by Jordan Marie
“Fuck no. I don’t, because you won’t tell me shit! So, tell me so I can end this sorry son of a bitch once and for all and stop my woman living in fear all the time!”
She yanks my shirt off, throws it at me, slides on a blue t-shirt of hers, and then finishes turning, staring at me. Her face is a combination of fear, anger and…fuck I’ve seen that face. I know that face. She’s going to run. Just like Melly, she’ll run, and I won’t be able to save her. Only this time it will destroy me. I loved Mel, I did in a sweet and young love kind of way. We would have been happy, but Dani…fuck, she owns me.
“I told you shit. I told you it didn’t matter. I told you I got away and asked you to leave it alone. You told me you would. You lied, Zander…I trusted you. I gave myself to you! You’re the first man I’ve ever willingly given myself to, and you lied! You have no idea…none. My God! If Michael knows someone is searching for him, it’s just a matter of time. You’ll have killed the only people in the world I care about.”
“Damn it, stop being a drama queen! He’s one fucking man! I got this shit. You just need to trust me.”
“Drama queen? That man you’re trying to bring back to Kentucky, bring back to me, is evil.”
“I can be too, especially when a son of a bitch is messing with someone I love!”
She stops and I think, finally. Finally, I’ve gotten through to her.
“What you’ve done could kill the only people I’ve ever loved. Nicole and Ray are all I have in the world. You could have killed them. Hell, what you did still might.”
Her words slice me open in a way no blade ever could.
“You have me, damn it!”
She looks at me with tears pouring down her face.
“I don’t want you.”
“What the hell, damn it, Dani!”
“Get out!”
“I’m not going…”
“Get the fuck out. I wanted to find out about sex. I wanted no strings. I wanted your dick—not you! That’s why I kept us a secret! I thought we were just having fun. This is not fun anymore. I don’t want you in my life. Get the fuck out!”
I thought we were just having fun. I wanted your dick—not you…
Well hell, I don’t need a brick house to fall on me. Or shit maybe I did, because it sure feels like something has slammed on my chest and is not allowing me to breathe. I leave with a slam of the door. Fuck this, ain’t no pussy worth this shit.
25
Dani
It’s only been a few days. and I ache for him. I crave him. I’m on day three of hell. Living here at the club and seeing Zander every day, but not talking to him, not touching him, or even having his smile when we pass, is destroying me. I regretted the shit I said to him the minute I did it. I just couldn’t stop. The thought that Zander was out there trying to find Michael, chills me to the bone. If Michael knew where I was, he wouldn’t rest until he killed Zander. He wouldn’t stand for any man touching what he deemed his property. Hell, he killed the gardener for just smiling at me once. He bragged for a week on how he made it appear the man had accidentally locked himself in the greenhouse and the propane heater had a malfunction causing carbon monoxide to build up. He would torture Zander just to get to me, because he would know it would hurt me.
Zander thinks he and the club can handle Michael. He has no idea how powerful Michael is. He doesn’t know who Michael has in his back pocket, or the shit he has on government officials that assures he’s not going to get caught. He thinks Michael is a fuck-up who gets his rocks off on beating women. If he knew the truth? There would be no controlling Zander on avenging me. Or even worse, Michael would do just like he had done with the doctors and the police. He would tell Zander about my hospital stay in Rose Hill and convince him I was insane. He would convince Zander that he was the wronged husband trying to heal the crazy woman. I’ve seen him do it over and over. I couldn’t handle that look in Zander’s eyes. It would destroy me.
Michael can’t be stopped. The fact that he had me admitted into a psychiatric facility so easily, just because I refused to marry him, showed me that. It made me fall in line—well, after being locked up for a month. Had I known the brutal hell that awaited me on the outside, I would have gladly spent the rest of my days behind the gray walls and steel bars of Rose Hill. Besides, everything that Michael has gotten away with since then shows me he’s invincible. From the murders, to the cops in his back pocket, to the doctors who sided with him, along with the lawyers, and court judges—with all those on his side, there’s nothing Zander could do to Michael. Trying would either put him behind bars like Dancer, or get him killed. I can’t risk either. I love him.
