by Nana Malone
I tilted my chin up.
"Ariel, I command you to tell me."
"I have reason to believe Prince Ashton is behind the assassination attempts on his brother. I went to Stanstit to get proof that Ashton is getting help from some of the guards. But clearly, I made a mistake. You were right, she shouldn't have been with me."
Sebastian frowned. "For the love of God. Do you have proof?”
I nodded and held up a flash drive. It wasn’t like I wanted to keep Sebastian from the data. I just wanted to be the one to decode it. I placed it on his desk then stepped back.
“What’s on it?"
"Personnel files on the guards."
He blinked. “Fuck, Ariel. This is a huge privacy concern.”
“With all due respect, someone in that prison is helping Ashton get messages out. The Royal Guard can’t be trusted right now. At least not those guards.”
“So what, I can’t trust Ethan?”
I frowned. “Ethan is Penny’s father. He wouldn’t betray you, but the Royal Guard are run by the Council.”
He shook his head. "I think we’ve had one too many conspiracy theories. It’s over now. You're hunting for shadows. What the hell am I supposed to do with you?"
"Well, I get it. You're angry, and if you want to suspend me or kick me out of the knights, it's fine."
His brows snapped down. "What, so you're going to run away from this too?"
"I do not run."
Except for that time you quit the guard.
"Really? I seem to recall you leaving the Royal Guard. You can't just run away from your problems."
"I'm not running. I'm trying to do what's best for everyone. Why does no one see that?"
"Well maybe you need to ask people what they think is best for them?"
I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, you're one to talk."
He pushed to his feet. "Excuse me?"
Holy Christ. I was headed for a one-way trip to the dungeons. "Permission to speak freely, Your Majesty."
"Well, you have already started, so you might as well continue."
"Okay, maybe I do try and control situations. I was trying to do the thing that's best for everyone."
"Yeah, you said that."
"The thing is, you trying to control Penny is bad."
"Oh, you're a relationship expert right now?"
"No, I'm not. Hell, I can't even get my own love life straight. I know you and Penny love each other, but you're stifling her, Your Majesty. You're dimming her light. You will lose her if you don't do something to change that."
For a long moment he stared at me. Then his voice was a harsh whisper. "Get out of my sight."
"Excuse me?"
"You heard me. Get. Out."
"Are you suspending me?"
"If I were you, I would get out of my sight before I start handing out punishments. I’ll deal with you later. In the meantime, resume normal shifts, and maybe it’s a good idea for you and Penny to take a break for a few days."
I turned on my heel and stormed out. When I yanked the door open, there was no one there.
I hadn't been barricaded after all. I'd been free to leave at any moment I wanted. Shit. Had I been fired?
I took the long familiar hallways and sent Penny a text as I walked. The message bounced almost immediately. Shit. Had Sebastian blocked me? If she was in that kind of trouble with Sebastian, then maybe he had blocked me.
Instead of heading right toward the North Tower and back toward the cars, I continued along the path and headed for Tristan's suite. There was a guard outside. "Hello, I'm here to see the prince."
He shook his head. "The prince isn't receiving visitors."
"Uh, just let him know I'm here. He'll see me."
The guard was new. His name was Clarence or something. I couldn't remember for sure. He was young, with honey-gold skin and whiskey-colored eyes. He'd known me as a guard. So why was he acting like this?
"Seriously, you need to go and tell him I'm waiting to see him."
Clarence started to clear his throat. "Lady Scott, I regret to inform you that you are specifically on the list of people that the prince does not want to see."
I blinked rapidly. "Oh, I see. Will you tell the prince—" What? What was I going to tell him? He was pissed off at me. I was pissed off at him. Sebastian was pissed off at me. And Penny's phone was bouncing my messages, so maybe she was pissed at me too. Fantastic.
It looked like things were just like I always worried about. I was all on my own.
Eight
Tristan…
To say that things were tense around the palace was one hell of an understatement. I had seen Penny down at the pool painting earlier. Her landscapes had been red. Angry. I'd run into Sebastian in the gardens watching her from afar, not down there with his wife.
When I had asked him about it, he said they were ‘working things out,’ which told me that it was one hell of a fight.
And then, of course, I had my own Ariel problems. I recognized that I couldn't get rid of the knights on my detail. At least not until we could prove that there was no longer a threat to my life. Once Sebastian made that determination, I could have a normal life.
As normal as you can get it.
I had asked Clarence to tell whoever was on duty that I didn't want to see her. I was too close. I needed some objectivity.
Or you're just a chicken shit.
One person I could deal with, though, was Ella. I had gotten up early just to catch her before her workout. When she came out all dressed in her yoga gear, she startled to a stop. "Oh, Tristan. I didn't know you were back."
"Yeah. We were ships in the night."
Her gaze slid to the side. "Well, I hope the trip was fruitful." She went to the fridge and pulled out a water bottle. "Well, I’m off to yoga. See you—"
"So, were you going to tell me that you helped them?"
She stopped. And then she hung her head and turned around slowly. "What do you want from me, Tristan? It was the fucking queen who called, so I told her what I could."
