“I want to know everything there is to know about you,” she said quietly. “Tell me about your father.”
No way. Rob closed his eyes, remembering the sting of open fists, the suffocating darkness of closets—too many to count, the endless blur of fear and pain.
“Please?”
Rob forced himself to open his eyes, to look at Jess. “He was a beast,” he said flatly. “He died a few years ago. There’s nothing more to tell.”
“It must’ve been hard, growing up…like that.”
“I shouldn’t have brought it up.”
She was silent for a moment, gazing at Kelsey, who was turning cartwheels in the surf. “If I were you,” she finally said, “I’d be pretty proud.”
Rob couldn’t hide his surprise. “Of what?”
“Of surviving. No, not just surviving—of turning out so…so solid, and, well…nice.”
Rob had to laugh. “Oh, I’m real nice.” He had to stop talking. He had to end this conversation, even if it meant standing up and walking away. But something kept him sitting there, gazing into the midnight darkness of Jess’s beautiful eyes. “No, you’re wrong. My father was a beast, and it’s his blood in my veins.”
She looked shocked. “You are not a beast.”
“How can you be so sure?”
Jess didn’t answer. She didn’t even move—until Kelsey came splashing toward them.
“Make a wish!” the little girl shouted. “Quick—make a wish on the green flash!”
Jess turned and looked out toward the setting sun, and Rob followed her gaze. Most of the sun had disappeared from view, leaving only the very top curve above the horizon. “Kelsey’s right,” she said. “It’s going to go. Watch for the green flash.”
The mood was broken, thank God. “The what?” he asked.
Kelsey threw herself down on the sand, directly between them.
“The green flash,” Jess repeated, leaning forward slightly to talk to Rob over her daughter. “Right when the sun disappears, sometimes there’s a green flash in the sky. Haven’t you ever seen it before?”
Rob shook his head.
Kelsey reached over and took his hand. “You have to make a wish,” she said, “and it has a better chance of coming true if you hold hands. Mom says it’s concentrated power—kind of like when orange juice comes in one of those little frozen cans.”
The little girl’s hand was cool and wet, and she gave his fingers a squeeze. She was holding on to Jess with her other hand.
“Do you have your wish?” she asked, looking up at Rob. “I do.”
Jess leaned forward again. “It’s an old family superstition,” she explained with a smile. “Wishing on the green flash. Of course, the flash doesn’t happen all the time—which makes your wish that much more powerful when it does.”
Kelsey turned to Jess. “Mommy, do you have your wish?”
“Yes, I do.”
Rob couldn’t look at Jess. He wouldn’t look at her. He shouldn’t look… He couldn’t keep from glancing at her, but when he did, she wasn’t looking at him. She was gazing out across the water of the gulf.
“Here it goes,” she whispered.
Rob stared out at the setting sun, watching as it actually moved, appearing to sink into the ocean.
I wish I could have this life, and stay here forever with this beautiful woman and sweet child….
The ocean swallowed up the sun, and then, right when it was gone, there was a flash of greenish white light.
Kelsey squeezed his hand again, and Rob looked down into her round, freckled, smiling face. “Our wishes are gonna come true,” she said, her brown eyes sparkling with pleasure.
Rob looked over the top of the little girl’s head and met Jess’s eyes. Would that he had the power to make his wish come true. But he didn’t. The only ability he had was to hurt, to destroy. He only knew how to tear a life apart, not to build it. He felt tears sting his eyes, and as he gazed at Jess, he knew he wasn’t able to hide his hunger and need.
“That would be nice, Bug,” he whispered. “That would be really nice.”
THE DARK BLUE SEDAN pulled onto Route 41 behind Jess’s car.
It was four or five cars back, but she had been aware of it following her ever since she crossed the causeway leaving Siesta Key.
Kelsey had put her head down, and was fast asleep in the back seat. Rob was sitting quietly beside her, lost in his own thoughts.
