“Oh, I don’t think it needs explaining, Jason. It’s just that the other night one of my boarders heard one of your men talking about some of the things you’ve done with that bullwhip.”
Rachael felt a chill at the gleaming hatred in Jason’s eyes at that moment. His jaw was rigidly set in a mighty effort not to vent his wrath against Lacy in front of her. “I see no excuse to repeat such hearsay, Lacy,” he almost hissed.
She held his eyes boldly. “I think there is. I’ve taken a sort of motherly attitude toward Rachael. I just wouldn’t want to see her hurt.”
“I would never hurt her,” Jason spat back. “What I do in the line of duty and what I do with the woman I love have no relation. And I will thank you to stay out of it.”
“Jason—” Rachael rose, going to stand beside Lacy.
Jason drew in his breath, struggling for composure, watching them both. “You can’t believe the stories that come out of the mouth of a drunk man,” he said then. “I don’t know what your boarder heard, Lacy, but it was surely exaggerated. If I were stretching the law, I wouldn’t last long as a Ranger.”
Lacy grunted. “Depends who you pick to ride with you. Pick the right men and they’ll keep their mouths shut.”
Jason’s eyes glittered, and again Rachael saw a coldness in them that frightened her. “And certain other people should keep their mouths shut when they don’t know what they’re talking about,” he growled.
“Stop it, both of you!” Rachael demanded, looking distressed.
Lacy turned and patted her arm. “I’m sorry, honey. I guess I have a way of talking out of turn.” She looked back at Jason, grinning slightly. “Enjoy your tea,” she added before exiting the room.
In the next moment Jason grasped Rachael’s arms. “Rachael, I’m sorry. I don’t know what that woman heard, but the way she made it look—it’s not true, Rachael. I’m not mean and I don’t break the law.”
Rachael hunched her shoulders and pulled away, rubbing her arms as she turned her back to him. “What did she mean, Jason? What do you do when you go out on patrol?”
“My job, Rachael. That’s all. Just my job! And I’m damned good at it or I wouldn’t still be with the Rangers. Surely you know that.” He stepped closer, again putting his hands on her arms, moving them up to her shoulders and massaging them lightly. “Damn it, Rachael, I didn’t mean to be rude to Lacy, but she had no right saying those things in front of you, especially when it was hearsay from a drunk man. And especially when she knows I’m going away again.”
He kept rubbing her shoulders, using more pressure. He was trying to relax her, but Rachael sensed his desire to squeeze harder, felt his anger. She could not help wondering just how much anger and force lay behind the handsome smile.
“Let’s drink our tea and take a moment to think before we say anything else, Jason.”
She gasped as he yanked her close. “Don’t let that woman’s lies make you think less of me, Rachael,” he almost growled. “I love you! You heard me tell Lacy that, and now I’m telling you.” He pressed her breasts against his chest, moving his hands over her back. “I love you,” he repeated. “Can’t you tell me the same? Can’t I at least have a good-bye kiss, a little hope to cling to while I’m gone?”
“Jason, I—”
He did not let her finish her words. His mouth came down on hers forcefully in a solid, pushing kiss. She wanted to pull away, to hit him, yet hated constantly hurting him. She tried to enjoy the kiss and let it linger for a moment in order to see if that magical feeling would come. But she felt only revulsion as he moved his head, touching her lips with his tongue and pushing as though trying to get her mouth to open. There was nothing gentle about him, and Rachael knew in that moment what Lacy meant about how difficult life had to be for a woman who didn’t really want her husband physically.
She made a little whimpering sound and turned away. He kissed her cheek and her neck, apparently not even realizing she didn’t like the kiss. Rachael felt a hardness as he pressed himself against her thigh and she pushed him away.
“Jason, don’t!” She pulled away, quickly walking back to the settee, her breathing coming in quick little gasps.
“I’m sorry, Rachael,” he told her in a husky voice. “A girl like you, she has to get used to these things. If you’d marry me, Rachael, I’d go easy on you, I swear. I love you. I’d treasure you. You liked that kiss. I could tell.” He stepped closer and she kept her face turned away, amazed that he really thought she liked the cold, almost painful kiss. She put the back of her hand to her lips and he reached out and touched her hair. She jerked farther back, tossing the hair behind her shoulders.
