret my relationship with you, though. As a matter of fact, I was hoping we could spend more time together? I want to know everything about you. You intrigue me.”
Elisabeth laughed. “I’ve never thought of myself as intriguing, but I think I’d enjoy spending more time with you. Especially since I’ll probably have more free time now that Mattie and Richard are getting married. I’m sure they’ll want to spend extra time together.”
Carson smiled. “They are? That’s great! Wow, I feel like I haven’t spoken with Carson in forever. Be sure to tell Mattie congratulations for me. When’s the big day?”
“In a few months.” She frowned.
“For some reason, you don’t seem too thrilled.”
“Oh no, I’m happy for Mattie. It’s just that she and I are roommates.”
“Ah, I see. You’re worried about finding another roommate.” He caught on. “We could ask around at church. Perhaps there’s a college student or someone else that’s looking to rent.”
“That’s a great idea! I don’t know why I never thought of that before.” Elisabeth smiled now.
“I guess we make a good team.” Carson smiled, looking down at their now cold food. “We should probably eat now.”
Elisabeth agreed, and took a bite of her salad with a renewed sense of confidence.
<><><>
Chapter 4
Luke donned his hat and approached Elisabeth’s brother, Jacob Schrock, after church on Sunday. “Hey Jacob, have you heard anything about Elisabeth?” he asked as they lifted the wooden bench to haul it outside for the meal.
“Nee.” Jacob glowered. “I’m sorry, Luke. It just doesn’t seem as if Elisabeth will be coming back to our people. She’s chosen a different way.”
“How can you be sure she won’t return?” Luke challenged, refusing to give up.
“No letters, no phone calls. It’s pretty clear she doesn’t want to be involved with any of us anymore.” Jacob shook his head in shame. “If I were you, Luke, I’d move on.”
Luke blew out a frustrated breath, yearning to yell or cry or punch a wall or…something. “I’ve tried to, Jacob. My mind won’t let me forget her. I’ve tried courting other maed. For some reason, my heart just can’t let go.”
“I don’t mean to discourage you, Luke. But how long are you willing to wait for her? She may never come home. For all we know, she could already be married to an Englischer. I’d hate to see a gut Amish man like you end up without a fraa and kinner. You can learn to love someone else, ain’t so?”
Luke shrugged. “I don’t know.”
Hurt gripped Luke’s heart at just the thought of his precious Elisabeth married to someone else. And an Englischer, at that.
“You’re a gut friend, Jacob. Denki for your advice.” Luke patted Jacob’s back, and then walked toward his buggy with his shoulders slumped and head down. He was no longer in the mood for fellowship.
He just wanted to be alone.
<><><>
Brianna peered through the large window into the sea of wheeled plexiglass bassinets. Each infant, so small and precious, belonged to someone. Someone that cared for them. Someone that loved them. Someone they would go home with.
Brianna sniffled and turned away, unable to bear the thought that she had no one. Pain strained her heart. She couldn’t stop the free-flow of tears, even though others now stood on either side of her. She attempted to brush them away and abruptly turned to go back to her room.
A hand on her shoulder halted her in her tracks. “Hullo. I couldn’t help but notice you’re crying. I’m sorry you’re not happy. Would you like to talk about it?”
&nbs
p; Brianna refused to lift her eyes at the young woman’s kind words. How could she explain that she was unloved? She quietly shook her head.
“Sometimes it helps to talk about these things,” the young woman urged. “I’m willing to listen, if you’d like to go somewhere and talk.”
Perhaps sharing her burden with someone would help her find some answers. I couldn’t hurt, could it? She desperately needed a friend right now.
“Thank you.” Brianna lifted her head, looked into her eyes.
The woman let out a loud gasp.
“Elisabeth?” The young woman’s face shown astonishment.
Brianna’s hands began to tremble. Tears suddenly pricked her eyes once again. “You…you know me?” Could it be? Her excitement was almost too much to contain.
“Ach, of course I know you! Surely you haven’t forgotten me, Lis. We’ve known each other our entire lives,” the young woman asserted. “When you left for Rumspringa, we didn’t know if you’d ever come back. Why are you here in the hospital?”
