by Rose, Willow
I swallowed, remembering how much I had missed those two. Back in high school, we had been inseparable. We had shared everything. Then I went off to college, and we lost contact, even though we tried to keep it.
Both Melissa and Dawn had attended local colleges and stayed in town like most people did. Meanwhile, I had run away as fast as I could.
Melissa handed me a glass of wine, then smiled.
"Now, you tell us everything. From the beginning."
I took in a deep breath, then sipped my wine. I told them everything. Beginning with the day a month ago when I had come home from work and found the kids home alone.
"At first, I thought he had probably just popped out for pizza or maybe some wine," I said. "So, I walked to my bedroom and got into some more comfortable clothes and, when I opened the walk-in closet, half of it was empty. His side was nothing but empty hangers. That's when panic set in. I ran to the kids’ rooms, and they were just hanging out. They had no idea where their dad was. He had been there a few hours earlier, Christine told me. She thought he had passed out in front of the TV.
"So, he didn't even say goodbye?" Dawn asked, almost dropping the piece of pie on her fork.
I shook my head. "He had just left. I called him, but he didn't pick up. Needless to say, I didn't sleep at all that night. The next morning, he finally picked up. He was at Kimmie's, he said. He lived there now. I didn't even know who Kimmie was. Apparently, he had been seeing her for quite some time now. More than a year. They had met at Olivia's school play, where they were both volunteering, doing the props together. Her son went to Olivia's school. He was done, he said. With me, with our life together, with everything."
"Oh, the bastard," Melissa said and sipped her wine, fuming. "And to think that you supported him all that time. He never worked, did he?"
"I made enough money, so he didn't need to work at all, but he wanted to. So, he started selling health insurance out of the house. But in the beginning, we had a deal. I was to work, and he would stay at home, at least while the kids were young. He was the one who suggested it be that way, and now, that was why he was leaving me. He didn't feel appreciated, he said. Kimmie appreciated him."
"But you got to keep the kids?" Melissa asked, her big brown eyes staring at me.
I shrugged. "Nothing's settled yet. So far, he and Kimmie went on a trip to Greece. I’m guessing we'll deal with it when he comes back. I told him I wanted the kids, that he was the one who left, so he wasn't getting them."
"But…you moved down here?" Dawn asked. "Why?"
"I needed to get away. I couldn't stay at that house; I couldn't stay in the job. I tried for the first few weeks, but it didn't work. I was too much of a mess. The kids and I were constantly fighting, and I couldn't handle both them and my job. It was too much. I wanted to come back to be close to my family, to start over, fresh. Chad said it was okay. I get the feeling that he doesn’t really want the kids anymore. I don't know how you can just turn it off like that, but it feels like he has. I fear that he's going to start a new family with that Kimmie character and forget all about us, forget about his children."
"Oh, the bastard," Melissa repeated.
"So, you don't work for the FBI anymore?" Dawn asked, sounding almost disappointed.
"Nope. I quit," I said and sipped more wine. "I needed a break."
"But why? You had this big career and everything? We were so proud of you," Dawn said.
That made me smile. "I don't know if there really is much to be proud of."
"Nothing to be proud of?" Melissa gaped. "What are you talking about? You made a difference in that job. Remember when you solved that case with that guy who had kept children in his house for years and raped them and made those awful videos? I think you made quite a difference to them."
"And to all the other children he will never touch in the future," Dawn added. "Don't think we didn't hear about your accomplishments down here."
I felt mushy. Maybe it was the wine. I stared at them and their pride-filled eyes looking back at me. They seriously saw me as some hero? The case they mentioned was so many years ago. How could I tell them I had screwed up? That I had messed up a case and lost a child in the process?
I decided not to.
"Aw, you guys."
"So, what are you going to do now?" Dawn asked. "You can't just be a full-time mom, can you?"
"Hey," Melissa complained, "I’m a full-time mom."
