by Cora Kenborn
“This toast is going downhill fast,” Eliza warned. “Wrap it up, son.”
“What I’m trying to say is I hope one day I find someone I love as much as my brother loves Phoebe.” He raised his glass in the air. “I just hope my niece or nephew inherits its uncle’s musical abilities, which far outweigh its father’s. Happy twenty-third, Phoebe!”
Julian groaned behind me, and I giggled while leaning in and dusting a kiss across his forehead. Everyone lifted their glass while turning their eyes toward us. Running a hand up the length of my back, he gently pulled me in for a kiss.
“I will refrain from stating the obvious—that we’re in a public place, and you two are making out like you’re in the back of an El Camino. But I will say, bro, if you don’t get your ass up right now, I’m heading to the bar and getting shitfaced with your toxic brother.”
With a sigh, Julian pulled back. “Z, you have shitty timing.”
Zane shrugged and turned up the last bit of his drink. “This was your idea, Jag. It’s your dime, so it makes no difference to me. By all means, continue sucking face. Wouldn’t mind doing a little of that myself.” He turned his head and I followed his gaze to where Faith was wildly gesturing to Ryker and Gage with animated expressions.
I smiled knowingly. “Zane, Faith Addison might be more woman than you can handle.”
“I’ve handled my share.”
“I’m not referring to your score card. She’s taken, Zane. Trust me on this.”
He grinned and scratched the back of his head. “I like a challenge, Phoebe. It excites me.”
“The fucking wind excites you, Zane.” Julian smirked. “Seriously, man, please don’t get Phoebe’s friend drunk and take her home. I’ll never hear the end of it.”
I nodded in agreement. “He’s right, he’ll never hear the end of it. Which means”—I lifted a hand and pointed directly at Zane—“you’ll never hear the end of it.”
Holding up his hands, Zane dropped his head. “Okay, geez, you two are ruthless.”
Julian stood and deposited me on my feet. “I have to go for a few minutes. I’ll be back.”
I tilted my head to the side. “Where are you going?”
Smiling, he pressed my hand against his lips, grazing the plastic ring on my finger. “You’ll see. Patience is a virtue, baby.”
He turned and followed Zane down the walkway and through some double doors. They slammed shut, leaving me standing there. I wrapped my arms around my abdomen and lowered my voice to a slight whisper. “What in the hell does your daddy have planned?”
Chapter Forty-Three
Julian
Ryker captured my gaze. With a grin, he shrugged and nodded toward the stage. “What have you done, big brother?”
Zane chuckled. “Whatever it is, you know Jag, it’ll be overdone and flashy.”
As I started to respond, the room went completely black. From the makeshift stage in front of the dance floor, a stream of blue, red, and yellow lights flashed in sequence and a hush fell over the club. The electricity thickened and I knew the gathering of friends and family were getting antsy at what was to come.
Hell, I was getting antsy.
“I told you,” I whispered. “It’s a surprise for Phoebe.” Her silhouette wasn’t entirely visible in the darkness, but I’d know it anywhere.
“But do we have to play this douchey song?” Ryker complained. “I thought we were hardcore.” My brother had stepped into Tanna’s role for a few weeks now and, other than his constant bitching, he fit right in. It was nice to finally know every member of the band was family and not harboring a secret past, hell-bent on revenge.
“Ryker, shut your face-hole and play.” The command from Zane made me laugh.
We’re gonna be okay.
Through the piercing yellow light, we walked to the front of the stage. The outline of the crowd cut through the haze as more light bathed them in brightness. On Zane’s cue, I meticulously began strumming random chords on the guitar.
Glancing to my side, I locked eyes with Zane, who’d already found his optical target sitting across the table from Phoebe. I followed his gaze, to where Faith genuinely smiled, staring back at him as if they were the only two people in the room.
So much for Faith’s marriage to the Hollywood producer.
Refocusing, I lifted my head to the microphone and cleared my throat. A rush of adrenaline surged through me. Lords of Lyre was a cohesive group, but at that moment, I felt like I owned the room.
