“Fuck me, Jay.” The words all too easily left his lips, tearing something inside him, stabbing his heart, ripping a wound in his gut. “Do what you want.”
“Only if you keep moving with me,” Jay murmured, somehow folding up on top of him. Dean had just enough time to frown in puzzlement, when Jay grasped his erection and lifted it in a straight line on his stomach, angled it a little into the air and a hot, wet tongue, flicked around the ridge. He gasped, arched and writhed, nearly throwing Jay away from him.
“Oh, the ...” Words failed him. How could Jay manage to reach him like that while buried inside him? Even considering his length, that was some amazing feat. To be fucked and sucked simultaneously blew his mind. Jay’s gasp as he straightened up said he didn’t manage it easily, but praise be, Dean wanted to thank him for it. “I should ...” He said it softly and then bit it back, not completing the sentence.
“Should what?” Jay asked, keeping the rhythm irritatingly slow. Dean now hovered somewhere between bliss and out and out need. He might have just enough time to pull back from the brink but barely, and only if he made the decision now.
“I shouldn’t be doing this.”
“Stop thinking,” Jay told him, leaning over and flicking a tongue over a nipple. “Just feel.” He latched on and nipped. The shock of pain made every muscle in Dean’s body jolt in a heart-stopping moment of tautness, even as his arse clenched. “Tight,” he heard Jay say on a breath and a place deep inside him gasped, opened, and tipped over into a seeking, frantic delirium. Nerve-endings he hadn’t known existed came alive, sent little spurts of want through his body, calling out, waking up other sensitive spots, so that they turned in interest and followed where it led.
Stop thinking, Jay said, and he did. His body obviously knew where to take him, even if his mind was uncertain it wanted to go there. Everything opened, including his brain. He couldn’t have even said his name to save his life ‑‑ he certainly had a name, he just couldn’t remember it. He ceased to exist in anything other than this moment, even though his mind felt sharp and clear. He didn’t even try to speak. His body did the begging on his behalf. He couldn’t keep still, not even where no one could see. He yielded and grasped, both movements telling Jay to pound his arse. At the same time, he needed a firm grasp, someone to touch him.
Jay held his cock, but his fingers encircled the base, holding the blood trapped. If you squeezed the right way, you could hold off someone’s release. They hadn’t quite got to that, and Dean didn’t even know if Jay knew how to do it, but right now, he didn’t want to find out. He wanted to come. For some reason, they both looked down at his aching, throbbing cock at once.
The word please was on the tip of his tongue and he would have said it aloud when Jay began to jerk him off with long, hard, well-timed strokes. When his fingers reached the head, they pulled in over the top, gathering up the moisture there and taking it back down in a smooth, lubricating glide that made Dean shiver inside and out. The only thing better would be Jay’s mouth. Still, the only way he could describe it was delicious. He sighed. The sound was too soft, too delicate to express what he felt, and yet at the same time just right. He ached, but he didn’t care. He might feel it afterwards, but it was bearable. The other sensations that Jay’s cock stroked forth, made him willing to bear it all fucking day if he had to, not that he would last that long.
A strangled sound escaped his throat. Jay had pulled out. Before he could even form a protest, that hardness speared into him again and he almost sighed with relief. Even as his muscles relaxed, it withdrew, leaving him gasping, grasping, and making that small nether mouth spasm as it sought fulfillment. Then Jay entered him again, drawing a sound from his throat. He stared downwards and saw only a blurred image of his friend. His mouth gaped in shock and he heard Jay laugh softly, only to pull back again, this time not quite pulling out, not enough to make Dean close, but just enough so that he could feel he might. That hardness shoved, firm and fast. Then it drew back in a sensuous glide. It was like taking the rough with the smooth quite literally. The experience was one of pain and pleasure drawing together in a relentless beat. He softened and hardened by turn ‑‑ not his cock, for that remained as solid as ever, but inside where nothing could physically touch. He needed to come. He wanted it to stop. He never wanted it to end. He could do this all day and into the night.
