by Susan Stoker
But more than curiosity was the alarming notion that there might be someone out there who was actually dangerous. Who might hurt other people. People like Dane. Dane didn’t live in town, he could be vulnerable at his house by himself. What if this John Smith guy was truly dangerous? Shouldn’t he be stopped before he hurt someone?
Bryn struggled with what she should do. She really wanted to see another bunker. Wanted to compare them. Note the similarities and differences between the two. But she couldn’t just walk up and say, “Hi, I’m Bryn and I want to see your bunker.” She knew that wouldn’t fly. But what if she discovered more information about the man without physically going to see him? She might be able to find out if she should report this John Smith guy to the authorities.
But if she wasn’t able to find out any other information and she did go and see him, she’d just reassure him that she didn’t care about where he lived and she wasn’t going to come back if the world ended to steal his stuff. She just wanted to pick his brain.
Deciding right then and there to see what she could find out about John Smith the next time she worked, Bryn turned her eyes back to the computer screen and the books the library had on preppers and survivalist training. Luckily there were a few, not the one the guy on the forum suggested, but Bryn decided she’d start with what was available and go from there.
She wasn’t surprised at the level of interest she had, which bordered on obsession, because that was how it usually worked with her. A topic would resonate with her and, once it did, she had to completely exhaust all avenues to get information about it. In the past, she’d researched everything from roller coasters and how they were built and maintained—which ended with a trip to Cedar Point in Sandusky, Ohio, to observe them and get a VIP tour—to the use of pesticides on farms in the Midwest.
There was no rhyme or reason as to what she got obsessed with, but Bryn had learned over the years that the only way she could get back to “normal,” whatever that was, was to learn as much as possible about the topic. Once she’d satisfied her curiosity and felt like she had a good understanding of the issue or topic, she could drop it.
The trip to Mr. Jasper’s bunker had only piqued her interest. It’d started with the bunker book she’d found in the library and now she was fully in the midst of an obsessive need to know more. She didn’t tell Dane about her chats with the preppers she’d met on the forum, but the more she talked to them, the more she wanted to know.
But as much as she wanted to know more about bunkers and the prepper lifestyle, she had another obsession…Dane. She liked the man. Really liked him. Was fascinated by his prosthetic and the man himself. Not to mention how much she enjoyed kissing him. It was unlike her to have more than one obsession at a time, but she was well and truly hooked by both Dane and the survivalist lifestyle.
As if her thoughts of Dane were a magnet, she felt compelled to hear his voice. To apologize for not calling him last night. To connect with him.
Pulling out her phone as she walked to the stacks of books where she’d find the books on the prepper lifestyle, Bryn clicked on Dane’s number.
“Hey, Smalls.”
“I’m really, really sorry I didn’t call. I wanted to. It’s not that I didn’t want you to come back over or that I didn’t want to make out with you. It’s just that once I logged on, I started to research survivalist shelters and they’re all so different. Did you know some people have to drive like two hours to get to theirs? They’re up in the mountains, hidden so well no one would ever be able to find them. Even they have to use a GPS to find them. And they range from the really expensive ones that are put in by professional companies—did you know there are organizations that specialize in making shelters like that?—to Conex containers people have buried in the ground. It’s completely amazing. But I got distracted and meant to only message a few people, but I lost track of time. I’m sorry.”
When Dane didn’t say anything, Bryn tentatively asked, “Dane?”
“Where are you?”
“The library. Why?”
“I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
“Uh…okay?”
He chuckled but didn’t elaborate. “See you soon, Smalls.”
Bryn clicked off the phone, her brows drawn down in confusion. She’d never really understood men, but she really didn’t get Dane sometimes. Shrugging, she tucked her phone into her pocket and perused the shelves. If she only had ten minutes, she needed to find the books she wanted and check out before Dane arrived. The last thing she wanted was to forget about him again. It seemed like he wasn’t all that mad…this time, but she didn’t want to push her luck.
Exactly ten minutes later, Bryn was thanking Bonnie, who had just handed her the two books she’d checked out, when she felt a hand at the small of her back.
Turning, Bryn saw Dane standing behind her, smiling down at her.
“Hey.”
“Hey back,” he returned. “Ready to go?”
“I guess. Not that I know where we’re going.”
“My place.”
“Oh, okay. Is everything all right?” Bryn asked. He was acting weird, and she wasn’t sure exactly what to think.
“Yup.” He led them out to the parking lot and to his truck.
“I can drive out to your place.”
“Nope.”
Climbing inside, Bryn waited until Dane was belted in and had started driving through Rathdrum to speak. “I really am sorry, Dane. I didn’t mean to lose track of time. But you should know, it happens more often than not. I can’t help it.”
“I know.”
Bryn huffed out in exasperation. “Then what’s going on? You aren’t saying more than two words at a time. Do you need coffee? Is your blood sugar low? I’m kinda freaking out here.”
“I’m not upset at all, sweetheart. I knew when I dropped you off that I probably wouldn’t hear from you. I know how you are. And it doesn’t bother me. But I didn’t sleep that well last night.”
“Why?”
