Not to mention, he was now my boss, and I’d already dealt with a difficult boss at Mama’s café. What if I’d just traded one bad boss for another? I couldn’t stop second-guessing my decisions, and one worry after the next escalated until I felt like I was losing my mind. It was like a row of dominoes. Once the first fell, the entire row followed.
The pilot spoke a few words over a loudspeaker and everyone put their seat belts on. I was sitting in an aisle seat next to Leslie, her copper-colored hair falling just below her ears. She appeared to be somewhere in her late forties, possibly early fifties. Sam sat on the other side of her, appearing calm and relaxed like flying was no big deal to him. Gritting my teeth, I closed my eyes and braced for take-off.
Leslie chuckled. “Get a grip on yourself, honey. Just relax. You’re being childish. The way you’re acting right now is downright funny.” She had a raspy voice, like someone who’d smoked cigarettes for a long time.
She barely knew me, so I wasn’t sure why she’d spoken as if she did. A lot of adults were afraid of flying, so childish wasn’t the word I would have used.
“It’s not funny,” I said. “And I’m not laughing.” If I was being childish, I couldn’t help it. I was doing my best to cope.
“If you saw your face right now, you’d have a good laugh.” She sat up taller. “I’m not afraid of anything. That’s just the type of person I am. Some people live in fear their entire lives but not me. I guess I’m just a strong woman. Not everyone can be like that.”
Before we’d boarded the plane, I’d shared my fear of flying, but, now, I regretted sharing something so personal. We all had weaknesses. Flying just happened to be one of mine.
I felt completely out of control as the plane taxied forward. My pulse picked up and my breath came in short spurts. I couldn’t inhale fully, and it seemed like the oxygen going to my head was slowly dissipating. The plane sped up and there was a bit of pressure as it lifted off the ground and flew at an incline. I clenched the armrest, and every muscle in my body tensed. I kept my eyes closed and wouldn’t open them until we leveled off.
There was some turbulence, but it didn’t last long. It should have made me feel better to know the takeoff part was over but it didn’t. At least I had a seat next to the aisle, but I still felt an uncontrollable urge to move to a spot where there was more space. A panicky sensation stirred in my chest now that we were up in the air. How far up were we? Everything began to feel as if it was closing in on me, and my body broke out in a sweat.
“Are you okay?” Sam asked, looking at me with a concerned expression.
I couldn’t speak, so I just nodded, hoping that was enough. My hands fell to my knees, and I tightened my grip on them, trying to pull myself together, trying to breathe in and out, in and out. But the more I tried, the worse it got. My head felt dizzy, and my heart wouldn’t stop racing. Taking note of my body’s reactions only escalated the problem even more.
Leslie laughed. “Time to grow up, little girl. Don’t you know that more people die in car accidents than in planes?”
She had this rough way of speaking, and I sensed she wasn’t trying to be mean, but I was in no state to deal with it today.
She laughed again, and the sound was grating. “If anything, claustrophobia is a bigger issue than the actual flying part. Being in such a small space for hours on end without being able to get out—”
“Leslie, that’s not helping,” Sam said.
I wanted to hug him for that, but it would have to wait.
“Just take a deep breath, Aria,” he said.
I nodded quickly. “I’m trying.”
There was a sudden burst of turbulence and the plane dropped and then steadied itself. My heart was in my stomach and my breath came out fast, almost like I was hyperventilating, but, I wasn’t at that point quite yet.
Leslie covered my hand with her own. “My goodness, your hand is so cold.” She smiled. “Look, honey, it’s simple. Just think about your family and how they’re waiting for you at home. That’s what I do when I’m upset.”
“Leslie,” Sam said with an edge to his voice, but she ignored him.
“I think about the people who love me, and how I’m not alone in this world.”
“Leslie,” Sam said more urgently, tapping her on the shoulder.
She glared at him. “Stop it. I’m trying to comfort Aria right now.”