Dean turned his head to the side to nestle his head into the bed for a minute, seeking just one moment of respite. In a way, he sought sanity, but it seemed his sense deserted him. He didn’t mean to, but he couldn’t help it. He wrapped his legs around Jay’s waist after all and urged him on, jerking with his legs, so that he used Jay to get what he wanted, using him like a living dildo, making his cock stroke in and out. In a haze, he glanced at Jay’s face to see if he was hurting him, or if there was any disappointment on his face. To his consternation, all he saw was a self-satisfied and very smug grin. Somehow, he still gave Jay exactly what he wanted and there was not a damn thing he could do about it; he couldn’t stop.
He couldn’t keep going, either. He wanted to. As disturbing as he found the idea, he just felt too damn good to stop. Jay’s nails were cutting him up now and even that pain didn’t make him want to stop. Fuck, Jay’s nails were sharp, but all it made him do was hiss, and he wanted to drive Jay to scratching him up some more. Those brown eyes closed. A frown tightened Jay’s face as his body tensed. He wasn’t the only one just barely holding off. He opened, forced Jay to spear him deep. Things tightened, drawing up, closing down, and pushing forward to that one moment when all you knew was that you were completely alive. He reached down and added his hand to Jay’s, tightening the grasp, only barely registering he could, yet knowing he shouldn’t have been able to. He didn’t remember Jay untying his hands. Those last few, hard strokes, brought him off. He bucked, all of his muscles expanding and contracting in one huge release. It was too much for Jay. To Dean’s utter shock, he felt Jay flood into him, a liquid heat shoot inside, in time with a matching pulse. Even as he did, he heard Jay gasp and felt him pull out. The sound was one almost of pain. The movement was sudden and unexpected. That was when he realised he’d been squeezing Jay’s cock with those strong internal muscles. No wonder the poor sod pulled free as soon as he finished.
He didn’t wait for their breath to ease, their heartbeats to slow. He gathered Jay up in one arm and pulled him through the sticky pool of his own sperm that coated his stomach and chest. He glanced at the tie as he did so. One of the cords hung broken and dangling. His right hand was free but the left remained fastened. He met Jay’s gaze and lifted his eyes towards his bound wrist. Jay smiled a little. The look was almost a smirk, and it seemed a giggle might not be far behind. His friend reached up and then frowned. His words came out on a soft breath that somehow managed to contain worry. “You’ve pulled this one really tight.”
Yeah, he had. Now that he was cooling down, his circulation knew it. Even the cord around his free right wrist bit in. Overall, it took them ten minutes to get Dean free of the bed and they needed scissors to do it.
* * * * *
The ache in his butt was one thing. The scratches on his arms were quite another. “Geez, you’re going to have to cut your nails,” Dean muttered. Realising what that implied, his face warmed a little. He hesitated, where he was smoothing on some antiseptic cream. It stung a little and then eased the soreness. From the quiet way Jay watched him, it appeared his comment wasn’t lost on his audience. He didn’t think he was ready to answer those kinds of questions right now.
“You don’t have to promise anything,” Jay said softly.
“I’m not.” He hadn’t meant to say that. It came out too quickly. “I mean, I can’t. Not right now.” He gave a soft smile, trying to ease the sudden awkwardness. “How do you expect me to think straight with all these tiny cuts stinging? I really didn’t know you got like that.”
Jay’s lips twitched and then spread out into a wide, closed-mouthed grin. “Yo
u’re lucky,” he murmured.
“How?”
“I sometimes bite as well.”
Dean couldn’t help it; he laughed. Standing up, he leaned forward, bending over Jay, bringing their faces together. “You,” he said, “have the face of an angel, but I’m beginning to think maybe you’re a little devil.” Their lips touched and he let the kiss happen. It was soft, a gentle exploration of lips, and the slightest heat of their tongues pressing. When he pulled back, it wasn’t too soon or too long, but just at the right moment. He had the feeling the same look of wonderment he could see on Jay’s face was alight in his own eyes. What he was going to do about that remained a tantalising and frustrating mystery.
