by Lila Munro
"Please tell me you’re there," he grunted, hoping he could hold back just a moment longer.
All she seemed to be able to do was squeeze his arms harder. She tilted her head back and clutched him, her nails digging into muscle. Arching her back, she wrapped her legs around his waist and thrust upward. Luckily Dante noticed her mouth widening and realized what was going to happen. He slapped his mouth to hers and swallowed the scream that reverberated down his throat as Julie convulsed around him, sending him over the edge as well.
His thrusts slowed as he allowed her to float down and when her scream turned into rasping grasps at air, he broke contact with her lips and touched his sweaty forehead to hers.
After he caught his breath, Dante rolled off her and pulled her to her side, nestling her against him, rubbing her arm. When she started to shiver, he got up, rearranged the comforter to cover her then climbed back in behind her, wondering how long she'd stay in a state of euphoria but not wanting to rush her. She sure didn’t need to wake up feeling like she had the flu. Glancing at the clock, he knew he’d have to leave her shortly or either the boys or Blake would come looking for them. She’d need some fluids in her, too.
"Jules, can you hear me, love?" he asked, peering over her shoulder to see she was somewhere between awake and dozing.
She blinked and nodded. Responsive was good.
"I don’t want to leave you, but I need to go get you something to drink and show my face. Will you be okay for a few minutes?"
"Yes, Sir," she breathed, tucking her hands under her cheek where one tear rolled down and fell to the pillow.
She was afraid. He now remembered her saying she was afraid in the first few minutes afterward.
"I think it can wait just a bit longer." He cradled her head and kissed her crown, content to give her what they both knew she needed.
Chapter Twelve
When the alarm went off at one, Julie eased from under Dante’s arm and made her way through the pitch dark room to the door. Slipping into her silk robe that always hung on a hook on the back of it, she left the room knowing Blake would hit snooze at least twice more and inevitably end up running late before Shelby managed to make her way to their doorstep. As she pulled the door closed behind her, she heard Dante roll and mutter a low curse at the early hour and something followed about how he would never understand what could possibly be on sale that warranted this insane ritual of leaving for the mall before dawn to stand in line for hours then discover whatever it was on sale was already gone.
It was the first thing Julie had smiled about since she drifted to sleep in his arms yesterday afternoon. He returned to their guests and made her apologies, citing she’d developed a maddening headache and had taken something and gone to sleep. She’d taken something alright. A dose of endorphins, which until yesterday she hadn’t been willing to acknowledge she needed so badly. While the relief was certainly welcome, her guilt over making love with Dante weighed heavily on her. After she awakened to find she was still alone in the bedroom at almost eight o’clock last night, she’d been grateful for the reprieve. She hurriedly changed the sheets and took a shower before Blake came in to get ready for bed and became privy to what had really gone on between the main course and dessert.
Grateful for hot water, Julie stood under the spray thankful Dante was a good Master and had given her the proper aftercare she needed. She wasn’t sore anywhere and felt better than she had in a long while.
A few minutes later she was fully dressed, her hair pulled in a ponytail, her Vera Bradley backpack loaded, and she ready for the fight. She made her way through the house, following the intermittent night lights Blake had informed her were remnants of when the boys were toddlers and often needed middle of the night care. Night lights were much more convenient and conducive to sleeping in rocking chairs all night it seemed. Just before she pressed brew on her Jura, just one of the many gadgets she’d decided she couldn’t live without from the river house, she heard footsteps coming from the west end of the house. One of the twins was awake.
"Good morning," Julie said without looking. Even though she was slowly learning the quirks that gave them away as to who was who, she knew she wouldn’t be able to tell by looks alone, especially this early. She needed to hear a voice. For some reason, genetics had seen fit to give them to completely different inflections and their greetings almost always gave them away. Gav called her love and Luc referred to her as Aunt Jules most of the time, although she thought at times he’d let mom slip at any moment if given half a chance.
"Good morning, love."
Gav. She might have known. Luc liked his sleep far too much to drag out before daylight forced him.