A 7-Eleven was ahead, on the right-hand side. Jess slowed and pulled into the parking lot, into a slot directly in front of the store. “Mind if I pick up a loaf of bread?” she asked, quickly improvising an excuse for stopping as Rob glanced at her in surprise.
“I don’t mind,” he said.
In her rearview mirror, she watched as the blue sedan went sailing past.
If Pete the bartender was in that car that was following her, he would have stopped, wouldn’t he? But he didn’t. So it wasn’t Pete. Besides, he didn’t own the only dark blue sedan in Florida. And he was up in Bradenton right now, working.
She was becoming paranoid. Silently, she berated herself for letting her imagination get the best of her. “Sorry, what did you say?” she asked Rob.
“I said I don’t mind,” he repeated. At her blank look, he added, “That we stopped.”
“Actually,” Jess gave him a weak smile, “I probably have enough milk to last until Thursday when I get groceries. And it’s less expensive at the Publix.”
She backed out of the parking space and pulled back onto the road. Rob was watching her, his eyebrows slanted slightly together, as if he were trying to solve a puzzle. “Bread,” he said. “You said you needed bread, not milk.”
Had she? Oops. “Bread, milk…” Jess shrugged. “It’s all running low. You know how it is, living with a six-year-old. I’m probably out of peanut butter, too.”
He was still watching her. “Jess, what’s going on?”
She checked her rearview mirror. No sign of the blue sedan.
“Is someone following us?” he asked, searching her face, then turning around to look out of the rear windshield.
Jess glanced at him. “What?” she said with a laugh, “Of course not.”
He wasn’t buying it.
She sighed. Boy, was this going to sound really stupid. Now that the blue sedan wasn’t behind them anymore, it even sounded really silly to her. “Do you remember the bartender at the Pelican Club?”
Rob shook his head, no, silently waiting for her to explain what the bartender had to do with any of this.
“His name was Pete. He was—” Jess searched for the right words “—kind of…odd. He had strange eyes—he was always watching, you know?”
“Everyone there was watching you,” Rob commented. “You were on stage.”
Jess ran her fingers through her windblown hair. “No, I mean he was watching everything. Not just me.” She glanced again into the mirror. There were only three cars behind her—all big and white.
“You think this guy’s following you?” Rob asked, turning to look out the rear window again.
“Yes,” Jess said. “No.” She laughed in exasperation. “I don’t know. This serial killer thing is making me lose my perspective.” She shook her head. “I ran into Pete at the Lil’ Peach on the corner—you know, the one by my house?”
Rob nodded. He was expressionless and silent, just watching and listening.
“That was after I thought I saw him earlier today, driving past the house,” she continued. “And just now, I thought I saw his car again.” She smiled ruefully. “The key word here is thought.” She paused, but Rob still didn’t speak. “You think I’m nuts?”
He shook his head, no. “I think you’re smart to be careful.” He frowned. “Damn!”
“What?”
“I’m leaving for Orlando tomorrow. I don’t like the idea of leaving you and Kelsey alone for two weeks.”
“Tomorrow?” Jess repeated, trying to sound casually interested instead of d
isappointed. She’d seen the way Rob had looked at her on the beach. She hadn’t missed the hunger in his eyes or the way his gaze almost seemed to caress her nearly naked body. Despite everything he’d said about being friends, she was under his skin. She knew she was. She was more sure than ever.
He’d shared some of the secrets of his past with her. Lord, she knew why he didn’t speak of his childhood—why he seemed to want no connection to his family. His mother had died when he was a small child. His father had abused him. Her heart went out to the small boy that Rob had once been, and to the man that he’d become.
“The Orlando project’s definitely starting tomorrow,” he said. “I have to be there by noon. I’ll be on the road before you guys even wake up.”
Jess took the right turn onto her side street, slowing to pull into her driveway. She’d left the light on outside the garage, and she turned to look at Rob in the yellowish glow.
“We’ll be okay,” she said. “We always are.”
“Maybe,” Rob started to say, then stopped. He seemed to make a decision, looking directly into her eyes. “Maybe you should call the police.”
