by Trudi Jaye
The only problem was that she’d also seen it not happening. She just didn’t know which one was the real vision.
A shoulder bumped into hers and she glanced at Sam, standing next to her. They were near the backstage entrance in the top corner of the big top. As they watched, the audience was streaming in through the two official entrances, and the noise level was going up as more and more people filled the seats. Music from the orchestra flowed around in the background, and the striped tent loomed overhead, fairy lights twinkling down on them from the rigging around the high wire.
Her palms started to sweat.
“How often do you get to watch the show?” asked Sam.
Celestine shook her head. “I don’t, not usually. I went to the Winter Spectacular last year. And I’ve seen Missy practicing a few times.” She tried not to seem panicky, but it didn’t work.
“You’re always working?”
She nodded. “Even while the show’s on, a few people wander the sideshows.” Her vision this afternoon had been based on Missy, who’d been standing a few feet away. The implications of this weren’t lost on her—it meant her power had strengthened, probably due to Sam’s connection to the Carnival.
There was no longer a way to control when and how she dove into her visions just by keeping herself from touching other people. The thought made her cringe and her heart race.
She wished she hadn’t agreed to come to the circus show. Her whole body was tensed in case she had another vision. To make it worse, the visions she was seeing were completely useless, just multiple images piled on top of each other.
Sam’s ability was supposed to amplify her talent, but it was more like it had been taken away from her, leaving her with nothing but the seizures and the fear.
“Why are we doing this again?” she asked, her voice raw.
“We’re searching for Veronica.”
Celestine shook her head. “I think I’m going to faint. I need to get out of here.” She turned, fleeing through the tent flap and out into the fresh evening air. Sam followed immediately behind her.
They were at the back of the massive tent, near where the circus performers dressed and waited for their turn. Circus folk milled around this area, but the huge swathes of punters were on the other side of the tent.
“You okay?” asked Sam, his expression concerned.
Celestine nodded. “I don’t think I can do it. I’m....” She broke off. She couldn’t admit she was afraid.
“I’m sorry.”
She looked up at him sharply. “What are you sorry for?”
“It’s my fault this is happening to you. My amplification abilities are messing with your talent.”
“You’re not doing anything to me on purpose. I don’t blame you for any of it.”
“It’s still my fault, whether I’m doing it on purpose or not.”
Celestine shrugged. “It doesn’t matter.” She hesitated. “But I can’t go back in there. I think I need to go back to my trailer.”
“I’ll come with you,” said Sam immediately.
“No, they need you. You know what Veronica looks like. We need someone to sound the alert if she tries to show her face at the performance.”
Sam shook his head. “There are others who know what she looks like.”
“I’ll be fine. This is about protecting the Carnival. Go.” She pushed at his shoulder, and Sam allowed her to guide him back toward the tent.
He glanced back over his shoulder. “I’ll come check on you as soon as the show is finished,” he said.
Celestine nodded. “I’ll see you soon.” She lifted one hand in a small wave and then turned, eager to get away from all the people. She felt twitchy, like her body was about to go into a seizure. It could happen anywhere, at any time. She glanced back toward the big top. What if she had a vision on her way home? She could knock her head or break something if she fell the wrong way. Maybe she should have let Sam come with her? She frowned. When had she become so pathetic? She could damn well get herself home.
Celestine walked quickly down the main strip. She just had to get through this section of the Carnival, and then she would be in the trailer compound.
As she passed the hot dog stand, a whisper of a vision slithered into her head, and she shivered. It was dark and smoky, not yet formed properly. She started to shake, but tried to fight it. She managed to stumble into the space between the hot dog stand and another stall before her knees buckled and she tumbled to the ground, holding out her hands to break her fall. As she collapsed, she grazed one leg against the rough wooden edge of a sideshow stall, and her head hit the metal pole keeping the stall in place. She landed with a thump on the ground, the breath knocked out of her, and spots appearing in front of her eyes. Nearby, the brightly colored Carnival signs offering massive stuffed toys in return for hitting the skittles wavered in and out of focus.
Then it all disappeared and she was in the misty rainbow world that preceded her visions. As ever, she paused to take a deep breath and prepare herself for whatever was to come. Her whole body trembled as Veronica’s face appeared, contorted in rage. Red veins stood out on her neck and her mouth was snarled up like a rabid dog’s. She looked like a wild animal running on violent instinct, no longer able to reason.
Celestine’s heart was pounding like it was trying to escape from her chest, and she felt like she’d been running for miles. Veronica’s fury was a palpable entity, like a vaporous mist that would poison all who strayed too close. Celestine instinctively held her breath, not wanting to breathe it in.
And then it was gone.
Celestine braced herself against the hard wooden side of the stall, trying to ease her trembling. Hard earth jabbed into the grazed and bleeding skin on her leg, and the sideshow wall was cold against her cheek.
What had she seen? Had it been Veronica’s future?