"What are you doing up so early, darling?" she asked, going to the refrigerator. "Late night snack or breakfast?"
"Neither. Dad said you weren’t feeling well last night. I’ll find something later." Gav reached her side and gave her a peck on the cheek. "Are you better?"
"Yes, much." And she could truly say aside from the guilt gut she was sporting, she was. The thing that surprised her was she didn’t feel as though she'd betrayed Mason, only Blake. "Are you sure about the snack? I can make you some turkey hash and eggs. How about an omelet? I can make potato pancakes. There seem to be plenty of mashed potatoes left."
"Nope. Nothing." Gav reached for the coffee pot that now stood full and steaming and poured two cups then set them on the counter. "Vanilla honey creamer, right? With cinnamon sprinkled on top?"
When did the child pick up on her coffee preferences?
"You’ve been very observant, haven’t you?" Julie slid onto the corner stool as was her habit, leaving the end for Dante. That was his spot.
"I know lots of things."
A flush flew up Julie’s chest and she was grateful she’d put on a shirt that covered the coloring heat spreading. She hoped it didn’t make it to her face before Gav’s attentive nature caught wind of it. What did he know exactly?
"So if not for a snack, what on earth are you doing up?" She stirred her coffee to distribute the creamer and cinnamon then took a tentative sip after blowing over the edge of the mug.
"I know this is your day to go with Dad and Aunt Shelby, girl’s day and all that, but I was wondering if maybe you had room for me to tag along?"
"You want to go shopping? Seriously?"
"Actually I want your help with something. And that something involves shopping." Gav pulled a leftover cranberry and apple pie from the refrigerator and set it between them before grabbing two forks from a drawer and handing Julie one. "Pie?"
"Does this shopping involve a certain red haired girl?" Sticking a big bite of sweet between her lips, Julie watched the look on Gav’s face for some sign of what this mystery shopping might involve.
"Yep. I want to get her something nice for Christmas. I like her a lot. Do you like her?" He hopped off his stool and went back to the refrigerator and while his head was buried inside, he continued. "I was thinking jewelry. Luc and I would really like to call you mom. Something shiny maybe? Aren’t diamonds a girl’s best friend? I need condoms. Would you like anything else while I’m in here?" he gushed as Julie tried not to spit out the mouthful of coffee destined for her windpipe rather than her throat.
She coughed slightly and took another bite of pie, waiting for the young man to calm down enough to face her. When he didn’t really make a move to leave the refrigerator, she struck first. "Gavril, come here, please."
He rose and turned, his face redder than she knew her chest had been a moment ago. "Yes, ma’am," he said in a shaky voice.
"Please," she said, motioning for him to take a seat.
She handed him his fork and took another bite, pointing for him to do the same. Funny, Julie had never had a mother-daughter moment in her life and really had no idea how to have a mother-son one, but one thing she did know was food was a catalyst for conversation. She and Shelby or Blake or all three of them had spent hours over plates of appetizers and drinks h
ashing out their issues and fears plenty of times. Surely to God that approach would work with a teenage boy. They had stomachs, too, after all.
"What would you like to discuss first?" Julie took his free hand in hers and continued to eat pie with the other.
"I don’t know," he said, sounding choked on his own words.
After a moment he seemed to find his bearings and took an enormous breath only to blow it out and smile at her. The crooked one that showed off his dimples. No wonder he needed condoms. The girls were probably circling like birds of prey. But why on earth had he not discussed this issue with his fathers?
"Look, I know you and Papi aren’t married, and you may never be, but Luc and I love you. We always have and you feel like a mom to us. We’ve wanted to call you that for a while now, but we were afraid it would bother you to ask. We know we have two dads and all that, but having a mom around has been really nice. It’s different than a dad, or something. Is that stupid?"
"No, it’s not stupid. I’d have given my right for a mom when I was your age." Julie watched as Gavril’s shoulders relaxed for the first time since he’d sat down and she squeezed his hand for reassurance. "I think we should discuss it with your fathers, honey. It’s kind of a big deal and I wouldn’t want to do anything without them knowing first." Another wave of guilt stabbed her in the gut. "Sound fair?"
