Glimmer

by Ashley Munoz

  Her voice had taken a bit of an 'I told you so' tone to it.

  I wanted to laugh at the obvious situation she was speaking of. I checked the aisle we were in to be sure we weren't blocking anyone.

  “Carla, you know that Ramsey just wants the best for you, right? I can understand why she might be hesitant about specific people or situations."

  Carla gripped her shopping cart and her eyes darted around; I could tell that she wanted to say something. She opened her mouth then shut it, then opened it again. “I know she worries, but she doesn’t understand how badly I want to see her happy before I leave this earth.”

  Tears started in her eyes and I had to look away, I didn’t deal with tears very well. Especially not from dying mothers thinking about their children. She wiped a few of them away and then continued, “Well anyway, I should be heading back…can’t stay out too long, or else I get tired. I need to rest up before my big bingo trip this weekend.”

  She said the last part with so much hope that it broke me a little bit.

  I smiled at her. “Well I hope you have fun this weekend, you deserve it.”

  I went to hug her again, and just as we were about to part ways, she stopped and half-turned towards me. “Oh, and Jimmy? Ramsey will be all alone this weekend. I would love it if you checked in on her. She won’t admit it, but she could really use a friend right now.” Then she waved and walked off.

  I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. I went to pull it out and found an incoming text.

  Ramsey: Sure, whatever you need, boss.

  I grabbed the kids from school on my way home. Once I was done, and the kids had put their stuff away, they both settled into the breakfast nook.

  “So Sammy, how was school today?” He was digging into a pile of peanut butter with an apple wedge.

  “Today was the best, Dad! Seriously, the best. We got to hold snakes in class today, and one of them was so big that the snake guy told us that it could eat our class hamster.”

  Sammy had one knee bent under him while he stretched his hands out, demonstrating just how big the snake was. I didn't particularly like snakes, but if my kid liked it, then I wanted to be happy for him.

  “Awesome, bud. Did you wash your hands after you touched them?” I asked, looking up from the meat I was browning. Sammy froze, and his eyes darted to either side of the room, in his very famous “Oops” face. I threw my arm up and pointed toward the downstairs bathroom. He hopped up from the table to go wash his hands.

  Becoming a dad turned me into someone I would have made fun of a few years ago. I would never have cared about touching snakes and washing hands, but now, as a dad, I cared. While Sammy was gone, I looked over at Jasmine and continued prepping dinner.

  “So Jaz, how was your day?”

  She was quietly eating her apple slices and staring at the table, which was her famous “I had a bad day” face.

  She took a minute but finally responded, “It was fine, have you heard from Ramsey? I want to make sure that she is still going to help me before the tryouts on Saturday.”

  Thankful I had cleared things up with Ramsey, I nodded my head, but realized she would probably need some words to attach to the nod. “Yeah, sorry, sweetie. She will be at work tomorrow, and I can check in with her. But I don’t think she forgot, she asked me about it on Monday.”

  Remembering that brief conversation, before she climbed into her car on the night she rejected me, made my neck feel tense. I looked over at Jasmine, and noticed that she was still silently eating her apples, and she looked worried. Poor thing, I knew she was panicked about the tryouts. I thought having tryouts for nine-year-olds was ridiculous. They seemed a little young to be that competitive, then again, I thought of some of those reality dance shows and realized how wrong I was. Still, I hated how nervous it made my little girl.

  Trying to improve her mood, I placed my hands on the counter and faced her. “Hey, I have an idea, Jaz. Why don’t we have one of our famous theatre nights on Friday, get your mind off things?”

  Right as I said it, Sammy ran back into the room. “Theatre night?!” he yelled, and then jumped back into his seat.

  I let out a little laugh at my spastic kid. “Yeah bud, let's do a theatre night. I heard there is a new superhero movie that came out. Or we could always do a classic; we haven’t done one in a while.”