Dawn pointed at me. "Her. I’m talking about her. It's Eva Rae Thomas. She couldn't sit still if her life depended on it."
"She's right. I am not going to be a full-time mom," I said. "Or, that is, I am, but I am also doing something else. I’m writing another book."
"Uhhh, that sounds awesome. What's it about?" Melissa said.
"Serial killers. I signed a contract with a big publishing house to write about the minds of some of the most notorious serial killers in US history. You know, seen from a profiler's perspective."
"Nice," Dawn said.
I shrugged and looked at the boxes still surrounding us. "If I can ever get to it. Between unpacking and taking care of the kids, I don't really have much time."
"It'll come," Melissa said. "Speaking of gruesome murders, did you hear about Jenna's daughter?"
I nodded. Dawn did too. "Awful," she said. "Can you imagine? Going through a divorce and then this? She must be devastated. That girl was her entire life. She homeschooled her and everything, so she could focus on her surfing. Jenna took her to competitions every freakin' weekend."
"And she was good. We haven't seen anyone like her since Kelly," Melissa said. "At least that's what they say. I have never surfed myself, so I really don't know much about it."
"It's truly awful," Dawn said. "I mean, who would want to harm Sophie Williams? We all freakin' loved her. She could draw quite the crowd when she surfed by the pier—such a talent. It's a shame. It's going to crush so many around here."
"I feel for her mother," Melissa said. "Can you imagine losing your daughter like that? I hope they catch the bastard and do the same to him. But until then, I, for one, am keeping a close eye on my children. I bet the dad did it, though."
"Why do you say that?" I asked.
"They went through a custody battle. But not because of the girl. He wanted part of her money. You know her sponsorships, her prize money and so on. That girl was made of pure gold. She's made a ton of commercials and has modeled for all kinds of stuff, like those expensive watches and sports drinks. They say the girl is good for almost five hundred thousand already, and they predicted she would go on to make millions once she got a little older. He wasn't going to let all that money go without a fight. It got ugly and was in all the papers. The media loved the stuff. They were all over it."
"But why would he kill her if he wanted the money?" I asked. "She's not going to make him anything now."
"To get back at his ex? So she wouldn't get anything either. I don't know. You're the expert here. You tell me."
"You were there, weren't you?" Dawn asked. "When she was found. Mrs. Hannigan from down my street said she saw you…and Matt."
Melissa gave me a look. "You were hanging out with Matt?"
I shook my head. "Not exactly hanging out. I happened to be in the area when the woman who found her came running into the street. I actually almost hit her with my car. Then I called Matt. I knew he was on the case. That's all there is to that story."
"I bet you and Matt are going to solve the case together," Dawn said.
"And then live happily ever after," Melissa added. They laughed and clinked glasses.
"Dream on," I said. "I am not exactly looking to hook up with anyone right now. I’m in the middle of a divorce, in case you didn't notice. Kind of brokenhearted right now."
"It's always been you two," Melissa said, completely ignoring what I had said. "Remember how he used to run after you in pre-school? He got himself in so much trouble because he kissed you once. The teachers had to have his parents come in and ev
erything."
"I don't remember that," I said.
"Well, you were four," Melissa said. "I just have a freakishly good memory. At least when it comes to stuff like this. He also gave you a ring once, I recall. On the playground at the school."
"That, I remember," I said. "I also remember giving it back to him in fifth grade because I thought he had grown to be rude and annoying."
"But you dated in high school. You can't have forgotten that," Dawn said.
I sighed and leaned back in my chair. "Only a few times. We were best friends. I didn't want to ruin that."
"I think he saved himself for you. Waited for you to come back," Melissa said.
"You're such a romantic," Dawn said. "He just couldn't find anyone as good as her. You ruined him."
"Either way, he's single and has loved you forever. It doesn’t get any more romantic than that," Melissa said, her eyes swimming.
