"She's still the same." I shrug. "I went to see her the other day."
"I'd still like to go with you one day so I can meet her."
"Garrett, it's not…"
"You're going to tell me that it's not necessary." He swipes the linen napkin across his mouth as he interrupts me. "Your mother may not be fully aware of who comes to meet her, but I'll be fully aware of meeting her. I'd love to meet her."
I've never dated a man who offered something that genuinely kind before. "Maybe at some point we can do that."
"You're playing hard to get again, Vanessa."
"No," I pull my hand through my hair. "I'm not doing that."
"Next you're going to tell me that you can't come home with me."
I was going to say that. "I can't. I have an early day tomorrow."
"That excuse is as lame tonight as it was the last time you used it." He tosses the napkin onto the table. "Do you have a secret boyfriend you haven't told me about?"
I sigh overly dramatically, enjoying how playful he is. "Is that what you think is going on? You think I have a secret boyfriend that I'm keeping hidden from you?"
He leans forward slowly, his eyes never leaving my face. "It might be a boyfriend. Maybe it's an entire family. You're hiding something from me and it's big."
Chapter 18
I'm back in the exact same spot I was weeks ago. I'm in a chair in the living room of Garrett's apartment. I couldn’t catch my breath after he blurted out that he knew I was holding onto a secret. I let him guide me into a taxi and I clung to him as he kissed my neck and told me how much he wanted me.
I'd twisted my hands in his hair as he ate me to one exquisite orgasm after another. Then I kissed him deeply when he pulled me onto his body so I could ride his big, beautiful cock. He'd screamed my name when he came and held me close to him as he drifted off to sleep. I'd rested there, with my eyes wide open until I felt his breathing level. Then I carefully pulled myself free of his strong embrace, pushed my arms through the white dress shirt he'd been wearing all day and came out here, to sit and think.
I reach into my purse and pull Rowena's notebook into my lap. I open the pages, scanning the messily written words. I wonder if her confessions will mean more to me now that I know the true depth of her desperation. I read through one page before I see the shadow of his large frame cast darkness over my lap.
"That's your mother's journal, isn't it?" He reaches out with his hand. "Stand up, Vanessa."
I do without any thought. He looks different in the pale light of the room with sleep still in his eyes. His hair is a tousled mess from where I gripped tightly to the strands as I ground myself into his face chasing my own release. His body is nude, his toned frame on full display. I doubt I'll ever know anyone like him again. I don't want to know another man the way I know him.
"Sit on my lap." He lowers himself into the chair and pats his legs. "Let me hold you."
I sit down carefully, mindful of where his cock is.
"You can't hurt it." He nuzzles his face into my neck. "It's going to be hard again in about ten seconds."
I laugh loudly, throwing my head back with abandon. "You're…"
"I'm what." He doesn't let me finish. "Handsome? Sexy? You think I'm the best looking man you've ever met, don't you?"
I wrap my arm over his shoulder, my hand resting on his neck. "You are the most incredible man I've ever met."
"I've never met anyone like you." His voice is deep and raspy. "I never imagined I could meet a woman like you."
"A nurse?" I tease as I kiss his cheek softly.
"No." He grabs my chin, tilting my face towards his. "A beautiful, sexy, smart woman who sees things in me that no one else can."
I swallow hard. "I'm not that special."
"You're a fucking angel." He brushes his lips over mine. "You're the best person I know."
"No." I lick my upper lip. "I'm not a good person. You're wrong."
He studies my face carefully. "Why would you say that? Something is eating you up, Vanessa. Tell me what it is."
I pull on the edge of my hair. This can never move forward if I'm not honest with him. "My mother did something… it was unforgiveable."
"That's on your mother." His tone is controlled. "You're not responsible for anything she's done."
"That's true," I agree. "I have to live with the consequences of it though."
"It hurt you, didn't it?" he asks quietly. "The thing she did, it's still hurting you."
"It will always hurt." I lift my chin. "It's complicated my life."
"Complicated in what way?" He wraps his arm around my legs, adjusting my body slightly on his lap.
"Legally, emotionally." I push against the back of the chair to level myself. "My life is always going to be fucked up because of what she did."
"Legally?" he ignores everything after that word. "In what way? Did your mother do something illegal?"
"A long time ago she did." I know timing doesn't matter, but it lessens the severity of her actions in my mind, if I'm able to put tangible distance between that day in the park and now.
"If the statute of limitations has passed, it's not relevant in the eyes of the law, Vanessa. When did this happen?"
"Almost twenty-five years ago."
He doesn't mask the surprise in his expression at all. His mouth even falls open briefly. "That's so long ago. It was before you were born?"
"No, it happened shortly after I was born."
"Unless it was a federal crime, it's likely not on the books anymore. I doubt that anyone would even remember what it was."
"It was a federal crime." I know that because I'd asked Imogen about it. She explained that in the case of child abductions, charges could be brought decades later. It's happened in many cases in the past.
"Have you talked to a lawyer about this?" he pauses briefly. "I'm talking about a criminal defense attorney. Has your mother ever consulted with one?"
