Andrej saw what she had discovered. "Careful! It's a trap!" His searching eyes scanned the ground. "I'm quite sure it's not the only one around here."
With great caution, Lilith scrutinized the device, carefully removing the twigs and some old leaves. The trap was the size of a plate and made of iron, with sharp, curved spikes around the edges.
Andrej stood next to Lilith and bent down. "If the animal steps on this trigger in the middle, the iron teeth will snap close and pierce themselves forcefully through the flesh down to the bone. Look." He picked up a stick from the ground and pressed the rigger with it. Immediately, the trap snapped shut with such force that the stick's bark splintered. "The trapped animal will perish painfully and it will take a long time. Unfortunately, it is common practice to hunt with these."
Indescribable fury rose in Lilith, but she kept her face expressionless, not wanting the man to know. Without comment, she stepped over the trap and went on her way, followed by Andrej.
After awhile, they arrived at a secluded lake. It was clearer than the murky, dark depths of the waters that surrounded the castle.
Andrej stared at the calm, moon-reflecting surface, until he had gathered enough courage to talk to Lilith, who also stared silently at the water. Embarrassed, he cleared his throat. "I've been meaning to ask you something for a long time now." He waited, not daring to make eye contact.
Lilith was relaxed. She even smiled slightly. "Ask away... I won't bite."
Andrej grimaced, but wasn't deterred. "I would like to know... uh... what is the most horrible death a vampire can have?"
Anxiously, he waited for Lilith's reaction.
At first, the vampire didn't say anything, her gaze remaining on the lake.
Thinking that she wouldn't respond at all, Andrej was about to apologize for his frank question.
The vampire wrinkled her forehead in suspicion. "What a strange question. It doesn't have anything to do with a sudden, unpredictable decease of my person, does it?"
When Andrej didn't laugh, she realized that he was very serious about this matter. Lilith regarded his face, which was cast in shadows. The expression of his eyes made her see the reason for his question. "Sadden. It is about her, isn't it? And you are asking me, because you cannot ask her."
The tall man swallowed. "Please, my motives are of no meaning," he urged impatiently.
The vampire sighed wistfully. "The most horrible death for a vampire is... suicide."
Andrej's face reflected wonder and disillusionment.
"Frankly spoken, you seem to be... disappointed." Lilith turned away and stirred the water with her fingertips. It rippled softly. She laughed. "I see my answer didn't meet your high expectations. I am sure you thought about a very brutal and bloody spectacle."
His thoughts still tumbling, Andrej tried to explain his reaction. "It's just... I mean... sure, in religion suicide means you don't go to heaven and end up in hell. But for vampires..."
Lilith groaned. "You do not understand. You can't compare this to human belief. Vampires are born immortal. We must not get rid of this fate ourselves, no matter how we decide to exist. It is not for us to choose how our end will be sealed, or if there will be an end at all."
Andrej listened with bated breath. "I don't see a difference to the suicide of a human being there... except immortality, of course." Questioning, he looked at her.
Lilith turned to him and her piercing gaze penetrated his very soul. She whispered in a dangerous voice, "It's the pain. The unbearable, horrible pain, which is suffered and which everyone fears." Her voice almost broke, while she explained. "It's an insidious death. The conscience dwindles and madness conquers the mind. The body burns from the inside out, until there is nothing left of a once flawless body. Only a small heap of burnt ash."
Andrej was shocked. "You never experienced anything like it, so how can you know that?"
Absent-minded, Lilith's gaze drifted over the lake. "You don't need to hope that it will be different. Some of us are connected with each other on a level that is forsaken to humans. You would not understand. Once, I did experience this torture. It was an agonizing, slow death." She shuddered at the memory. "No vampire should end their own existence. In this one moment, all powers get lost, for everyone." As if reliving the moment, Lilith continued. "All the pain, the blood-curling screams... Those, you can never forget... they are forever etched into the memories."