  Jasmine had her elbows up on the table now, facing me. “Why not a princess movie? I never get a princess movie, Dad.” She wasn’t wrong, but there was a reason for it. I hated princess movies with every fiber of my being.

  Sammy jumped up on both of his knees now, hovering with half his body over the table. “Let's ask Grandpa and see what he wants. I bet you a million bucks he won’t want a stupid princess movie,” he yelled at Jasmine. She sat up tall, about to yell back, when I cut in.

  “Actually, Grandpa will be gone this weekend on his bingo trip, so it's just us.” I thought that would excite them, but of course, they both shrank in their seats, looking defeated.

  It was silent in the kitchen for a few glorious minutes while I finished preparing dinner, then Jasmine spoke up. “Is it the same bingo trip that Ramsey’s mom mentioned at the barbeque last weekend?”

  I kept my eyes on the meat that I was prepping as I responded, “Yep, the same one, sis.”

  She started kicking her legs back and forth in front of her, another one of her famous tells, that said, “I have a plan.”

  Sure enough, I heard a little cough from her, then saw her take a sip of water before she stood up. “If Miss Carla is going to be gone, then that means Ramsey will be all alone, won't it, Dad?”

  I didn’t like where this was headed. “Um, I don’t know, Jaz? She might have plans.”

  Jasmine eyed me as I kept prepping dinner, rubbing her hands on her jeans, and then kept going, “Well, let's say she is all alone. Wouldn’t it be nice to invite her to our theatre night?”

  Crap.

  This was all Sammy would need; he was like a dog with a bone when people put fun ideas in his head, and he wouldn't let go until you either yelled it out of him or gave in. Sure enough, his eyes got big, and he jumped off the bench and ran up to where I was standing.

  “Yes, please, please, please. Invite her, she will come, I know it. She likes us, Dad.”

  He was hanging on my arm now, as I tried to keep working on dinner. I knew my kids well enough to know that they weren’t going to give up. I faced them both and held my hands up in surrender. “Okay, here's the deal. You kids make her an invite. On it, put the movie we are watching and what time, and I will hand it to her at work tomorrow. That is all I can promise, okay?”

  They both nodded their heads and ran upstairs in search of craft supplies. Something told me this was going to be yet another Ramsey-filled weekend.

  It was Friday, and my temporary banishment from Jimmy's was finally lifted. I could be immature about the fact that Jimmy had frozen me out all week and stuck me at Sip N Sides as some sort of emotional punishment, but I chose to rise above it. After all, Sip N Sides was a part of my job. Thinking back over the last few days at Sip N Sides, it was actually quite fun.

  I had walked out to the bar area to grab a soda when I gently mentioned, "You know, these bar stools are nice." I walked over to the duct tape-covered stools to make sure I landed my next point. "Except, I actually overheard some customers talking about how they had to pick some duct tape residue from their pants the last time they were here."

  Theo's eyebrows drew together as he walked over to check out the object in question. Sure enough, he moved towards the other barstools, inspecting each one as he went.

  "Darn it. This duct tape has gotten a bit out of control, hasn't it?" he asked, taking a few steps back to get a better view of the seating area.

  I ran my hand along one of the padded seats. "Yeah, I think it might be time to swap ’em out." I briefly looked up to catch Theo's face as I said it. Surprisingly, he looked thoughtful as he ran his hand over his light b
eard.

  Encouraged, I kept going. "In fact, I was just looking on this website and saw a few ideas for Sip N Sides, would you want to see them?"

  Theo let out a sigh, put his hand out, and said, "Lead the way."

  That's how our week went, and exactly how I managed to talk him into not only upgrading the bar seats, but the carpet and a few of the light fixtures as well. I showed him how cost-effective we could be, and how little of a dent it would put into Loretta's money if he chose to upgrade. Best of all, I showed him how Sip N Sides wouldn't turn into Jimmy's fancy place, simply by investing a little money into it.

