by Wild, Nikki
“Well, you would eventually! Look, I don’t know who this Jesse character is, but I like him already!”
“You haven’t even met him, Eddie,” I replied.
“No, but I’ve smelled him. And he smells like money and flowers. And any man that smells like cash and roses is a keeper!”
I laughed, shaking my head at him.
“You’re as crazy as he is,” I said.
“And so are you if you don’t keep all this,” he said, snapping his fingers.
“Maddy, come back in,” I yelled. She jumped out of the car and jogged back in the house. I cringed when I realized that just that little bit of exertion had left her breathless.
“Are you okay, honey?” I asked. “Do you need your inhaler?”
“Maybe,” she said. “I’ll go get it. I love that car, mama!” she yelled over her shoulder as she ran to her room.
I turned back to Eddie to see him studying my face intently.
“You got laid.”
“Oh, my God, Eddie! We are not talking about this right now!”
“Girl, I know that look, that glow. Don’t try to lie to Uncle Eddie, because I can always tell. Mmm, mmmm - roses, money and sex - girl, what kind of fancy treasure have you found?”
“Shut up!” I said, hushing him. I’d be mortified if Maddy heard him. I turned to go to her room when the doorbell rang.
“God, what now?” I asked, opening the door.
An old lady, with her white hair perched on top of her head in a huge bun, stood there holding a tiny white kitten in her arms.
“Yes?” I asked. “Can I help you?”
“Delivery for Maisey Jayne,” she replied, as she pushed the kitten into my arms. My mouth dropped in surprise.
“No, I can’t —,” I began, pushing the kitten back towards her.
“All the food, bedding, toys and everything else is right here,” she gestured to a pile of things she’d left on the porch and turned abruptly and walked away, leaving me standing there completely dumbfounded with the cutest kitten I’d ever seen purring in my arms. She brushed up against my cheek, staring up at me with huge, blinking blue eyes.
Maddy bounded around the corner and shrieked in pleasure.
“A kitten!” she cried. I sighed, handing her the kitten, and walking back into my flower filled house.
“What have I gotten myself into?” I wondered out loud.
“I don’t know, but does he have a lonely brother?” Eddie asked.
JESSE
My phone rang as I was doing the exercises Maisey left and insisted I do three times a day. My knee was getting much better, instead of worse like I thought it might be after the work out I’d given it last night.
“Hey beautiful,” I answered with a smile.
“Jesse, you are too much!”
“I take it you got my delivery?”
“Delivery? More like you sent an entire florist’s shop to my house!”
“Four of them… Actually… Do you like the flowers?” I asked.
“Like them? Well, of course, they’re flowers, what’s not to like? But it’s too much! It fills up my entire house!”
“Good, that was my intention.”
“And what was your intention with the kitten?”
“Oh, good Susie showed up, too? I love that little lady. She fosters cats and always has someone ready to be adopted. Did she bring you the white one?”
“Yes, but —,” she protested.
“That’s for your daughter,” I interjected. “Did she name her yet?”
“Yes - Snowflake - but Jesse, we can’t keep all this!”
“Of course you can. Why can’t you?”
“Because it’s too much, for one. Secondly, I can barely walk in my house. I’m not sure how big you think my house is, but this is ridiculous. And how in the hell did you find out my address, by the way?”
“Does it matter? Listen, Maisey,” I said. “This is more for me than it is for you. Did it make you smile?”
“Well, of course.”
“Then my mission is accomplished. I want to make you happy, babe,” I said, my heart swelling as I said it out loud. “I care about you, Maise.”
Her sigh on the other end of the phone ripped through me.
“I don’t mean to be ungrateful, Jesse,” she said. “I just don’t know if this is a good idea.”
“Tell you what,” I said. “Let’s talk about it tomorrow. Just enjoy yourself today, go for a ride somewhere nice with your daughter and I’ll see you in the morning, okay? It’s not the end of the world, Maisey. If it helps you feel any better, my team owner paid a disgusting amount of money to get me through rehabilitation. Your boss is hanging onto all of it without giving you so much as a pay raise. You’re riding around in a cab trying to make ends meet. You deserve better. Consider the car a work bonus that you damn well deserve for all the time and energy you’ve given that place. If you still don’t think you earned it by the time my knee is working, I’ll take it back no questions asked…”
“You’re very generous,” she said.
“Sometimes, I am,” I said. “You bring out the best in me.”
I could hear her smile in her voice.
“So… Tomorrow then?” I asked.
“Okay. Tomorrow,” she replied. “See you then.”
“Bye, Maise,” I hung up the phone quickly before I ended the conversation in privacy with three little words I knew she wasn’t ready to hear.
Soon, though. I was making progress. I’d broken through her shell, got her back into my bed, and in return, she’d managed to climb her way into my heart at the same time.
I’d never felt like such a fucking soft-hearted mushy freak before, and damn, it felt good to care about someone again.
I smiled as I went back to my exercises, allowing my mind to drift back to last night and the sound of my name on her moaning lips. If my knee was hurting, I sure as shit wasn’t feeling it. This high was better than anything I’d find in a painkiller…
Tomorrow would be a good day.