“You had no right to kiss me like that. I didn’t say that you could kiss me.”
He just grinned, sitting down beside her. “A woman doesn’t have to say it, Rachael. When she belongs to a man, he takes what he needs, and after a while the woman learns how to enjoy it. That’s just the way it is, Rachael.” He reached out and took her hand. “Please—before I go away—please say you’ll marry me. At least say you’ll think about it.”
She met his eyes, her cheeks crimson. He seemed to have no conception of her real feelings, her revulsion. The hint of cruelty she had seen in those dark eyes moments earlier had again turned to the look of a little boy begging for a piece of candy. She sighed in resignation, turning and pouring some tea.
“Jason, I told you I just don’t have the kind of feelings I need for marrying a man. But I respect your own feelings and I don’t take your offer of marriage lightly, I assure you.”
She put some sugar into his tea and stirred it, offering him the cup.
He took the cup and watched her pour her own before lifting the cup to his lips.
Rachael knew it was not likely her feelings would ever change, but she hated sending him off with no hope at all. She drank some of her tea.
“I will think about it, Jason.” She relished the feel of the tea against her lips, as though the tea could somehow wash away his kiss. And to her surprise she suddenly thought of Brand Selby again—how warm and vibrant she felt in a quick moment from nothing more than a look. She turned to meet Jason’s eyes.
“What did Lacy mean—about the whip?”
He shrugged it off, rising. “I don’t even know. If it was true, I’d know what she was talking about.” He faced her. “I’m telling you the truth now that whatever it was, it was a lie—from the lips of a drunk man.” He put out his arms. “Look at me, Rachael. I’m just a man—a Texas Ranger. We live by certain codes. If I abused those codes, I couldn’t be a Ranger. And here I am ready to ride out again—maybe to get killed—and you’re worried about the lies of a drunk man, gossip handed to a busybody woman who is always trying to find out everything about everybody in town.”
He put his hands on his hips. “I’ll tell you what I use that whip for. It’s to help bring in stray cattle for settlers. And sometimes we’re riding in dangerous territory, where it’s not wise to shoot a gun for fear a band of Comanche will hear the shot and come after us. In those times I can use the whip to kill a snake, or grab up a squirrel or a rabbit for a meal. I’m good with that whip, I’ll admit that. But I don’t use it to hurt people. That’s what Lacy was trying to imply. My God, Rachael, do you really think I would do that? This is me—Jason—the man who has been coming to se you all this time with nothing but respect and patience—the man who goes out to check on your brothers for you.”
Rachael sighed and rose, walking closer to him. “I’m sorry, Jason.” She put her hands on his arms and leaned up to kiss his cheek. “There. It’s not the kind of kiss you want, but I’m sending you off with one anyway, and with a promise to think about marriage, all right? And I really will think about you and worry about you. I’ll pray that you come back safely. I wouldn’t want anything to happen to you, even if all we ever are is casual friends.”
He breathed deeply to keep from grabbing her up and kissing her again. How he wanted to do more! He took
hold of her arms, forcing himself to be gentle. “We’ll be more than friends, Rachael, I know it. You remember that I love you. You think real hard on it.”
“I will. I promise.”
He swallowed, studying her with eyes on fire with desire. “You watch yourself while I’m gone. Stay close to this place and don’t go shopping or to the school except in the brightest daylight. And don’t be wandering around after the sun goes down.”
“I won’t. Be sure to check on Josh and the boys for me.”
“I will.” He gave her a smile. “I have a feeling I should leave right now, while we’re on good terms. I’m heading out in the morning before the sun even rises.” He let go of her and walked into the hallway, taking his hat from a hook near the door. She followed him to the door and he gave her a smile. “Bye, Rachael.”
“Good-bye, Jason. God speed.”
He nodded, putting on his hat and going out.