“So, this was supposed to be an informal thing, just a few songs for our friends and family. However, it seems we sound much better baking in yellow lights, so, thanks to the management for making it, like, nine thousand degrees up here,” I joked.
“You’re welcome, ingrate,” Helena called out from one of the tables.
An echo of laughter filled the room as the instantaneous applause beckoned for more banter. Zane enticed everyone by strumming chords, his tattooed hand moving expertly across the taut strings. Tapping my fingers against the microphone stand, I rocked back on my heels, scanning the room.
“So while Zane stands here and shows Faith his magical stroking abilities, I’ll tell you the real reason we’re here tonight.” My eyes darted over to Zane, who stared daggers at me. I chuckled and turned back to face the crowd. “Most of you got a call from me asking you to be here tonight.”
“No, we got a call from you telling us to be here tonight.”
The corners of my mouth turned up as I narrowed my eyes and scanned the crowd again. “I can’t see you, Harlow, but I’d know that smart-ass mouth of yours anywhere.” Pausing to allow the snickers to die down, I searched the darkness again. “So, as I was saying, I asked you all to be here for one person.”
Still scanning, I felt the instant her eyes found me. A single glance from that woman made me one exposed nerve. My lips brushed the microphone as I gestured to her, crooking my finger to beckon her forward.
It’s now or never.
“Phoebe? Come here, princess.” She rose out of the chair and fluidly moved toward me. I guided her up the steps until she stood beside me. Her bright blue eyes bathed in the pale yellow light looked back at me with anticipation. Lifting her hand to my mouth, I lightly pressed a kiss against her skin. I held onto her hand as I spoke to the crowd. “I’m sure most of you know by now, because my mother can’t keep a secret to save her life.” Looking into the crowd, I couldn’t help but snicker at the mocked astonishment painted across my mom’s face.
“It’s cruel and unusual punishment to tell your mother such news and expect me to keep it a secret, son.”
I gestured into the air with my free hand. “Well, there you go, welcome to my childhood.” I wrapped an arm around Phoebe’s waist, her heated skin imprinting against mine. “It’s going to be physically impossible to hide the fact that Phoebe and I are having a baby.” Thunderous applause erupted, and I paused, tightening my arm around her. “But what might not be so obvious is the other announcement I have.”
She had no clue what was coming and I hoped I didn’t get slapped for it. With my free hand, I raised her left hand in the air, the yellow light spotlighting the black plastic band. A hush fell across the club. Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out the diamond ring I’d bought while the band was on the west coast. It was big, flashy, and everything Phoebe wasn’t. It still wasn’t big enough for me. I’d buy her a rock the size of a mountain. I wanted it broadcasted from a hundred yards away that she was taken.
I slipped the ring over the plastic band. “We’re also getting married. So, to all you guys out there, she’s officially mine,” I announced as Phoebe’s mouth dropped open.
“She’s not a side of beef, Jag.” Zane muttered beside me.
Taking my eyes off Phoebe momentarily, I tilted my head. “I forgot how you’re the authority on meat, Z.” The room erupted into laughter again. “As I was saying, I always knew Phoebe was the one, from the first night she attacked me in this club.” I
glanced at her, hoping humor would ease the shock and the backlash.
“Oh please. I was here that day. You were the attacker, dude.”
I quirked an eyebrow as Ty’s voice piped up behind me. At least he was speaking now. “I hear you, Ty. All right, so I was the aggressor, but can you blame me?” I faced Phoebe and the whole room vanished except for the two of us.
We stood almost exactly in the same place we met less than four months ago. It seemed like a lifetime ago but then seemed like yesterday. It blew my mind that life had changed so drastically.
Her chin trembled. “I—”
I cut her off, needing to finish what I started. “You captivated me from the first minute I saw you. I know it seemed like we wouldn’t make it, but here we are. Thank you for giving my life back to me. Thank you for making me a father, but mostly thank you for being the other half of my lost soul.”