  However, as much as I loved designing and shopping for Sip N Sides, I was ready to get back to actual work. Jimmy's really did need my help and God only knew how much worse things had gotten over the last few days.

  I was pulling my black V-neck sweater over my head just as my mother walked into my room; or rather, barged in. She didn’t have much of an opinion on privacy, except that kids who lived in her house shouldn’t have it. I straightened my sweater and faced her. She was holding the door with one hand and a small suitcase handle in the other.

  “I just wanted to say goodbye before the van came to pick me up. I wanted to remind you to please reach out to Jimmy if you need anything this weekend.”

  I held back the urge to roll my eyes at her and just smiled instead. I guess me living on my own since college held no weight in her eyes.

  “Mom, I promise to reach out to Jimmy if I need anything, but I was thinking about maybe going to visit Laney this weekend, since you were going to be gone.”

  I walked over to my closet and grabbed some boots, then glanced back at her. She faintly smiled, then moved both hands to her suitcase. “Just be careful, sweetheart, with whatever you decide to do. And remember that your life on this earth is limited, so enjoy it, and I hope you have fun.”

  I was shocked. No matchmaking scheme, or lecture on meeting someone and making her grandbabies before she died? My mom might need to get out more often, if she was going to be this agreeable. As soon as that thought entered my mind, so did a big batch of guilt. What if something happened? What if I missed something?

  I turned away from her, so she wouldn't see my conflicted emotions. She'd be fine. This was her choice and it was good for her.

  Turning from the closet, I stepped forward and wrapped her in a hug just as a horn honked outside. Mom patted my back and grabbed her suitcase, then walked out. I trailed after her to make sure she didn’t need any help and to make sure that whoever picked her up was actually young enough to drive; crazy world we live in when that started making a difference.

  Outside, a big white fifteen-passenger van was in our driveway, and Theo himself walked up to the house to grab Mom’s suitcase. He smiled at me and then winked, reminding me not to worry. I thought of his words from the day before, to “take this weekend and let go.” I knew that he didn’t mean it in a “wet and wild” kind of way, but a “find your peace” kind of a way. I smiled back at him, hugged my mom one last time, and then watched as she took her spot in the van.

  Once she took off, I jogged back inside, noticing that it was getting close to eight thirty. I was going to be late if I waited any longer. I threw on my black knee-high boots and grabbed my coffee, heading out just as my phone rang. I fumbled my way to the car, answered, and put the phone on speaker.

  “Ramsey Lenae Bennington, you still haven’t answered me about Thanksgiving, and more importantly, you told me that you would come to visit me this weekend!” my best friend half-yelled, half-panted into the phone. Knowing her, she was probably in midtown, walking to her office.

  “Laney calm down," I started to scold her. "First of all, it's only September—"

  "Mid-September. Mid, Ramsey," Laney cut in. I slowly brought the SUV to a stop as I waited my turn. The clicking from the turn signal in the car was the only sound as I chose my next words wisely. It wasn't wise to argue with Laney, and it wasn't wise to get her riled up before work. These were just little facts about who Laney was. She was my best friend and I loved her dearly, but she was ferociously competitive. It came from her being raised with four older brothers. It might also have something to do with her being a redhead, but I have no idea if there's factual evidence in that or not. I still blamed her brothers. They weren't just regular brothers either. They were the kind that would prank you in the middle of the night, and then film you waking up in it.

  "Fine, it's mid-September," I agreed, as I drove towards the outskirts of town, before I gently tried to explain my delay in scheduling. "Secondly, I am considering this weekend. I just want to be done with work before I make any final decisions, and I haven’t really had a chance to double-check my calendar.”

  She laughed, the whore. “Ram, come on. I'm your best friend, and it's been three months since I've seen you." The eye roll was evident in her tone.

  "Lane, I know, trust me. I want to come see you. I need to see you and Chicago, I miss you both equally, but I still need to check." I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was forgetting something important.

  “Okay, fine. Just call me when you know, okay!”