Rachael stood at the door window, which was frosted with flowery designs. She peered through a clear section, watching him mount up and ride off, telling herself Jason couldn’t possibly be as cruel as Lacy had hinted. She turned and looked at herself in the hall mirror, touching her lips where Jason had kissed her. Then she turned and headed to her room. She wished she could respond to his desires. But not only did she feel nothing, she had actually suddenly thought about a total stranger, a half-breed, no less. For nearly three weeks she had tried to forget about that day at the river, but the memory, and the feelings it stirred, would not leave her.
Chapter Four
Jason slammed Jules Webber up against a wall, his hands grasping Webber’s shirtfront. “You stupid sonuvabitch!” Jason snarled. “It was you, wasn’t it? I saw you drinking over at the Bull Run yesterday. You shot your mouth off about me using that whip on the old Indian man, didn’t you!”
“I…I don’t remember, Jase.” Webber swallowed, staring at Jason with bloodshot eyes, his face sporting a stubble that needed shaving off. Jason jerked the smaller man away from the wall and shoved him into a chair. The two men were alone in the small building used for Ranger headquarters.
“You don’t remember because you were too drunk!” Jason clenched his fists. “I could kill you,” he growled. “And I just might do it! You know we can’t have people knowing things like that. We’ve got a good thing going here, Jules! Don’t destroy it by getting us knocked out of the Rangers! You want to lose that nice little nest egg you’ve got growing for you? You want to go back to Illinois where you’re wanted for murder?”
“No, Jase.”
“Then stay sober and stay out of the saloons! If we stay with the Rangers long enough, we’ll be rich men. Do you want me to refresh your memory on the plan? We work both sides, Jules. We keep the Indians stirred up so they steal women, supplies, cattle, horses—trade them to the Comancheros for rifles and the Comancheros take the stolen goods to Mexico to trade for gold they use to buy more guns, and make a tidy profit to boot. We look the other way and keep the trouble brewing, and the Comancheros pay us for silence and for letting them operate in our territory.”
Jason leaned close to Webber, resting his hands on the arms of the chair.
“You and your big mouth could ruin everything, Webber! We get caught, it’s all over. I don’t intend to mess up on this, Webber. I need the money to marry Rachael Rivers. I can’t give her everything I want on a Ranger’s pay, so you watch yourself after this or I’ll arrange to have the Comancheros take care of you. Understand?”
Webber’s eyes widened and the man swallowed. “You wouldn’t do that to a friend, would you, Jase? I didn’t say nothin’ about Comancheros or any of that.”
“Don’t say anything about anything! Just keep your mouth shut! And I don’t call a man a friend who shoots off his mouth and gets me in hot water with the woman I love.”
“I’m sorry, Jase. How was I to know it would get back to her?”
“People talk, you fool!” He sighed disgustedly and stood straighter. “I’m hoping not too much damage was done. We’ll be riding out tomorrow. Maybe being gone for a while will cause any gossip you might have caused to blow over. Besides, most folks don’t give a damn what happens to any Comanche, young or old. But if they suspected what we were doing, it’s us they’ll hate, not the Comanche! You want to hang, Webber?”
“No, Jase.” The much smaller man seemed to actually shake, and Jason turned away in disgust.
“If that happens again, Jules, I’ll let the Comancheros finish you off, I swear.”
“I won’t let it happen again. I promise.”
Jason moved around behind the desk. “Be ready to move out in the morning.” He sighed and sat down, putting his head in his hands. “I’m having a hard enough time getting Rachael to marry me, you bastard.”
Webber ran a hand through thick, greasy hair. “You ask her again, Jase?”
Jason leaned back in his chair. “I asked her. She’s at least thinking about it.” He closed his eyes. “I swear if she doesn’t say yes pretty soon I’m going to steal her away some night and take what I want by force. She’d learn to like it soon enough, especially when I show her all my money and how well I can provide for her.”
Webber grinned. “Just get her a fancy brass bed and build her a fine house. Break her in good and she’ll settle.”
Jason’s anger seemed to fade at the remark. “Yeah. I’ve won her brothers over. They probably wouldn’t object. I kissed her tonight, Jules. And I could tell that’s all she needs—just a little more kissing.”
Jules Webber laughed lightly and Jason finally grinned. He couldn’t imagine anything more pleasant than being Rachael’s first man. Surely that was all she needed. After the first time she’d settle down. She’d find out how pleasant and sinfully delightful it was to be with a man. Suddenly, his smile faded and he eyed Webber with renewed anger.