She didn’t know. It had happened so quickly, the vision had stopped almost before it started. She managed to pull herself up, rubbing her face.
She’d always thought of her ability to see the future as a curse. Growing up never able to say no to her father and then under the control of her greedy brothers had never seemed much of a life. When she’d been forced to run and hide, it had just seemed like an extension of the same curse. It had never occurred to her that she might one day miss it and wish for it back.
But that’s exactly what was happening. Ever since she’d gone into the Carnival dreamscape, her powers had changed, evolved, but not in a good way. Seeing all possible futures at the same time was as useless as witnessing a close-up of Veronica in a rage.
In fact, she was no longer much help to anyone.
A sob broke out of her mouth, escaping into the air without warning. Another one followed, and after that, nothing Celestine could do would halt the flow of gut-wrenching sobs that emerged from deep inside her. She’d never cried about her life before, not when her mother died, not when her brothers forced her into working day and night for them, not when she was running from her brothers, desperate and alone. But it all seemed to gush out of her now. Who was she if she couldn’t tell the future?
After a while the wracking sobs eased and she managed to start breathing normally again. She felt better for getting the pent up emotions out of her system, but it wasn’t doing her any good lying here on the ground. She wiped her nose on her sleeve, wishing she were the kind of person who carried a handkerchief.
Celestine pulled herself to her feet. The evening lights twinkled across the sideshows and thrill rides, the warm black night providing a perfect backdrop for the fun of the Carnival. People walked past, everyone involved in their own private lives, none of them paying any attention to her problems.
She sighed and continued on to her trailer.
She heard boisterous applause from the big top, and checked her watch. The circus show was about halfway through. She was sure she’d have felt it if Veronica had turned up for the show. The more she thought about it, the more she bec
ame convinced that the image of Veronica had been her finding out that she wasn’t going to be able to go ahead with her planned attack on Missy. Did that mean she was seeing things happening in the present as well? Her powers had never been so confusing.
Her home was dark and quiet when she let herself in. She went straight to the bed, unable to even think about getting changed. Her head hit the pillow, and she closed her eyes, smiling when a warm lump moved over to lie against her.
Artemis started purring, her large furry form rumbling against her side.
“You’re always here for me, aren’t you Artemis?” said Celestine.
Artemis rubbed her head against her arm, then lay down.
His purring soothed her senses and she was able to think clearly again. Now they knew the threat from Veronica was real and imminent, the Carnival would be on high alert. They’d be watching for the woman, and would probably be able to stem whatever mischief Sam’s former boss and—what did you call someone who’d controlled you by force? His controller? It sounded too tame. Like a train conductor.
His owner. His master.
The woman who forced him to do things against his will.
She understood that. Her brothers had forced her to keep working when she was too tired to keep going.
But they’d never forced her to hurt or maim another person. And if she understood Sam’s tortured words, that’s precisely what Veronica had made him do.
She was evil. They needed every weapon they could use in the battle against this woman.
And her own ability, the one thing they had over her, was now useless.
Celestine punched the pillow and turned on her side. Artemis meowed grumpily as she repositioned herself.
How was she going to tell which of the many possible futures she was seeing was most likely to happen? She needed to find some trick that would help her discern which one was their most likely future.
Her mind was so busy she didn’t notice the passage of time until her alarm clocked pinged. Glancing over, she saw that it was one in the morning. It was the time she’d often gone out to try to find problems to fix around the Carnival.
She was still wide-awake, her mind a jumble of thoughts and options.
Celestine shrugged to herself. She was still dressed; perhaps she could try some of the options she’d been considering on the Carnival, to see if she could make her talent useful again.
Walking out into the cool early summer air, Celestine took a deep breath. It could be worse. She was alive, and she had friends who would help her hide from her brothers.
Chapter 29
It had been a long night. Sam walked slowly along the trailer alleyway, his hands in his pockets and the world on his shoulders. For some reason, Celestine had been convinced that Veronica would attend the show tonight and when they hadn’t spotted her, it had been a huge anticlimax. At least it was for Sam. He felt like his skin was crawling with insects, making him edgy and uncertain.
He wanted to go for a run.
He’d meant to go check on Celestine after the show, but he’d been waylaid by Jack. The Ringmaster had taken one look at Sam’s face and told him to follow him back to the trailer he shared with Rilla. They’d spent the last couple of hours drinking whiskey and practicing Jack’s absorbing skills. It wasn’t necessarily a good mix, but now that Sam was joined to the Carnival, Jack’s absorbing ability was even stronger, and the Ringmaster was grimly determined to get it under control.
Another problem he was responsible for. He swayed a little as he stumbled along.
Around him, the main lights were out, leaving only the security ones glowing in the dark. The Carnival itself was quiet. Or at least as quiet as it ever was. The occasional soft voice carried across the still night air, and the whirr of generators was a faint comforting hum in the background. He knew Frankie’s cameras were watching, but it still felt like he was alone out here. There was something soothing about being the only person walking around after the extreme crowds that had been there earlier. He took a deep breath and his lungs filled with clean fresh air mixed with cotton candy and French fries. He smiled.