Andrej kept silent, trying to process what he had just heard. He thought he saw a tear running down Lilith's cheek, but that could have been a deception.
Her voice brought the shaken man back from his thoughts. "Do you understand now that Sadden would never... ever attempt suicide? At least, no vampire with a clear mind would do that," Lilith finished.
Angrily, Andrej asked, "What are you trying to suggest?"
"She has not shown herself for weeks." Her sizing gaze fell on Andrej, who stood in the shadows of the trees. "That is not normal."
"For many years she was used to contentment, until..." He glared at Lilith. "It is your fault that she broke her own basic rule."
"Do you honestly wish to start that argument again?" Lilith's eyes flashed. "I did not force her to drink. You should finally see and accept that Sadden is a vampire."
Defiantly, Andrej shook his head. "I'm not willing to do that."
She snorted scornfully. "No drop of blood shall pass over her lips? Pah! How does she want to survive, without becoming insane from thirst?"
"I don't know," Andrej sighed. Since Lilith was living with them, he began to understand that he didn't know much about vampires, although Sadden had raised him. He was tired of this conversation. "Well, we should go back to the castle. The night is fading."
The vampire followed him in silence.
On their way back, the young man and Lilith had another argument.
"I only said, if you want to be respected, you should respect others, whether they are humans or vampires," Andrej declared, angered.
Lilith balanced across a fallen beech tree and said matter-of-factly, "Don't worry. I tolerate your presence with no problem."
"Tolerate with no problem?"
"Don't think much of it," she snidely remarked. "That doesn't mean I like knowing that there is a free human under the roof of a vampire... or that I will even consider liking somebody like you."
"Right back at you," Andrej retorted, a bit miffed.
The vampire wanted to answer, but then she stopped to listen intently into the darkness of the forest. "The howling of the wolves is closer than before."
Unperturbed, Andrej continued walking. The grip around his long-barreled pistol became firmer. "That's not unusual during the season. With the beginning of autumn, the packs come down from the mountains to the valley to hunt."
"They are suffering."
"What did you just say? Sounds to me as if you are feeling sorry for these animals... oh, of course, how could I forget about the kinship between the two of you," Andrej finished his sentence mockingly.
Her eyes flashed at him dangerously. The vampire was frightened. "They are calling out in warning."
Surprised, Andrej stopped and blurted, "You really understand them?" He tried to regain his composure, because that revelation had hit him quite unexpected. "You can understand the wolves?" he repeated.
Instead of answering, Lilith asked a question of her own. "What are they so afraid of?"
"The hunters, I guess. Remember the traps we found?"
Lilith was stunned. "The wolves are being hunted?"
"Who do you think was being hunted?"
"But why?"
"In winter the animals draw closer to the village, evoking fear in the people." Andrej explained calmly.
Lilith was beside herself. "Humans are scared of everyone and everything!" she spat. "That is no excuse for setting up those terrible traps!"
"I don't say I agree with it. I'm only stating the facts. At the beginning of each autumn, the hunters, together with so
me volunteers from Ardeal, roam through the valleys. The hungry wolves are a danger for the inhabitants and their animals."
"What do they do with the animals after luring them into the traps?"
"They skin them to sell the pelts. The heads are turned into stuffed trophies." Andrej said, quietly.
Lilith was speechless. She just stared at him, before raging, "BEASTS! I knew it! You humans are disgusting creatures!" The old fire returned to her and the thoughts whirled in her mind.
Andrej watched this development with growing concern. "I don't like this tone in your voice. There is something on your mind, I can see that in your eyes. What are you intending to do?"
"I will pay them back in their own coin" Lilith murmured.
"But... you want... you don't want to try to kill the hunters, right?" Andrej stammered, nervously.
"Try? If I wanted to kill them I would succeed and not just try. No, I don't want to get my fingers dirty with that disgusting bunch. We vampires don't kill because we are in a mood, even if you like to think so. I will teach them what it feels like to step into such a barbaric trap. And they won't forget that lesson!"
