"His scowl?" Orion laughed and I smiled a little too even though I knew how fucking crazy it sounded.
"Well...he doesn't really smile very often," I shrugged, closing my eyes against how goddamn mortifying it was to feel like that about a man I knew deep down I freaking hated. But somehow, with Orion I didn't mind. I knew he'd understand because he had been forced into a Guardian bond too. Though at least he loved the guy he was bonded to.
"Have you ever noticed how tall Darius is? And how strong he is?" Orion asked, a smirk playing around his lips. "Or how his eyes have little flecks of gold mixed in amongst the brown?"
"Yeah," I said, biting my lip as I thought about him. There was still a trickle of fear mixed in with the butterflies I felt when he crossed my mind and it was hard for me to figure out exactly what I was feeling there, but there was no questioning the way he looked. "He's pretty fucking nice to look at."
"And spoon with," Orion added with a grin. "One time while I was in Darkmore, I drew all of his tattoos from memory alone just because I couldn't stop thinking about them. And then I stuck the pictures to the wall beside my bed so I could kinda feel like he was there while I was sleeping."
We both laughed in a hopeless kind of way and I sighed as I leaned my head back against the couch and turned to look at him.
"I'm glad someone understands my fucked up thoughts," I said honestly because it was so hard for me to be dealing with all of these conflicting emotions for Lionel while everyone else just hated him so ferociously. And it wasn't like I disagreed, but I felt like such a fucking freak for secretly looking forward to seeing him tonight and wanting to hold him in my arms while knowing that was insane.
"We'll work this out, I promise," Orion said and I nodded because I knew that we would. Either by figuring out some way to break the bond or by Lionel dying - no matter how much the idea of that made me feel sick to my core.
"I didn't just come here to socialise," I said, sighing as I leaned forward and placed my empty glass down. "I actually came to warn you to expect a visitor in a little while through the tunnels.”
"Who?" he asked and I didn't miss the hopeful tone to his voice.
"Darcy," I confirmed. "Gabriel said it's important the two of us are in the palace tonight so after Lionel and Clara go to sleep, I'll sneak back out to meet her here."
"So...she's coming alone?" he asked, his throat bobbing as he glanced towards the kitchenette where Darcy had told me the tunnel emerged.
"Yeah. And if I come back here and find she's been crying, you'll be enjoying that flaming balls feeling. Got it?"
Orion shuddered, placing a protective cushion over his lap. "You're a savage."
"Damn right I am. Don’t go thinking I don’t mean it. Also…maybe you should get changed. I mean, it might make her feel a little better to see how much you’ve let yourself go, but I’m guessing you don’t want to broadcast what you had for dinner to her.” I pointed at the spaghetti stains on his sweatpants and he growled in frustration.
“I haven’t let myself go,” he complained. “I just dropped a bit of my food like five minutes before you showed up here.”
“Uh huh. So what’s the excuse for your shirt being inside out?”
He grabbed his collar and tugged it forward to check and I laughed at him as his eyes bugged out a bit.
“Asshole,” he muttered when he realised I’d been joking.
“Seriously though, did Lionel not leave you any scissors here? Because the homeless yeti look was never in fashion, dude. And Darcy definitely won’t be impressed by it,” I said with a smirk.
“Alright I get it. I’m a mess,” he growled. “But I don’t need relationship advice from you. You’ve got your own shit to work out.”
“Like what?” I asked, rearranging my flouncy dress as I tried to feign ignorance and he scoffed at my act, jabbing me in the arm.
“I’ve had Darius in my bed every night this week talking about you non fucking stop,” he replied. My gut tightened as I wondered if he was exaggerating or not and I couldn’t decide if I wanted him to be. “Maybe I should be kicking you in the junk too.”
“Maybe,” I agreed softly, not really knowing what to say about the Fae the stars had chosen for me.
“He’s a good man, Tory,” Orion said roughly. “Give him a chance to prove that to you again.”
