‘I could have guessed it would be one of the two.’ She gave a tight smile. ‘I’d better get on.’
‘Sure,’ Daniel said.
Amelia walked off and now it was Holly and Daniel who stood in strained silence but the fun of watching the glassblower do his work had now left them.
Daniel glanced over his shoulder to make sure Amelia had gone.
Holly saw that he did and misinterpreted it as Daniel craning his neck for one lingering look and suddenly she didn’t want to be here any more. She just did not want to stand beside a man whose mind was elsewhere. A man who couldn’t even be bothered to introduce her and described their morning as ‘Not much’. A man who listened to his voice messages from another woman straight after getting out of her bed.
He had come with a warning and, a little late perhaps, Holly chose to heed it.
It was time to put her big girl’s blouse on and remember just what it was that she had agreed to—a one-night stand and then they parted ways.
This wasn’t a date, no matter how much Holly wanted to convince herself of that. Neither was it the start of something. She’d agreed to abide by Daniel Chandler’s standards last night, which meant they should have been over with several hours ago.
She made it now.
‘I’m going to head off,’ Holly said. ‘I’ve got a lot to get and then I’m heading off to my parents’.’
‘Sure.’
‘Thanks for breakfast.’ Holly smiled.
‘You’re welcome.’
There was a very good chance that she’d never see him again, Holly knew that. And so how did you end it? she wondered. Did you say, Have a nice life? Did you kiss the other on the cheek when you went your separate ways? Or did you just give a sort of half-wave and then walk off?
Holly chose the latter.
CHAPTER FOUR
HOME.
Holly had rung ahead to say she’d be late and just before seven she exited the motorway and saw the lights of her village in the distance.
There was no sense of relief at being at her parents’, though. In truth, it had been ages since she’d had a full weekend off and it would have been nice to catch up with some friends. Or rather, given the turn of events, it would have been nice to spend a night in alone and watch a movie and dwell on what had happened with Daniel. Still, her mum wanted some help getting things ready for Christmas and so instead of being morose Holly waved to her mum as she got out of the car and smiled brightly as she headed up the path.
Inside, the tree was up and the decorations were all out, so her father had clearly been busy. Her mother went back into the kitchen to finish off making dinner and Holly went in to give her a hand.
‘We waited for you,’ Esther said.
‘I told you not to,’ Holly replied, because she’d told them to go ahead and eat.
The sound of the electric knife filled the room for a moment but when it went silent Holly knew that she ought to give her mother fair warning so she spoke. ‘Mum, there might be a change to the off duty over Christmas.’
‘I thought it had all been done.’ Esther turned and then looked at the calendar on the fridge. ‘You’re off from the twenty-third till the twenty-eighth.’
‘I was supposed to be but a couple of people have gone off sick and...’ Holly didn’t really want to tell her mum about Paul. Everything seemed to upset Esther these days and they all tended to tiptoe a little around her. ‘Well, Kay’s just not able to cover the department.’
‘Your brother’s going to be in Mongolia next year,’ Esther said. ‘I’ve got everyone coming...’
‘I know all that,’ Holly said. ‘And I’ll do all I can to be here but I had last Christmas and New Year off and we have to take turns. There are mums with little children and—’
‘Holly, I’m a mother and I want my family together this Christmas. Surely, given the year we’ve all had, that’s not too much to ask?’
‘I don’t do the off duty, Mum,’ Holly pointed out, but she could see that her mother was upset. So too was Holly. It had been a difficult enough day, without having to justify that she was needed at work, but Esther wouldn’t let it go.
‘Holly, they can’t just expect you to change your plans at the last minute...’
You do, Holly was tempted to point out, but she didn’t want to row.
Actually, she did.
Once they had been able to bicker, once Holly had been able to have a proper conversation with her mum, and she missed those times. ‘I’m going to take my bag upstairs.’
She did just that and back in her old bedroom Holly sat for a moment on her old bed and took in a deep breath.
Pollyanna indeed!
She wanted to go back down and speak her mind, which was that she was tired of walking on eggshells around her mother.
Holly was, in fact, tired.
Not just from a late night and long drive but from a very difficult year. Right now she had problems of her own. Okay, not major ones, but she was wrestling with last night and wondering if she might never even see Daniel again, but there just wasn’t a place for that now. Her mother had no idea what was going on in Holly’s life and lately never thought to ask.
She looked up as there was a knock on the door and saw that it was her father. ‘Your mum said that you might not be able to get Christmas off.’
‘It looks that way.’
‘Holly, I know they were good to last year but you know what Christmas means to your mum. Is there any way—?’
‘Dad, the charge nurse who was supposed to be working over Christmas had her husband go into cardiac arrest in front of her last night.’
‘Oh.’
‘Yes, “oh”. I want to be with my family at Christmas but so too does everyone else and Mum sending you up here to talk to me doesn’t change that. Everyone’s Christmas is important.’