MAISEY
“Wow, look at you!” I said, after Jesse opened the door to his penthouse. “You’re barely limping.”
“Well, I’d like to take all the credit myself, but I can’t. I have this amazing physical therapist who’s a total hard-ass and she’s been giving me the best goddamned workout of my life,” he winked.
“Well, apparently that’s exactly what you needed,” I quipped. He looked great, I had to admit it. His limp was noticeably improved and he wasn’t wincing in pain with every step he took. I didn’t mind taking credit for it at all, but if he hadn’t been working to get better, he wouldn’t have.
“I’m thinking maybe we should move up to two or three treatment sessions a day,” Jesse replied, giving me a sideways smile.
“You sure you can handle that kind of hard work?” I said, laughing. “Seriously though Jesse, we’re not out of the woods yet. This is fun, but we still need to get you back in top shape. You’ll need to get back to the clinic soon.”
“Or maybe I can get them to bring the clinic to me.”
“Do you always get your way?” I asked, teasingly.
“Yes, in fact, I do,” he said, jutting his chin out proudly.
“Lucky you,” I replied, dryly.
“Don’t you?” he asked.
“I don’t really have a lot of things I want, so not getting them doesn’t make much of an impact,” I replied.
“You wanted me, didn’t you?” he asked, pulling me into his arms and brushing his lips against mine. I kissed him back quickly.
“Yes, I did,” I whispered, my skin rippling with goosebumps at his touch. He reached up and spun one of my curls around his fingertip, then let it spring loose before he trailed the tip of his finger over my jaw. I bit my lip, looking up at him, mesmerized by his touch again.
“Do you still want me?” he asked.
“I want you more, now that I’ve had you again,” I replied, my
voice thick with emotion.
He kissed me again, harder this time, electric jolts of pleasure rushing through my body. I couldn’t help but kiss back. I’d been thirsty for him since I’d left him. I’d thought about him all day yesterday, my body still buzzing from our lovemaking.
“But,” I said, breaking our kiss and pushing him slightly away from me. “I’m here to work first. If we don’t get serious about your treatment, we’ll be behind and you won’t be ready in September.”
“But I’m already doing better,” he protested, attempting to pull me back into his arms. I spun around, untangling myself from him.
“Better isn’t good enough and you know it,” I said.
“Okay, we can work, if you promise we can play later,” he winked.
“Is that all you think of?” I teased. “Sex?”
“When you’re in front of me, I gotta admit, sex is pretty much all I can think about,” he shrugged. He was so full of charm and swagger, it was hard to resist him. I had my career to think about, and so did he. I wasn’t about to let us throw everything we’d both worked so hard for away because we couldn’t keep our hands off of each other. We weren’t teenagers anymore. We were adults, even if he made me feel eighteen again when he looked at me with those hungry eyes of his.
“Business first,” I said, leaning over and kissing him quickly. “Play later.”
“You’re such a hard-ass,” he said.
“You like it,” I teased. “I’m sure you never have anyone telling you what to do, do you? Surrounded by yes-men like Grady. It’s good for you.”
“If you say so,” he relented.
“I say so. Now, lay on your back and let me torture you a little,” I winked.
“I thought you’d never ask,” he said, laughing as he laid down on the floor.
* * *
The next few hours flew by in a flurry of sexual innuendos and screeches of pain. I worked him hard. Maybe a little too hard, but I was trying to make up for time lost between his sheets. By the time we were finished, he was sweaty and weak.
“Look at you,” I said, standing over him. “Weak as a kitten. I could really take advantage of you right now if I wanted to.”
“Does that mean we’re finished with all this?” he said.
“Yes,” I replied. “For today. But tomorrow will be just as intense, if not more.”
“Can’t wait,” he said sarcastically. He stood up and stared at me in silence for a moment, until it was so uncomfortable I couldn’t stand it.
“Why are you staring at me? Stop,” I said.
“I can’t. You’re so fucking gorgeous, Maisey. You’ve turned into such a woman, a real woman, you know? I love it. I never thought you’d be…” he gestured to my body, his hands flying up and down to include every curve, “…so voluptuous.”
“I think the word you’re looking for is curvy,” I said.
“Nope, you’re voluptuous. Luscious. You’re like a succulent peach, all juicy and sweet.”
“Did you take extra pain meds today? I think you’re high,” I replied.
His laughter made me laugh, and before long we were belly laughing like a couple of crazy people, our voices echoing through his cavernous penthouse.
He reached over, sliding his arms around my waist and pulling me close to him.
“Let’s go to bed,” he said.
“I can’t,” I replied. “Sorry, I lied earlier to get you to do your exercises.”
“Why not?” he answered, clear disappointment falling on his face.
“Because I have to pick up my daughter from school,” I said, pulling away from him.
“Oh!” he replied. “Okay, I see.” He bit his lip, lost in concentration before speaking again a moment later. “Can I come?”
“What?” I asked, blood draining from my face. “I - um - well - I —,” I stuttered.
