Travis let the change take him, and all the worries and concerns began to recede as the wolf took over, but he stopped just off the porch and looked back through the kitchen window.
Mate.
Mine.
Safe.
His mate stood there, with her back to the other female in the room. Her hand came up and brushed at her cheek, then she briefly covered her eyes and took a deep breath before turning around.
He sensed the others turning back to look at him in question.
An Alpha didn’t second-guess his choices. An Alpha was firm and always in control. With a howl, he took the lead and bolted into the forest with the others following him. He could come back to thoughts of his mate after he’d caught the enemy.
…
“Well, this is lame,” Kristin said, echoing her thoughts.
If only she had that map from Ross’s house. Staring at it made her feel connected to this place. It helped calm her down and to concentrate. At least she’d had the knife when they’d come here last night.
Travis’s breakfast was cooling on a plate where he’d left it. “Should we save the food for them?” she asked Kristin.
“Probably. They’ll burn off a lot of energy running.” She looked up to see Kristin staring in the direction they’d gone with a frown on her face. “I wish I could have gone. I got left behind at Glacier Peak, too. The only female Travis took was Alanna.”
It actually made her ill. She’d been left behind because she didn’t belong on a hunt of her brother—her murderer brother. But Alanna would always have a place in the pack.
“Uhh, because she’s a doctor,” Kristin said quickly. “Not because Travis liked her.”
Alanna should have been Alpha. In fact, she was beginning to suspect she’d taken Alanna’s place. Alanna would get to go with Travis places because she was a doctor. She’d always have that over LeAnn.
She was still a whore who should be throat-punched at the earliest opportunity.
LeAnn fake-smiled at Kristin…who wasn’t meeting her eyes and looked appalled. After yesterday, the pack most likely expected any mention of Alanna’s name to be met with screaming and swinging punches.
LeAnn busied herself with putting away food, trying not to bump into Kristin as she did so. One of the other male pack members had been left behind, too, but he’d gone to email out updates to others in the pack. Somewhere else in the lodge, another female member was taking a shower, totally oblivious to all that was happening.
As if she’d been summoned, the front door opened, and she could smell Alanna’s scent even before she asked the other male, “What’s happened? I saw a bunch of the pack heading off in all directions.”
Kristin’s eyes widened, and she briefly met LeAnn’s gaze before looking down.
Great. Kristin was acting afraid of her, and she was worried there’d be an all-out girl fight in a second. She might not be wrong. Especially if LeAnn stayed. Then Travis would get back and be disappointed that she’d killed their only doctor who probably still was a murdering hag…but she was a doctor.
What the hell was she doing here? She didn’t belong. Nobody really wanted her as Alpha, aside from Travis, and he clearly didn’t see her as an equal.
“I left a map at Travis’s. I’ll go get it.” And leave. Her car and her keys were at Travis’s house. The map could be a damn memento of her time here. Maybe if she left, Ross would lay off everyone and leave the pack alone.
“Uhh.” Kristin looked back and forth between her and the front area where she could hear the pack member filling Alanna in.
“It’s fine,” she said again. She’d said that so many times today, she ought to sew the stupid phrase on a throw pillow and be done with it. Then she went out the back, too, before she was forced to kill Alanna.
The air was still moist and thick but it was less cold—which was good because she didn’t want to go back inside to get the keys to Travis’s truck. Luckily, the lodge was close to Travis’s place, which was most likely not a coincidence.
There were piles of clothes on the porch, left from the men shifting, and she walked over and bent next to Travis’s and lifted his shirt to her nose. Mm. If she’d ever done a thing right in her life, maybe she’d deserve him, and he smelled amazing. Shaking her head, she dropped the shirt and left the porch.
Leaving would make her seem like a crazy freak after she’d told Travis she was going to accept the scent-match.
That was before he’d gone to hunt down her brother. Without her.
Ross looked like a good suspect for Merilee’s murder—even though she couldn’t imagine Ross killing an unarmed woman. All the evidence either pointed at him…or his sister. And she’d conveniently forgotten that. And now Ross had proved he was alive.
Damn.
Who’d have guessed breakfast would be so eventful? Other than, of course, being the most important meal of the day.
And she hadn’t even eaten anything.
The walk was helping to clear her head…sort of. The longer she walked, the more she realized she’d jumped to accept the scent-match and join the pack somewhat rashly. It was easy to be all “rah rah pack” when they’d just killed a murderous psychopath for you, but would probably be less so when the other murderous psychopath was your only relative.
Not that Ross didn’t deserve it.
But it wasn’t as if the pack would let that go. She’d always be the murderer’s sister here. And anything other than that was wishful thinking.
Hell. What had she been thinking? Her…and the sheriff…who was hunting her brother? That was insane.
As she came up behind his house, she could smell Troy…and death and a lot of blood. She was near enough to where the pack had killed him, and even if they’d taken and buried the body it nearly overwhelmed her—the area would smell like this for a good long time. This is what was waiting for her brother, her only relative. Closing her eyes, she dropped against the trunk of a tree and took deep breaths. Her inhale brought another scent—her brother’s. Ross had been around here. Death. Ross. Blood.