He opened his mouth to say something, and she put a finger over his lips to shush him. She was a little too pushy for my taste even though I was sure she meant well.
She turned back to me. “In fact, I bet your people are praying for you and thinking good thoughts at this very moment.”
“Okay, I’ll try to remember that,” I said, hoping that would be the end of it and she’d stop talking. An ache settled deep in my chest. I wasn’t overly sensitive, and I didn’t usually have a problem talking about my family, but the stress of this situation made every nerve ending in my body more aware.
“I’m sure your mom wouldn’t want you to behave this way,” she continued.
I’d never known my mom, but that didn’t mean I never thought about her. Dad had shown me pictures, and I looked a lot like her. Not having a mother growing up had been hard. Dad tried to compensate, and he’d done a good job most of the time, but no one could ever replace a mother.
“I’m sure she taught you to face your fears,” Leslie said, nudging me with her elbow. She wanted a response from me, but I wouldn’t look at her, just kept my eyes in front of me. Please stop talking about my mom.
Leslie leaned closer, crowding me, and the tiny space felt even smaller. “Toughen up. The world is a difficult place. Flying on a plane is the least of your worries.”
I held back what I wanted to say and tried to keep my temper in check. If she only knew what I’d been through, she wouldn’t have said that. She was a well-meaning lady with an out-of-control tongue. I closed my eyes and told myself that over and over.
“Leslie, can I have a word with you?” Sam asked. “How about if we take a walk?”
She looked at him like he was crazy. “We can’t just—”
“The seat belt light is off,” he said.
“That’s not what I was going to say. We can’t just leave Aria. She needs us right now.”
Poor Sam. He was trying, but Leslie wasn’t getting it. Every word she said was like a crack in a glass window. A few more cracks and the whole thing would break.
“It’s okay,” I said. “Go with Sam.” Please.
She shook her head. “Nope. Not going to do it.”
Normally, I had no problem telling people to back off, but in this situation, I felt like I was barely coping. It was taking all my energy just to sit still and not have a full-blown panic attack. Dealing with Leslie was something I couldn’t handle right now.
She leaned in and her lips were too close to my ear. “Listen sugar, I think I know what this about. You’re homesick. A big hotshot hired you to clean his house in a part of the world you’ve never seen, and you’re probably wondering if it was the right decision. Well, let me tell you, it is the right decision. Mom and Dad have to let their little girl grow up. I had a hard time letting go of my son, but once I did, he was able to spread his wings and fly.”
Her words left a bitter taste in my mouth. After Dad died, I’d had to grow up too fast. Moving from foster home to foster home, and losing my brother, the only family I had left, was the one of the hardest things I’d ever had to deal with. I didn’t need a speech about spreading my wings. I didn’t need to hear that my mom and dad had to learn to let go—they already had.
The weight of my anxieties, and, now, the grief over losing my family felt almost unbearable. Many times over the years, I’d felt alone, but sitting here with Leslie, hearing her talk about family like it was something everyone had—it shattered me.
My father and my brother were always in my thoughts, but they were both gone. They weren’t available to me—no one was. Tears
streamed down my cheeks, and I couldn’t contain myself any longer. A sob broke loose and my breathing shuddered as I tried to hold it in. I put my hands over my face and leaned down towards my legs, hoping the world would disappear around me.
“All right. That’s enough,” Sam said.
I heard his seat belt unclasp, and then he was standing next to me, a hand on my shoulder. “Aria, come with me, honey.” He spoke softly, and when I glanced up, his eyes were full of empathy.
I didn’t ask questions, I just got up and followed him. At that point, I would have done anything to get away. He led me to the front of the plane where the curtain separated Lucas from the rest of us.
“Wait here,” he said.
Nodding, I wiped my face with my hands. I had no idea what was happening. Maybe I was in trouble. Maybe he was telling Lucas I was a problem, but I sensed Sam wouldn’t do that to me.