I sighed, not really giving him an answer to that because I wasn’t sure what kind of answer I could give. I was so messed up over Darius that it was impossible for me to make any kind of decisions about him, let alone the fact that the rings in our eyes made those kinds of decisions pretty irrelevant anyway.
I glanced at the clock, seeing that it was five to eight and resisting the urge to start bouncing up and down at the thought of Lionel arriving soon.
“I need to go. Lionel is due back at eight and I'm equally dreading seeing him and so excited that I think I might puke." I released a dark laugh and stood, drawing on the shadows to help dull my nerves. If I was going to do this then I had to make sure my mask didn't slip.
"Look after yourself, Tory," Orion said, pushing to his feet and walking with me towards the door with a look on his face that said he really didn't want to let me leave, though we both knew I had to.
"You concentrate on being nice to my sister and I'll manage a dinner with the King just fine. Then I’ll be back once he’s asleep – Darcy will probably arrive before then.”
Orion’s face paled and he looked down at his spaghetti stain with a frown which made me snort a laugh as I started moving towards the door.
“Now you’ve just gotta decide, do you go with another sweatpants, t-shirt combo? Fancy it up to jeans? Or go all out with a suit and try to casually pretend you forgot she was coming and just happened to be wearing your fanciest shit,” I joked and his face fell.
“Fuck you. I wasn’t even thinking about that until you said it. Next time you’re meeting up with Darius I’m gonna get in your head over outfit choices too.”
“Good luck with that. Unlike you, I don’t give a shit what I wear. We’re not all so vain, you know?” I teased and he growled irritably.
“I’ll figure out some other weakness to exploit in you then,” he threatened.
“Well that’s easy enough. I’m all fucked up inside, so you can just play up to my insecurities about whether or not I’m even a fully functioning Fae anymore.”
“That’s not funny,” Orion muttered, shaking his head at me.
“I gotta laugh if I don’t wanna cry, right? Now if you don’t mind, I need to go cuddle up to the man who imprisoned and tortured me.” I started backing up towards the door but he caught my hand in his, squeezing tight as he met my gaze.
“We’re all at least a little fucked up, Tory,” he said roughly. “But the people who love us don’t give a shit about that. Better still – they love us even more for it.”
My gaze snagged on the friendship bracelet I’d made for him all those months ago and my heart felt full as I smiled at him.
“I missed you, asshole,” I said in a low voice.
“Missed you too, savage.”
We exchanged a look that was a clear promise for us never to speak of this sappy as shit moment ever again and he released my hand so that I could leave.
I headed back out of the summerhouse and into the palace, walking to the informal dining room where Lionel liked to eat. It was his only real option anyway seeing as the majority of the palace was still locked up tight and he couldn’t figure out how to break into any of the rooms. Which was fucking hilarious to me now that I could fully appreciate it.
My heart started pounding as I closed in on the room and when I heard the deep rumble of his voice beyond the door, I broke into a run despite my best intentions, bursting inside.
My gaze snapped straight to my king where he stood by the door and I leapt at him before I could stop myself, wrapping my arms around his neck and squeezing him tight.
"Ah, here she is," he purred in a smug voic
e as he wound one arm around me and tugged me against him. "My little pet."
Irritation prickled down my spine at that word, but it was tempered by the blissful relief of being reunited with him, and for several seconds all I could do was bury my face against his neck and breathe in the scent of him.
Someone cleared their throat behind us irritably and I turned to find Darius sitting at the table beside Xavier as they waited for us to join them. My gut plummeted and shame clawed at my insides, knowing he’d just seen all of that. I had to fight off a blush with a tug on the shadows that had my emotions dulling as they took hold of me.
Clara was in the seat to the left of the head of the table, dressed all in black and looking murderous as usual. I got the feeling she was holding Darius in his chair with her grip over his shadows as his jaw clenched and unclenched angrily.