It might all end like this as soon as today. They might have already caught Ross even.
If they did, would it be another pack killing?
Ross would be ripped to shreds before she even got to talk to him?
Her stomach turned. She took deep breaths to avoid gagging.
What would Travis say if that happened? Sorry, LeAnn, it’s the pack way. The pack protects its own.
The pack did.
She was never going to be pack no matter how her mind tried to spin it. Not with how fast they were to go after her brother.
Tears spilled down her cheeks despite her keeping her eyes closed to hold them back. Ross’s cryptic words to Travis came to her then. What did he think Travis had done? Her brother might try to kill Travis now, too. All because she’d come here, looking for answers.
Sniffing, she opened her eyes and rubbed the tears from her cheeks. That was a pointless road to go down. She knew that from her past. You couldn’t change the past. You couldn’t arrive somewhere sooner. You couldn’t stop someone from doing something they’d already done. You couldn’t magically erase all the wrongs you’d committed by a few good deeds.
It had happened. It was over. And you picked up the pieces and moved on.
If Ross lived, LeAnn was putting Travis on his hit list if she remained. And coming here had put Ross on Travis’s. Wow, she was a terrible sister. Not that her brother didn’t deserve it, but…wow. It might even be her fault that Merilee was dead. The obvious motive with her death was to frame LeAnn.
There were bullets embedded in the trees she walked past, and the smell of blood was there, too. Her pulse roared in her ears, and the scent of blood and death sucked all the available air from around her. Her vision faded…
Stopping, LeAnn blinked rapidly. It was fine. She was fine. She breathed in and out through pursed lips. This was a different time and a different place. Sometimes, killing
was justified.
Still, there was so much blood.
And Troy was a bastard, but…
Shaking her head, she moved on. Once she wasn’t quite so close to the scent of blood and death, she’d be able to think again. Already her head was clearing. She had to be rational about this.
She had to get out of here. The pack could go back to the way it was. Life could go back to the way it was. She’d never hear firsthand how her mate had killed her brother or vice versa. If she left, it’d draw Ross after her, possibly. It was win-win for everyone, except maybe her.
And heaven knew, she didn’t deserve nice things.
Someone had boarded over the back entryway, but this was her third time breaking into Travis’s house, and even if he’d rehidden his spare key every time, keys called to her. She could smell them easily, and she’d never lost her keys even once. Travis’d buried it under a rock this time. It made her curious if he’d be able to find the key if she hid it somewhere else. Ross couldn’t find keys like she could, so it wasn’t a superpower everyone related to Lycans lucked into.
“Easy peasy,” she said, wiping off the spare key and using it before pocketing it. She’d hide it much better before she left.
Stepping into his house, she took a deep breath. Much better. Her. Travis. And then the smell of a lot of gunfire. Speaking of which… She walked by Travis’s destroyed couch to his gun safe. It didn’t feel right walking around this area without a gun right now.
Opening up the gun safe, she picked a handgun and loaded it. It wasn’t her favorite by any means, but someone had killed Merilee, and right now the only ones off her list of suspects were her and Travis…well, and a few of the pack she’d met that morning. Kristin was even a vegetarian, for crying out loud. Vegetarians were probably the least murderous demographic out there. Second only to preschool teachers and obstetricians.
She picked up the map from the counter. Something to remember Travis by. Her keys were there, too. Right beside a notepad.
Before she lost her nerve, she set down the map and grabbed a pen.
How did you say “good-bye and don’t follow me” while still leaving it open to him doing that, if he cared? He shouldn’t follow her. It wasn’t safe. Besides, chances were, the pack would say good riddance.
Dear Travis,
My family and my past will always come between us. I’m not right for you. I don’t belong in your pack. I can’t change what Ross did, but maybe if I’m not here he won’t bother with you or the pack. If you didn’t kill him already. That’s probably why you didn’t want me to come this morning. If you did kill him I guess that would be between us, too. If you did, I understand. You have to do what is right for the pack. They’re more important. But I don’t belong here either way. I want you to know
She tapped the pen. Should she really tell him how she felt about him? And how did she sign it? “Love, LeAnn”? She’d never even told him that she loved him. Tears dropped down onto the paper before she even realized she was crying.
She loved him.
She’d never told him.
Why hadn’t she told him?
Of course he’d never said it, either. Which made her cry harder.
Gah. Where was a tissue when you needed one? Ugh, she was a mess. She was such an ugly crier. Alanna probably looked beautiful when she cried. Yet another reason to hate her.
Grabbing a paper towel, LeAnn wiped her eyes before blowing her nose.
She’d cried more in the last week than she had her entire life. So much for being a badass Alpha—see, obviously she wasn’t meant to be an Alpha. She couldn’t even write a damn good-bye letter without sobbing all over it.
Leaning over, with her elbows on the counter, she cupped her hands over her eyes and took a deep breath. And then another. It’d all gone to hell so fast.
And his scent hit her. Her eyes widened and shivers of awareness skittered across her skin.
He’s here.
No! Not now!
Then an arm circled her as a needle pricked her skin.
She jerked and screamed.
No!