Chapter Fifteen
He should stop staring into space, and, yet, he couldn’t help it. Every time he started doing something, all he could see was Dean under him, his hands tied above his head, pulling the long lean line of his muscles taut. The man had never looked so beautiful as in that moment when he asked Jay to fuck him. A few hours later, he left, telling Jay he would call in a couple of days.
Even so, Jay couldn’t allow that small, dark flame of hope, to smoulder. Jay had no conflicts. He knew what he wanted. He wanted to belong to Dean. What they had done the other morning was so completely fantastic and if they could be lovers if only for a little while, then he wasn’t adverse to it happening again, but ultimately, it wasn’t what he wanted. He didn’t know what had come over him, and when Dean insisted he release his legs, he’d half-expected to go on to release his hands and have one of those large appendages fasten around his neck to shake him in fury. Instead, Dean wrapped his body around Jay’s hips, encouraging him. He’d been too far gone then. He wanted to be inside Dean just once. From here on out, he didn’t mind if he never managed to do that again. He didn’t mind topping occasionally, didn’t mind indulging in any kind of play that would make Dean hot and willing, but he wanted to be the one pinned to the bed by Dean’s weight, Dean’s heat. He wanted that dark, penetrating gaze to pierce him along with other things. He wanted to belong to him.
“Well, Dean, you’ve got yourself a whore,” Jay said softly and shivered, a sudden cold trembling through him, so that he gave himself a hug. He only spoke to test out the word and now knew it for an unforgiving truth. Silently, he added, now what are you going to do with him but he couldn’t bring himself to ask that aloud. If Dean wanted him, but wanted it to remain a secret, he would have gone along with it, if he didn’t think the truth would out in the end. Yet, he couldn’t say no to him. Was he such a little tart that he would just give himself over to someone like that so completely?
He closed his eyes and saw Dean leaning in over him, calling him a demon with the face of an angel, and then moving in to kiss him. Those pupils expanded until he could see nothing, but that cool, drowning colour. Their lips brushed, their tongues teased gently, and all he noticed was warmth and affection from the other man while it was happening.
The phone rang. Jay jumped almost guiltily. Without his knowing it, his tongue had made lazy circles against his lips. He walked over and picked up the phone automatically.
“Jay, mate?” The voice had a question in it. He nodded, realised the person on the other end of the phone couldn’t see, and said, “Yes.”
“It’s Mark. Your car’s all done.”
He frowned. The date was only a couple of days into January and the day a Friday. Usually Dean and his crew would be back at work, but seeing as the date fell on a Friday, he and his father had given everyone time off until the Monday. Dean refused to say what was wrong with the car. He would only say there were things he still needed to check out first. Still, Jay hadn’t expected to hear it was repaired and ready so soon. When Dean said he would call in a couple of days to let him know, he had the suspicion that Dean actually meant he would let him know about other things as well. Either way, he hadn’t expected a call from one of Dean’s men.
“I thought ... Why are you working today?” he asked, trying to be careful of what he said, though unsure why he felt uneasy.
“Overtime,” Mark said. “You coming down or what? Dean said I could go home after you picked up the car.”
Well, if it was ready. “Is Dean there?”
“Naw. He’s cosy home with his friends and family. Me, I need the extra dough. Still, I’d like to hightail it outta here soonest.”
“Oh. Fine. I’ll be there in about twenty minutes.” He hung up, frowning, and glanced at the clock to see it read just after five. Well, at least even if Dean chose not to call, he would have the car for the weekend.
The phone rang again just as he was heading for the door. He hesitated, decided to leave it, and then let go of the open door and went back to get the call, after all. Some small, helpless part of him rather hoped it would be Dean. April’s voice came down the phone line. He had managed to avoid her since the fuss on New Year’s Eve, claiming he wanted his rest.
