“I missed you so much,” he said to the woman in his dream.
“I missed you too,” she whispered. “Go back to sleep.”
He let out a long breath.
KENDALL OPENED HER eyes the next morning to Drew having a murmured conference with a tall, dark-haired nurse. He still clasped Kendall’s hand.
“I’d like some breakfast, but first, I think I need to visit the men’s room,” he said to the nurse.
“You’ll need some assistance for that.”
“Are you sure?” he said. “Will I be able to take a shower today?”
“I don’t think you’re going to be able to get those stylish boxer briefs off by yourself right now, Mr. McCoy,” she teased.
“Normally I’d think that was a great thing,” he muttered. The nurse burst out laughing.
“How about a sponge bath after your trip to the men’s room?” she coaxed. “The doc was nice enough to use some waterproof sutures in your shoulder, so we’ll try a shower tomorrow morning before you leave.”
“My hair—”
“I have some lovely dry shampoo with your name on it.” The nurse glanced over at Kendall and grinned. “Good morning. And you are?”
Kendall shoved her hair out of her eyes. “I’m Kendall.”
“I’m guessing you two know each other.”
“You could say that,” Kendall said.
She probably looked like hell. The hospital was probably used to seeing people in less than magazine cover model condition, but she didn’t want Drew to scream and run when he glanced over at her.
“We don’t usually let visitors bunk with the patients, but I’ll overlook it.” The nurse stuck out her hand. “I’m Cheryl. I’m about to go off-duty, but I’ll be back at eleven tonight. I’ll take Drew to the men’s room, and the day nurse will be here to help him with the rest of the items on his to-do list.”
Kendall shook her hand. “Is there coffee anywhere?”
“There’s an espresso cart in the waiting area,” Cheryl said.
“God bless you,” Kendall said and shoved herself off Drew’s bed. “I’ll be right back.”
She hurried into the bathroom. By the time she emerged, Drew was slowly making his way across the hospital room. His legs weren’t the problem. His heavily-bandaged shoulder was affecting his balance. Kendall was fairly sure the pain meds were creating an issue as well. Cheryl, the nurse, was leading him toward the bathroom.
“Take it easy, Drew. We’re almost there.”
Drew glanced over at Kendall. “Good morning.”
“Good morning,” she said. “Want me to get you a coffee?”
She saw his lips curve into a smile. “Hell, yeah. Tall latte, please.”
Drew was sitting up in the reclining chair when she walked back into his room, and he was eating what looked like breakfast for five. “I’m a little hungry,” he explained.
She put his to-go cup on the rolling table in front of him and pulled a folding chair closer to him. “It looks good.” She peeled the wrapper off of some kind of protein breakfast bar she had bought from the barista.
“Want some?” he said. He pushed the tray closer to her while he unearthed another fork from under a second plate.
She held out the protein bar. “Want to share?”
“Sure.”
Drew smiled at her. He offered to share his food, but he seemed somewhat preoccupied. Maybe he was just in pain and still tired. He seemed happier to see Cheryl than he had been to see her, though, and the first gnawing tendrils of worry started in her gut. She cut the protein bar in half with a plastic knife and handed it to him.
“Isn’t blueberry your favorite?”
“Fruit is good,” he said. He didn’t meet her eyes. He nudged a plateful of scrambled eggs and turkey bacon in her direction. “Have some.”
She took a bite of food that tasted like sawdust in her mouth, chewed, swallowed, and said, “What’s wrong, Drew?”
“What do you mean?” He took another bite of fresh fruit salad. He still wasn’t looking at her.
“We’re talking past each other. We’re not talking to each other.” She hauled in a breath. “Are you mad at me?”
He put his utensils down and sat back in the chair. “Why would I be mad at you?”
He looked into her face, but he wasn’t smiling. If she had to give his expression a name, it would be “wary.” He wasn’t committing himself or his feelings to this conversation. He might have been holding her hand when she woke up this morning, but he wasn’t extending himself in any way, shape, or form.
She stared at him for a moment. “Maybe you could tell me how you feel instead of answering a question with a question.”
He took a sip of coffee and set the to-go cup back down on the table. “Truthfully, I’m hurt.”
“I know I wasn’t there when you woke up yesterday—”
“No, you weren’t. You didn’t call. I thought it wasn’t important to you.”
“Your mom called me yesterday with your phone. Did she tell you I was in the middle of a gigantic firefight?”
“She said you had an emergency you needed to take care of.”
Kendall sucked in a breath. “I did. I cut Rocky Hill yesterday after he beat the hell out of his girlfriend in Las Vegas in front of several hundred witnesses. I had to do a press conference, among other things. I also fired one of the front office staff for defying me when I said I didn’t want him to bail Hill out of jail. I didn’t leave the office until eleven o’clock last night.” She pushed the eggs around on her plate. “I was at the airport to fly out yesterday morning, Sydney called me, and I had to turn around and go back. Didn’t you see what happened on the news?”
“The TV in here is broken. The hospital said they’d either replace it or fix it today. ESPN wasn’t high on my list right then.” He folded his arms in front of him, or at least tried to. She stared at him.