"What? I don't understand what you mean." An evil thought took hold of him.
"You don't have to understand. I will let these men feel real pain."
"I can't let you do that!" Andrej cried and reached for her arm to hold her back. Dexterously, she evaded it. "I'm warning you, do not attempt that again. Don't become involved, for your own safety. Get lost, I can't ensure you'll make it out alive."
He knew it was better to heed her warning, but before he could make a decision, she had disappeared between the trees.
Worried, Andrej looked after her. "For a brief moment there was a spark of humanity inside her. Now, I'm worried to think about her intensions." He suppressed the urge to follow her. "It won't do anything good to run to the hunter's camp. She will find it faster than I could search for it. It will be best to return to the castle and tell Sadden." Then he remembered that he couldn't ask his friend for help. "Oh no, that's not possible. As long as Sadden is..." Andrej didn't finish his sentence and went back to the castle. Alone.
*****
Exhausted, Sadden sat on the floor, silently regarding the statues of her family. Her mind that was fuzzy from the long time of abstinence began to clear somewhat, but her body was still weak. "Have I overdone it this time?" Sadden looked at her hands and turned them from one side to the other. "My skin is starting to disintegrate. I have to quench my hunger sooner than expected." Repelled by the thought, she remembered Madeleine. She wasn't willing to take another life only to preserve her own. For too many years, she had controlled the hunger and was determined to not relapse into a blood rage. Sadden had to find another way. Sacrificing a human was definitely out of question.
Gripping Lisander's statue for support, she pulled herself up and cast one last longing gaze at the figures of her lost family. "I will carry your love in my heart, where it is united with my love for you." She slowly made her way to the secret door, opening it with slight pushing against the wall. Swaying along the narrow corridor, the vampire left the castle. From time to time she stumbled, until she reached the castle's inner court. Exhausted, she fought her way to the parapet and supported herself on the cold stone. Her desperate eyes found the sky. "There is nobody here to help me and the night is almost over. I am too weak to walk the way on my own."
An idea struck her mind and her face brightened a bit. "He is my last hope. My trusty comrade, now I need your speed."
Sadden gathered all her strength to carry her weakened body down the stairs. She passed Andrej's tiny smithy, where the young man would sometimes do some forging, and went toward the open, wooden gate of the stables. Dim light of lanterns was visible from outside.
The vampire slipped through and was welcomed with happy neighing. To her right and left were the horse boxes, most of them empty. Next to the entry was a door to the saddle chamber and a ladder to reach the hayloft. Sadden staggered to the last and biggest stall in the back of the stable. Her face brightened even more as she looked through the bars.
Snorting and scraping his large hooves, the magnificent, white horse stood there, waiting impatiently for his mistress, his coat and mane gleaming like freshly fallen snow.
"Stardancer," Sadden breathed happily and entered his stall, careful of his unrestrained vividness. "Hello, my dear."
As Sadden wanted to gently stroke his muzzle, the stallion retreated."I know. I have been neglecting you. Please, forgive me, Stardancer. I really need your help right now."
He snorted heavily through his nostrils and butted her gently with his head in agreement.
"Thank you." She grabbed his long, silky mane and pulled herself onto his broad back.
High-spirited, he threw back his beautiful head, as if urging his mistress to finally leave the confining stable.
A small smile formed on Sadden's lips as her flat hand stroked his shoulder. "Alright, Stardancer. Let us go. The night awaits us."
The stallion didn't need to be told twice. At a fast gallop, they rode out of the stable, over the stone bridge and left the dark castle fading in the distance.
The velvety coat of the galloping stallion gleamed in the moonlight, his shining mane flew in the wind like fine mist, and his clear eyes sparkled like black pearls of the ocean. His stomping hooves dug deeply into the soft forest ground, while he flew through the night, until Sadden pressed gently with her thighs to make him slow his gait.
For Sadden it was a very strenuous trip.