"Fair enough, but I think they’ll be okay with it." The boy picked a few cranberries from the middle of the pie and ate them one at a time, so much like Dante it was scary.
"Okay, so what next? Condoms or diamonds?" She tried to say it as calmly as possible, but the mere thought of the boys having sex so soon sent a wave of chilled heat over her. She remembered what she was doing at their age and she wanted better for them.
"I really like her," Gavin confessed with his eyes averted. Just like a man to be embarrassed by his feelings.
"Really like her? Or is there more? Or less?" Julie pried. He needed to know there was a difference in liking, loving, and lusting. "What do you like about her?"
"She’s really pretty. I don’t think I’ve ever seen eyes the color of hers. And she’s smart and funny. Did you know she wants to be an immunologist? God, she smells so good." Gav stopped and grinned. "And she’s a good kisser."
Julie had to admit she’d never seen eyes the likes of Danielle’s either and she could see how any young man could get lost in them and easily. What she was amazed with was the fact these kids actually knew what an immunologist was at their age. "It sounds like you like her more than a little and less than a lot. It also sounds like you like her for more than her body. Brains are important. Will you answer a question for me?"
"I’ll try."
"Do you know condoms aren’t foolproof?"
"Well, yeah, but I’m sure screwed without them. Right?"
She had to laugh. "Uh, yeah, even if Danielle’s on the pill, you should still always use one. But my point is, what if it fails? Do you know how hard it would be for her to attain her dreams with a baby in tow? What about your dreams, honey? The lacrosse scholarship? Duke?" She paused to watch him absorb the possibility of giving up one’s life not literally but figuratively for a bit of passion. "I’ll help you with the condoms, but your dads need to know what we’re doing and I want you to promise me you’ll think about it before you decide to have a reason to need one. Okay?"
"Okay. Will you help me tell them? I was afraid they’d be disappointed."
"I think they’ll be proud of you for being honest. I’m proud of you, too. You’re still a boy, Gavril, but you’re starting to think like a man." Julie brushed his unruly bangs back and leaned over to plant a kiss on his forehead. "Now, how much more than like do you feel? Diamonds are usually for a long way past that."
"What do you buy for strong like?"
"Birthstones…" The doorbell chiming interrupted their talk and Julie moved off her stool. "Shower and hurry. The mall waits for no man on the day after Thanksgiving. Scoot."
****
"Please, God, tell me you have a fresh pot of coffee on," Shelby grumbled, making her way through the living room behind Julie.
Peering over her shoulder while still moving forward, Julie found that Layne had taken up residence on the end of the couch opposite Dante. When had he managed to get out of bed? From the look on his face, she was fairly certain he’d been up a while and had quite possibly heard at least part of her conversation with the young Gavril. Had she fucked up her first time out as a mom?
"There’s a whole pot in there," Julie said, stopping and waving her on ahead. "Layne? Coffee? Leftover pie?" She jerked her head toward the kitchen and smiled a wide smile hoping he took the hint. It took him a second then he scrubbed his face and stood.
"Right. God damn sales," he grumbled. "I thought everyone ordered off Amazon these days."
"That’s Monday’s activity," Julie informed him, taking a seat on the coffee table in front of Dante. When she was sure Shelby and Layne were busy and paying her and Dante no mind, she rubbed her palms up his lounge pant covered thighs. "How much did you hear?"
"I’m not ready to be a grandfather," Dante hissed through clenched teeth.
"I’m not ready for that either," Julie answered, running her fingertips over the severe wrinkle running the length of his forehead. "But this is something that has to be addressed. I mean, really. What did you expect when you decided to raise them as openly as possible to your life choices? The boys are exposed to a lot more than the average kid, and honestly, they’re smart and they get it. They know sex isn’t a game. At least he’s thinking ahead and thinking of protecting himself and Danielle."