“You have to know that I did my best to get here,” she said. “The Miners’ owner was nice enough to let me use his plane so I could be here late last night, or actually, early this morning. I left as soon as I could and I didn’t do this to hurt you.” She hauled in a breath. “You are very important to me.”
He gave her a nod. They sat in silence for a minute or so. He glanced away from her and swallowed hard.
“Drew, what’s the real reason for this?”
“I don’t understand what you’re talking about.”
“I know you’re hurt because I wasn’t here when you woke up, but there’s something more to this.”
He folded his lips, gave up attempting to cross his arms, and folded his hands in his lap. “Are you staying with the Miners?”
“I wasn’t going to until late yesterday afternoon,” she said.
“What happened then?”
“I had a long talk with the owner. He officially offered me the GM job. He is happy with what I am doing with the organization and the team, and he’d like to have things settled in the next several days. His attorneys have notified him to expect an indictment.” She swallowed. “I’m not sure if he will give the team ownership outright to his wife before the paperwork arrives or what is going to happen, but the franchise will need to batten down the hatches to survive, so to speak.”
“Where does that leave us?”
She looked into his face. “I will have to live in California for the foreseeable future, if that answers your question.”
“If we want to stay together, I’ll be living alone in Seattle six months a year.”
“Drew, we haven’t been on a real date yet. Maybe we should try the meeting in the middle thing you talked about last week before we decide it’s not going to work,” she said.
“I’ll be in rehab for at least six months now, most likely a year. In Seattle.” He let out a sigh. “I’m not sure this is going to work, Kendall. You’ll be working sixty to seventy hours a week for the Miners. Our GM must be part giraffe; I don’t think that guy ever sleeps. You’
ll be so exhausted on the nights we can see each other that dating will be out of the question—”
“I’ll make it happen,” she said. “I’ll do whatever I have to do.”
“What if I want to start a marriage and a life in the house I picked out for my future family? What then?”
He realized he was starting to sound like his dad, but he’d made a plan. He wanted to see his smiling wife in a luxurious house, watch his kids playing in the grass in the backyard, and holidays and birthdays and family celebrations there all year long. Was it a crime to wish for such a thing?
“Why does it have to be your house and your city? Is there any room for compromise at all?” She pushed the plate of eggs and turkey bacon away. “I know you lived in California in college. Would Portland be an alternative? I’d have to fly in for weekends, but we could make it work.”
“I can’t get on a plane six months a year to go to practice.”
The argument could go around and around and never get anywhere. He wouldn’t budge. Right now, she couldn’t. She’d given Mr. Curtis her word last night that she would stay with the Miners until his legal problems were over at the least. The coaching staff and players needed to know that their world wasn’t changing all that much.
She glanced up from staring down at the rolling table to see him flinch in pain.
“Do you need some painkillers?” she asked.
“I don’t know when the last dose was. Maybe I should call the nurse.”
He started to get up from the chair, and she said, “Let me do it.”
DREW OPENED HIS eyes from another pharmaceutically-induced haze to see Kendall asleep in the reclining chair next to his bed. The TV in his room had been replaced while he was out too. Whoever installed it left it on ESPN. The volume was muted and the closed captioning was enabled. He noticed there was a special report coming up about the Miners’ current situation, so he hit the button on his bed to sit up a bit and turned the volume low enough that he could hear it, but not so loud it would wake up the (obviously) exhausted Kendall.
The sportscasters started out by showing a clip of the security camera footage from the hotel where Rocky Hill used his girlfriend’s face as a punching bag. Even in black and white, the pictures were chilling. The next clip was Kendall answering a question from a reporter asking her if she was ashamed the incident happened while she was acting GM of the Miners.
Kendall looked stricken by his question. She took a sip of water while she gathered her thoughts. When she spoke, her voice was strong and she looked directly into the camera. He was stunned by her admission that yes, she was ashamed. He listened to the rest of her comments with his mouth hanging open. He resisted the impulse to applaud. No wonder the owner of the Miners moved toward her at the podium to shake her hand. She’d defused a disastrous PR situation with honesty and a commitment to the future. She handled a room full of media who wielded questions like pointy sticks and didn’t back down to them.
The strong, decisive leader on his television set, the woman who said she wouldn’t let anything like it happen again on her watch, stirred a little in her sleep. The sports anchors were now opining on what this all meant for the Miners. He didn’t care what they had to say about the whole thing, so he hit the “mute” button again.
He was so proud of her. Even more, it was evident to him that Kendall would dedicate herself to home, family, and her career. Watching her lead a franchise in trouble made him understand she was born for the job, even if she wasn’t sure she wanted it. She’d have a husband and a family, but she wouldn’t be happy if the only things she had to worry about were what she’d serve for dinner, or getting the kids to their soccer practice beforehand. He knew she would love her family and do her best, but she would also have a career that absorbed and challenged her, whether it was with the Miners or another pro football franchise.