"You see, Darius?" Lionel said in a voice that both made me want to throat punch him and stroke his lovely face. For fuck's sake. "Roxanya is thoroughly satisfied by her position beneath me. Aren't you, my dear?"
Lionel’s cold gaze turned to me and I forced myself to hold his eye, reaching up to touch his face - partly to sell the bullshit better and partly because I really wanted to for some fucked up reason - as my lips tilted into a soft smile. "I'm always happy with my king," I purred, possibly laying it on a bit thick but it was that or let him see how revolted I was at this gross bond he'd put on me.
Darius didn't reply, but the way his eyes flared told me he wished he could, and I had Clara to thank for the silence.
"Come and eat, Daddy," Clara begged, patting his chair at the head of the table and he tutted beneath his breath as he drew me towards it with his arm still wrapped around my waist, his hand just barely above my ass.
I was deposited in the seat beside Darius to the right of Lionel's chair before he sat down himself and I set my gaze on my plate as a prickle of guilt washed through me. This whole thing was so fucked up and Darius had had to endure weeks of this shit, watching Lionel parade me around while I flinched every time he came near me. And now, even after I was back in most senses of the word, I still had to take part in this show. I still wanted to on some level too and knowing how much that hurt him just made me feel like shit.
Before any of us could say anything else, the door opened once more and Catalina walked in, her arm looped around Vard's and her face pale. I stiffened in my chair despite my best efforts not to react, but now that I had my full memories of the things Lionel and his Seer had done to me it was hard not to show fear in their presence. My bond to Lionel made it easier with him, but the Cyclops was a different matter.
Clara seemed to forget all about keeping Darius in check as Lionel sat beside her, climbing into his lap and stroking his hair in a way that half made me want to kick her in the vag so that I could take her place, and half had me relieved that he was distracted. I could already tell this night was going to be exhausting as I battled through this yoyo of emotions I felt around Daddy Acrux and I had to suppress a groan as I looked down at my lap.
Lionel didn't seem to notice as he turned his attention to the serving staff who instantly appeared with plates of food, but Darius's fingers found mine beneath the table and he ran his thumb across the back of my hand.
My heart leapt and fear shot through my veins, but as Darius made a move to withdraw his hand, I caught his thumb to stop him.
My hand was trembling, part with fear and part with something much more exciting as I touched him. I slowly slid my fingertips across his calloused palm as I extended the contact between us and he ran his thumb up the inside up wrist, sending a trail of fire racing through my flesh.
Surely that wasn’t a normal reaction to someone half holding your hand, but I couldn’t deny how damn good it felt to just stay there like that. Knowing he had my back.
His touch sent a shiver of longing through my skin and I had to fight the urge to look at him as I tightened my fingers around his, keeping hold of him as my pulse settled a little.
Bowls of soup were laid out alongside freshly baked bread rolls and I chanced a look at Darius as his thumb stroked over my wrist again. His eyes were fixed on me, the rage burning in them all aimed at his father and making my heart race as I looked at it. It was impossible to see anything but the dangerous creature this man was as I peered up at him and yet for once, I wasn’t afraid.
My mouth suddenly felt endlessly dry and I wetted my lips as I found myself captured in his gaze while he seemed to be silently asking me what he should do. I knew that if I asked him to, he'd leap out of his chair and take his father on for me. But we also knew that between Clara's hold over the shadows inside him and the fact that I'd be compelled to place myself between Lionel and death, that wasn't an option.
Just as I felt like I might lose myself in Darius's eyes and the feeling of his hand in mine, the waiter behind me cursed as he dropped the bowl of boiling hot tomato soup he was trying to place before me. The bowl crashed into mine and Darius's hands, knocking them apart as bright orange soup flew everywhere and I sucked in a pained breath as it burned me.
Darius leapt to his feet with a curse as he got a lapful of it and Lionel snarled furiously, slamming a fist down on the table and snapping his fingers as he stole the oxygen from the waiter's lungs.