  I let out a silent breath that I had been holding. “You got it, Vainy Laney, I will call you soon.”

  I didn't like letting people down, especially her. Laney was more like a sister to me, so our relationship looked much different than regular friendships. We were allowed to be our true selves, no matter how ugly or tainted. We always forgave each other, and eventually moved past any indiscretion the other made because we considered each other family. I even spent Christmas with her entire family, two years ago, and fell victim to a few of her brothers’ pranks. Which is why I now sleep with a flashlight and bug spray near my bed.

  I was on the highway to Rockford now, and my mind had circled back to Jimmy. I decided that I would devote the drive to getting my head in the emotional game that was taking place between me and Jimmy. Hopefully, he figured out that he was being stupid, which is why he asked me to come back, or he just needed me to do my job. Regardless, I still couldn't date him, and I wouldn't. No matter what, things between us would need to balance because I was in no position to date. My head felt clearer at my declaration, and I was proud of myself for making a stance.

  I turned into the complex, where Jimmy's bike was already parked, and my adrenaline spiked at the sight of it, which proved that my thirty-minute focus session did absolutely nothing for me. That's okay, I would try again, and focus solely on starting work and getting my hands on invoices and receipts. I would try as many times as it took to get Jimmy out of my head.

  I walked confidently down the hall until I landed in front of the manager door. I paused, deliberating only for a moment whether to knock or not, before grabbing the handle and pushing it open. This was my office too, and I didn't need to knock. Jimmy sat at his desk, his laptop open in front of him. He wore a Cubs baseball hat and a long-sleeved, blue shirt. He looked like he was headed to a ballgame.

  Once I made my way to his—or, our—desk, he looked up at me and gave me a kind smile that spread to his green eyes. “Hey Ramsey, how are you today?”

  I am confused and frustrated, and lately, I've been secretly writing Stenson at the end of my name.

  “Oh, not too bad, how are you?” I said, as I settled into the only other chair in the office. “Good, just gearing up for the weekend, actually. I am taking off today around

  noon.” He said the last part while looking down at his computer. I began pulling my computer out as well.

  I felt a little odd, like maybe he only asked me to come back because he was going to be gone. I wondered if this was going to be our working relationship now? My stomach sank at the thought. “Well, sounds like you have a big weekend planned,” I rattled off, as my computer powered up.

  He looked back up at me, “Yeah, nothing too big, just trying to get Jasmine in the right headspace before her big tryout on Saturday.”

  I froze. My heart may
have even stopped. How could I have forgotten about her?! I mentally scolded, kicked, and maimed myself for forgetting about his beautiful daughter’s big tryout day. Thankfully, he was looking down at his computer and hopefully, that meant he just missed everything that went on in my head that might have made its way to my face.

  I slowly let out a silent breath and responded calmly, “I bet she is so excited, but so nervous. I was actually going to talk to you today about what time I could pick her up Saturday to do our pampering thing?”

  Hopefully, I saved that. Please, dear God let me have saved that! I carefully watched his face while trying to seem uninterested in anything that had to do with him. He sat up suddenly, then reached down into a bag on the floor.

  “Actually, Ramsey, I have something for you from the kids.” He handed me a white piece of paper that was folded in half. It had blue and red construction paper cut out and glued to it, to make it look like a giant movie ticket. I opened the paper and inside, I saw six-year-old coloring and nine-year-old handwriting.

  “You're Invited to Theatre Night!

  We’ll be watching an Adventurous Princess Movie

  Time: 6 PM

  When: Friday night

  Where: Our house

  From: Love Jasmine and Sammy

  P.S- Please come

  P.P.S- Pleasssssssssssssssssssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeee Come.”

  I couldn’t contain the laugh that had built up in my chest. Those kids were the sweetest thing on the planet and I didn’t deserve them, especially not after I forgot Jasmine’s tryout. I had to go, just to mentally make up for the fact that I forgot her. I folded the paper in half and stuck it into my purse.