"You and I—” I cleared my throat. “I have protected your secrets for years, and you couldn't protect one of mine?"
"Now, you wait just a minute. I didn't tell them what Ashton did to you. I just told them that he had something on you and that you needed to get it back. That's it. Don't be a dick."
"Me not be a dick? After everything we have been through, you just rolled over? You don't even like Ariel."
"Well, you know what, she's actually doing something. You won't let anyone close. You won't let anyone help you. You just want to do everything by yourself."
"There is a reason I'm like that."
"Oh, I know. Trust me. I know. But you have to let someone help you sometimes, or you'll be all alone."
"Where is this coming from?"
"What? You ambush me in the morning, and you want to know why I helped them? You and I, we care about each other, right?"
I frowned at that. I could see that I was being led into a trap, but I hoped I could stop myself before I was dragged in. "Yes Ella, but—"
"No buts. You think you can do everything, but all it does is make you remote and untouchable. God, in the end, you wouldn't even let me help with Max. Then you told me that you don't need my help with Ashton. To be frank, I thought you'd sent Ariel instead of me."
My brows snapped down. "I don't want anyone I care about near that asshole."
"Well, how was I supposed to know?"
"You were the one who opened your mouth."
"Don't you dare. Your hero complex is going to make you end up alone. I have bent over backward to try and be what you need. I’ve tried to return the level of friendship that you provided me, but you won't let me. You won't let anyone. You haven't let anyone get too close to you."
"Where the hell is this coming from?"
"You know what? Maybe I'm finally waking up. I spent the last three years of my life loving you, but you didn't even see that I existed. I
get it. You had feelings for someone else. Fine. I guess I need to swallow that one. But you wouldn't even let her help. And while we're on this, I would defer—"
"Tread carefully."
"Oh, there you go. That famous protection thing. She doesn't need your protection. She wanted to take your brother on. Yeah, crazy, but it's all because you wouldn't talk to her. God, you think you can do everything. You think you know everything. You love a woman who no longer exists. Open your eyes, Tristan. That's not the same sixteen-year-old girl you felt like you abandoned. She's a woman now. And a badass one at that, despite how painful that is for me to say. But you're going to have to let her get close. You certainly wouldn’t let me."
"One thing has nothing to do with the other."
"If you say so. But listen, you have to come to terms with her being different and her being capable of helping you. You never let me help you. You never let anyone else. Your own cousin tried to find a way around your guard situation, and you do nothing but try and get rid of them. You have to figure it out for yourself."
I crossed my arms. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"Oh my God, you are so blind. You need to adjust. Max is in jail. He's out of the way. Either you deal with Ashton, or you don't. That's up to you. But when people try to get close to you and help you, you have to stop pushing them away. If you're going to push me away, as close as we have been all these years, fair enough. But don't push her away. Either learn to love someone else or love her like she is now, warts and all. She went up there for you."
Fantastic, Ella was angry too. “Stop, you don’t know what you're talking about.”
"Yeah, sure, he kept you guys apart. But knowing what you know of who she is now, is she the kind of woman who would go up there because of vengeance, or is she the kind of woman who would go and put herself in harm's way for someone else?"
I swallowed the acidic bile trying to climb up my esophagus.
"She could have been killed."
"Yeah, I know it. I bet you anything she knows it. So maybe you try and be grateful instead of being a dick."
My brows popped. "What did you say?"
"I'm tired of being sugar and spice and everything nice. You're wrong. If you don't want her going after Ashton, then tell her why. Tell her why it scares you. Tell her why you wouldn't let me do it. Tell her. Tell someone. Tell anyone. But you don't get to have an attitude about it. Not with me, of all people."
"I don't have a fucking attitude."
Her laugh was icy. "Oh, sure you don't. Do you think I didn't hear you skulking around here at all hours of the morning? I just ignored you and continued to have my lie in until it was time for my workout. I wasn't going to prematurely wake up and do exactly what you wanted. You were ready to take out your anger on me, but you need to take it out on the person who deserves it. Yourself. And then maybe you can come to terms with all this and do something."
"You don't understand."
"You're right. I don't understand. And you know what? I never will because you don't talk to me. And I promise you, she'll never understand either because you refuse to talk to her. So, you can just stay exactly how you are and keep everything bottled up, or you can let some of it go. That's on you. Not on me."
She grabbed her yoga mat and opened the door before I could say anything else. Fuck. How had that gone so wrong?
Ariel…
I wasn’t used to making mistakes. Somewhere between falling in love with Tristan again and trying to save his life, I'd messed up. Which I wasn't used to because I didn't usually mess up.
Are you forgetting your father?
For the last week, I had taken all the jobs in the palace that I could that allowed me to avoid Tristan.
Ethan had handed me my ass. Sebastian had handed me my ass. Roone had given me his I'm disappointed in you face. What the hell was I supposed to do with that?
By the time it was 5:30 and I was leaving the palace for the day, I still hadn't managed to talk to Penny all week outside of a brief hug and exchange we’d had in the tunnels. Sebastian had taken her phone, which accounted for the bounced messages. He’d blocked me.
