by June Tate
‘Pretty soon, I guess. In one way I just want to get it over with, in another I dread the idea.’
‘Know what you mean. Southampton isn’t a bad place. The folks have treated us well.’ He grinned broadly. ‘I’ll sure miss seeing Cora, I guess you will too?’
Hank’s eyes narrowed. ‘You seen much of her then?’
The soldier laughed. ‘Every damned inch of her! Great body. For a whore, she’s a great girl.’ He rose from the bench. ‘Gotta go. See you!’
Hank was in shock, unable to move. Cora, a whore? Not his Cora. The girl who had kept him at arm’s length all the time he’d been seeing her. It couldn’t be true … could it? He felt sick to his stomach.
Hank didn’t have much time to dwell on his predicament over the next few days as the exercises continued. Fake battle lines were drawn and, as he walked behind a tank, slowly driving over the terrain to meet the supposed enemy, the realisation of what really lay ahead became apparent to all and sundry. It was a wake-up call. One that focused the mind and when the men piled into trucks to take them back to camp, they were a silent bunch as opposed to the air of jollity that had been uppermost on the outward journey.
They gathered ready to wash mud-packed uniforms and shower the dirt from their aching bodies after attending a debriefing with senior officers; they went over the results of the exercise then told the troop to get a good night’s sleep because tomorrow they’d be off again.
There was a murmur of disappointment from the troops who had been hoping for a rest and a pass into town.
The officer glared at them. ‘We’re about to fight a war and you need to be ready or you won’t be around to enjoy the pleasures of the flesh with anyone. Dismiss!’
Jackson Butler was on exercises in a different location. Crawling over rain-soaked ground, hiding from the other troops who were supposed to be the enemy. He jumped into a dugout only to find it was several inches under water which came up to his ankles and flooded his boots.
‘Holy shit!’ he exclaimed and yelled as another of his company threw himself into the hole, landing on top of him.
His comrade apologised as he untangled himself. ‘Sorry, Jackson! Jesus Christ! This ain’t no fun at all. I’m so fucking angry that if one of them Krauts came up here now I’d kill the bastard with my bare hands, I swear I would!’
Looking at the mud-spattered man beside him, Jackson started to laugh. ‘You should just see yourself, man. You’re covered from head to foot in mud. Hell, I doubt either of us will ever be clean again! Here …’ he handed him a cigarette from a pack. ‘I think we both deserve a smoke.’
At that moment, one of his officers appeared looking down on the two of them.
‘What the hell are you playing at? This is not a fucking tea party, we’re supposed to be fighting a war! Get up off your black arses and follow me.’
Jackson and his comrade dumped their cigarettes and, muttering beneath their breaths, clambered out of the dugout, ducking and diving at the sound of gun fire. Several hours later, they climbed wearily into trucks and were driven back to camp where, after a shower and hot meal, they tumbled into their bunks, ready for sleep.
One of the men was heard to say, ‘If the damned Krauts don’t kill us, I reckon we’ll die of exhaustion!’
Jackson curled up under the covers and thought of Belle. He wished she were here with him, he longed to feel her warm flesh against his and her arms around him.
Belle was working, entertaining a Canadian firefighter, smiling, making him comfortable, seeing to his needs, her mind miles away – thinking of Jackson Butler.
Chapter Five
A week later, Cora was sitting quietly in the Lord Roberts sipping her half pint of bitter, when the door opened and Hank walked in. She, delighted to see him, waved and smiled, but he just nodded, walked to the bar and ordered a drink before wandering over to her and sitting down.
‘Hank! How lovely to see you. How did the exercises go?’
‘They were hell, really. We were soaked to the skin, cold and miserable, to be honest. We were all glad when they were over and we could sit in a hot bath and eat a decent meal.’
She was immediately sympathetic. ‘How awful, but I guess it was essential in preparation for the real thing.’
