“My single-minded goal my whole career has been—”
“To be a top level field agent with the CID of the FBI,” Rhett cut her off. “Yeah, I know that. You didn’t just want to go into the FBI with only the training they provide at the academy. You wanted more knowledge and experience under your belt. You got your degree, signed on at the New Orleans PD, and worked your way up in the homicide division before you applied to the bureau.”
“And it worked. Having that experience and knowledge put me on the fast track the way I’d hoped it would.”
Rhett snorted and tipped his mug toward her before taking a swig. “I’ll say. From what I hear about this Cooper guy, you’ve landed yourself on one of the toughest teams in the bureau.”
She held up a finger. “When I catch this killer, I will have landed myself on Cooper’s A-team. This case is a test. I don’t doubt that.”
“When you catch this killer. That’s the kind of confidence that’s gotten you where you are.”
She nodded. “It is. Confidence in myself about my career is something I’ve never lacked.”
“Yet, that doesn’t answer my question.” Rhett wasn’t going to let her take the subject on a permanent detour. “You weren’t supposed to leave for Quantico for another week, but you up and disappeared while Drake and I were on shift at the department without telling us.”
Her gaze dropped to the table and her shoulders rose and fell in a heavy breath. “I couldn’t. I had to do it that way, no matter how badly it pissed you off.”
It had done a lot more than piss them off. It had hurt them, far deeper than she apparently realized. “You obviously convinced yourself of that. Now, why don’t you try to convince me?”
Her gaze lifted, but it didn’t meet his. Instead, she reached for the extra shot of whisky before glancing at him. “Do you mind?”
“Be my guest.” If she needed a little more liquid courage to spill her guts, more power to her.
She took the shot, let the whisky linger in her mouth, and then swallowed. It took another full minute before she finally met his gaze and started to talk. “You and Drake were intent on convincing me to stay. It didn’t matter what I said or did, the night I told the two of you I had been accepted into the academy and would be leaving for Quantico, it suddenly became your sole mission to make sure it didn’t happen.”
“Can you blame us for not wanting to lose you?”
“I blamed you and Drake for not giving me the space I needed to make an informed decision.”
“Your mind was set, Alex. From the second you got that acceptance letter to the academy, it didn’t matter what we said or did. You were already planning to go.”
“I didn’t make that a secret either.”
“No, you didn’t, but there were other options besides running away.”
“I didn’t—” She slammed her lips closed when Rhett lifted a brow, already knowing what she’d been about to say. “All right,” she relented with a heavy sigh. “I did run, both because a part of me wanted to stay with you and Drake and because I knew those other options you’re talking about would’ve never worked.”
“We didn’t expect you to give up your dreams for us, Alex. We were willing to wait for you.”
“Right. The two of you were going to wait for me to get through the academy and then what? I didn’t get assigned to the New Orleans branch. I was sent straight to Waterston after I graduated the academy. Mississippi might be a whole lot closer to Louisiana than Virginia, but it’s still hundreds of miles away.”
“They have police precincts in Waterston. Drake and I could’ve easily put in for transfers.”
“Drake was still living with his parents because he refused to leave Christy alone in that house. Damn near everyone in your family lives in New Orleans and half the men are on that precinct. Your lives were in New Orleans. I wasn’t going to ask the two of you to give up all of that for me even if I thought our relationship would last.”
“Are you saying you thought what the three of us had was a fling?”
She briefly closed her eyes and he could tell she was reigning in her temper. “I don’t know any more now than I did then exactly what I thought the three of us had. What I did know was if word got out about me having two boyfriends, two lovers who shared me, it would’ve been career suicide, even in New Orleans.”
Rhett waited several beats before commenting on that. He pointedly looked around at the crowded tables beneath the thatch covered roof of Ménage à Drink. Nearly every one of them was occupied by triads, most of them two men and one woman. “The sunset, the sandy beach, the aura of paradise that seems to form a globe over this place…” He fixed his attention on Alex. “Those aren’t the truly beautiful things about this island. It’s the fact that people live how they choose to live, they love who they choose to love, and no one ridicules them or shuns them for their choice.”
“On this island,” she said slowly, putting heavy emphasis on each word. “The rest of the United States isn’t this way, Rhett. You and Drake didn’t see that any more then than you obviously do now. If the world were a different place…”
Rhett waited for her to complete the sentence, but she shook her head and averted her gaze instead. “Would you have stayed with us then?”
“The answer to that is moot. The world isn’t a different place any more now than it was then.”
“All right. How about the answer to this question? Are you happy, Alex?” He’d been ready and willing to spend the rest of his life with her. Hell, he couldn’t deny he still was. But the only thing that had ever truly mattered to him was her happiness.
“Of course.”
Her answer came far too quickly and abruptly for him to truly believe her.
* * * *
The strange way Rhett was staring at her compelled Alex to elaborate. “I’ve followed my dreams. I’ve accomplished every goal I’ve set for myself and am in the process of achieving yet another one. Being an FBI agent is challenging and rewarding and even more fulfilling than I’d expected.”