The police? Jess shook her head. “I don’t know.” It seemed so drastic. The police… “It’s probably nothing—I’d be too embarrassed…”
“You’ve read the newspaper accounts,” Rob urged her. “This guy stalks his victims. He follows them around—it’s called trolling, remember?”
Jess nodded slowly. Rob’s face was so serious, his eyes so concerned. He wasn’t wearing his glasses, and with his hair still messed from the ocean wind, wearing his neon orange bathing suit and a Panama Jack T-shirt, with the head of his snake tattoo peering slyly out from under the left sleeve, he looked like a totally different person from Rob Carpenter, computer programmer. He looked more like the man who had made love to her just a few nights ago.
Jess gazed at him, caught in the intensity of his eyes.
“Promise me you’ll think about calling the police?” he said.
She nodded silently. Yes. When he looked at her that way, she’d promise him damn near anything. “You really do care, don’t you?” she whispered.
He was as lost in her eyes as she was in his, as unable to look away. “Yeah,” he said. “I care.” He moistened his lips, as if they were suddenly dry. “We’re friends, right?”
Who was he reminding of that?
Jess couldn’t help herself. She reached out, running her fingers through the soft, dark curls of his hair. “We can be friends,” she said, her heart in her throat, amazed at her own daring, “and lovers.”
Rob caught her wrist, pulling her hand away from him. “No,” he said tightly. “We can’t.”
Rejection. Again. You’d think she’d have gotten used to it by now. But she hadn’t. It hurt just as much as it had the first time.
“Why not?” If he would only give her a reason.
“I’m sorry.” Rob opened the door and got out of the car, as if he couldn’t bear to sit this close to her for another moment.
Jess swore under her breath, pressing the palms of her hands against her forehead and then running them down her face. It didn’t make sense. None of this made any sense at all.
He leaned over so that he was looking in the open car window, but he carefully avoided her eyes. “Jess, I’m sorry—”
“I don’t get it,” Jess said. She was gripping the steering wheel so tightly, her knuckles were turning white. “When we’re together, it’s so great.” She turned and looked at him, willing him at least briefly to meet her eyes. “You can’t deny it.”
“Jess—”
“I’m not just talking about sex,” she continued, “although I don’t understand how you could just walk away from what we shared.”
“I’m sorry—”
“You keep saying that,” she said hotly. “Don’t tell me you’re sorry. Tell me why. Dammit, Rob, I can deal with unrequited…attraction.” She couldn’t use the word love. She wouldn’t be able to bear it if he knew… “If that’s what this is about, just tell me. Tell me something!”
She could see her misery reflected in his eyes. But he didn’t explain. He just shook his head. “You were right,” he said, his voice low, tight. “I can’t stay here. I have to move out.”
Jess closed her eyes. “Oh, God.”
“I’ll get my things out of the apartment when I’m back from Orlando,” he said.
“Rob, please—”
“I’ll pay rent until you find another tenant,” he said huskily. “Don’t worry about that. And you can keep the security deposit, since I’m breaking the lease.”
“I don’t want your money!”
“I am sorry, Jess.”
The hope that she had been harboring, the hope that had flickered to life in the past few hours that they’d spent together was snuffed, leaving her empty and cold. She’d honestly thought she could talk him into loving her. She’d foolishly thought she could turn him around. She’d hoped patience and time would bring them together.
She had been dead wrong.
THE NIGHT CLOSED IN, making him dizzy, giddy. He liked that feeling—it made the hurt disappear.
He’d been watching her for hours, lurking from closer than she ever would have believed.
She had the little girl with her. He knew the child, but when he got this way faces began to blur and names were meaningless. All the names, except for hers.
The little girl was too loud on the beach—her shouts hurt his ears.
He wanted to hold her beneath the waves until she was silent.
But now it was over and he was alone in the warm, suffocating darkness of the night.
There was another who lived nearby whom he’d been following, too. He knew that one’s schedule, knew that she’d have been home for about an hour by now.