“Don’t you mess this up for me, Jules. I mean it.”
“I won’t, Jase. I won’t.”
“Go get some sleep. We move out early. And clean yourself up. You’re a Texas Ranger.”
Jules scratched his head. “I’ll go over to Katie Doogan’s place. MaryAnn will take care of me. She’ll do more than give me a shave.”
Jason finally grinned again. “Just make sure you aren’t up romping with her half the night. We can always have our pick of the women the Comancheros have along to trade to the Mexicans. I want you bright-eyed and bushy-tailed in the morning.”
“Sure, Jase. I will be.” The man turned and hurried out as though glad to get away. Jason watched after him, his thoughts returning to Rachael. Sometimes when he took one of the stolen white women the Comancheros captured, he envisioned it was Rachael squirming beneath him. He had been tempted many times to take her that way—against her will. But his pride wouldn’t let him. When he took Rachael Rivers, she would want him as much as he wanted her. He would make it happen somehow. Maybe when he returned from this trip she would be so relieved he was all right that she would fall into his arms and agree to marry him. The thought of it brought an ache to every nerve and muscle in his body.
Rachael tied on her robe and opened the door to her room. Lacy stood outside with a cup of hot chocolate.
“Still friends?” the woman asked.
Rachael smiled softly. “Of course. Come in, Lacy.”
The woman stepped inside, setting the chocolate on a stand. “I wasn’t sure if you were angry with me or not. You came straight up to your room after Jason Brown left. I’m sorry if I made things more difficult for you, Rachael.”
“Things would have been difficult either way.” Rachael sat down on her bed. “What on earth did you hear about Jason, Lacy?”
The older woman folded her arms and sighed. “Perhaps I didn’t have any right repeating something that came out of the mouth of a drunk man.”
“Father always said men usually speak the truth when they are drunk—say things they are afraid to say when they’re sober.”
Lacy nodded. “M
akes sense.” She studied Rachael a moment, true concern in her eyes. “Mr. Peters, the widow man, said while playing cards at one of the saloons in town, one of the other card players, a Ranger who rides with Jason Brown, joked about how Jason liked to use his whip on Indians.”
Rachael closed her eyes and lowered her head. “What made him even mention it to you?” she asked.
“He saw Jason coming to call on you again. He came into the kitchen and we just started talking. He only brought it up because he was concerned for you. We’re like one big family in this house, I guess. At any rate, he said he used that whip on some old Indian man who stole a calf. The other Ranger laughed about it like it was nothing, Mr. Peters said.”
“Oh, my,” Rachael sighed, rubbing her forehead. “When Jason came to my father’s place before he brought me to Austin, he said something to Joshua and the boys about taking care of some Indian who had stolen some calf. The way he said it—I suspected something cruel.” She shivered.
“Word gets around too much, Jason Brown will get kicked out of that job of his. Then again, maybe not. Most folks tend to look the other way when it comes to dealing out punishment against Indians. But if it’s true, it tells you what kind of man Jason Brown can be. And the way the man told it, if that Brand Selby hadn’t come along, Jason would have whipped the old man to death.”
“Brand Selby!” Rachael met Lacy’s eyes. “He was there?”
“Came along and stopped it. Don’t ask me how he managed to stop Texas Rangers without getting in trouble himself, but he did it. The way Mr. Peters says it, the Ranger talked like Jason is afraid of the half-breed. But he didn’t say why.”
Rachael rose, walking to the window. It was dark outside now, and she couldn’t really see anything. She stared at the lacy curtains. “Somehow I can’t imagine Jason being afraid of anyone.” She sighed deeply. “How strange. When I left here I had never heard of this Brand Selby. Now it seems the man keeps coming into my life—not directly, but in a kind of haunting, abstract way.” She turned and walked over to pick up the hot chocolate. “Thanks for thinking of me this way.” She sipped some of the warm, soothing drink. “Lacy, it’s almost a relief to know Jason is leaving,” she said after swallowing. “Isn’t that terrible of me?”
The Bride Series (Omnibus Edition) Page 43