“What the hell kind of a way is this to serve food at the royal table?” he bellowed, making all of the waiters flinch in anticipation of his next move.
Clara leapt to her feet, cackling with glee as the clumsy waiter stumbled back, falling against the wall as he clutched at his throat in panic.
"Release him," Darius demanded, waving his own hand and using his water magic to gather up all of the spilled soup before depositing it back in the bowl. "It wasn't his fault, Father, I knocked his arm."
"He did," Xavier added quickly. "The waiter didn't do anything wrong."
"When I want the opinion of the talking horse, I will ask you to speak," Lionel snapped, casting a disgusted look at Xavier before lifting his soup spoon and beginning on his meal as the waiter continued to suffocate in the corner of the room.
"I said, release him!" Darius shouted, his fist thumping down on the table and making everyone's plates jump.
Catalina yelped in alarm and Xavier released a frightened whinny while Vard smiled like he’d already seen how this was going to play out. And if he was excited about it then I knew it could only be bad.
I looked between the dying waiter and Darius fearfully, forcing myself not to say a word despite how much I wanted to. Revealing the truth of my situation now would only make everything so much worse for all of us, but if Darius couldn't save the man's life then I didn’t know what I was going to do. I couldn't let him die. He'd only dropped the damn soup because I'd been holding Darius's hand and the stars had used him to force us apart in their fucked up way.
"If you are so concerned over the life of a servant then perhaps you would like to volunteer to take a punishment in his place?" Lionel asked, pausing with his soup spoon half way to his mouth.
"Fine," Darius gritted out, his jaw ticking with fury.
Lionel smiled cruelly and released the waiter without even bothering to look his way. His face had turned blue and blood vessels had burst in the whites of his eyes, but I was fairly certain he would survive so long as someone healed him sharpish. Two more of the wait staff hurried over to drag him from the room and I held my breath as Vard tittered a laugh and Lionel returned to eating his soup.
Darius slowly lowered into his chair and it soon became clear that Lionel had no intention of punishing him yet, drawing out the suspense as he focused on his meal.
I met Darius's eye for a brief moment, hoping he could see how sorry I was for causing that problem before forcing myself to eat my own soup.
Lionel didn't break the silence again throughout the starter and only spoke once the main course was well underway and we were all thoroughly terrified of what the hell he was going to say.
"Vard foresaw somethi
ng very troubling today, didn't you?" Lionel said finally and my gut tightened as I wondered what the hell his twisted Seer could have seen. Was he watching me closely? Was there any chance that he might know I was no longer fully under the control of him and his master?
"Yes," Vard said in that snivelling tone of his that turned my stomach. "I was blessed with a vision of a great library. One which holds more forgotten knowledge than we can even imagine."
"Where?" I asked, keeping my tone as neutral as I could.
"That's the problem," Lionel said in a tired voice. "It has been hidden away by yet another group of lowly Orders, trying to steal from their betters."
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Darius growled.
"You yourself know how conniving Sphinxes are, don't you, Darius?" Lionel mused. "After all, I heard you were screwing one not so long ago."
I had to fight the urge to wrinkle my nose at the reminder of him dating Marguerite and I focused on pushing my food around my plate, hoping no one was paying me much attention.
"She was trying to secure a position as your bride, did you know that?" Lionel asked with a disgusted laugh. "Her father actually had the nerve to come to me about it. He claimed you were in love and wanted to try and arrange a marriage for you. As if I'd muddy my lineage with blood like theirs."
"We should punish them for suggesting it, Daddy," Clara said excitedly and he gave her a small smile.
"I have even better reason to punish them than that," he said. "This library Vard saw held all manner of priceless tomes and artefacts, scriptures and knowledge long since lost to us. All stolen by Sphinxes and hidden away with the help of the Minotaurs."
"Minotaurs?" Xavier asked in confusion. "Why would they help to hide-"
Zodiac Academy: Fated Throne Page 32