"I don't think so," I say genuinely. "I don't think anyone but me knows what she did."
"Do you want to tell me what it is?" He taps my knee with his hand. "I can draw up a contract that says I'm representing you and that will invoke client, attorney privilege."
"We have to take that step?"
"We're lovers." His hand sweeps across my thigh." We're dating. It's prudent. It would be best to have something in place before you confess your mother's crimes to me."
The playful lilt in his voice irritates me. He can't possibly know the gravity of what I'm dealing with, but I still feel annoyed that he's finding humor in something that is tearing me apart.
"Actually." He reaches to clasp my hand in his. "Maybe you should talk to a criminal defense attorney I know. It might be the best thing to do for your mother and for you."
Chapter 19
I can't scramble to my feet fast enough. "I have to get her a lawyer? I can't just tell you?"
"No. Well, yes." He's on his feet now too. He rakes his hand through his hair. "I’m not your lawyer right now. You can't tell me."
"You're a lawyer. Let's sign a contract." I push my index finger into his chest. "If I tell you anything then, you can't tell the police."
He scratches the bridge of his nose. "It may not be that simple. I don't have a thorough grasp on criminal law, Vanessa. I want you to have the best advice you can."
"I told Zoe's friend, Imogen, about it." I don't think before I start throwing out names. "She's been helping me."
"Imogen?" He takes a heavy step towards me. "Are you talking about Imogen Ford?"
I nod briskly. "Zoe arranged it. I needed some legal advice."
"About this?" He waves his large arms in the air. "You went to Imogen Ford to talk about a federal crime? The woman works for a tech company. She's an expert in corporate law. Not this."
"She is helping me understand things."
"What things?"
"I didn't have anywhere else to go." I grab the front of the shirt I'm wearing. "I needed some
one to help me."
"Why didn't you ask me, Vanessa?" he scowls. "I have friends who are skilled in this area of the law. I could have arranged a meeting for you with any of them."
It's a half-hearted, late, attempt to offer me some assistance. Judging by what happened just now, when I was set to confess my mother's crime to him, he would have treated me with even less compassion if I would have asked for his help weeks ago.
"It doesn't matter, Garrett." I circle my fingers around one of the buttons on the front of the shirt. "I'm handling it myself."
"You can't tell anyone about this." His gaze narrows on me. "The law is very complicated when it comes to serious crimes. If you have knowledge of a federal crime and you don't report it, you are an accessory after the fact."
"I haven't done anything wrong." I wring my hands together. "My mother did something to me. She is the one who broke the law."
"How long have you known about it?" He crosses his arms over his chest. "Have you told anyone besides Imogen?"
"It hasn't been that long." I pull on the hem of the shirt. "Zoe knows. She probably told her husband."
"Vanessa." He throws his head back in a huff. "You have to stop telling people. You can't go around just telling anyone about a federal crime. You're going to get yourself into serious trouble."
"I trust the people I told." I bark back. "I trust all of them."
"That's just being foolish." He points his finger at me. "People can turn on you in the blink of an eye. You can't trust anyone in a situation like this."
"I'm leaving," I announce before I turn on my heel. "I can't do this right now."
"You can't ignore this." He's right behind me as I walk down the hallway. "Whatever this is, you have to deal with it."
"I am." I turn to face him. "I am trying to do that."
"Please." His hands fly to my shoulders. "I care so much about you. Christ, just so much, Vanessa."
I don't react. I want to find faith in those words but the man was quick to shut me down the moment I started to open my mouth about what my mother did. "I can't do this, Garrett. I can't stay here."
"I am going to have one of my friends call you." He reaches past me to where his smartphone is sitting on a nightstand. "He's the best there is. I'll cover his fees. Please, Vanessa. Please talk to him."
Chapter 20
"Vanessa?"
I dart my hand into the air between us. "You must be Mr. Tiller."
He gives my hand a firm shake. "It's Jonah."
"Jonah," I repeat quietly.
"Garrett didn’t have a lot to share." He opens a tablet on his desk. "He paid my retainer so we're good to go."
We're not good to go. It's been more than a week since I walked out of Garrett's apartment unsure of what I should do. I went to visit my mother twice and cried with my head in her lap, looking for answers that she couldn't offer to me. I'd spoken to Imogen once, who assured me that it wouldn't hurt to talk to someone skilled in the area of criminal law and I had held Zoe's hands as she confessed that she wanted me to protect myself and if this was the way to do it, I should.
"I don't know much about the law."
"That's why you're here and I'm ready to help." He smiles genuinely. He's older. His face is kind. "Garrett told me that you have knowledge of a crime that your mother committed."
"You can't tell him about this conversation, can you?" I lean forward to rest my hand against the edge of his desk. "I know he's paying your fees, but you can't share what I'm about to tell you with him, can you?"
"I can't," he assures me. "Although I was under the impression, from what Garrett told me, that you were just about to share details of the crime with him before he stopped you."
I was. I wanted to. My heart was aching to but when he jumped into full legal mode, any desire I had to share my deepest, darkest secrets with him vanished. We've barely spoken since that day. We shared a strained visit in the hospital cafeteria along with a few brief phone calls.