His dad was currently having heartburn over his mom’s serving him pasta sauce out of a jar because she was enjoying the opportunity to have a job. His mom wanted a challenge too, and she went out and got it. It wasn’t about Kendall’s serving him takeout for meals or forgetting to wash his shorts. How was he going to deal with the fact she lived in another state and could not move, let alone the knowledge that she had a lot bigger things on her plate than whether or not things in their house were running smoothly?
If he wanted Kendall, his definition of the perfect family needed to change. They would be handling the details of any future home together. They might have those holidays and birthdays and friends over to visit, but it might not be in a suburb twenty miles east of Seattle. Whether he realized it or not, Drew’s dad had taught him a very valuable lesson. Home wasn’t a place in which one person worked to meet the needs of her entire family. It was a place in which everyone worked together to take care of each other.
He glanced up to see his mom and dad in the corridor outside the room.
“Shhh,” he said, putting one finger over his lips.
“This must be Kendall,” his mom whispered.
His dad gave Drew a nod. “Let me go find out if I can get another chair or two,” he muttered.
Kendall stirred again and opened her eyes. “Oh. I must have fallen asleep,” she said. “I’m so sorry.” She smothered a yawn, stretched a bit, and got to her feet. She extended her hand to Drew’s mom. “You must be Mrs. McCoy. I’m Kendall.”
Drew’s mom hurried around his bed and threw her arms around Kendall.
“It’s so nice to meet you. You are as lovely as Drew told me.”
“He’s been bragging about you also. It’s wonderful to meet you.”
“Call me Bonnie,” his mom said, gesturing for Kendall to take the chair. “My husband went to get a couple more chairs so we could sit here and have a good visit.”
Bonnie kissed her son on the forehead and said, “Is there anything we can get for you, honey?”
“A new shoulder would be nice.”
“I’ll do my best,” Bonnie told him. “How about some brunch in the meantime? I’ll ask the nurse if you can have something to eat. I’ll be right back.”
DREW PATTED THE bed next to him when his parents wandered out of the room. Kendall perched on it.
“Maybe we could continue our conversation later on.”
“I’d like that.”
She was thinking the chances of that happening were small to none. Drew’s parents would most likely stay until visiting hours were over, and part of the deal she’d struck with her boss was the fact she’d be back in San Francisco by tomorrow morning. The Miners had a bye next week, so she could come back on Friday afternoon and stay until Monday morning.
She wasn’t sure how she and Drew could realistically make things work. She couldn’t telecommute. She had to be in the Miners’ offices at least five days a week to do her job, and most of those workdays stretched into the evening hours. Any relationship they managed to carve out would wither and die due to absence and inattention.
He was also facing the biggest challenge of his professional life. Would he be able to come back from such a catastrophic injury, or would he be forced into retirement? If he had to retire, he might want to move where she was, but she couldn’t count on that. He’d be facing the biggest fear of all NFL players forced into premature retirement: Who would he be after a life spent being Drew McCoy, football star? He’d have to start over. Even more, he’d have to redefine himself, and many former players struggled with that challenge.
Drew didn’t seem interested in coaching. He’d lose his mind being stuck in a broadcasting booth each Sunday for six months a year. He probably thought he had several years to decide what he wanted to do after football. Those years had evaporated on Dallas’s turf last Sunday morning.
He might resent her because she still earned a living from football, and he did not.
Chapter Seventeen
* * *
LATER THAT DAY, Kendall pulled the blankets up Drew’s chest as she watched his eyelids flutter sh
ut. The nurses had re-packed and changed his dressing about half an hour ago. They’d pumped him full of painkillers before they did it, but the pain etched on his face told her whatever shot they gave him wasn’t quite enough. He was exhausted. His parents had left a few minutes ago.
She wished she could stay.
“They’re letting me take a shower tomorrow, baby,” he whispered. “Can’t wait.”
She had to smile. “Alone?”
“I’ll have a couple of assistants. Maybe you’d like to help too.”
“Sounds steamy,” she said. “Are you sure you’re ready for all that action?”
“Bring it on,” he said.
She leaned over the bed and touched her mouth to his as she stroked his hair. His mom had brushed the tangles out of it earlier and put it back into a ponytail, but it was already rumpled.
“I heard you’re getting out of here tomorrow.”
“That’s what the doctor said.”
He was half-asleep. She had to leave. There was so much to say and he wasn’t awake to talk about any of it. She’d spent the entire afternoon talking and laughing with him and his parents instead.
Neil and Bonnie McCoy were terrific people. She really liked them. She knew her parents would love Drew. He would joke with her dad and flirt with her mom, and there wouldn’t be in-law problems or unpleasantness. The longer she stayed, the more she ignored the truth.
It wasn’t going to work between them. Neither of them was willing to give an inch on the compromises needed to make any relationship thrive. She could give up the things she wanted to be with him, but she knew she’d resent those sacrifices. She’d be giving up her own goals and aspirations, and that scared her more than a lifetime of being alone.
He could retire or get himself traded to a team in California, and he’d still be wondering if he’d done the right thing. Bitterness would build.
Covering Kendall Page 20
