by R.J. Adams
Thirteen
I hear the sounds of birds chirping and light whispers as I feel a ray of warmth on my skin, I was cold, so very cold and now I am nice and warm. I open my eyes and I am blinded by a pale pink light above me, am I dead? Is this what heaven looks like? Surely a person like me with an evil baby wouldn’t go to heaven if there was such a place, I would go to the deep depths of hell where Satan would be welcoming me no doubt, is this a trick?
As I sit up and look around me, I see floating people everywhere in long white gowns, I look down and I am in a long white gown made of lace, I must be dead because what I see is beautiful, nowhere in the world can look like this. Everything seems so beautiful, so calm and free, if I’m not dead then surely this must be a dream, right?
“Willow, you’re here,” a figure approaches me but their face is blocked by the light, “take my hand.” The voice sounds so sweet and gentle that without hesitation I take the hand that is offered to me.
The face comes into focus and there she is, my mother but she isn’t wearing the dress I am so used to seeing her in, she floats in a white gown just like the others, “Am I dead?”
She smiles, “no my darling, you are in Oreneeras, the place in-between life and death, I saw what you did, well, we all did, you sacrificed yourself to save humanity, that was a very brave thing to do.”
Wait, if I’m in Oreneeras then surely I must be dead, it’s in-between life and death right, wait, I’m not dead or alive? Ouch, my head hurts, I’m so confused. “Mom, I don’t understand why I am here, and not dead, or drowning!” Surely I should still be in the water, who would have pulled me out?
“Because you made a great sacrifice and the Tasura’s magic placed you here, come,” she takes my hand and we walk together.
It’s so beautiful up here, pale pink light shines down from above and below my feet is like diamonds, the ground is made from sparkling diamonds, “this is where you have been hiding out?”
“Yes,” she smiles, “the warlock’s cannot enter here so it was the safest place to be, if they had gotten the Voluric who protected you and used his blood, then they would have entered but you stopped that.”
“But surely, if it is in-between life and death then a warlock can come here too, I mean.... they would have times when they are in-between right?” I didn’t kill the warriors so surely they should have ended up somewhere like here.
“Oh my child, no, Oreneeras is a place of good magic, sure this is a place for warlocks and dark magic fellows alike to go but it’s a very dark and cruel place, you’re here because the Tasura saw your use of good magic and your sacrifice brought you here.”
As I walk with her, Toby springs to mind, “holy shit Toby! I don’t know what happened....”
“Shhh,” my mother interrupts, “do not worry about that, Toby is perfectly safe, your love for him and your willingness to make sure he was safe is what set him free from the land of dark magic, you managed to get him to safety and he is perfectly fine.”
Oh thank god for that, when he left I was scared not knowing where he was going to end up, although a slight part of me knew he was safe but I wasn’t a hundred percent sure.
My mother leads me to a temple surrounded by tall white pillars and a huge gold bowl in the middle filled with water. “What is this?”
“This my darling is the temple of choice,” she moves me so I stand right next to the bowl, “you see, when you come here, which may be for many of reasons, whether it be death or your own free will, the Tasura may allow you a choice.”
I look at the water ripples flowing out in the bowl, “what kind of choice.”
“A choice on whether you wish to move on to the next place or whether you wish to go back, it is not always done, sometimes you do not have a choice and the Tasura will automatically choose what they feel is best, it depends on why you are here, freewill or not .”
I look at her eyes wide, “go back, you mean, back there as in home, or the world, whatever it is, you mean back to being alive?”
She smiles, “yes, although you’re not technically dead, remember they brought you here so you are allowed to have that choice because of the great sacrifice you made for the world, to make sure they didn’t live in darkness.”
My hand instantly moves over my tummy and I stare at my reflection through the water, “I can’t, I can’t go back, there is baby to be born that is so cruel....”
“No there isn’t,” she turns my head to face her, “the child is no longer, you leaping into that ocean caused you to lose the foetus, it doesn’t exist, if you want to go back you can.”
“But, my father will still come after me; he will never stop as long as I am there.”
“My dear, your father was taken away by the Tekati Warlocks, they saw that their beloved Prince had died, well done by the way,” she nudges me friendly, “they blamed your father for this, without Prince Chanile and an heir as he promised they seized the opportunity to take him and take-over.”
Oh my god, so as powerful as my father may have been he needed me for a lot more than I realised, “and the dark magic in me?”