"I'd like to pay the retainer myself." I reach to pick up my purse from where I rested it on the floor next to the chair I'm sitting in. "I don't want to be in debt to Garrett."
"I can have my assistant take care of that after our meeting." He punches a few keys on the tablet. "I'd like to record our meeting if you're comfortable with that."
I'm not but I've come this far. "It's not something that can be used against me, can it?"
He smiles broadly. "It's for my reference."
"I'm fine with it." I survey the room, taking in all the certificates hanging on the walls.
"Let's start at the beginning, Vanessa." He leans back in his chair. "Tell me about your mother. Is she aware that we're meeting today? Did you ask her to attend with you?"
"My mother has advanced Alzheimer's disease. She lives in an extended care center in Brooklyn."
"I'm sorry." His expression gives nothing away. "I wasn't aware of that."
He's not aware of anything. I'm sitting in a room with a stranger about to confess my mother's worst sins all because I wanted to feel closer to Garrett. It's irony at its best.
"Let's cut to the chase." I take a deep breath. "My mother kidnapped me when I was an infant. I only discovered it recently."
He sits straight up in his chair. His eyes dart from me to the tablet on the desk. "Your mother kidnapped you?"
"Yes. That's what I said."
"When was this?"
I blow out a puff of air, knowing that I've gotten past the worst part. "It was almost twenty-five years ago."
"Where did this happen?" He rests his elbows on his desk.
"Here. It happened in New York." I gesture toward the bank of windows overlooking the city's skyline behind him. "It was in a park. She took me from a stroller."
He leans closer, his eyes studying my face. "You're not the Tomlin girl, are you? You can't be her."
"That's exactly who I am." I smile briefly. "I'm Charlotte Tomlin."
"Charlotte," he says the name slowly and with extra effort. "I know you, Charlotte. I was one of your father's best friends."
Chapter 21
"This is my father?" I stare down at the framed picture of Jonah and another man. "He was so handsome."
"Oh, he was a looker, little one." He stops himself. "We called you that. Your dad did, before you disappeared."
"Little one," I repeat it back.
"You were named after him, you know." He points to my father's handsome, rugged face in the faded photograph. "Charlie Tomlin. Charles. That's what your mom called him."
"I knew his name was Charles. I read that online."
"He loved you bunches." He touches my shoulder briefly. "He would have been so proud of you. Look at you. You're all grown up."
"I wish I could have known him before he died." I push the picture back into his hands.
"That's your picture now if you want it." He rests it on my lap. "I have a lot more at home. I can make you copies if you want them."
"I would love that." I don't try to hide the excitement in my voice. This is the first person I've spoken with who knew my parents. "It would mean a lot to me to have them."
"You'll give me your address, and I'll send them over this week."
I know I should pull the conversation back to that day in the park, but I can't. I'm still amazed by the fact that Garrett steered me right into the office of one of my birth father's closest friends. "Tell me what he was like."
"Charlie?" He settles back into his chair. "He was funny as hell. The man could make everyone in the room laugh."
I smile as I imagine the man in the picture laughing. I can't recall his voice. I was too young to remember anything about my birth family.
"Your mom passed a few weeks ago," he says grimly. "She was strong as an ox. She got sick and couldn't beat it."
"I know," I mutter. "I went to her townhouse to see her, but…"
"You were at the house?" His lips thin. "Did you talk to Connie?"
"Briefly." I nod. "I haven
't seen her since."
An alarm on his smartphone jars us both from the conversation.
"Dammit." He looks down at the screen. "I have another meeting in ten minutes. We have to wrap this up."
"I'm not sure what I should be doing next."
"We need to talk to the police." He flips through the calendar on his phone. "I have a detective friend downtown. I'll talk to him and then we can go in together next week."
"I'm not sure…I don't know…" I stammer. "What will happen to my mother? The woman who raised me is a good person. I don't want her to get in trouble."
"I understand." His lips twitch slightly. "You can't sit on this. It's an open case. We have to go to the police."
"She's too frail to face any of this. She won't understand what's going on." I hold in a sob. "I'm all that she has."
"All of that will be taken into consideration," he assures me. "If we don't go to the police now, and this comes to the surface in the future, it will be much more serious."
I twist my hands together, suddenly aware of the gravity of everything that's happening. I wish I had brought Zoe with me for moral support. "I need to talk to my friend about this."
"Garrett?" he asks while he studies his phone. "He's handling Franny's estate, isn't he?"
Franny? My mother had a nickname. A fun, playful name that the people who cared for her called her.
"He is, yes."
"You haven't told him, have you?" He rubs his hand over the back of his neck. "He doesn't know who you are, does he?"
"No," I confess. "I haven't told Garrett."
"Tell him." He stands up from his chair. "You have to do that. He needs to know you're Charlotte."
"Why?" It's a question I put absolutely no thought into.
"You are Charlotte Tomlin." He moves around the desk until he's stranding right in front of me. "You may have been taken away from that family, but you are still part of it. Your sister isn't fit to carry on the family name. You are. Make your mother proud."
Trace - Part Two Page 6