* * *
Apart from the rather jumpy start it was a nice weekend. Holly went shopping with her mum and actually got rather a lot done, including ordering the turkey, but as pleasant as it had been, Holly arrived back at work more tired for her days off than when she had left.
There was no word from Daniel.
She hadn’t expected flowers or a phone call, or a follow-up date.
But she had hoped.
And those hopes had been dashed.
What part of ‘one-night stand’ don’t you get, Holly? she asked herself.
The ‘one night’ part.
How could something that had been so good simply end?
CHAPTER FIVE
HOLLY KNEW SHE shouldn’t take her coffee back to bed.
It was five-thirty and she started work at seven so really she should be hitting the shower, but instead she allowed herself one small luxury that was becoming a habit of late.
Not just for Holly.
The whole emergency department were thrilled with their Advent calendars.
It was the fifteenth of December, which meant that so far fourteen chocolaty delights had been eaten.
They had ranged from raspberry to mulled wine, from salted caramel to sticky toffee, and each was a masterpiece.
Every morning the staff all compared their treat.
Holly found the window that said fifteen and peeled back the little door and there it was—a little ball of chocolate with red and green dotted through it and dusted in icing sugar, and with a flurry of relish she popped into her mouth.
It was awful!
So awful that despite three chews waiting for the taste sensation to hit she ended up spitting it out into a tissue. It was glacé cherries and this sickly-sweet chocolate. It was so bad that, had that been the first day’s chocolate, none of the rest would have been opened and the calendar would have found its wa
y straight to the bin.
Grumbling, removing the taste with a mug of coffee, Holly headed for the shower and then took the underground to work.
She caught sight of her reflection in the window and saw just how drab she looked, especially given that it was so close to Christmas.
It wasn’t just her.
The department was rather gloomy.
Paul had at first rallied and been moved from Intensive Care to the coronary care unit, but just two days ago he had thrown off another clot and collapsed again. Now he was back on ICU on a ventilator.
It wasn’t just that, though.
Now that Daniel wasn’t around the days seemed longer and the run-up to Christmas, which Holly usually loved, felt just a little less, well, Christmassy.
Even the very thorough Kay was falling behind in her plans.
‘Holly, can you sort out the Secret Santa?’ Kay said as Holly took off her coat.
The underground had been packed, her boots had let in the rain and Holly’s mood was a touch frazzled, possibly down to the fact she had her period, but she’d kill anyone who suggested it might be that.
‘Nora usually does it...’ Kay sighed.
‘Sure,’ Holly agreed.
‘I’m going to have a cup of tea before we start.’
That sounded like a good idea to Holly.
‘Hey,’ Trevor said as Kay and Holly walked in with large mugs of tea. ‘Did you have your chocolate this morning?’
Holly pulled a face and nodded.
‘I still feel a bit sick,’ Anna moaned.
‘I think,’ Holly said, ‘that for the fifteenth one, the master chocolatier went on his break and left the work-experience kid in charge.’
They all laughed and then she startled because she recognised Daniel’s. Turning, she saw that he was sitting behind where she stood. He was eating toast and drinking tea and Holly’s heart told her to be wary.
This had the potential to really hurt!
‘I thought you’d left,’ Kay said.
‘So did I,’ Daniel admitted. ‘But try telling that to Admin. They called me this morning at six and asked me to come in. I’m only here till midday, though.’
Holly ignored him.
It had been twelve days since she had last seen him.
The Twelve Days of Absence, Holly now named them, and if he expected her to be smiling and peppy and, oh, so pleased to see him then he was mistaken. Instead, she drank her tea as she sorted out the Secret Santa.
‘What are you doing?’ he asked Holly, who had taken a seat and written out a list and was now tearing it up.
‘Secret Santa.’ Holly said, but didn’t look up, when usually she’d answer with a smile.
She didn’t know how to be around Daniel. They’d been friends who flirted before, now they were...what?
Ex-lovers.
Or was that too grand a word to describe them?
Not for Holly.
She had no idea as to his feelings, if any, for her, no idea where she stood in the scheme of things.
Probably nowhere.
But Holly wanted to find out.
The morning flew by and all were kept busy, especially as Kay took herself off to the office to wrestle with the dreaded off duty. The Christmas roster was the most awaited one of the entire year. Kay had tried to put it off as Nora had assured her she’d be back, but with Paul’s further deterioration it was now clear that wouldn’t be the case.
To have to change it at the last minute was not a decision that Kay had taken lightly.
And to forge the Secret Santa was not something Holly took lightly either. She just had to know how Daniel felt.
She slipped into the changing room and wrote ‘Holly Jacobs’, ‘Holly Jacobs’, ‘Holly Jacobs’ out about twenty times and screwed them up into little balls.
The original names she took out and placed carefully in the pocket of her scrubs and then added the duplicate copies of her own name to the envelope. Then she went out and found him checking results on a computer as Kay held out a form for him to sign.
‘Pick a name,’ Holly said, and waved the envelope under his nose.