"Easy for you to say. He’s not your responsibility," he shot back, crossing his arms over his chest and puffing up like a toad.
Julie couldn’t have felt more wounded if Dante had slapped her across the face. For a moment she sat speechless then stood and moved away from him as quickly as she could. Was he hurt Gavril had come to her? That he expressed his desire to have a mother?
"I guess that answers that question," she said flatly. "You’re going to be the one to tell them, though."
"Tell them what?"
"That they can’t call me mom."
Julie spun on her heel and left him sitting by himself, wishing she could think of something to say to hurt him as badly as he’d hurt her. Then they could all be hurt because she was afraid of Blake’s reaction when she finally told him she’d fucked his husband with a house full of people within earshot.
****
"Pumpkin, what’s wrong? Layne didn’t loan us his SUV to come home with it empty," Blake said as Julie rifled through a stack of towels. "You usually have to check your balances by this time every year. Here it is nine a.m. and all you’ve managed is a few household items. No handbags, no boots, no hats and scarves and gloves. No blingy flip-flops. No Chambers eyewear. No new electronic gadgets. What’s wrong?"
"Nothing. I’m just not finding what I’m looking for," Julie said, keeping her head down trying to decide what color towels she thought the boys would like. She’d noticed when she did laundry they were always running low. Little did she know before she moved in that teen boys seemed to take a dozen showers a day. Of course after this morning’s little conversation with Gavril, she had a better clue as to why and felt like a complete idiot that she hadn't figured it out sooner. "Do you think the boys would like this shade of blue?"
Blake crinkled up his nose at the cornflower color and shook his head. "Don’t they have navy?"
"I agree with him," Shelby added. "I don’t think I’ve ever seen Tom Brady in tight pants that color."
"I guess you’re right. That blue seems more for girls. How about the dark green? Isn’t that the right shade? Which one wears that? Those Jaguars?"
"You know if you ever did anything besides read, you’d know more about this," Shelby said, piling her cart high with several shirts on hangars. "You’re thinking of Green Bay."
Julie didn’t know much about
sports. Mason wasn’t a big fan, preferring to watch the History Channel, but the boy’s bathroom was done in professional memorabilia and she had a hard time keeping all the teams and colors straight. Disgusted, she tossed the towel down, took hold of the cart, and started to move on.
"Where is Gavril anyway?" she asked, looking around, ignoring the fact Blake and Shelby were rooted to the spot staring at her. "I would hate to disappoint Master any further today by losing his heir."
Her eyebrows shot up and she slapped a hand over her mouth realizing she’d let lose a tongue that could cut like a razor if she allowed it.
"Gavril wandered over to Tiffany’s to look at gemstone jewelry. He’s supposed to meet a friend for lunch later, which I told him was a great idea. I think we need to talk over a big plate of nachos and a ‘rita, one of those in a bowl, extra Don Julio. Pumpkin, what's wrong?" Blake took her by the arm and forced her to look at him. "What did he say to you this morning?"
"Nothing that should have surprised me," Julie told him. "I’m an inheritance, not a person. Did you forget that? I’m done shopping here. Can we go somewhere else now?"
Julie abandoned the entire cart which didn’t have much in it anyway and started a quick march toward the front of Neiman Marcus.
"Julie, stop," Blake called after her. When he caught up with her but she kept walking, she heard a voice she’d never heard him use until now. "I said stop."
That mechanism inside her that caused her to take pause at any authoritative stance whatsoever kicked in and she stopped dead in her tracks. Blake took her by the hand and started a more respectable pace from the store, Shelby trotting along behind them not uttering a peep.
"Screw nachos and ‘ritas. I think we need to find pancakes and lattes. Now," Blake said, working his way through the crowds down the middle of the shopping center. He flipped out his phone and hit two on the speed dial. "Gavril, we’re taking Auntie Jules to breakfast. She’s a bit out of sorts. I think her sugar must be low or something. No, she’ll be fine. We’ll be at The Cannery."
