by HELEN HARDT
“Would he have adored me so much if he’d known the truth?”
“I don’t know. But what does it matter?”
“What does it matter? Are you serious?”
For Christ’s sake. The two of them were going on and on as if he weren’t in the room. “And what about me, Mia?” Jeff interjected. “What about me?”
“You were serving a life sentence. What would you have done with a child? What would I have done as a single mother?”
“You never loved Daddy,” Angie choked out.
“He never loved me either.”
Angie shook her head, rubbing her cheeks against the hotel pillow. “You shouldn’t have married him. He deserved to be loved.”
Marie held her—their—daughter’s hand. “I did it for you, Angie. For you. Can’t anyone see that?”
“Bullshit.” Angie sat up. “You did it for yourself. Your boyfriend was going to prison and you were stuck pregnant. You trapped an innocent man into a marriage neither of you wanted. I’ll never forgive you for this. Never!”
“Angie, please.”
“The girl’s right, Mia.” Jeff tried to defuse his rage. “What you did was wrong on so many levels.”
Maria sighed. “I’m not arguing that point.”
“Christ, Mia. I loved you. I would have done anything for you. For our child.”
“You couldn’t escape a prison sentence.”
“But I would have fought. I could have turned state’s evidence. I could have gotten a better lawyer. I could have…” Could have done so many things…
“I had to make a decision quickly. A decision that I thought was best for my child. You’ll be happy to know, Jeff, that Angie never wanted for anything. She had everything a little girl could want.”
“Except her real father,” Jeff said.
“You can’t take her inheritance. You can’t do this to your own daughter.”
“She’s not my daughter.” Jeff stalked forward. “You took her from me and gave her to my brother. My sainted brother. He had everything. He was the older. He had Grandpa’s love and devotion. He had everything I could never have, except you. I had you. But you took that away and gave yourself to him. You gave my child to him!”
“He wasn’t the one I loved, Jeff. You were.”
No, her words would not sway him. They were nothing but lies. “You think that matters now?”
“Yes, it should matter. The fact that she’s yours should matter. Please don’t take her ranch away from her.”
“The ranch is mine. She can have it when I’m dead. Now the two of you get the hell out of my hotel room.” He stormed across the carpet and opened the door.
Chapter Two
A Year and a Half Later
“How many more times”—Maria Bay shook her head—“are we going to have this same damned argument, Jeff? I don’t know what you want me to say anymore. I’ve apologized. I’ve explained. I’ve done the best I can for the last year to make this up to you. Yet you still stay in that tiny house. You won’t even let me cook you dinner.”
Jefferson Bay regarded the beautiful woman who was his sister-in-law and the mother of his only child. Her onyx hair still fell past her shoulders in bouncing waves—just like it always had. Her warm brown eyes gazed up at him with searching innocence—just as they had thirty-three years ago.
He inhaled to clear his mind. Maria was no innocent.
Still, his heart roared at him to grab her and kiss her the way he used to—the way he had when he was a young man in love for the first time.
The only time.
He’d made a sort of nervous peace with his daughter, Angelina. She hadn’t even known he’d existed until a year ago when her father—Jeff’s brother—had passed on. Wayne Bay had died never knowing that his younger brother had fathered his oldest child. Now, Jeff and Angie were building a relationship as father-uncle and daughter. It wasn’t strong yet, by any means. Angie called him Jeff. She said Dad or Uncle Jeff didn’t feel right to her. Understandable. Wayne and Maria hadn’t ever told the kids they had an uncle, let alone that he was Angie’s real father. Nope, Jeff had been a convicted felon serving time. A true skeleton in the closet.
With Angie, Jeff had patience. She and her husband were expecting their first child. Jeff was going to be a grandfather—a pretty daunting concept to a man who’d only been a father for the past year. He was treading carefully with Angie. He was lucky she spoke to him at all after he’d threatened to take her inheritance when Wayne had died. Not one of his finer moments. She was innocent in all this, after all. She wasn’t the one who’d betrayed him and lied to him for three decades.