Son of a bitch.
I’d never been that honest before.
Tears cascaded down her cheeks as she whispered my name and shook her head, as if in disbelief. The only sounds to be heard were the spontaneous “Awws” that escaped from the crowd. Reaching up, I placed my hand on the side of her face and brushed my thumb across her cheek. Leaning into it, she briefly closed her eyes, the moment completely taking ownership of both of us. I led her to a chair at the edge of the stage. Once more, I dusted lips across hers.
Back at the microphone, I gripped the stand, and spoke with raw emotion. “Some things are private, so I’m not going to explain why I’m singing this particular song, especially since it breaks from our normal style. I’ll just say, listen to the words, princess—I love you.”
The lights dimmed and with rhythmic strokes, Zane’s fingers strummed the chords I’d hear forever, as he began the first musical intro of U2’s “Iris.”
The title of the song spoke of our story’s beginning, but the words were to remind her of our pasts, our struggles to get where we were, and the promise she held within her body.
Life had come full circle, ending and beginning interwoven within the lyrics of a song.
Epilogue
THREE MONTHS LATER
Phoebe
The box from the bedroom weighed so much that I had to stop and readjust positions, eventually letting it fall to the living room floor from my arms. I stopped in the doorway and turned around. Through the tears, everything blurred as I looked around the room.
The walls were empty, and the echo signified the end of an era. My entire life was boxed up and waiting to be moved into Julian’s. Gone were the couch on which I’d spilled countless glasses laughing with Gage and the mirror in the foyer. That same mirror provided one last look at my appearance before heading off to the Circa album release party, hoping to catapult my career with some band.
Not all the memories were good. The hardwood flooring, after months of scrubbing, still harbored dark stains of spilled life. All different kinds of memories, but still inherently me.
“Yeah, I know. I know. I know, Helena. Look, I’ll just call when we get there. I said I know we’re on a deadline, it’s under control.” Julian rounded the corner, took one look at my face, and his eyebrows rose with concern. “Helena, I have to go now…yes, now.” He dropped his phone and enclosed me in his arms.
This is the last thing he needs.
“Baby, what’s wrong?” Taking his thumb, he wiped the tear away before it fell down my cheek.
“Nothing.” I choked out the words as a new wave of tears sprang forth. “I’m just a big, pregnant, hormonal mess.”
The ghost dimple emerged as he brushed a piece of hair away from my face. “While I normally would agree with that, I know there’s something else. Don’t shut me out.”
How did I tell a man who’d been so supportive that leaving home was killing me? I glanced at the floor, silently willing the tears away.
He placed his finger under my chin and tilted my face to meet his. “You know that’s not going to work with me.”
I shook my head in protest. “You have business to handle.”
“Says who?”
“Your manager,” I pointed out, raking my hand down my ponytail. “Helena sounded pretty pissed.”
His penetrating stare narrowed. “She’ll get over it.”
“Julian, stop being stupid.” Sighing, I fidgeted from one foot to the other.
“Out with it, Ryan. I can stand here all day if I have to.”
“Okay, fine.” Sucking in a deep breath, I looked him in the eyes and let it all tumble out. “I love you. You know that, right? But this is just…hard. Everything’s changing. Gage has moved in with Parker, and I never see him anymore. This place is all I’ve known since moving here. It was my first attempt at trying to figure out who I really was. It was a place I came back to when things weren’t so great between us. It’s hard to let it all go, that’s all.”
He rested his palm across my cheek. “Don’t you think I know that? I know what an upheaval this is for you.” He pulled me to him. “But I promise I’ll never do anything to make you feel like you have to run back to this. I want you to feel like you are home in New Jersey. I want to know that when I come home, you will be there waiting…and happy.”
Leaning my forehead against his chin, I ran my hand ran down his chest. “I am happy, Julian. I’m going to be with you.”