He stepped out a few seconds later. “I informed Mr. Armstrong of the situation, and he’s more than happy to let you sit with him.”
My eyes widened. “Oh, I couldn’t do that. He obviously wants to be alone. That’s why he’s behind the curtain.”
The curtain drew back and Lucas stood in front of me, eyes blazing as he took in my tears. “If I had known you were back there crying . . .” He shook his head and mumbled something I couldn’t make out. “Come with me.”
Sam patted me on the shoulder and left, and Lucas took me by the arm and brought me to a seat that looked like a recliner. It was attached to another recliner, so when we both sat down, we were only inches apart.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked.
“No.”
He nodded slowly. “Then you don’t have to.” He appeared to debate within himself, and then he made eye contact with me. “Come here. Lay your head on my shoulder. Try to get some sleep.”
He lifted up the arm rest that separated us, and I didn’t think twice about it—I scooted closer. Maybe I should have considered the consequences, but I was so overcome with heartache and anxiety that I took his comfort without a second thought. I settled my head on his firm shoulder, and the warmth of his body soothed my troubled mind. His other arm came around me, and he pulled me tightly to himself. For the first time since I’d gotten on the plane, I felt safe.
He didn’t say anything else and neither did I. It didn’t take long for me to fall asleep, wrapped in the cocoon of his arms.
Chapter 7
Lucas
Normally, I tried to fall asleep whenever I flew anywhere but, today, that was impossible. I was so wound up I couldn’t relax.
And that was Aria’s fault.
The moment I saw her quirky smile this morning as she waited for me in the car, my entire mood lifted. It was like someone slipped something into my coffee, and I couldn’t stop smiling. But then I remembered the purpose of this trip and everything soured. I wasn’t flying to Kauai to get to know Aria. I was flying to Kauai to court Hillary. To convince her to marry me.
That was when I knew I had to draw a line in the sand and keep my distance from the woman with the long black hair. The woman who’d kept me up late last night, wondering if she’d accept my job offer.
When she’d texted at exactly ten to tell me she wanted the job, a shot of adrenaline had coursed through me and maybe some fear as well. I wanted her to take the job, but I also wanted her to decline. That would have been the easier route. I wasn’t too proud to admit I was drawn to her a little. But that was where it needed to end. There was no point in spending time with her if it was going to distract me from my goal.
But when Sam interrupted my rest to inform me that Aria was having anxiety over flying, and Leslie was making it worse, I knew I had to do something. That Leslie spoke out of turn didn’t surprise me. She spoke her mind too freely sometimes. I’d had some issues with her before, and I’d nearly let her go a few times, but I used to hate it when my father fired people left and right. I didn’t want to be like him. He had no loyalty to his staff whatsoever. No loyalty to anyone period. I didn’t want to be like that.
I glanced down at Aria asleep in my arms, her light breathing right next to my ear, the scent of her floral shampoo filling my nostrils. It was impossible to concentrate on anything but her. Maybe it wasn’t her fault. Maybe it wasn’t mine either.
But this was the hopeless situation I found myself in.
And I couldn’t stop looking at her, the way the light caught on her face, the way she was tucked into my side like she belonged there.
She didn’t belong there.
And I knew it.
But I wasn’t letting go . . . not yet.
When the plane landed, I would distance myself from her so I could start focusing on Hillary. I was good at keeping people at arm’s length—it was a skill I’d mastered well. Aria would take the hint. But right now, I didn’t want this to end, whatever it was.
She stirred and opened her eyes, appearing almost startled. I didn’t loosen my arm right away. That would have been the gentlemanly thing to do, but no one had called me a gentleman in a while. Maybe it felt too good holding her like this. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had my arm around a woman. I wasn’t one for showing affection. But I had to admit, it was kind of . . . nice.
She didn’t try to move away either, and for a moment, we just stared at each other as if we were trying to figure out what to do next. Her eyelashes fluttered and the corners of her mouth tipped up like she was attempting to smile.