‘Yes, of course, we all realise that.’ He took a good swig of his beer. ‘So now, what I really want is to have sex with a woman until I’m exhausted – are you free?’
Cora was so shocked she was speechless for a moment. Hank had never spoken to her in such derogatory tone, but now she knew he’d discovered her secret. She sat up straight and glared at him.
‘I never ever thought of you as being a callous person. You surprise me!’
He raised his eyebrows. ‘I surprise you! How do you think I felt when one of my buddies told me what you do for a living? Yet you have never ever let me get near you! How do you think I felt?’
‘I didn’t exactly lie,’ she said quietly, ‘I just didn’t go into detail, but don’t you understand? You were different. I didn’t want you as a punter, with you I wanted to be me – as a person, just an ordinary girl, a girl you liked – as I liked you.’
There was a certain vulnerability in her voice which Hank recognised and which quelled his anger somewhat. ‘Why do you do it, for Christ’s sake?’
‘Because I want a future! I have nothing. No one. I have to fend for myself and to do that I need money, money that will take me to London when I have enough. Enough to put all this behind me, to allow me to start a fresh life where no one knows me or anything about me. Can’t you understand?’ Cora was now the one who was angry.
Hank was at a loss for words. What she told him made sense, but he couldn’t get rid of the images of this lovely girl in bed with other men. It was driving him crazy because to him, she was special.
He shook his head. ‘I thought you were my girl. How wrong can a guy be?’
Cora fought the tears which threatened to come and rose from her seat.
‘I’m really sorry, Hank, but that’s who I am – and that’s what I do.’ She walked out of the bar, tears slowly trickling down her cheeks. She took a few steps along the street, then broke down and sobbed until there were no tears left to shed.
Inside the bar, Hank walked up to the counter. ‘Have you got anything stronger than beer, landlord?’
Leaning closer so as not to be heard, the landlord said, ‘I have some bourbon under the counter, Yank.’
‘Fine, make it a large one, will you? And keep them coming!’
Belle locked her front door and started to make her way to the Horse and Groom when, in the dusk of the evening, she saw Cora leaning against the wall near the Lord Roberts. She was clearly in distress.
‘Cora, whatever’s the matter, love?’
‘My lovely GI has found out that I’m on the game! Oh, Belle, I’m so miserable.’
Seeing the state of her friend, Belle took her by the arm and back to her room where she poured them both a stiff measure of gin and added some tonic.
‘Here, love, drink this. I’ll join you. Oh, Cora, life really is a bitch!’
‘It was bound to happen. We met one of my punters one night and he was in the same company as Hank. It was only a matter of time.’
Belle nodded. ‘He didn’t like it, of course. That’s understandable.’
‘I never let him near me except for a few kisses and cuddles and then just now, he asked me if I was free tonight as he wanted a woman. That really hurt.’
‘Of course it did, but you can understand him. He must have had a hell of a shock when he found out. How did you leave him?’
‘I told him that’s what I did and walked out of the bar. So that’s the end of a beautiful friendship.’
Belle, knowing of Cora’s future plans, tried to cheer her.
‘You listen to me! Pretty soon all these boys will be off to fight a war. They’ll have other things on their mind and those lucky devils who survive will go home to their familie
s. We won’t even be remembered but you, you’ll be off to London starting all over again. A new woman. You think about that instead, my love!’
‘You’re right, of course, it’s just that I wanted a proper relationship, a real one, one that wasn’t business. Hank treated me like a young innocent woman, not a brass, because deep down, I don’t feel like one. Every time I take a man to my bed, I just think it’s another step towards a better life.’ She let out a deep sigh. ‘I really can’t work tonight, but I just don’t want to be on my own.’ She looked at Belle for support.
‘Right. I’ll take the night off too. You can bunk in with me. Oh, fuck it, let’s just get plastered and I’ll tell you how I came to be working the streets.’
It was quite a story.