Bringing my hand to his face, he rested my fingers against his lips. “Do you see this?” I nodded at the diamond ring surrounding my finger. “This means that whatever I do it’s for you and our baby.” He moved the ring and smiled as the plastic band peeked out from underneath. “This means that sometimes you have to trust me even though you think I’m batshit crazy.” He paused and slightly frowned. “I want to marry you as soon as possible, Phoebe.”
I pulled my hand away from him. “Julian, we’ve talked about this.”
“No, you talked, I listened.”
“We don’t have to do it before the baby’s born. It’s not taboo anymore, you know.”
“You’re almost six months pregnant, so time isn’t on our side. And it has nothing to do with the baby.” I quirked an eyebrow at him, and he rolled his eyes in response. “Okay, maybe it does, but it isn’t the only thing.”
“Please don’t do this to me right now,” I pleaded with him. Dropping my forehead against his chest, I sneaked a peek up at his face, gauging his reaction.
He momentarily closed his eyes. “All right, I’ll drop it for now. But this conversation isn’t over.” A small smile played on his lips. “Besides, there are better things we could be doing with our mouths than talking.”
Tilting my chin, I licked my lips in anticipation. “Oh? Do tell.”
A devilish gleam flashed in his eyes as he backed me toward the kitchen counter, his hands reaching for the buttons on my shirt. “How about I show you?”
Closing my eyes, I wrapped my arms around his neck and lost myself in the feel of his mouth trailing down the skin exposed by my open blouse. As his hands reached for the waistband of my pants, I exhaled softly, resolving to let the past go.
***
“Thank you for doing this, Julian. I know you’re not happy about it, but you’re being a good sport.” Straightening my dress, I leaned down to adjust the strap on my heel while peering up at him.
As his hands worked on his tie he looked at me in the mirror and quirked an eyebrow. “Well, you didn’t give me much of a choice, did you?”
I couldn’t stop the soft snort that escaped. With one fluid motion, he put on his suit jacket, adjusting the sleeves of his shirt underneath. He was the only man I’d ever seen who looked just as gorgeous in a t-shirt and jeans as he did a three-piece suit. I gave my hair one last fluff and blew it out of my face.
“If I’d given you a choice, would you have gone along with it?” I asked skeptically.
“Yes.”
“Liar.”
“Well, you’ve got to admit, your sister isn’t one of my biggest fans, princess,”
he said, giving me a knowing look. “I kind of knocked up her baby sister and moved her to Jersey. And just in case I forget to say it later, you owe me.”
Sauntering over to him, I adjusted his collar, purposely running my forefinger along the length of his jawline. “Owe you? For what, might I ask?”
He peered down at me with a heavy-lidded gaze, and crooked his index finger to motion me closer. I couldn’t stop the involuntary shiver as he pressed his lips against my ear. “For making me play nice with Chloe. Trust me, I plan to collect.”
I took a step back from him. It was my turn to quirk an eyebrow. “Oh, you do, do you? Didn’t your mother ever teach you not to make threats, Julian?”
He ran his thumb across my bottom lip, tracing the outline before dropping his hand back by his side. “My mother taught me lots of things, Phoebe. One of which is to never make a scene in public. I wonder if your sister holds herself to the same standards.”
My shoulders slumped as I rolled my eyes and groaned.
Damn, here it comes.
I’d been living with Julian over a week and had put off telling him about Chloe coming to visit until the last possible moment. He was right, Chloe blamed him for everything that had happened, no matter what I said to the contrary.
I knew he wasn’t happy when I’d told him about the dinner invitation. Chloe had called, informing me that their flight had gotten in earlier than expected and she wanted to take “that man” and me to dinner. Her voice had been strained, as if she tried to corral every ounce of strength she had to not say something derogatory about Julian.
“Play nice and I’ll play nice…Jagger.” I grinned as he swatted my ass.
With time to spare, we decided to clean up the mess Zane and Ty had left in the kitchen earlier. I’d just sprayed down the counter with cleaner when my phone rang. Looking at the caller ID, I blew out a breath and balanced the phone between my chin and my shoulder.