“— sorry, too soon,” he said. I looked over at him, and felt like a total bitch when I saw the look on his face.
“No, that’s not it, it’s just that I - well, I was intending to keep this between us.”
“Is that so?” he asked.
“I mean - it’s not - well I just want to keep my personal and business lives separated.”
“I might be a part of your business life, Maisey, but this is hardly strictly business.”
“I know, that’s not what I meant,” I replied, flustered. “It’s just…I don’t bring men around my daughter. I just don’t think you’d be good for her.”
“You don’t think I’d be good for her?” he repeated.
“No, wait! That’s not what I —,” I began. I was a total ass and that wasn’t how I meant for that to come out. But it was too late. The damage was done.
“It’s fine,” he interrupted, turning away, but not before I saw the hurt in his eyes. “Look, she’s part of your life, and I want to be part of your life. I’m not trying to be her father. I just thought I could…”
There it was… He wasn’t trying to be her father.
“Jesse, stop… I meant to say this - not you. This wouldn’t be good for her. All of this… She’s never seen me in a relationship. I’m not sure I’m ready to take that step.”
“From the sounds of it, you’re not,” he replied, spinning around, the pain in his eyes replaced by anger. Or maybe it was a mask. Either way, his words stung. Hard.
“Maybe I’m not,” I replied, my voice rising as I turned towards the door. “I’ve gotta go.”
“Go,” he said, his words simple but full of anger.
Shit, I thought. I really fucked up now. I hurt him. I should have chosen better words, or just figured out some other reason why he couldn’t come with me. Instead, I’d hurt him and he lashed out, wanting to hurt me too.
But his words had a different effect. Instead of hurting me, they woke me up.
It was time to end this. It had gone too far. I was flying too close to the sun and my wings were melting. This was the first time he’d asked to meet Maddy, but it wouldn’t be the last. Did I really think I could continue this way without the two parts of my life overlapping or worse - colliding? Did I really think I could keep everything a secret?
I’d been a fool.
I walked towards his door, the heat of his gaze burning right into the back of my head. I wanted to turn around so badly, every fiber in my being told me to run back into his arms and apologize. I wanted to tell him everything.
But I didn’t. My pride got in the way. Or, maybe it was just my good sense had finally surfaced. Either way, it hurt like hell as my fingers wrapped around his door knob and I opened his door and walked away from the only man I’d ever loved and went back home to the girl I’d pledged my life to.
Sacrifices. I’d been making them my whole life.
But for some reason, this one hurt a whole hell of a lot more than any that had come before.
JESSE
Asshole.
Prick.
Dumb-ass.
Self-sabotaging fool.
Those were just a few of the names that I’d been calling myself ever since Maddy walked out the door.
I felt like the biggest idiot in the world. I’d never really done relationships, but if this was my first, then I was failing miserably at it.
I hadn’t meant to hurt her. I shouldn’t have lashed out the way I did. After having such a kick-ass day with her, laughing and joking around and flirting - I just didn’t want our day to end. That’s why I wanted to go. I hadn’t even given much thought to meeting her daughter yet, but apparently she’d given it plenty of thought herself. Small wonder she had decided it would be a big, fat mistake to introduce her daughter to the asshole playboy she’d been having a good time with at work.
And maybe she was right…
I’d been a fool to think I could be anything else, to think I could be the relationship kind of man for Maisey. I’d been so wrong. Just like always, I’d been arrogant and far too sure of myself, and just look where it got me.
None of it made any sense, though. Was I really that bad for her?
After an hour of beating myself up, I tried to call her to apologize, but she didn’t answer.
Fine, she needed space. I could do that. I was the king of needing space. I got it. I’d give her what she needed. I’d give her some time.
And if she still didn’t want anything to do with me, well, then I’d just move on, wouldn’t I? Just like I’d always done.
It had been easy in the past. Effortless…
There was only one problem.
I was in love with this girl.
True blue sappy country song love. The kind of love that makes people do stupid things.
This time my heart was involved, and moving on might not be an option.
The hours dragged by slowly, and I just couldn’t put this woman out of my mind. I put on my shoes and figured the best thing I could do was exercise.
I hadn’t been for a run since the accident, and I sure as shit couldn’t pull it off now. My knee was already starting to ache almost as much as my chest. I stepped out the door, determined to try to make it around the block. Worst case, I could chalk the day up as a complete failure…
And that was an accomplishment in itself.
MAISEY
Exhaustion was getting the best of me. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t eat. I could barely think. Jesse’s face, his eyes, the memory of his touch wouldn’t let go of me.
The worst thing of all? Every time I looked at Maddy, I saw him. I couldn’t even find solace in her, because all I could see was him staring back at me in her eyes. His eyes. They were one and the same. The only thing she’d gotten from me was my curls. Even her hair was the same color as his, she gestured like him, and I swear to god she even blinked like him. It was eerie.
She’d never even met him and he was imprinted on her. He was a part of her.
Letting things get this far was a mistake. A huge mistake that I’d spend who knows how long recovering from.
His comment about not trying to be Maddy’s father only solidified things in my mind.