Nope. That honor went to her mother.
Maria. Not so innocent.
His first and only love still captivated him, though. He couldn’t take his eyes from her when she was near. Even as he worked on the ranch, when she came near he found his gaze drawn to her flowing hair, her curvy body that looked sumptuous in simple jeans and a western shirt. All those years in prison he’d never forgotten her, no matter how hard he tried. He’d taught himself not to think of her during the daylight hours. And even at night, as he fell into slumber on his cot, listening to the muffled sounds of inmates snoring and crying, he’d forced his mind to other things. Much better than imagining what they’d had, or rather, what he’d thought they had.
Or worse yet, imagining her in his brother’s bed.
But sleep… That was a different story. She’d haunted him in his dreams. She stormed in and took possession of him, as if to say, “You can’t shut me out, no matter how hard you try, Jeff. I’m here in your head and your heart. I’m part of your very soul, and I’ll never leave. Never.”
He feared he’d never be free of her. Much as he tried, he couldn’t harden his heart.
And now here she stood, hands on her hips, fire darting from her dark brown eyes.
“I guess you’ll have to tell me how long this will go on, Mia. How long does it take to get over thirty years of lies?”
Her eyes softened back to their warm chocolate. “I don’t understand you, Jeff. Sometimes you’re caring and warm, and I think you’re coming around, and then you go cold again.”
He couldn’t deny her words. The truth was he wanted her back in his life. Back in his bed. But prison had hardened him. He didn’t want to live a life of resentment. He’d been there, done that. The result wasn’t pretty. Yet whenever he moved forward to smile, to take Mia into his arms, to forgive, unwanted images popped into his mind.
Perfect Wayne. Five years Jeff’s senior, Wayne had been the golden boy. The apple of Grandpa Norman’s eye. Jeff had never been able to compare, so he’d gone his own way and taken a path of self-destruction.
Until he’d met his Mia.
God, no. Not my Mia. She hasn’t been my Mia for a very long time.
He’d been ready to change, to have a life with her, until she betrayed him with his own brother.
That he couldn’t get past.
“Are you going to answer me or just stand there?” Mia’s voice rose. “I invited you to dinner, damn it. You’ve been here a year and eaten with me only a handful of times.”
Still he didn’t speak. Didn’t even nod.
“We agreed when I invited you to live here on the ranch that we’d try to rebuild our friendship. I haven’t asked for anything more. But you refuse even that.”
Jeff cleared his throat. “I’m trying, Mia.”
“Really? Could’ve fooled me.” She turned and then glanced back at him over her shoulder. “Dinner will be on the table at seven p.m. Angie and Rafe are in town and would like to see you. I’ve invited Harper and Amber too.”
Angie was coming? He’d known she was coming to town but didn’t realize she was here yet. That was a horse of a different color. He nodded. “I’ll be there. Thank you for the invite.”
He inhaled and willed his body to stop the inner quivering that jumbled his insides whenever Maria was near. And he went back to
work.
* * *
“You have to give him time, Mama,” Harper Bay said. “Think of what he’s lost.”
“I know very well what he’s lost.” Maria filled the coffeepot with water and poured it into the machine. “Do you think I haven’t lived with that myself for the last thirty years? Not a day went by that the guilt didn’t eat me alive.”
“You never showed it. We never knew.”
“Of course I never showed it. I had a husband, children, a family to take care of. You all deserved my best.”
“We got that.”
Harper warmed Maria’s heart. God bless her wonderful son. She had been a good mother, and Wayne had been an incredible father, even though he’d spoiled Angelina rotten. But she was fine now, happily married and expecting. “Thank you, hon.”
“But you had us all those years. You had Angie. All that time, he was rotting in prison. You can’t compare your two lives. It’s apples and oranges. Really, it’s apples and crap, to tell the truth.”