I need to move. I can’t go back to the house because Carrot Top and Dancer have moved in there. I should go back to Ray and Paul’s. I have a room there, they want me. I can’t bring myself to move away from Zander. At least not yet. The thought of not seeing him every day, at least from a distance brings a panic more intense than any I’ve ever had.
I’m out back of the main Savage MC Compound, where they usually have the parties and bonfires. I’m sitting on an old picnic table thumbing through the rental adds in the local London newspaper. My heart’s not in it. It’s just not. I’m about to highlight a listing that’s downtown next to the restaurant that Nic and I like to eat at a lot, when a large hand swipes the paper away.
“What the fuck is this?”
Zander.
“It’s a newspaper, Captain Obvious.”
“You aren’t fucking leaving, Dani.”
“There’s no reason for me to stay here anymore, Phoenix has been caught,” I tell him, referring to the man who tried to get revenge on Dancer and the rest of the crew. “In fact, all the Savage Brothers’ drama has quieted down. Nicole is growing fat and planning a wedding, Carrie is growing fat and playing house with Dancer. All is right with the world. It’s time I strike out on my own.”
“You don’t think I’m reason enough for you to stay here?”
Yes! My heart cries. I ignore it, for a question I need to know the answer to. “Did you stop looking for Michael, yet?”
Silence.
I nod in response. “Then no, you aren’t enough,” I lie.
“So, it’s all your way or no way, Hellcat?”
“On this? Yeah, it is.”
“If I agree? If I give up and accept your terms and stay away from searching this Michael out? What do I get?”
“What do you want?” I ask, my heart hammering in my chest.
“You.”
“You had me.”
“Without restrictions. No more sneaking, no more hiding that you’re mine. You take my claim, you wear my jacket and you fucking wear my name.”
Again, my heart screams yes. Then, I remember that Michael is out there, and I remember what he could do to Zander, and I…panic. I want to. Would it be safe? Michael would never look for me in the midst of a motorcycle club. It wouldn’t ever occur to him that the woman he once knew would do that. Would it be fair to Zander?
“I’m…scared,” I whisper quietly, because ultimately it all boils down to that.
“Have I ever done anything Hellcat, to make you think you should fear me?”
“I need to go slowly, Zander. I have to…”
“I have to have more than we did before.”
My stomach knots up. I understand, but it doesn’t make it any easier.
“I liked what we had before…”
His hand pulls my chin up so my eyes meet his. I will never get over the fact that this man could easily be a Greek god. His dark eyes pull me in, and they refuse to let me go.
“Hellcat, give in.”
“Why are you making this all or nothing?”
“Because woman, I love you. Do you not fucking get that?”
It’s the second time he’s said it really. The first time, I didn’t allow myself time to think on it. This time I try to let the words sink in.
“You promise me, Zander. If I tell
you more about me…about why I’m this way…you’ll stop seeking out Michael. You’ll help me move forward and give me time?”
“As long as you really try, then abso-fucking-lutely, Hellcat.”
“I love you…” I whisper, because I feel like he should know.
“Hellcat,” his voice drops down to a whisper. It’s thick and full of emotion, but I push ahead before I can second guess myself.
“I warned you. I am broken, Zander. I can’t give you what you want. At least not right now.”
“What are you gaining by keeping us secret, Hellcat? Tell me.”
I think about his question—really think about it. It might not make sense, but I’m protecting him. If people don’t know, if it’s not common knowledge, then if the devil finds me Zander won’t be a target.
“Safety,” I tell him. He looks confused. He doesn’t get it, I can tell from the look in his eyes.
“This back and forth, push and pull needs to stop between us.”
I don’t know what to say to that, so I just stay quiet.
“If I agree to this shit? If I give you a little more time, you’re going to tell me about your past. You’re going to trust me, and you are going to accept my claim, eventually. Let me hear those words out of that damned mouth of yours.”
Just agreeing to this is causing my heart to stutter and a cold, clammy sweat to pop out over my body. “If you promise to leave Michael alone, then yes,” I confirm.
“And you’ll be in my bed tonight?”
I don’t even have to think about that answer. “Definitely.”