“I was worrying about what was going on in that pretty head of yours. Were you arranging to fly to Wyoming to meet with a man you met online who offered to show you his bunker? I wondered if you were going to get any sleep or not. I worried about if you were going to try to hack into the FBI’s database to find out more information about what I might have arranged to send to Mr. Jasper for agreeing to meet with us.”
“I don’t know how to hack. Although I’m sure I could probably figure it out, it can’t be that hard, I’m just not interested in computers that way. Science and math are more my thing.”
Dane grinned, but kept his eyes on the road. “I also didn’t sleep well because I couldn’t stop thinking about seeing you without your shirt on again, this time not while I was drunk, and how much I couldn’t wait to get my hands, and mouth, on you.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh.” He finally turned to look at her then, and Bryn almost felt burned alive at the heat and desire she saw in his eyes. “I want you, Smalls. Every way I can get you. I swear to God I’ve never felt this pull I have to you with any other woman.”
“You haven’t had sex in a long time,” Bryn blurted.
“Nope,” he agreed immediately. “But just because I haven’t been with anyone since before I was hurt, doesn’t mean that I haven’t been around attractive women. Women who would’ve taken me home and let me fuck them if I’d only given them a sign I wanted that. But I had no desire to even think about it. None. Zero. I was too busy having a pity party for myself. Thinking about how broken and fucked up I was.
“I think part of the reason I was so mean to you in the grocery store that night was because I was attracted to you at first glance. It threw me for a loop and I reacted badly. I’m happy as I can be that you seem to have forgiven me, but I haven’t forgiven myself yet. I’m working on making it right.”
“So we’re going to your house so you can take off my shirt and make out?”
He laughed and sh
ook his head in amusement. “You really say it like it is, don’t you, Smalls?”
She shrugged. “Yeah. It’s too confusing when people say things they don’t mean. I don’t always get sarcasm either…although I think I’m getting better at it.”
“Then yes. I’m taking you to my place so we can make out and I can see those beautiful breasts of yours without your bra covering them up. I want to see what you look like when you come, and I’d kill to feel how hot and wet you are inside. Was that clear enough?”
“Uh…yeah. Dane?”
“Yes, sweetheart?”
“Will I get to see you too? Make you come?”
“You can do whatever you want with me.”
“Okay then.”
“But I’m not just gonna jump you the second we go inside. I want to know what you learned last night. I want to see the books you just checked out, and I want to feed you. I like taking care of you, listening to you. Then you can ask me what I did after I got home and we’ll have a pleasant conversation. I’ll touch you while we’re doing it. Maybe hold your hand. I’ll probably kiss you a time or two. Then when we’re both comfortable, and we’ve drawn it out as much as possible, I’ll take you to my bedroom and lay you on my sheets and we’ll go from there.”
“So we’ll have sex?”
Dane shook his head as he turned down his driveway. “I don’t think so. I mean, I’m sure we could change our minds if we get so excited and turned on we can’t resist…but that’s not my plan.”
He parked the truck and turned it off. Dane hopped out and strode around to the other side and opened her door. Before she could get out, he stepped closer and blocked her exit. Putting one hand on her hip and his stump on her other thigh, he leaned in and looked into her eyes.
“I want you, Bryn. I want to bury myself so far inside you that I can’t tell where you end and I begin. But if I’m being honest, I’ve enjoyed getting to know you over the last few weeks. You’re funny, smart, and I learn something from you every day. I’m not hanging out with you simply to get laid, and I hope it’s the same with you.”
Bryn huffed out a laugh. “No, Dane. No guy has wanted to hang out with me before the way you have. If he wanted to have sex, it usually came up in our second date.”
“So I want to make out with you. I want to make you come, but I also want to prove to you that you mean more to me than a quick lay. Okay?”
“You don’t have to prove it to me.”
“Then I want to prove it to myself. Now, come on. I’ll see what I’ve got inside that I can make for a late breakfast. I know you probably ate already, but you’ll want to eat something to keep up your strength. I don’t want you passing out on me later.” He grinned, then continued, “I ordered seasons five through eight of Mythbusters and they were delivered yesterday. We can start where we left off and work our way through them.”
“Today?”
Dane helped her out of the truck and closed the door behind her. “Yeah, Smalls. Today. But not too many. I’ve got other plans for us too…remember?”
She glanced up at him as they walked to the front door of his house. “Yeah, I remember.”
Bryn let go of Dane long enough to let him unlock his door, and took a deep breath. She was tingling with excitement, and she knew without a doubt that when she walked through the door of Dane’s house, her life would change forever. But she wanted it. She wanted Dane.
Chapter Seventeen
Dane made them each a small veggie omelet and they watched a couple episodes of the science show Bryn had grown to love. But Dane could tell Bryn wasn’t really concentrating on the show.
Wanting to keep her off-kilter, Dane ran his hand up and down her arm, loving the goosebumps that arose in its wake. He took out her hair tie and brushed his fingers through the silky tresses. He leaned down and inhaled the smell he’d forever associate with her, and made sure his nose brushed the sensitive nape of her neck as he did so.