“Gone,” she smiles, “when you leaped to your death, you killed that part of you and the dark magic with that evil thing that was inside of you, the good magic was so overpowering in you that I forced the dark magic away, and it will never be part of you again.”
Wow, a life without dark magic trying to ruin me at every turn I make, “and what about the people that died, Doreen, Alfie, and Henry? What about them?”
My mother’s eyes sadden, “they were killed by dark magic long before you defeated your father, unfortunately I cannot bring them back, I cannot raise the dead but you still have a future, if that is what you choose.”
“And what about you,” I look into her soft blue eyes, “where do you go from here?”
“I’m stuck here; I have been here far too long that the Tasura believe I should remain, helping out those who come through here.”
“Well that’s not fair,” I want to cry, “you did what you did because you felt you had to, you shouldn’t be punished for that.”
She smiles, “I’m not being punished, I help good witches like you either move on or go back, I watch over them and help them just like I helped you. Oh my daughter,” she sighs heavily, “you do not worry about me and make your own choices, no matter what I will support you and if you choose to go, I will watch over you until the time comes for us to meet again.”
“What are the Tasura anyway, in all this fighting for my life crap and speaking to people, no-one has ever really told me what they are, I suppose being me I should know right?”
“Of course you do, the Tasura are the highest power of all good witches, kind of like an army and legal advisers if you will, they tried to stop your father but it all came down to you, you were the final piece of the puzzle, and they govern us and make sure us good witches follow the rules.”
“Oh my god, there are rules? I have follow rules?”
“Of course, that’s why dark magic is so addictive, there are no rules with that, you can use magic as you choose but there are severe consequences however warlocks do not care about this, you made a choice and it was the right one, so don’t dwell on it, make a decision on what you want to do.”
I need to think about this, it’s a big decision, going back to a world where I had nothing, imagined something to creative I brought darkness to myself.
Okay, so I may not have those powers anymore but I will still have nothing when I go back, but then again I want to be with Toby. He saved me and I don’t think I could be without him.
“Have you made a decision?” My mother asks distracting me from the running thoughts in my head.
“Yes, I want to go back, but I’m scared. I grew up with nothing and when I go back, I will go back to having nothing. I mean, will I still have magic?”
“Don’t be silly,” my mother laughs as if to mock me, “this time you will have everything you need and
yes, you are a witch at birth and you chose good magic so that magic will always be inside you, spell casting the power you had at Acribus Castle, moving things, all of that will remain with you for life, trust me. But use it wisely and use it to help those good people who need assistance sometimes.”
“Well, I will never hurt someone intentionally but it’s good to know I have magic to protect myself with,” I smile. I look at her gentle face and I trust what she is saying to me, “will Toby know me if I go back?”
“Of course he will don’t worry about that, we’re not memory erasers you know,” she giggles.
“Okay,” I take a deep breath, “then send me back.”
My mother smiles and hugs me, “I will always be watching over you,” she kisses my forehead and then mumbles some words in another language I don’t quite understand.
I look at her and she begins to fade into the distance and the light becomes so bright it is blinding. I close my eyes and then I feel like I’m falling, I feel sleepy and light headed and then everything goes quiet, so very quiet.
I open my eyes and there on my palm is a butterfly, is that my mother. It flutters and then flies away; I sit up and see that I am in the field, oh my god I am in Toby’s field.
I look down and I have jeans on and a top, did they change me? ‘Good luck my daughter,’ I hear echoed in the wind, I guess the Tasura must have put me here.
I get up and look around, the sun is shining brighter than I ever seen and I feel happy. I see a man in the distance walking in a slouch position, he looks miserable as he drags his feet through the grass. Is that Toby?
I stand and watch as he walks in the distance oblivious to my presence. I look deeper at his posture and dimena about him, it’s definitely Toby. I’m so glad he’s okay.
I wish he would just look at me; I don’t want to call out his name. What if he hears it and then runs away, I may want to be here with him but after everything I put him through, he may never want to see me again, I mean I can’t blame him if that is the case.
As I stare at him walking across the field he stops and looks ahead, the sun is shining brightly that it is hard for me to see his face. He turns slowly and is now facing me but I cannot see his expression. He is still and doesn’t move, is he happy that I am here or frozen on the spot because he is too scared to come anywhere near me?