Metal grated on metal somewhere behind him. Sam halted. Sound carried on a clear night like this, and the sound hadn’t been from the trailer compound.
Someone was roaming the main Carnival.
Sam took another breath. It was probably nothing. A stray cat checking out the strange tents in its territory.
Or maybe it was Celestine’s brothers. Or Veronica. He swayed and righted himself against the nearest trailer.
They had too many enemies for him to take something like this lightly.
He ran as quietly as he could back toward the main strip, where the noise had come from. His heart pounded in his chest. What if it was Veronica? What would he do with her? The thought was tantalising.
Then his heart stuttered and he slowed to a fast walk. He still had nothing to use against her, no useful magic that could knock her out. What if she put another block on him?
The thought was almost enough to make him turn around. But he clenched his hands into fists and kept going. He wasn’t going to give in to the fear. Veronica no longer owned him, and he could make his own choices.
A small voice was telling him that this was the wrong choice, but he made it anyway.
The strip was empty. He stayed to the shadows and peered up and down the alleyways, trying to find the source of the noise.
He heard it again. Metal clanged somewhere, and he crept closer to where the sound came from. His throat was suddenly dry and he swallowed. This was it. He was going to see Veronica again after all these months.
How would he react? He didn’t know; his brain was too full of the terrifying ghostly images that thinking about Veronica always gave him. People hurt and dying. Calling out, asking, begging for his help.
His attempts to help them.
Pain. Terror. Death.
Everything around him started spinning, and he grabbed the side of the nearest stall to steady himself. His breathing was coming in ragged gasps, and his heart was pounding. He felt like he’d just done a hard-core run up the side of a mountain. If he confronted Veronica right now, she’d win. It was a fact. He knew it.
But he also knew that he couldn’t leave her to rummage around in the Carnival by herself, doing who-knew-what to their equipment.
He stood up properly again and took the last few steps to the corner of the stall. He looked around the edge, where the noise had been coming from.
There was a slight figure down the end of the small alleyway.
He rubbed his sweaty hands against his trousers. “Hey! Leave that alone,” he called out.
The figure jerked back as if they’d been stung. It was a woman, he could tell that much. She turned, and he let out his breath.
Not Veronica.
Celestine.
“What on earth are you doing here?” he asked, more harshly than he meant to.
Celestine came forward, and the tears rolling down her cheeks became more obvious. Sam moved forward, pulling her into his arms without thinking about it.
She hesitated and then laid her head on his shoulder with a sigh. But he knew she’d made sure there was no skin-to-skin contact before she did it.
“What’s the matter?” he asked, softly this time.
“It’s not working anymore,” she said. “At least it is, but it’s not working the way it should. I’m seeing every possibility, instead of the most likely right now. “
“Is that why you had to leave the show?”
She nodded against his shoulder. “It’s just a jumble of confusing images.”
“We’ll talk to the others. There must be something we can do.”
Celestine shook her head miserably. “What if there’s not? What if this is how it is for me from now on? I can barely concentrate. I have multiple images of you being captured and killed by Veronica in various places around the Carnival going through my head right now, and I don’t
know how to deal with it.”
“I thought you had to be touching the person?”
“Not anymore. Just being close to them is enough.”
“Is that what happened with Missy? I thought she must have touched you somehow.”
Celestine shook her head. “I really thought Veronica would be here tonight. That particular image was more powerful than the others.” She wiped one hand over her face. “I even thought I felt Veronica earlier. Like I’d walked past her or something. But I don’t know if it was real or imaginary.”
“Come on, let’s go back to your trailer. It’s late at night. Too late to be wandering around like this.”
“I used to be able to help the Carnival. Protect it. But now I’m useless.”
“You’re not useless. We’ll figure out how to make this better. I promise.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” said Celestine softly.
They walked back slowly to Celestine’s place, Sam holding Celestine around the shoulders. She must have been distracted, because she let him do it. He figured it wouldn’t matter if he was just walking beside her or holding her—she was going to get visions either way. At least it didn’t seem to be giving her seizures for the moment.
He managed to get her up the stairs and into her tiny home without hassle and helped her crawl back into her bed. She closed her eyes and curled up, facing Sam.
“I’ll leave you now,” he said. Unable to help himself, he reached out, holding his palm against her cheek. “Get some sleep.”
“Stay,” whispered Celestine. “Stay with me. I don’t want to be alone.” She moved over and patted the bed beside her.
Sam hesitated. But Celestine, who was already half asleep, didn’t mean anything more than just lying next to her. He kicked off his shoes and crawled into the small bed, fully clothed.
She snuggled in next to him like a cat, and he put his arms around her, holding her against him. He let out a breath. “Are you still getting visions about me?” he whispered.