I threw a spoonful of the whipped cream at her, and she ducked. Then we laughed. Her smile created dimples in her round cheeks. Hearing them both laugh like that made me remember how much I loved hanging out with them. Being back with them felt more like home than D.C. ever did for fifteen years.
Chapter 15
We talked for hours. I called for pizza, and we ate with the children while laughing loudly and sharing fond memories and catching me up on everyone in town. I quickly learned that Melissa's husband, Steve, had been diagnosed with MS a couple of years ago, and was fighting the symptoms that grew more and more persistent each day. Meanwhile, Dawn still hadn't settled down with anyone yet.
There was a honk from a car outside, and Dawn's face lit up. "That's Phillip."
"Phillip?" I asked.
"Her latest boyfriend," Melissa said with a deep sigh.
"What?" Dawn asked. "He's cute."
"He's a firefighter," Melissa said as Dawn rushed to the door and waved for him to come in.
"He's more than that," Dawn said. "He's the captain. Here he comes."
Melissa rolled her eyes. Phillip came to the door, and Dawn grabbed his hand. "I want you to meet someone," she said.
Phillip smiled and approached me, holding out his hand. "You must be Eva Rae Thomas."
"I am."
"I live right down the street from you. Two houses down. I’ve heard a lot about you," he said.
"Oh, really?"
"Yeah, well, people talk; you know."
"They sure do," I said.
"Phillip came to town two years ago from Daytona Beach," Dawn said, still holding his hand in hers.
"I see, and how do you find it here?" I asked.
He smiled. "Hot and humid. Listen, we should get going. It's late, and I have to be at the station early tomorrow."
Dawn gave me a hug and told me how happy she was that I was back before they left. Melissa shook her head.
"What? You don't like him?" I asked.
"He's too perfect; you know?"
I chuckled. "How can anyone be too perfect?"
"He just is. You should see his house. Everything is so neat. And clean. Dawn says he cleans all the time when he's not working."
"Does he have any children?" I asked and grabbed another piece of the pie that Dawn had left behind.
"A daughter," she said. "Recently divorced. According to Dawn, he is perfect. But a guy like him is bound to have a few skeletons in his closet, am I right? Nobody is that perfect. I mean, did you see his body? You can practically count the muscles through his shirt. It's too much."
"I take it you're not a fan of them dating," I said and poured us some more wine. The kids were too quiet upstairs, and I had to get Alex to bed soon but hanging out with my friends made me feel better than I had in a very long time. Even before Chad told me he was leaving me. I was beginning to realize I hadn't been happy for years. It wasn't just the divorce; this had started way earlier.
"I don't know," Melissa said. "I’m happy for her, but I just hope he treats her right, you know? She has a way of picking them."
I bit my lip, remembering her with Tim who she had dated right after high school. I also remembered the bruises she was trying covering up with heavy make-up when I met up with her when coming back for winter break from college. My guess was he wasn't the only one she had found who had been abusive to her. Just like her dad had been when we were growing up.
"She had cancer, you know?"
I shook my head, almost choking on my wine. "No. I didn't."
"Ovaries," she said. "Had it all removed down there. Can never have children."
I sighed and leaned back in my chair. My friends had been through so much while I had been gone, and I had no idea. They had needed me, and I hadn't been there for them. Just like I hadn't been there for my family. I had been busy saving others, yes, but at what cost?
As I said goodbye to Melissa, who needed to get home to the kids and Steve, I couldn't stop thinking about that poor girl Sophie and her mother, Jenna. I wondered if Matt would get any sleep at all tonight. I, for one, knew the images of the poor girl lying in that sleeping bag were going to haunt me for a very long time.
Chapter 16
"I don't want to wear that!"
Alex growled and pulled off his pants that I had just helped him put on.
"No, Alex," I said, then looked at the clock on the stove. We only had ten minutes before the bus would be here. We had overslept, and I hadn't made lunches yet.
Olivia came rushing down the stairs, then grabbed the milk and poured some on a bowl of cereal. She had headphones in her ears, and they were playing very loudly while she ate and put on shoes at the same time.