She wasn’t going this way! She wrestled with the arm around her, swinging them around and slamming them both against the counter, knocking the keys and the map to the floor. Her shoe caught the dropped syringe and it skidded across the floor. And then a heaviness hit her like a wall, towing her under into the blackness.
Chapter Twelve
He shifted on the lodge’s back porch with a growl still in his throat. It was hard to leave the beast behind after another unsuccessful search. When he picked up his shirt to put it on, the scent of LeAnn wafted up, making him smile. Sleeping with her in his arms had mixed their scents together—his shirt smelled like them. It was a good scent.
He inhaled again and frowned. Actually the back porch smelled like LeAnn, too. That was…a concern.
Kristin was right next to the door when they stepped in, and she was having difficulty maintaining deference as the scent of anxiety poured off her. “LeAnn left to go get a map from your place and hasn’t returned. I was about to send Nate to get you.”
He sucked in a breath. “What? When did she leave?”
“Two hours ago.”
His mouth went dry. This couldn’t be happening. It was like juggling grenades trying to keep everything in control. He’d counted on her to be here. Two hours? “And you let her go?”
“She’s Alpha,” Kristin said, crying. “And Alanna had just walked in the front door. I think that’s why she left. Maybe she thinks Alanna is still here and that’s why she hasn’t come back.”
He inhaled and forced himself to calm down. If the pack was starting to accept LeAnn as Alpha it was a good thing—even if it meant they’d not struggle to question her decisions, and he’d noticed that Kristin was showing LeAnn deference. Kristin would be one of the first…it fit with the natural hierarchy. Dammit. Maybe he should have left someone else here. Though anyone keeping LeAnn somewhere when she was determined to leave would have their hands full, and having her and Alanna in the same place might have gotten…messy.
“But Alanna’s not here?” he asked Kristin.
Kristin relaxed and let Grant pull her into his arms. “She left right after LeAnn did. She said she was following you to Troy’s, and I thought maybe it was just as well LeAnn had left before she said that.” She bit back another sob and said, “I also messed up and mentioned that Alanna was the only female in the pack you took with you to the fight in Glacier Peak, but I made sure that she knew it was because Alanna was a doctor.”
He winced. That had probably gone over like a house fire.
“She seemed like she understood,” Kristin said.
He nodded and smiled tightly.
Kristin turned in Grant’s arms and continued to cry into his shirt. Yeah, he should have left someone else here, too. Though he’d have had a hard time trusting anyone more dominant…and male. And they still didn’t know who’d killed Merilee if it wasn’t Ross. Though it definitely wasn’t Kristin.
“I’m going to go look for her at my place after I try her phone.” He patted his pockets. “Wait, I left my phone with her.”
Grant reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, tossing it to Travis. He dialed her phone first, and they all looked up at the ceiling as it rang up in the bedroom they’d used. Hanging up, he called his phone. It rang and rang…and that wasn’t good.
He shifted back and bolted out the door. Minutes later, he’d reached his place and found LeAnn’s scent.
Mine.
Mate.
And then the scent of someone else. His lips pulled back as he growled. He didn’t like this scent near his mate.
Liam had followed and was staying off his property out of deference. Travis turned and jerked his head in acceptance before he shifted back beside the door.
“Ross again,” Liam said as Travis tried the door. Unlocked.
They went inside. Her keys were on the floor along wit
h the map, but she’d left a note. Travis pulled the notepad toward him.
His stomach clenched, and bile rose in his throat. What the hell? No. No, this couldn’t be happening.
Liam cleared his throat and stepped back, reminding Travis of his presence.
His alpha side reared up. His brain told him he should brush it off. He should act like he didn’t care. Travis slammed a fist against the counter.
Why didn’t I take her with me?
If she left, being an Alpha would be all that he had. His job and his place in the pack. Things would be back under his control…but he’d go slowly mad for wanting her. And that wasn’t just the scent-match.
She’d turned his life upside down. She was crazy. She made him crazy. He couldn’t live without that. He could convince her to stay—to come back and stay.
He was a damn genius, but ever since she’d put that knife to his throat he’d become a drooling idiot. He needed his damned wits, just for a minute, so he could fix this.
Suppressing the wolf inside him, he reread the note. “The note’s not finished.”
“Maybe Ross interrupted her,” Liam said…and Travis wanted to punch him, even if he might be right. That was a possibility.
There were spots on the note. She’d been crying.
Well, why the hell is she leaving if it makes her cry?
He tore the note from the pad.
Think, dammit. Think!
He stooped to pick her keys up. “If she left, why are her keys and her car still here?”
“Maybe she left with Ross.”
It was a sad state of affairs when Liam had become the voice of reason.
Travis took her keys outside to her car and opened the trunk. “Her stuff is here. Something is…off.” And it wasn’t just because he wanted it to be. She wouldn’t have left without all her stuff, and why had the keys been on the floor?
Wait, didn’t Kristin say she came here for the map? He stalked back inside.
Travis picked up the map before tossing it in frustration. He inhaled and exhaled slowly. He was acting like a lunatic. Then he inhaled again. “Can you smell that?”
Crazy Over You Page 22