Maria nodded. Her son was right, of course. Even though she and Wayne hadn’t been in love, they’d had a good life. Their children had grown up happy and secure. Jeff, on the other hand, had lived a nightmare in prison.
“I know, Harp. I know.” What more could she say? She was lucky Harper had taken the news—that his sister was his half-sister/half-cousin and that his mother had lied to his father all those years—so well.
If she could erase the pain of Jeff’s past she would, but she couldn’t. They had to move forward. Besides, things couldn’t have worked out any differently. If they had, she wouldn’t have the amazing son standing before her now, or her youngest child, Catie.
“He’s still here,” Harper said. “He could have left, but he hasn’t. And he’s earning his own way. We’ve told him we’d take care of him, give him what should rightfully be his.”
“He’s too proud. He needs to work for his supper.” And work he did. Harper told her daily what a great job he was doing, how he worked harder than any of the other hands. And Lord God, it showed. In the year since he’d been at Cha Cha Ranch, he’d tightened up those muscles and had the body he’d had at twenty-one. He was just as handsome, if not more so, with his wavy dark hair now sprinkled with a little salt.
“That’s a good thing, Mama. There’s a good man inside him. He just needs to get through this. And he will. Look how well he and Angie are doing.”
Maria nodded, thankful. In some small way, Jeff’s presence was easing the pain of Wayne’s passing on Angie. Ironically, Angie had been the closest to Wayne, closer than either of his biological children.
“He’ll be here in an hour for supper. I guess I’d best get busy.”
“What are you making?”
“Beef empanadas.”
Harper laughed. “Any man who can resist your beef empanadas isn’t worth having around.”
* * *
Thirty-Three Years Earlier
“See something you like?”
Jeff broke his gaze on the hot little Latina number and turned to Max, who’d just finished gassing up his bike. The hottie and her friend were across the street in the high school parking lot. “Nope. Just admiring the view. I don’t do high school girls. Jailbait and all.”
“The one with the long hair? I can’t remember her name, but I know she’s eighteen.”
Jeff’s heart lurched. “Yeah? How do you know?”
“That’s my cousin Shelley she’s talking to.”
“Really? So you know her?”
“Nope. Shelley’s mom and my mom don’t talk. Some stupid-ass sisters’ feud. But I met that friend of hers a while back, before the big falling out, and Shelley mentioned that she was exactly a month older than her friend. Shelley turned eighteen almost two months ago, so do the math. She’s grown up damned nice, I’ll say.”
* * *
“He’s bad news, Maria,” Rochelle Harte said. “He’s always in trouble. I heard he held up Moon Liquors last weekend.”
“Heard from whom?” Maria had locked her gaze on the tall biker with dark hair and eyes. His face was beautiful—angelic almost—but in a completely masculine way. God, he screamed man with a capital M.
“Just heard. He’s part of that Rebel Riders gang.”
“Do you know his name?”
“Bay. Jeff Bay.”
“Not the Bays of Bay Crossing Ranch?” Maria’s heart nearly skipped a beat.
“Yup. The one and only. Though from what I hear he’s been disinherited and darn near disowned. Plus he’s too old for you. In his twenties.”
“That’s not too old. I’m legal.”
“Right. What’s he going to want with a high school student?”
“We graduate in two weeks, Shelley. Sheesh.”
“What are you looking around for, anyway? You and Greg are practically engaged.”
“That may be what he thinks, but no, we’re not.” She held up her hand. “Do you see a ring on this finger? I’m not ready to settle down, anyway. College is going to be a blast.”
“Yeah, it is. So what are you making moon eyes over Jeff Bay for? He’s no college man. We’re all going to CU together, including Greg.”
“Yeah.” Try as she might, Maria couldn’t get excited over another four years with Greg Black. He was handsome, and he was smart, and he was captain of the football team…yada yada yada. He was also boring. All they did was make out. He’d tried many times to go further, but she wouldn’t. “I’m holding off until I’m eighteen,” she’d say.