He could tell Bryn was ready to either stand up and rip all her clothes off or run screaming out of the house because she wasn’t ready for what he wanted to do to her. If he had a vote, it’d be for the former rather than the latter. He had to tread carefully; the last thing he’d ever do was anything that would knowingly hurt the amazing woman by his side.
When the second episode had ended, Dane stood up and held out his hand to her. “Come with me?”
She nodded and grabbed hold of his hand as if she were drowning and he was the only person who could save her. He led the way to his bedroom and kicked off his shoes. She followed his lead and did the same. Dane wasn’t wearing his prosthetic, which she’d said she preferred when they were alone together at either of their homes. He also felt more normal when he didn’t have it on, so was glad she felt the same way.
“Lie down, sweetheart, before you fall down.”
Bryn jerkily scooted up on the bed and lay down, her head on the pillow, and held her breath, her hands twitching at her sides. He could tell she was worrying about what exactly they were about to do.
Just as it seemed she was starting to panic, Dane ordered, “Breathe, Smalls. Deep breaths. I’m not going to do anything that doesn’t feel good…for both of us.”
Bryn let out the breath she’d been holding in a whoosh. “I’m not good at this,” she blurted out. “I like you a lot and I don’t want to be a disappointment.”
Dane leaned over and rested his weight on his elbows on the bed next to her upper arms. He trailed the fingers of his hand along her arm lightly, trying to gentle her. He felt her hands come up and fist his T-shirt at his sides. “I can promise you, I’m not gonna be disappointed. If anything, I’m the one who should be nervous.”
“You? Why?”
“You know this is the first time I’ve done this since I was injured.”
“Yeah, so? It was your arm that was hurt, not your penis.”
Dane resisted the urge to chuckle at hearing her call his dick a penis. He loved the way Bryn always said whatever was on her mind. It should make their lovemaking interesting, to say the least.
“True. But in the past, when I was with someone, I never had to worry about where to put my hands. I could support my weight wherever and however I needed to without having to think about it. But that’s impossible now. I’ve only got one hand. I can only do one thing at a time. If I want to make sure you’re wet enough to comfortably take me, I can’t simply reach down and caress you like I might’ve in the past.”
Dane could tell she was thinking over what he said.
After a moment, she said simply, “I can see how that might be an issue. But I know you, I’m sure you’ll compensate somehow.”
Dane felt his stomach unclench at her words. She had such confidence in him. It was a heady feeling. “So relax, Smalls. Yeah?”
“I talk too much.”
Dane couldn’t stop the smile that spread across his face that time. “You don’t.”
“I do,” Bryn insisted. “The last time I did this, the guy put his hand over my mouth and said that he couldn’t come when I was blabbering.”
“Fucker,” Dane said as he frowned down at her. “Bryn, I’ve hung out with you long enough to know this about you, and think it’s cute as all get out how you say exactly what you’re thinking. Not only that, but I like it. I don’t have to worry about whether I’m screwing something up or saying the wrong thing. You’ll either tell me or I can take one look at your expressive face and figure it out. It’s refreshing, and it honestly makes me more comfortable. Especially here in bed. The last thing I want is to hurt you, or do something that you don’t enjoy. Knowing you’ll speak up and tell me, and not make me guess what you like, is an incredible turn-on. So nothing you say while I’m inside your hot, wet body, will have any effect on whether or not either of us orgasm…except maybe to speed it up.”
“I told him that the average man ejaculates anywhere from a teaspoon to a tablespoon when he orgasms.”
Dane put his weight on his
left elbow and moved his right hand to the hem of her T-shirt, slowly moving it up her belly and chest as she spoke. He saw her take a deep breath and felt her back arch into his hand as he cupped her left breast. “Interesting. What else?”
“When masturbating, seventy-five percent of men reach orgasm within two minutes.”
“Sounds about right,” Dane murmured as he pulled the cup of her bra down so he had better access to her nipple. He plumped the tissue and caught the small bud between his fingers, rolling and tugging on it until it was stiff and hard. “Like that, Smalls?”
“Yeah. Oh yeah. Every time you do…that…I feel it between my legs.”
Dane swallowed hard. Fuck, she was amazing. “What can you tell me about nipples?” He didn’t take his gaze from her face, wanting to make sure everything he did to her was still arousing and not making her uncomfortable.
“Some people find that the tops, sides, or bottoms of their breasts are more sensitive than their nipples.”
Dane could tell Bryn wasn’t really thinking about what she said, which made the fact that she could still recite random facts even more amazing. “Like this?” he asked, moving his fingers so they were lightly brushing around her nipple, but not touching it directly. Then he trailed his index finger around the bottom and side of her tit, testing her reaction to his touch.
“Dane,” she protested, arching her back, trying to get him to touch her nipple again. “It feels good, but not like…” Her words trailed off as she whimpered, obviously wanting his fingers back where they’d been before.
“Guess we figured out what you like best, huh? Nipples for you all the way. Good to know.” Dane moved to her other breast, pulling the cup down on that side as well. “I’m figuring out how best to please you as I go, but I can tell one thing that’s gonna be tough…” He purposely let his sentence hang in the air.