It was all true, and yet the words left a bitter taste in her mouth. Damn it, she’d known having a drink with him would be a bad idea. Barely a half an hour alone with him and her heart was already second-guessing everything in her life.
A hint of the boyish smile that had never stopped haunting her fantasies toyed on his lips. “Good. I’m happy for you.”
She flattened her hands on the table. “I think I’m done here. If you’ll point me in the direction of my cottage…”
Rhett was on his feet before she finished the sentence. “I’ll walk you there. We’ll take the beach route.” He rounded the table as she got to her feet and flattened a hand on the small of her back when she turned.
She stiffened at the simple touch as electric sparks rained through her body. She quickened her step as they walked away from the table, hoping to move far enough in front of him that his hand would fall away. She didn’t know why she thought it would work, given his longer legs that enabled him to easily keep up with her.
She gave up, stopped at the edge of the floor, and shot him a look. “Don’t you need to pay the tab?”
“I’ll settle up with Cerridwen tomorrow. She knows I’m not going anywhere.”
Alex pursed her lips. “It’s kind of like a small town, only it’s located on an island instead of the outskirts of a state, isn’t it?”
Rhett grinned at her as he used his hand on the small of her back to steer her toward the beach. “It’s exactly like that, though we get a lot more tourists than the average small town.”
She turned, pointing behind her as she glanced over her shoulder. “Shouldn’t we be going that way?”
“This way will get us there, too.”
“But I’ll need to know how to get to my cottage from the street.”
Rhett stopped at the edge of the deck surrounding the outside of Ménage à Drink, toed off his shoes, and bent to hook them on his fingers. “When you
walk out the front door of the cottage, take a right and follow the road to the main drag. That’s the street with the Sheriff’s Department. You’ll know where you’re at when you get that far.” His fingertips danced over the small of her back as he stretched his arm around her waist and shot a pointed glance at her feet. “You might want to step out of those heels before we hit the sand.”
She turned in his embrace and splayed a hand on his chest. The feel of his muscles flexing beneath her palm stole her train of thought. A soft, involuntary gasp escaped her lips as she tipped her head back to find him gazing down at her with enough heated promises in his eyes to burn her soul.
“Rhett…” she started, but couldn’t straighten her thoughts with all the sensations clamoring through her mind and body enough to figure out what else she’d intended to say.
“Alex?” His rough-edged tone was equal parts questioning and casual, as if it hadn’t been five years since he’d been this close to her, since he’d held her and gazed into her eyes this way.
Somehow, despite the chaotic mess being with him again was creating in her system, she managed to find her resolve. “We’re not going for a romantic stroll down the beach beneath a star-filled sky.”
“Sure sounds romantic to me when you say it like that. But, no,” he continued when she started to speak, “I’m walking you home and using that time to show you a different part of the island.”
He’d gotten slick. She hesitated another heartbeat, watching the mischief twinkling in his eyes, before she turned and stepped out of her heels. She hooked them on her fingers the way he’d done with his shoes and walked down the steps that took her to the sand. He settled in next to her, shortening his strides to fall into step with hers, his arms hanging loose at his sides.
It felt surreal walking beside him again, feeling the heat radiating from his body, and listening to the soft sounds of his breathing as they got farther and farther away from the noise of the bar. The bizarreness intensified when he laced his fingers with hers a few minutes later. She tried to pull her hand from his, but he tightened his grip.
“Humor me.”
“I thought I was by letting you lure me to the beach.”
He chuckled softly. “Then continue to humor me. So, I guess the whole MIB thing is true in the bureau, huh?”
She gave up trying to get him to release her hand and shot him a puzzle look. “MIB thing?”
“You know, dark suits, ties, and spit-shined shoes.”
“Don’t you have a cousin in the FBI?”
“Ronnie. He’s assigned to the Wisconsin branch. It’s been several years since I’ve seen him face to face, but we chat on Facebook a lot and every picture he posts of himself has him wearing a black suit and tie. He’s even got the super dark black shades to go with it.”
Alex giggled. “Not every agent dresses that way. Some assignments demand we wear different attire. I choose to wear neutral colored skirt or pants suits because they’re both professional and approachable.”
“Have you been approached a lot?”
She glanced at him again. He might have made the question sound as if he were merely carrying on their casual conversation, but she knew there was far more to it than that. “I’m not seeing anyone, if that’s what you’re asking.”
As soon as she said the words, she wished she could take them back. She should’ve lied. She should’ve made up a boyfriend, told him she’d been with the guy for more than a year, and they were talking about getting married.
“Drake and I aren’t either.”
“You still date women together?” She briefly bowed her head and closed her eyes as, once again, more words spilled from her mouth that she knew she shouldn’t say. She didn’t want to know what he and Drake did with other women. It wasn’t any of her business. She’d walked away from them, she had been the one to let them go, and she knew she didn’t have a single right to feel the jealousy churning in her belly at the thought of them with someone else.