She had no clue where ‘Rumspringa’ was or why she’d gone there, but it didn’t matter. This person knew her! “Do you mean to tell me I have a family?” Brianna still couldn’t believe it. Dare she hope?
The young woman laughed. “Of course you have family, a pretty large one in fact. Are you alright?” She held her hand up to Brianna’s forehead checking for a temperature.
“No.” Brianna’s eyes shined. “I…I had an accident. I can’t remember anything from my life before. I don’t know anyone.”
“So, you really don’t know who I am?” Concern creased the young woman’s forehead.
Brianna shook her head and frowned. “I’m afraid I don’t even know who I am.”
“You are Elisabeth Schrock from Paradise, Pennsylvania. I’m Rachel Brenneman, your neighbor. I’m here in New York to help my aunt Emma with her kinner and the new boppli. She just had a babe, would ya like to see him?” Rachel asked.
Brianna nodded and allowed Rachel to lead her back to the nursery window.
“See the one closest to the window in the blue crocheted cap? That’s little Abe. He was named after his father, who goes by Abraham. He is a nice boppli, jah? ” Rachel’s eyes glistened with pride.
“Yes, he’s very cute.” Brianna smiled. “Rachel, will you please help me get back home?”
“Ach, jah. Of course! Your mamm and dat will be ever so happy to see ya.”
“They will?” Brianna asked excitedly.
“Jah, and poor Luke too.” Rachel shook her head.
“Luke?” Brianna wondered who he was, a brother maybe.
“Luke’s been pining for you somethin’ awful since you left. Everyone in our district has felt so sorry for him. Rumor was he was gonna ask you to marry him after you both got baptized into the church,” Rachel said matter-of-factly. “But you left.”
Brianna’s eyes widened in disbelief. I have a boyfriend too? Suddenly she noticed Rachel’s attire. “Why do you dress that way?”
Rachel shook her head. “You really have forgotten everything. You have forgotten your Amish roots?”
Amish? Do I know what that is? “I’m afraid so.” Brianna shrugged. “I guess I’ll have to learn everything again.”
“That’s all right. The important thing is that you’re here and you want to go home!” Rachel smiled. “I’m so excited! I can’t wait to see the look on your mamm’s face when she sees you again. I will talk to Aunt Emma to see if we can hire a driver to take us home.”
“I have to check with the nurses. They said I was nearly done with my treatment. I…” Brianna broke down in tears again. She stood there in the hallway sobbing and allowed Rachel to pull her into a hug. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to cry this much. It’s just that I had no idea where I would go. I couldn’t remember anything. I was all alone. I thought nobody loved me.”
“Shh…everything will be just fine now, Elisabeth. And you have an entire community full of people that love you,” Rachel asserted again.
<><><>
“What’s that ya got there?” Rachel moved closer on the vehicle’s seat and leaned over toward Brianna.
Brianna protectively covered the words she had written. “It’s just my journal. The doctor suggested I keep a daily journal, so I’m writing about everything that has happened in my life since the accident.” Brianna closed her journal, deciding to take a break from writing for a while. She glanced out the window and noticed the changing scenery. Gone were the looming skyscrapers of the city. They were replaced with beautiful countryside and trees galore. Pennsylvania was indeed beautiful.
“It’s schee, jah?” Rachel noted.
“Schee?” Brianna cocked her head.
“I see you’ve forgotten your Dietsch. Ach, the city must’ve stolen your Amish from you. Schee means pretty,” Rachel explained.
“Yes, it is schnee,” Brianna agreed.
Rachel responded by laughing out loud.
“What? Did I say something wrong?” Brianna’s confused expression caused Rachel to laugh all the more.
“I’m sorry, Elisabeth. It’s just that you said schnee. Schnee means snow. We won’t have snow for several months yet.”
Brianna giggled then too. She’d done that much more since she’d met Rachel. “I’m going to be in trouble when we get there and everyone tries to speak to me in Pennsylvania Dutch, aren’t I?”
“That’s okay. I’ll warn them. And I’ll be sure to teach you a few more words before we get there. How does that sound?” Rachel offered.
“That sounds wonderful.”