“Is Dean still with you?” Her tone sounded interrogating. Jay almost sighed aloud.
“No. He left yesterday.”
“Then you won’t mind a visit from your sister today.”
A cold sort of horror blanched through him. April would only have to take one look at his face and she would know what he and Dean had been doing. That, after he promised her at Christmas to give up moping after a man he probably couldn’t have seriously. He’d lied to her, of course. That was why he hadn’t been surprised when Dean told him about the most recent of their arguments. “No, I, err ...” Yeah, that was a real show of intelligence, very coherent. “I have to go out right now,” he said more intelligibly.
“So, I’ll pop by later.”
“I might go out then, as well.” A thick silence seemed to drift down the phone line the moment he said it. He shouldn’t have to explain his reasoning, but April always made him feel as if it were necessary. “I’m just going to get the car back, so I might use it and see a couple of friends I missed over the Christmas break.” He lied to her yet again, and beheld a sudden vision of sitting out in his car in the middle of nowhere just to avoid his sister. If he wasn’t careful, he might freeze to death after all.
“Oh. Well, then maybe I’ll catch up to you over the weekend.”
That meant she would drop it for now, but he only postponed the inevitable. April would question him whether he liked it or not.
* * * * *
Dean’s mobile phone rang and vibrated at the same time, making him appreciate what the phrase, to jump out of one’s skin, meant. “Excuse me,” he said to John, and turned away from him, ignoring the expression on the man’s face. He could hardly explain his reasons for being oddly jumpy. “Hello?” he said into the phone. The line crackled and popped. He gave John an apologetic look and moved to the window. He had taken up enough of John’s time. To take a call in the middle of their conversation after disturbing him at home like this, and with the man’s pregnant wife glaring at him, it didn’t seem fair to take the call. Still, life programmed you by habit. A phone rang and you answered it. The line cleared a little and a feminine voice spoke to him though he couldn’t make out who did the talking. “Who is this?”
“It’s April. Look, I just want to know ...” Static took over her voice for a moment, but he got the gist of it.
“I’m not playing at anything.”
“Sometimes you ...” More static interfered, then he heard, “know you fucked him again.” Heat flared up in his face. He glanced at John, trying to look apologetic only, hoping he wasn’t about to turn pink, and not wanting to have this particular conversation right here, this minute.
“...sodding about with the car.”
“What?” He only caught the end of that. “What are you talking about?”
“I said, why are you sodding about with the car? What did you do? Did you do something to it? Is this your sick idea of a joke? It couldn’t have been that bad for you to fix it so quickly.”
“What are you talking about? It’s not fixed.”
He moved as close to the back door and as near to the outside as he could without opening it. The chill of the glass bit into the side of his face. “It needs a new engine.”
“Then why call Jay to pick it up?”
“I didn’t.” There came a pause from her side.
“Then why is Jay on the way there now? Who called him?”
Dean couldn’t be sure, but considering what John had just told him, a strange sick feeling welled up inside. No one would knowingly hurt Jay ... would they? No one would have done something so petty as to simply not do the work on his car on purpose. Not even ...
Dean swallowed, fighting panic. Even then, it took two attempts before he could breathe again. If that bastard so much as touched his friend ...
“Meet me at the garage,” he snapped into the phone. He didn’t wait to hear April reply. He was already moving.
* * * * *
The garage could seem a warm and friendly place, almost like a second home when filled with laughing, smiling faces, and general hustle and bustle. On a dull evening like this at the beginning of January, with only one person working, it contained a cold unwelcome atmosphere. “It’s fixed?” Jay asked, looking up into Mark’s face.
“All done.” The mechanic sounded pleased.
“What was wrong with it?”
“Nothing Dean couldn’t fix with that magic touch of his.”
The tone changed. Mark no longer sounded happy. The first stirrings of true uneasiness began to creep through Jay. The sensation was similar to someone you didn’t like stroking you in intimate places. “Well, thanks. I guess I’d better be going.”
Snow Angel Page 17