Belle began. ‘My parents were devoted churchgoers; I’m not surprised that comes as a shock to you,’ she said, seeing the expression on her friend’s face. ‘I was dragged to church twice a day on Sundays, whether I liked it or not. The only thing that made it bearable was the young vicar, who happened to be good-looking. I’d sit and stare at him throughout the service. Then one day as we were leaving, shaking hands with him outside, he suggested I might like to join the choir.’
‘Well, you still have a great voice,’ Cora chipped in having heard Belle sing many times in the Horse and Groom when the pianist played and everybody joined in.
‘As you can imagine, I jumped at the chance and my parents were thrilled at the prospect. But what they didn’t know was that very soon, the young vicar would make excuses for me to stay behind after the others left. At first he gave the reason that it was to help him put the music sheets away and tidy up, but deep down I knew differently.’
‘What happened?’
‘Nothing to begin with. He’d hold my hand just a little bit too long as he thanked me for helping, then he’d put his arm round my shoulder as he walked me to the door, then one evening he asked me back to the rectory to give me a copy of a new hymn we were to learn, made me a cup of tea and sat next to me on the sofa.’
‘And?’
Belle shrugged. ‘Well, one thing led to another and I left him no longer a virgin and – as I thought – madly in love.’
‘Oh, Belle, that was so wrong of him! He used his position to seduce you.’
‘But don’t you see, I didn’t care. We had an affair for several months until one evening his bishop called unexpectedly and saw us through the window.’
‘Oh my God! What happened?’
‘He was moved to another diocese and my parents were informed.’
‘You weren’t pregnant, were you?’
‘Oh no, he wasn’t entirely stupid, he took precautions, but my parents disowned me and kicked me out of the house.’
‘How old were you?’
‘Seventeen. I was working and rented a room near Canal Walk because it was the cheapest and the only one I could afford. One evening, I saw the girls working and got talking to one, found out I could earn more money as a brass and so I changed jobs.’
‘But you once told me you were married.’
Belle gave a wry smile. ‘Yes, another bad move. I met this man, managed to keep from him as to how I earned a living – I said I worked in a shop – and indeed, after a while, I left the streets and got such a job in a general store. We married and it was fine for a couple of years until he found out about my past and wanted me to go back on the streets because I could earn more money that way … that’s when I kicked him out.’
‘But you returned to doing tricks.’
‘I did and made more money – but it was all mine. I’ve been doing it ever since. Like you, Cora, I’m saving, but for my retirement. I want a little bungalow with a small garden. I might even have a cat. Maybe open a B & B. I don’t want to live with a man again. Sod that! And as for sex, well love, I’ve had enough of that to last two lifetimes.’ She doubled up laughing until her stomach ached, then poured another drink.
But as she lay in bed that night, she silently admitted to herself that the things she’d told Cora about living alone were not strictly true. She was lonely. Yes, she had friends, but what she really wanted was to find a man who truly loved her, whom she could love back. A man to care for her – care about her. Someone she could lean on for a change. A man with whom she could sit quietly in the evenings, his arm around her shoulders, listening to the wireless.
She turned over with a deep sigh and shut her eyes, telling herself everyone had to have a dream or life would be unbearable. At least she’d have a bungalow to look forward to and that was more than most people aspired to.
Chapter Six
In the following weeks, life continued in Southampton. More troops were moved into camps around the town and every evening people listened avidly to the news, relieved to hear that Allied troops had taken Monte Cassino. It seemed that the Germans were now on the run. Newsreels in the cinemas were full of pictures of this success and Winston Churchill with his V-sign and famous cigar did much to cheer the population.
Life on Southampton’s streets didn’t change. The black market thrived, queues for food seemed to get longer, women spent time in the shops set up by the WVS, swapping and buying second-hand clothes – and the National loaf remained as unpalatable as ever.
The GIs who frequented the local pubs in The Ditches were generous enough with small food items, which they bought in their PX stores, and the children could be heard asking, ‘Any gum chum?’ whenever they saw an American uniform. Yet beneath this was the expectation and fear of the invasion.