He had basically grounded her, as far as I could tell. He had put so many diplomatic assignments on her plate she was too busy to get up to mischief. Of course that made me want to perform a prison break, but we both needed to tread carefully, and I knew how much they loved each other so I wasn’t going to interfere.
This day needed to be over. Well, these last several days needed to be over. I climbed in my car and leaned my head back against the headrest, wishing it was all over. Wishing I had the solid evidence I needed. I still had the evidence I’d downloaded from Stanstit. When Sebastian had insisted I hand over the files to him, I'd handed him a copy, which I knew was tantamount to treason. But it wasn't my fault, because I knew I was right.
Knowing you're right and actually pulling it off are two separate things.
And I hadn't pulled it off yet, had I? I could go back home and continue combing through the data. Zia was already on it, but two heads would make it go a lot faster. My own encryptions were lengthy to get through, which was good. It meant I had done a good job when I had worked for the Royal Guard. But I no longer worked for the Guard, so now I needed to work through all my back doors. It was one thing when you were building something so that somebody couldn't break into it. It was another thing entirely when you actually needed to break into your own stuff.
I was too tired. I just wanted to sit by the beach, have a drink, and forget for a moment.
I drove back to Royal Elite in less than five minutes. I had access to the bypass road, so there was no traffic for me. Hooray. Getting past the various gated checkpoints took the bulk of the time.
I parked in my usual spot, but instead of turning right to the underground garage, I turned left to the outside. I had worn flats that day, so I didn't need to change my shoes, and I had ditched my jacket in the SUV. At the end of my long drive, I hooked a right and headed toward the bars along the shoreline. I didn't pick the wine bar I had chosen when Ian and I had our date. Instead, I chose a smaller, more local bar. The drinks were great.
Locals liked it because it was smaller. And while it was beautiful and the views were outstanding, the posh set preferred something busier, posher. I just wanted a quiet moment.
I walked in and smiled at the bartender, Alex. “Hey Alex, can I get a gin mule over by the windows?"
"Sure thing, Ariel. Are the girls joining you?"
My gut twisted. Sure, I could have called Bryna or Jessa, if she was allowed to see me, or Jinx, to have a drink. Hell, I could have even called Neela, but she probably had her hands full with Mayzie. I just wanted to be alone. "Nope, just me. I’ve got a little work to do. Phone calls, so..." I let my voice trail off.
He nodded. "Sure thing. I'll have Lina bring it over."
"Thanks."
I took my spot and tried not to sag onto the stool. My head pounded, and to be honest, alcohol was probably not going to help, but it might dull the edges of the tension that was knotting me up.
Lina brought the mule. I took one sip and immediately didn't want it. What I wanted was to have gotten what I had gone to Stanstit for. All our planning, the two flights, the boat, the fancy footwork of renting a car on the island, my little light hack to get us the access, and I still didn't have everything I needed.
You have to let it go. You got what you got, so hopefully, Zia finds something.
It was hard handing things off. I could have spent the next week on the data myself, but I had to learn to delegate, and Zia was good with the tech stuff. Each of my team members had a distinct skill, and I had to let them do what they did best. Otherwise, what was the point of having a team?
A team that your friends helped you get.
Yeah, some friends. Likely, I would be banned from the palace any day now.
Let's not get overly dramatic.
Truthfully, I knew I was so angry because
Sebastian was right. I had put Penny's life in danger. My best friend since I was six years old. She was the Queen of the Winston Isles, and I had endangered her life on a hunch. God, I was as bad as my father.
No, it's different. You made some questionable choices. He committed treason.
I forced myself to take another sip of the cocktail as I tried to remember that and not descend into the bad place just because I was in the mood.
"Is this seat taken?"
I whipped around at the familiar voice. "Ian?"
"Yeah. Hey, beautiful. How are you?"
I was too tired to even correct him. I was far from beautiful. Also, I hadn't chosen him. I had chosen the other guy... the guy who refused to talk to me after coming to collect me like I was some recalcitrant child. And now he wasn't speaking to me. Well, fine. "Hah, you know, it's been a hell of a day."
"Looks like it. What are you drinking?"
"A gin mule, but I don't need a refill."
He glanced at my glass. "Yeah, you need to catch up."
His beer was already empty, and he'd already signaled to Alex. "I saw you come in, but I was in the corner. You didn't even see me."
"Oh, sorry about that." I sighed. I knew I should ask him to join me, but I didn't have any fucks to give about proper decorum.
But Ian went ahead and sat down.
"Ian, I'm sorry. I am shitty company right now and I have some calls to make," I lied.
"You look like you're having a hell of a day and you could use a friend."
"Ian—"
He held up his hands. "Look, I know. You chose the other guy. I'm okay with that. I can respect it. But clearly, something is wrong."
"I just… something didn't go the way I needed it to. And as a result, I messed up. I took a big risk and fell flat on my face, so I'm nursing my wounds right now. And I would really rather do that solo."
He shrugged. "What's the matter? Trouble in paradise? I know you're kickass at your job, so it can't possibly be work."
I laughed. "You'd be surprised."
"Look, I don't know exactly what you do, but I know it has something to do with Tristan. And I know you're a bodyguard, so I assume you're on his detail or something."