"Why are you up already?" I asked. She stared at me like she didn't understand. I signaled for her to pull out the headphones, then repeated the question.
"I have A-OK club today before school," she growled at me. "I told you Friday that I joined this club for volunteer hours. You should know this by now, Mom."
I stared at her but didn't want to ask what A-OK club was since I had a feeling I had asked before.
"Okay," I said. "And what time are you out today?"
Olivia sighed deeply, then grabbed her backpack. "I have volleyball practice. It's Monday, Mom. You know this."
"Volleyball, check. I got it."
Olivia stared at me.
"What?"
"Lunch?" she said.
"Shoot!" I replied. "I'll give you money."
Olivia rolled her eyes and walked away. "Never mind. I already have money."
Then she left. My eyes fell on Alex standing by the fridge. He had no pants on. They were lying on the floor in front of him.
"Alex!"
"It's Monday," his sister said coming down the stairs. She picked up his pants and folded them. "On Mondays, he always wears his Star Wars pants."
"What?" I asked.
Christine shrugged. "It's been like that since Kindergarten. You really should know this, Mom. Dad would always make sure his pants were washed and ready for him."
"And since I haven't done the laundry this weekend, they aren’t. I see."
"I want my pants," Alex yelled and stomped his feet. I sighed deeply. "Well, you can't have them. They're dirty."
On that response, Alex threw himself on the floor in a regular fit of rage. I felt so worn out, so exhausted, I didn't know what to do. Christine sighed, then disappeared up the stairs. She came down holding his red Star Wars pants featuring Darth Vader on the right leg and Chewbacca on the left.
"Here. Wear them even if they stink," she said and threw the pants at the boy.
Alex grabbed them happily and put them on. I looked at my daughter with gratefulness. She grabbed the milk jug standing on the counter, then shook it.
"Really? We're out of milk…again?"
I stared at her. "What? How is that possible? How are we out of milk already? I just bought this yesterday? How did you kids drink a gallon of milk in less than twenty-four hours?"
Christine sighed. "Really, Mom? It's our fault now?
Maybe next time you should buy some more."
I exhaled. The girl was right. I should get better at planning ahead.
"All right. I'll buy two gallons today. Until then, can you just eat it with no milk, please? After that, I'll drive you both to school since I just saw the bus drive past our house."
Chapter 17
I didn't go back home after dropping off the kids. Instead, I continued through my neighborhood and stopped at a house two streets down. The Williams were new in town, or at least they hadn't been there back when I used to live here. But I knew they had moved into old Mrs. Robinson's house after she died ten years ago.
I walked up the driveway holding a box of chocolates I had bought at the gas station in my hand. I rang the doorbell.
It took a little while before Jenna opened the door. Her eyes were bulging and red. She looked like she hadn't slept in a year. I smiled compassionately, then handed her the chocolates.
"I thought I had to at least bring something."
"You and everyone else," she said, then opened the door, so I could see all the flowers and covered pans with food in them. "Come on in."
I followed her inside. The house was dark and had a musty smell to it. We walked to her kitchen, and she put the chocolates down. There was hardly room on the counter for all the food.
"I don't know why everyone seems to think lasagna is what you need when you lose your child," she said. "I can't fit it all my fridge. Please, take one home with you."
"How are you?" I asked.
"How am I? Well…I guess…at least, I finally got closure, right? That's what they all tell me. But I didn't want closure. I wanted my daughter back. I want to hold her in my arms. I want to be down on that beach watching her surf. I want to drive her to North Carolina this weekend for the nationals."
I sighed. "It must be tough. I can't even imagine."
Jenna grabbed a photo of Sophie from the fridge and looked at it. "This was her first time surfing. She stood up on her first try. Look at her face. She was so happy. I never could get her out of the water ever since. She lived and breathed for that sport. It was her everything. I wanted her to have that dream come true. To be able to live off of what she loved."