Cora hadn’t seen anything of Hank, which didn’t surprise her but still made her sad. However, as the days passed and her nights were busy, she put the experience behind her until one evening, he walked into the Lord Roberts. Her breath caught in her throat as she watched him.
He walked straight up to the bar and ordered a drink, then picking up his glass he walked over to her and sat down.
Cora was sitting in silence and looked at him, wondering what he was going to say.
‘Hello Cora. How are you?’ he asked quietly.
‘I’m fine, thanks. I’m very surprised to see you in here,’ she said.
He stared at her. ‘To be honest, I’m surprised too. But I can’t get you out of my mind and it’s driving me crazy!’
Her heart seemed to miss a beat. ‘I didn’t think you wanted to see me ever again after the last time,’ she said.
‘To be frank, I hate what you do. I hate every man you’ve taken to your bed, but I couldn’t keep away any longer.’
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ she asked nervously.
‘I guess I still want you to be my girl.’
She was stunned. ‘Hank, how can that be when you know the business I’m in?’
‘Well, I’ve given a lot of thought to what you said, how you felt about …’ he was at a loss for a moment, ‘your business. That it’s a way to earn money to give you a future, so I’m hoping that these men don’t mean anything to you.’
‘But of course they don’t! How could they?’
‘In that case, will you be my girl again?’
She frowned. ‘Can you live with what I do and still want me? Won’t that come between us?’
He leant forward. ‘Look, Cora. Pretty soon we’ll be shipped across the Channel and I’m not sure just how long we’d have together, so let’s just enjoy what time we have. No recriminations. What do you say?’
A smile crept slowly across her features. ‘I’d like that, Hank. I’ve really missed you.’
‘You have?’ He looked pleased.
‘Yes, why are you surprised?’
‘I guess after our last meeting and, I admit I was unkind, I thought you wouldn’t want anything more to do with me.’
She placed a finger over his lips. ‘That was then, this is now. We won’t ever mention it again. From here on in, I’m your girl. Right?’
He leant forward and kissed her. ‘Right! Can I take you out for a drink to celebrate?
’
‘I can’t think of anything I’d rather do.’
During the evening, Hank asked her about the night she lost her parents and her home and, as he listened, he could see how she’d suffered and began to understand how hard it had been for her to survive such a trauma.
‘The Germans came over every night about the same time. We used to hear the sirens go and we knew we were in for another bad night. Mum used to make a flask of tea in case it went on for a long time. We didn’t have a shelter so we used to crawl under the dining room table. We had blankets and pillows there to make us comfortable.’ She took a sip of her drink. ‘At first you’d hear the sound of the guns, then the planes and the whine of the bomb – then silence. That was the worst part because soon after the silence you’d hear an explosion. On this particular night it seemed worse than ever. There were more bombs exploding than before and they seemed to be getting nearer than ever. Every time we’d cling on to each other, wondering if it would be us next … and then it was.’
Hank caught her by the hand. ‘Don’t go on, honey, if it upsets you,’ he said.
‘No, I want you to know, then perhaps you’ll understand.’ She took a deep breath and continued.
‘We heard the bomb. Then the silence and suddenly all hell broke loose it seemed. The ceiling caved in on top of us, there was dust everywhere, the table collapsed, then I don’t remember anything until the air raid wardens and the firemen started to dig us out. All I remember was a strange voice saying, “Come along, miss, wake up, there’s a good girl”.’
‘Oh, Cora, honey, I had no idea.’ Hank’s voice was full of sympathy.
Tears welled in her eyes as she said, ‘They managed to pull me free and into an ambulance, but when I asked about my parents, the men went quiet – and then I knew.’
Hank called the barman over and asked for two brandies. When they arrived, he made her drink some. ‘Here, this’ll do you good.’ He watched her closely as she did so. Then he asked for the bill.