I stand completely still; if he is too scared to come anywhere near me then I don’t want to make it worse.
He slowly starts walking towards me but his persona still seems a little shy, reluctant or afraid. But it’s hard to tell with the sun shining brightly in my eyes.
He comes closer and the sun moves from his face and he steps in to view, I see a huge smile on his face. He stands in-front of me just gawking at me, “am I dreaming?” He whispers.
“No, you’re not dreaming, I’m really here,” I reach out to touch him but he flinches, “it’s okay, I’m real I promise and I won’t hurt you.”
As my hands touch his face he closes his eyes as if he is relieved to feel my touch, “how do I know this is not a trick, an evil trick, if this is a dream then I do not want to wake up.”
“Shhh,” I whisper cupping his face, “it’s me I promise, open your eyes and look at me.”
He opens his eyes slowly and then stares into mine, “how is this possible? I saw you, you were going to jump and I haven’t heard from you in weeks.”
Weeks, what does he mean weeks? I have been gone barely a few hours, maybe more than that but not weeks surely.
“I missed you, you sent me back here and then I didn’t know how to reach you,” he murmurs, “I went back to the orphanage and it had changed, it was sunny there. I have been there every single day and finally I gave up hope that you were ever coming back.”
The orphanage is sunny? But it’s always dark there, I guess since my father has been destroyed and the darkness has left me then it would look like a normal abandoned building, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know I had been gone weeks, it only felt like a few hours to me if that. Are you alright?”
He smiles, “I am now that you’re here, but how is it possible?”
“They sent me back, they saw what I did and gave me a choice and I didn’t want to be without you so I came back.”
He looks content but then suddenly his eyes open and he jumps back, “oh my god, the evil baby inside you, what the hell....”
I place my finger over his lips to shut him up, “there is no evil baby, I leapt off the edge of the mountain, the baby, my dark magic, my father, it’s all gone and we don’t have to worry about that anymore.”
He stands wearily of my omission, I see the doubt in his eyes but who can blame him, “are you sure, I mean we don’t want the death child roaming around do we.”
Ahh, his cheekiness is back, I laugh slightly, “I’m sure, it’s hard to explain but I’m not going anywhere and there is no death baby. Just me.”
He touches me and then looks around me, “if your dark magic has gone, does that mean you have no magic at all now?”
I grin at him, “yes, I do have magic; I will always have magic because I am a witch by birth. But its good magic and I can use it to help others if I want to. Look, I’ll show you what good magic can do.”
I close my eyes and hold his hands, he moves closer to me and I can almost feel his heartbeat beating against my chest. The ground shakes slightly and then I open my eyes, he opens his as he feels the rumbling beneath his feet.
There growing around us is a beautiful tree and orchards blossom from the branches in a lovely white and pale blue colour just like the open skies above.
He looks in amazement as we stand shaded under the beautiful tree that I have created just by thinking of it. Orbs of white light surround us and I can feel that the bond we once shared is still very strong.
“This is amazing,” he mumbles, “it’s so beautiful.” He looks down to me after gazing at the tree and pulls me in for a kiss. His lips softly touch mine and he gives me the loving kiss I have spent a long time longing for and then rests his head on mine, “I have wanted to do that since the moment I kissed you in that church, just never had the chance.” He smiles.
“Well you will have all the chances in the world, well until you get bored of me I guess and move on.”
He gives a cheeky smile and strokes my cheek, “that will never happen, there is no other girl like you and besides, with you I have more than enough adventure, mystery and god knows what else to keep me entertained.”
I laugh a little, I have the same with him. It doesn’t matter that I am inexperienced with love or that I have never had another boyfriend, to me, Toby is the one that I want and I couldn’t picture being with anyone else.
“Just before you sent me away, you said you loved me, is that still true?” He mumbles looking down nervously at the ground.
“Of course it is, I said it because I meant it and I will always mean it.”
He pulls me into him, lifts me up and spins me around as we both laugh and kiss. This is my life now. Here with him. I don’t know what will happen, what trouble I will have to face with this magic inside me or even if the Tekati Warlocks will come for me, but I will take each day as it comes with Toby by my side.
He stops and puts me down, he pulls out his phone and then looks at me, “what, what is it?” I ask curious by his massive smile.
He kisses me softly and holds me in a tight embrace, leaning into my ear and he whispers gently, “Happy Birthday,” and I smile.
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