“Then we have a deal, Hellcat.”
26
Crusher
I’m lying through my fucking teeth, but if it gets my woman back in my bed, if it gets me the names I need to end the son of a bitch who hurt her and most of all gets her to the point where she will finally accept my claim, then I will lie. Fuck, the truth is, after a few days and nights without her, I’d do almost anything.
“Isn’t it kind of early to go to bed?” she asks as we make it back to my room. I lock the door with a lazy smile.
“If we were going to bed, maybe.”
She turns and looks at me, and I can tell she’s nervous, but she’s also excited. She wants this.
“Hellcat, I should warn you, this won’t be my finest hour, because I want you too damn much to make it last,” I say, while stripping.
“The fact that you’re saying it will last an hour proves you’re wrong,” she says, taking her clothes off too.
Any other time I’d undress her, but I am dying here. I’ve spent the last two nights without her and fuck me, I need her. When I look up, she’s finishing taking off her panties and bra. She’s beautiful. I’ve always known it, but right now it’s driven home what a lucky bastard I am. Dani and I have so much back and forth arguing, then fucking and then arguing some more, sometimes I give myself whiplash. The truth is I don’t know shit about relationships, and Dani’s so messed up from her fucker of an ex, that I doubt it could be any different, but even with all the conflict—it’s better than anything I’ve ever had. It’s better than anything I’ve ever imagined.
I take her in my arms and instantly that empty spot that has haunted me the last few nights, is gone. She links her hands behind my neck and pulls my head down to her lips. Her warm skin is pressed against mine, but it’s still not close enough. I don’t think it ever will be.
“I’ve missed you, Zander,” she whispers, her sweet lips grazing my five o’clock shadow, her teeth nibbling the same path.
“God, I have missed you too, baby. Climb up here on the bed, and let me love you,” I demand, anxious to get inside of her.
“I…I don’t want that,” she says, pulling back slightly, and disappointment swamps me.
“Hellcat, I know you…”
“Sit down on the bed, Zander,” her quiet plea has me catching my breath. I’ve always been the type to demand what I want in the bedroom, but right now I can think of nothing I’d rather do than obey Dani. I don’t know what she has in mind, but I’m anxious to find out.
I turn so my back is to the bed. I keep one of her hands in mine and my eyes on her. I back up the few steps it takes until my legs hit the mattress. I sit down. Slowly she lowers down in front of me on her knees. I don’t know how it’s possible but two emotions war with each other immediately. First and foremost is the urge to scream yes at the top of my lungs. Then guilt, because I know she’s scared of this. I don’t know why, but I do know whatever the story is behind it, will be bad.
“Dani, sweetheart, you don’t have to do this,” I tell her, and I end my sentence on a groan as she takes my cock in her warm hand and strokes it once.
“I want to do this, Zander. I might be a little unsure, but I’ve been imagining giving you this for weeks. I want to make you happy. I want to give you pleasure.”
“My sweet, Hellcat,” I whisper, bending down to kiss her. “I love that you want that, but it shouldn’t be all about me. Anything we do together should bring us both pleasure. If it doesn’t then we shouldn’t do it.”
“But…how?” she asks confused, and I’m not exactly sure what she’s asking, but I go with it.
“How about you just play a little and if you don’t like it you climb up on my dick and ride me?” I ask. When she still looks nervous, I add, “Anytime Hellcat, you never have to do anything here. I want you, just you and anyway I can get you., I tell her, trying to reassure her. Then, I wait to see what happens.
Her hand reaches down first to cup my balls. I want to moan out loud at the way she gently massages them, as if she is testing their weight. Her hand comes up and wraps around my cock and pumps it up, and then slowly down.
“Before you, Zander…do you know I thought a man’s penis was ugly? I would have been happy never seeing another one in my life,” she says, stroking me one more time.
“They all are, except for Junior, Hellcat. Not even worth your time,” I tell her, trying to joke, but the words come out in a moan, because she places a chaste kiss against the head of my dick.