Rhett lifted a shoulder. “Now and then. We’ve tried it both ways since you left. He’s had women, I’ve had women, and a couple of times we’ve shared the same woman.” He brought them to a slow stop and turned to face her. “There hasn’t been anyone serious for either of us since you.”
Unable to meet his gaze, she looked past him at a cottage behind him. “Is that where I’m staying while I’m here?”
He stared at her for so long she didn’t think he intended to answer. Finally, he nodded, turned again, and started walking up a narrow passage that led between the cottage and another next to it. He didn’t say anything more until they were standing outside the front door.
“Drake and I have a place on the opposite side of the street about five cottages down. It’s the one with the red Bronco and the midnight-blue Ram parked in the driveway.”
“I noticed most of the islanders at least seem to own cars, but there are very few on the streets.”
“Most everyone prefers to walk wherever they have to go. It keeps traffic down and most everything is close enough that it makes getting into a car pointless. Those who don’t care to walk so much are more likely to use a golf cart than a car.”
She shook her head. “I can’t decide if this island is charming or weird.”
He chuckled, reached around her, and opened the front door of the cottage.
She gaped at him, realizing he hadn’t needed a key to get inside. “I guess Kenneth Winters forgot to lockup after he dropped off my luggage.”
“No one locks doors on the island.”
“Okay, that settles it. This island is definitely weird.”
“Not weird. Just trusting.” He winced. “Sometimes to a fault. Even after the trouble we’ve had that’s made it to the island, the residents still don’t bother with locking doors or installing security or taking any of the other normal safety precautions people do on the mainland.”
“I suppose you could see that as them having confidence in their island Sheriff’s Department to keep them safe.”
“Would it make you feel better if I made a pass through the cottage before you go inside?”
Alex slanted him a disbelieving look. “I’m an FBI agent, Rhett. If I can’t protect myself by now, then I need to hand over my badge.”
He smiled down at her. “Yeah, I guess so.”
“Thanks for the drinks. I’d like to reconvene in the conference room first thing in the morning.” She hesitated and then added, “Maybe you could relay that message to Drake when you get home.”
Rhett slowly nodded. “I’ll tell him.”
“Thanks.” She gave him a smile and started to back step to the door, but his fingers were still locked with hers and he wouldn’t let go. Instead, he took a half step forward. “Rhett, are you going to—” let go of my hand so I can go inside, she started to ask, but before she could finish the sentence, he’d closed the distance between them.
The hard wall of his chest nudged her front and she stumbled through the doorway into the cottage. He followed her inside, kicking the door closed as he used his continued hold on her hand to spin her around and pin her to the wall.
Memories of a long ago night when she’d opened her apartment door in New Orleans and found herself pulled inside, whirled around, and pressed against the wall by Drake assailed her. That had been the first night Drake and Rhett had shared her, the night she’d discovered they had fallen in love with her, and the night she’d already known she would have to let both of them go forever.
Too stunned by Rhett’s sudden assertiveness to think, let alone move, she stood frozen between him and the wall as he crushed his mouth to hers. He gentled the kiss almost instantly, licking his way between her slightly parted lips in the slow, tender glide she remembered all too well. Dear God, it had been so long. She felt herself start to melt and felt her free arm move on its own accord as it lifted and wound its way around his neck.
Then he was kissing her deeper, angling his head as his tongue swept into her
mouth to tangle with hers. He finally let go of her other hand in favor of putting both of his on her hips. Warning bells sounded loudly enough to disturb the whole island if they hadn’t been only in her head. She needed to stop him. She had to get away from him. She wanted him as much now as she ever had.
His hands skimmed down her outer thighs as he licked his way out of her mouth across her cheek and to her ear. He bunched the material of her skirt in his fists, pulling it up and dipping his hands beneath it as he licked her earlobe between his lips for a tender nip.
She tunneled her fingers in the back of his hair, leaning into his kisses as he nuzzled his face in the side of her neck and licked her there, too. The heat of his palms scorched her outer thighs as they glided up and down her bare flesh. His tongue continued to travel, following the line of her collarbone, dipping into the hollow of her throat, and trailing down her chest through the V created by the neckline of her shirt.
Her head fell back, smacked the wall behind her, and she squeezed her eyes shut, realizing only then that they’d filled with tears. She couldn’t let this happen no matter how desperately she needed him.
“Rhett.” His name sounded strangled and pleading even to her own ears.
“I want to taste you, Alex.” The warmth of his breath fanned the fine hairs on her chest just above the valley of her breasts. “Please don’t stop me until I’ve tasted you.”
The pain splitting through his desire-filled voice tore at her heart. Letting him continue would only make it worse on both of them. This wasn’t five years ago. So much had changed. They were different people living different lives in different places. Those lives would go back to what they’d been yesterday just as soon as they caught their killer.
That thought sliced at her heart as much as the hurt she’d heard in his voice, but thinking this could end any other way would only lead to the second biggest disaster of her life. The first being when she’d forced herself to walk away from him and Drake the first time.
Safe and Deputized with Ecstasy [The Heroes of Silver Island 4] (Siren Publishing Ménage Everlasting) Page 8