She’d just have finished her dinner and washed up her dishes.
She didn’t know it, but she was waiting for him.
He’d be there soon.
Chapter Nine
Kelsey had just gotten out of the bathtub and into her nightshirt when the doorbell rang.
Jess peeked out the window before she opened the door. “Frank,” she said, letting the tall man into the house, automatically glancing at the neighbors and waving to old Mr. Greene who was watching from the shadows of his porch. “This is a surprise.”
Frank smiled at her, glancing around the living room.
At least it was clean, Jess thought, realizing how the slightly shabby sofa and well-used easy chair must look through a stranger’s eyes.
Frank’s gaze rested on the fireplace, his eyebrows slightly raised. Not too many homes in Sarasota had a fireplace, Jess knew, especially not a working one with solid brass andirons and fire irons. There weren’t too many days cool enough to light a fire.
“Actually I’m here because Rob called me,” Frank said.
Jess’s hand tightened on the doorknob, but she carefully kept her face calm. “Well, come on in, make yourself at home,” she said. “I was just about to tuck Kel into bed. If you don’t mind waiting a minute or two…”
“No, no,” Frank said. “Go right ahead. Mind if I turn on the ball game?”
Jess grinned. “I did say make yourself at home.”
“It’s the Sox against the Yankees,” Frank said sheepishly, picking up the remote control. “I’ve been a BoSox fan for years.”
Jess led Kelsey into the bedroom. She adjusted the air-conditioning vent, letting more cool air blow in. She pulled the sheet up to her daughter’s chin and kissed her on the nose. “Good night, Bug,” she murmured.
“That’s what Rob calls me,” Kelsey said.
Jess nodded. “I know. I like it.”
“Me, too.” Kelsey pulled Jess’s ear down close to her mouth. “That guy was at the Pelican Club, wasn’t he?”
“Yeah,” Jess whispered back. “His name’s Frank. He works at the same place Rob does.”
“He’s tall,” Kelsey said. “And he
likes baseball. Rob likes baseball, too.”
“He does?” Jess couldn’t keep the question from popping out.
“Yeah. When is Rob going to come back?”
“Not for a couple of weeks,” she told her daughter. Now was not the time to discuss Rob’s moving out. But she’d have to tell Kelsey sooner or later.
“I miss him,” Kelsey said.
“I do, too,” Jess whispered. She gave her daughter another kiss. “Good night.”
She flipped the light off, and left the room, leaving Kelsey’s door open about four inches.
Jess didn’t feel like going into the living room and playing hostess. It wasn’t that she disliked Frank—she didn’t really know the man—but the past week had left her feeling emotionally scraped raw.
She’d heard Rob’s car return late last night—well after 2:00 a.m. And, like he’d said, he was gone again when Jess got Kelsey up and ready for school.
Yeah, she felt wounded. And taken advantage of. She had never had a one-night stand before, and the thought that she’d so misjudged both Rob and the situation made her feel even worse. But maybe what she’d had with him wasn’t a one-night stand. Maybe it was just a very, very brief love affair. One-night stands were had and forgotten. Somehow, she suspected it would be a long, long time before Robert Carpenter forgot about her.
Frank looked up, muting the television as Jess came into the living room.
“So what’s a Boston Red Sox fan doing down in Florida?” she asked, forcing herself to smile.
Frank shrugged. “I go where the job sends me,” he said. “And with cable these days, I can pick up the Sox just about anywhere.”
“You said that Rob called you?” Jess sat down in the easy chair across from him, trying not to let hunger show in her eyes at the mention of Rob’s name.
“Yeah, this afternoon,” he said. “He asked me if I wouldn’t mind staying in his apartment while he’s away.”
“He did?”
“Yes, ma’am,” Frank said. “He told me you were afraid someone’s been following you. He thought you might like having a man within shouting distance.” He glanced back at the television. “I would have been over earlier, but something came up and I had to work late, so…” He shrugged. “Here I am. He said you’d be able to give me an extra key.”
No Ordinary Man Page 11