“Hi,” she said.
“Hi.”
My eyes trailed the smooth contours of her face, the creamy skin that looked soft, touchable. I found myself wanting to run a couple of fingers down the side of her cheek to find out if I was right. But that would have been going too far, so I removed my arm from around her and scooted away, creating some distance. “Looks like you got a little sleep. Feeling any better?”
She nodded. “Yeah, I do actually. How long did I sleep?”
“About thirty minutes.”
“That’s it?” She looked disappointed. “I was hoping I’d slept through most of the flight, and we were almost there.”
I chuckled. “Nope. We still have hours to go. Wish I had a time machine and could whip us past this but—”
“I have to suffer through it. I know.”
“It hasn’t been too bad so far, has it?”
“Uh . . . it was pretty bad back there. I thought I might have a breakdown. I’m not sure why, but I feel safe with you.” She smiled as if it was the most normal thing in the world to say.
I stilled, the muscles in my back tensing up. No one had ever said those words to me before. I feel safe with you. Alarm bells went off in my head.
She shouldn’t feel safe with me.
I wasn’t safe.
Not that I would ever hurt her . . . physically. I would never do that. But I had a way of hurting people emotionally. It was just who I was. I was that kind of man, my father’s son. He’d trained me to be callous, even brutal at times.
I lifted an eyebrow. “How do you know I’m not a wolf about to gobble you up? Maybe you shouldn’t jump to conclusions so quickly.”
“Are you a wolf?” she asked.
“If I was, do you think I’d tell you?”
She smiled like this was a joke. “Probably not.”
But it wasn’t a joke. I was dead serious. “You should be more careful. Just because I invited you in here with me doesn’t mean you should let down your guard.”
“I think it’s too late for that. I already fell asleep on your shoulder.”
“Maybe I’m waiting for the right moment to strike.”
“You should rethink that unless you want to end up doubled-over, lying in a ball on the ground with the worst pain you’ve ever had.”
She said all of that in one breath and then shot me a goofy smile. It was so playful and lighthearted, I burst out laughing.
“That’s . . . an interesting image you just gave me. I didn’t know
you were such a tough girl.”
“Oh, I learned how to take care of myself. Believe me.”
“Self-defense classes?”
She shook her head. “I never took a class, but there was a guy on the street who taught me a few things.”
“A guy on the street . . .” I emphasized each word like it was a riddle. “So, you just happened to run into some guy?”
She continued to smile, but her body tensed the slightest bit. “Yeah, he was willing to help me out.”
I stared at her for a long moment trying to figure out what she was talking about. “How did you convince some random man to teach you self-defense moves?”
“We were both living on the street at the time,” she said carefully, watching for my response. “Thankfully, he was one of the good guys, and he thought I should know how to defend myself.” She glanced away, running a hand over her hair self-consciously.
“Living on the street. What does that mean exactly?” I wasn’t dense. I just wanted to make sure I’d heard her right.
“It means I was homeless.”
My jaw tightened. The idea of her homeless . . . My fists clenched. That shouldn’t have happened. I brought my gaze back to her and saw the hurt in her eyes. She thought I was judging her, but I wasn’t. I wished I’d known her back then, so I could’ve helped her.
My chest squeezed as I pictured her alone, running into all kinds of strange characters. For some reason, thinking about it made me angry. Made me want to break something. She shouldn’t have put herself in a position like that. Terrible things could have happened.
“Why were you living on the street?” There was an edge to my voice, and I knew I shouldn’t jump to conclusions, but a protective feeling rose up in me and I felt like I had to make her understand . . . She needed to take better care of herself.
She shifted in the recliner and crossed her arms. “Because I quit my job and couldn’t find another one. I couldn’t pay my rent, so I got evicted.”
The Ruthless Billionaire: A Clean Billionaire Romance (California Elite) Page 5