That excuse no longer held water. She’d been eighteen for nearly a month now. Luckily, they were all busy with finals and the impending graduation, and Greg hadn’t been pestering her. But it would happen, and soon.
Truth be told, she didn’t want to lose her virginity to Greg Black. He wasn’t the one. She knew that. She didn’t know how she knew, but she knew.
She was still staring at the gorgeous cowboy on a motorcycle when his dark gaze suddenly met hers. His eyes were laced with hunger. Was he actually melting her clothes off her body?
She gulped. “Oh, God.”
“What?” Shelley said.
Maria didn’t answer. Jeff Bay’s full lips curved into a lazy grin, his gaze never leaving her. Damn, why hadn’t she worn a nicer blouse today? Suddenly her Styx T-shirt felt infantile.
“Earth to Maria.”
Maria shook her head quickly and turned back to Shelley. “Sorry. What did you say?”
“Nothing that matters. Get your head out of the clouds. We’re going to be late for class.”
Class? Heck, they were graduating in two weeks. She had a three point nine grade point average. She’d already been accepted to college. Who needed to go to class?
“Go ahead. I need to run back to the car. Forgot one of my notebooks.”
“Okay.” Shelley shrugged and walked toward the school building.
Slowly, Maria ambled toward her car. All her notebooks were in the backpack around her shoulders, of course, but she’d had to stall. Couldn’t bear to leave just yet.
Shelley was right. Jeff Bay wouldn’t give her the time of day. Sure, he’d look to his heart’s content. Most guys did. She was used to that—the power of long dark hair and large breasts. It had been going on since she was fourteen. But for one more minute—sixty more seconds—she wanted to dream that the gorgeous bad boy on the bike might be hers someday.
Maria fumbled in her car for a few minutes and then walked toward the school, turning her back to the gorgeous biker.
God, what an idiot I am. He is so not my type.
The slow thundering of a motorcycle engine revved up behind her, and she gulped and turned her head. Next to her, mounted on his bike, was her dream man.
He turned to her, his eyes blazing.
“Hop on.”
Maria didn’t think. She just hopped on, happy to obey his command. No helmet, no leather jacket—she had no protective gear at all except the pack full of books on her back.
>
And she didn’t care one bit.
Jeff rode slowly through the high school parking lot and out onto the street, and then he gunned it onto the highway.
Freedom. Exhilaration. Maria had never felt anything like it. The wind tossed her hair about, sure to make it a rat’s nest to comb out later, but she didn’t care. Her eyelashes blew against her eyelids. If only she could reach into her backpack for her sunglasses.
Oh, well, next time.
Would there be a next time?
Yes. She’d make sure of it. She hadn’t had her last taste of a Harley.
Or of Jeff Bay, she hoped.
They screamed down the highway toward the countryside. She had no idea where they were going, and while that fact normally would have bothered her, it didn’t at this moment. All that mattered was the vibrating seat between her thighs and the strong, hard back of the man in front of her. She wanted to ride like the wind.
For a half hour they rode, until he finally got off the highway, trekked down a county road, and stopped at a little mom-and-pop shop on the corner.
He helped her off the bike and met her gaze. “Hey,” he said.
“Hey.”
“You want something to drink?”
She swallowed. Yeah, she was parched. Plus this gave her a chance to dig for her sunglasses so her eyelids wouldn’t turn inside out again. She nodded.
“Coke?” He grinned. “Diet coke?”
“Just water, actually. I can give you some money.”
“Nah, it’s on me. No worries.” He ambled into the shop.
Maria followed him and headed toward the ladies’ room. When she looked in the mirror, she nearly had a coronary. Her hair was a mass of tangles and waves. She dug into her backpack for her brush and tugged it through her hair until the last snarl was gone. Then she laughed out loud. It would just happen again when she went back on the bike.
And she had every intention of getting back on that bike.
She took a moment to look at her reflection. Her cheeks were pink. Damn, they were glowing. And her lips were ruby red. Riding a motorcycle agreed with her.