“Wunderbaar,” Rachel corrected.
“Wunderbaar is wonderful. I think it would be wunderbaar if we could make some flash cards to help me remember.” Brianna smiled.
“I’ll do that,” Rachel said. “Why don’t you go ahead and write in your journal. I’m sure you have a lot to say.”
“I think I will,” Brianna agreed. She flipped through the pages of her journal and read through the last few entries.
July 25 – Today was the best day of my entire life! Well, of the life I can remember anyway. I met someone today that knows who I am. Her name is Rachel Brenneman and she is my neighbor. Isn’t it a coincidence that we would meet in a hospital all the way in New York, when we both lived in Pennsylvania? I told Rachel that, and she said that it could only be God’s divine providence. I don’t know much about God, but I think she’s right. I guess I used to go to church all the time and pray and read the Bible. I must have been close to God, I think. There’s so much I wish I could remember.
By the way, in case I ever forget again, my name is Elisabeth Schrock and I live in Paradise, Pennsylvania. My parents are Benjamin and Leah Schrock and I have seven siblings. Seven!
July 26 – The nurses told me I can go home tomorrow. Home! Just yesterday I had no home that I knew of. I can’t express the joy that fills my heart right now. I wonder what my mom and dad are like. Or my brothers and sisters. Or Luke. I can’t believe that I have a boyfriend at home waiting for me! I hope he’s cute. Rachel said that he’s very attractive. She described him to me and he does sound handsome. I’m a little apprehensive about meeting him though. Although he has known me my whole life, he will be a total stranger to me. What will he expect from me? I guess I will find out soon because Rachel found a driver for us and at this time tomorrow I will be home. I’m excited and scared to death all at the same time. Rachel says I should pray to help calm my nerves, so I think I will do that now.
July 27 – Today Rachel and I are traveling home. I am dressed Amish now. Rachel was kind enough to loan me some of her clothes. She said that once I get home I can wear the ones I left in my room when I left two years ago. I hope they are still there because Rachel said that if they aren’t then I could just sew up some new ones. But there is one problem. I don’t think I can remember how to sew. So many things I’ll have to learn again. Oh well. I’m just happy to be on my way home now.
Right now we are rid
ing in what Rachel calls an ‘English’ car. I don’t know how that is different from an Amish car. I didn’t ask her. I don’t want to inundate her with questions lest she tire of me. We will be in Pennsylvania shortly and I can’t wait to see what my home state looks like. What will my house look like? My parents? I guess I will find out in just a few hours…
<><><>
Chapter 5
Driving through the traffic in New York City still grated on Elisabeth’s nerves even after having her license for over a year and a half. She should have learned to drive when she was sixteen back in Pennsylvania when Luke urged her to. He said she should know how to drive just in case there was ever an emergency, but she was much too scared at the time. Driving had come naturally for Luke, it seemed. When he began his Rumspringa at sixteen, she was just fourteen. But Luke, even with his eagerness to drive, never really chafed against the rules the way she had. He was Amish through and through.
More and more, she realized that she didn’t miss the Amish life as much as she thought she would. She had become used to all the modern Englisch conveniences and she enjoyed them. Sometimes she felt guilty about sitting down to watch television when the dishes had yet to be washed. Her mamm never would have approved. I wonder what Mamm would think if she came to visit. She would be shocked to say the least.
Yet somehow Elisabeth felt like she wasn’t displeasing God. At least not in the way she was living. She still went to church on Sunday and read her Bible and prayed. Her clothing was different, but not necessarily immodest. She didn’t wear tight jeans or revealing tops like a lot of Englischers did.
The only thing she missed was her family and close community. To her surprise, she didn’t even miss Luke all that much. Of course, with Carson around, why would she? Carson was every bit as sweet as Luke was and every bit as good-looking too. Yet he was Englisch. A more suitable mate than Luke would have been for that reason alone.
Today, Carson was taking her to see the Statue of Liberty. He couldn’t believe she’d been in New York for two years and had never visited the monument. Since Carson’s place was closer, she agreed to meet him at his house and then he would drive from there. Shivers of excitement ran up her spine as she thought about spending the whole day with him.
Amish by Accident Page 3