Gracefully, the white horse pranced sideways, the nervousness of his mistress was apparent to the sensitive stallion. His muscles tensed beneath his velvety coat and his fearful neighing gave sound to his dismay.
"You can feel my desperation. I cannot lie to you." Fear was clearly written in Sadden's eyes. She was running out of time. "My elixir of life... blood."
*****
Meanwhile in the forest, Lilith had triggered and collected the wolf traps. She arrived at a small clearing, where the wolf hunters had erected their camp. All in all, there were five simple log huts with roofs of leaves and twigs. They had been set up in a circle around a big, open fireplace. Smoke from the camp fire was rising from it.
Carefully, the vampire stepped over the remains of the last drinking bout, consisting of beer mugs and empty bottles of cheap wine.
The big, gray wolfhounds, which the hunters used to find the wolves, kept resting and were silent in Lilith's presence. No bark or growl left their lips.
Smiling, she patted one dog's head and stroked another's long, shaggy fur.
Her smile left the instant she found a wolf hung up between two trees, blood dripping from his wounds. He was still alive.
Shocked, she hurried towards the animal and the traps slipped from her fingers. Lilith fell to her knees in front of him, running her trebling hands through the wolf's thick, soft fur. There was still a spark of life in the animal's amber-colored eyes.
Lilith swallowed hard as his eyes slowly closed. "Your will to survive is very strong. You don't have to fight anymore." The vampire buried her fingers deeply into the silver-gray fur beneath his head. Filled with pain, she also closed her eyes, bit down on her lip and released the poor animal from its torture. Then she untied the ropes that bound him and gently lowered the dead wolf to the ground. Hurt, she turned away from the sight, more determined than ever to fulfill her plan.
Lilith set up the wolf hunters' own traps right at the entries of their huts. "Vengeance. An eye for an eye, your rightful punishment for the pointless deaths of innocent. Doom shall befall you as you bring it to others." Thinking about the dead wolves made the blood race in Lilith's veins, her pupils turned to a fiery red. With unrestrained fury in her voice, she screamed into the night. "You shall suffer before you die, like you deserve!" Hidden by the shadows of the trees, the vampire watched the following scene with great delight.
Awakened by her outcry, the men, partly
still drunk and sleepy-eyed, stumbled from their huts and right into the traps, unprepared. Horrible screams of pain rang out, satisfying Lilith's thirst for revenge.
*****
Stardancer lifted his head. His ears turned in the direction where the camp lay. Nervously, the stallion scraped one of his fore hooves across the ground.
"Did you also hear the screams?" Sadden contemplated for a brief moment. With a slight press of her thighs, she directed her horse to follow the buzz of voices in the distance.
"He would make a handsome lad to quench my hunger," Lilith remarked inflamed, observing a scared young man, who was trying to flee in the confusion.
"You have earned the privilege to quench my blood thirst for tonight," she said and stalked him. It was easy to follow him through the forest. Delighted, she watched him stumble and trip over roots, saw him getting caught by thorns and observed his panicked attempts to scan his surroundings. He didn't really see anything. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead and trickled down his face, which was contorted by fear.
"So young," Lilith whispered like the wind in the tress. "And such a fierce heart."
Frightened, the boy retreated from the eerie flames.
In a safe distance, Sadden stopped her horse. Gasping, she slid off his broad back.
Taking in what was happening, she saw a boy stumbling through the undergrowth.
Lilith was hot on his heels. Suddenly, she hesitated and looked towards Sadden. The fire in her eyes faded. Surprised, the younger vampire went to her teacher. "He escaped."
Devoutly, Sadden's gaze was glued to her protégée’s lips, whose pointy eyeteeth retracted.
Lilith regarded her teacher, who was covered with bruises and slightly bleeding abrasions. She realized the critical situation Sadden was in.
Not missing Lilith gaze, Sadden sneered, "What are you suggesting? That I shall suck dry the whole camp just for your enjoyment?"
Chronicles of Darkness: Shadows and Dust Page 15