‘I shan’t be here for Christmas,’ Daniel told her, ‘so there’s no point in taking one.’
‘Everyone takes a name,’ Holly said. ‘It’s all about getting into the Christmas spirit.’
Daniel rolled his navy eyes, which indicated what he thought of that, and got back to the computer screen.
‘Take a name, Daniel,’ Kay said. ‘You can drop it off on your way to the airport if you don’t work again. If you can’t manage that then I always have extras given half the staff are off for Christmas. It’s just a bit of fun.’
Daniel didn’t do fun.
Well, he did, but it was a rather more sophisticated type of fun he indulged in.
Not stupid Christmas-present swaps where people sulked if they didn’t get what they wanted or you forgot, but for the sake of peace he put in his hand and pulled out a name.
Holly Jacobs.
Of course it was.
He looked at her vivid green eyes and mop of dark curls that were, as always, coming loose.
‘You’re not allowed to say who you got,’ Holly told him. ‘Just stick within the price limit and put it under the tree. Usually we check when the name we have is working. So, say you had...’ she plucked a name out of thin air ‘... Trevor, well, he finishes up on—’
‘I get the drift,’ Daniel interrupted.
‘Good.’
Daniel got up from his stool and stalked off and Holly gave a little satisfied smile.
Now she’d finally know—if he got her something truly awful, or forgot completely, then she’d have to simply accept that he cared not a jot for her and it had just been a one-night stand. Maybe then she could turn off the fairy lights that were perpetually twinkling in her head when he was around.
‘I’ll take a name,’ Kay said, and reached out her hand.
Oh!
For all her plotting and scheming, Holly hadn’t thought of that. Kay was about to reach in and she had to come up with something fast.
Very fast! Because walking towards her was Anna, and she hadn’t taken a name yet either.
Holly suddenly had visions of twenty gifts all with her name under the tree and it would look a bit suspicious, especially as she was the one organising the thing.
‘Are you okay?’ Kay checked, as Holly whipped the envelope away.
‘No!’ Holly said, and did the only thing she could think of.
She fled!
And one lie led to another, it truly did, because she had no choice but to dash off to the staff loos and close the door behind her.
‘Holly...’ Kay followed her in and stood on the other side of the door. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘I just feel a bit...sick.’ Oh, she was the worst liar but at least Kay couldn’t see her blush as she quickly changed the names over. ‘A bit dizzy.’
She finally came out and Kay looked at her with narrowed eyes.
‘Do you need to go home?’
‘No.’
‘Thank goodness for that. Go and get a cup of tea and sit down.’
Oh, please don’t be nice, Holly thought, but she did as she was told and took a seat back in the staffroom.
Daniel appeared ten minutes later.
‘Kay said that you weren’t feeling very well.’
‘I’m fine.’
He grinned.
‘What?’
‘She’s decided that you’re pregnant.’
‘Oh, God!’ Holly groaned.
‘You’re not, are you?’
Daniel’s grin had, she noted, disappeared.
‘
No.’
‘You’re sure? I mean, I know we were careful...’
‘Shh...’ Holly looked around to be sure there was no one near. ‘There’s nothing to worry about.’
‘Well, if there was something to worry about...’
‘There isn’t.’
There wasn’t.
‘I’ve got my period.’
‘Is that why you’re in such a filthy mood?’ Daniel asked.
‘Nope, that would be the company,’ Holly said. ‘Don’t worry, Daniel, there are no repercussions for you to worry about!’ Holly gave him a tight smile and got up from her chair. ‘I’d better get back to work.’
Daniel stood as she brushed past him and he knew that Holly was wrong, there were repercussions from that night. Their friendship had changed. Gone was the easygoing banter and the little flirts and gone too was the lie that once they’d slept together he’d be over her, as was usually the case.
Oh, he could blame it on being half-asleep that he’d said yes when Admin had rung this morning to ask him to work, but it was more than that. And he could insist to himself that he was still in England because he had found out that neither his father nor Amelia could make Maddie’s nativity play this afternoon and so had decided to stick around for that.
He took out the bunched-up piece of paper from his pocket and read her name.
Holly Jacobs.
Yes, there were repercussions.
CHAPTER SIX
INDEED, KAY HAD pegged Holly as pregnant!
Before Holly could even make it back to the department, Kay had called her into the office for a little talk.
‘I’ve worked with a lot of young women in my time and generally when they’re dizzy and throwing up...’ She went into her pocket and pulled out a pregnancy test. ‘It’s better to face things.’
‘Kay, please.’
‘You can talk to me, Holly...’
‘I know that I can,’ Holly said. ‘But I’m not pregnant.’
As Kay held out the test, Holly refused to take it.
‘You’re not yourself, Holly!’
‘Kay, I’ve got my period...’
‘Well, it’s the mother of a period, then, because it’s lasted for two weeks. You’ve been awful,’ Kay said, and Holly gave a reluctant smile. ‘You can talk to me.’
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