She rubs her lips together. I know she tastes me, because my cock is weeping for her. I hold my breath, wondering what will happen next. I don’t have a long wait. She runs her tongue over my head again, gathering more fluid and bringing it into her mouth. I watch her tongue move and become hypnotized with the movements. I’m so lost that I’m completely unprepared for the way her mouth slides down over the head. I want her to go further. It takes all I have, not to grab her by the hair and push her farther down on me. I catch my hands half way there and divert them to her tits. I don’t want to scare her. Her nipples are hard and begging for attention. I roll them between my thumb and index fingers, teasing them. Her mouth slides down a little more on my shaft, and I tug on her nipples as a reward, before going back to playing with them gently. One of her hands is still massaging my balls, and it feels so good I could honestly come from just this alone. That won’t happen though, because she slides further down my cock nearly taking my entire length into her mouth. Heaven—motherfucking heaven.
I groan out loud from the combination of the soft, wet hot haven of her mouth and the way her tongue is caressing my length. She holds still and looks up at me with her eyes. My hand shakes like a fucking school boy as I move her hair out of the way. I’ve been a man whore. I love women, and I love fucking, but I don’t think I’ve seen anything sexier in my life than the sight of Dani on her knees in front of me, her mouth full of my cock, her eyes dark with need, and my hands full of her breasts.
“It feels good, Hellcat,” I’m lying, because it’s so fucking more than good. I’m not sure there are words invented to describe it. “Suck me, baby. Suck my dick hard, please?” I add, holding her breasts completely in my hands, squeezing them repeatedly, loving the way they contract and expand in my hands.
Dani’s eyes close, and she sucks hard. She works my cock with her mouth while using her hand to stroke me at the same time.
If I allowed myself, I would have already shot my load. Someday soon, I plan on coming this way. Just not today. I move my hands under her arms lift her up. She reluctantly lets go of my cock with a popping noise. She stands up on her own and looks down at me in confusion.
“What? Why did you stop me? Was I doing it wrong?”
“Hellcat, listen to me. Nothing you give me will ever be wrong.”
“Then what…”
“I need the taste of your pussy on my tongue.”
“Right now? But I was enjoying sucking on you. I wasn’t done,” she says almost in a pout, and I grin. It will take us a while to get there, but this woman is perfect for me.
“That’s good because you’re going to keep doing it,” I answer, and then I lie back on the bed. “Climb up here and sit on my face, Hellcat. I’m about to show you why sixty-nine is the best fucking number ever made.”
She looks unsure, but crawls up on the bed and straddles my face.
“That’s it baby, now lie down against me and take my cock back in that beautiful mouth of yours, while I make you feel good.”
It takes her a few minutes to get settled, but she stretches out and slowly my cock slides back into that hot little mouth. I moan out my pleasure against her pussy. I use my tongue to delve into her hole and then back out to flick that hard, little clit over and over, lashing it. I push my finger into her ass and use my other hand to push her deep into me, encouraging her to ride my face. Her pussy tastes so sweet and tangy; I know it’s a taste that I will need every day for the rest of my life.
We work together, as if we’ve been fucking together our entire life. She’s devouring my cock while I’m trying to do the same with her juicy little cunt. Her essence is sliding along her legs and bathing my face. Her clit is so hard it quivers every time I run my tongue over it. When she starts rotating her hips against my face, clenching so fucking hard she could smother me and riding me faster and faster—I know we’re close to the end. That’s good, because my balls are so full, I’m about to lose it. I use her own wetness, by gathering it on my fingers and then sliding them into her tight little ass. I begin fucking her ass hard with two fingers, doing my best to keep her pussy hard against my mouth, and eating her out like a starving man. She’s taken the entire length of my shaft in her mouth. I tongue fuck her over and over in tandem with my fingers, using my free hand to grind her back and forth on my face. She has all of my cock and sucking it so hard, I’m surprised she’s not choking on it. Then she groans, the sound vibrating against my dick. Her pussy spasms, and I know she’s done. She comes all over my face. I drink her in, continuing to fuck her harder and harder, not allowing her to come down. As her second orgasm begins on the heels of her last one, I lose it. My cum jets into her mouth. I hear her grunt and her mouth slides up letting cool air hit my dick. I jerk and quiver in her hand, as she continues sucking on my head, swallowing me down.
