‘They wanted to go to your hotel.’
‘Of course they did. A nice, impersonal hotel where they can cling to each other without the world intruding-or a single bed and a stretcher with a guy they hardly know.’
‘That’s what I mean. They don’t know me.’
‘They don’t know you but they need you. They’re terrified kids. What was Lucy’s mother thinking, to let them go?’
‘She’ll have orchestrated the whole thing,’ he said, anger rising. He dug his hands deep in his pockets and she saw his hands clench within the denim. ‘She and her parents. Lucy said she wanted her to get rid of it. When that didn’t happen, faced with a granddaughter, a child of Eurasian descent… She’ll have shipped her off to me. Of all the…’
His face was etched with pain, and she felt ill. For all of them. ‘You must have been a baby yourself when Lucy was born,’ she whispered, half-scared to probe.
‘Nineteen.’ He wasn’t seeing her now, she thought. He was staring out at the sea, at the past, at nothing. ‘A raw kid. I knew nothing.’
‘Enough to conceive a child,’ she said, and he gave a raw, half-laugh.
‘Yeah. Med student. I couldn’t even stop that.’
‘It takes two to make a baby.’
For a while she thought he wasn’t going to answer. But finally… ‘It does,’ he said at last. ‘I had a… well, dysfunctional family doesn’t begin to cut it. Home was never home as anyone else knew it. My mother went from one low-life boyfriend to another, but she liked the sea and there was always a school library at every place we went to, so study and surfing were constants. Finally I got lucky, found some decent foster-parents, got some help. I got into medicine at sixteen. Child prodigy, they said, but obsessive study produces the same effect. Then a scholarship to London. Off I went, delighted to be shot of the mess that family wasn’t.’
‘Oh, Riley…’
He didn’t hear. He was talking to the sea, to something out there that had no connection to anything.
‘Marguerite was beautiful, loving, warm, and it blew me away that she wanted me. It was only later that I figured it out. I was straight from the surf. I was big and bronzed and I was Australian. Her friends thought I was cool and her parents thought I was appalling. It was the combination she wanted. I did know she was in full rebellion mode, but I didn’t figure it. That I was simply part of that rebellion. Maybe she sabotaged the condoms, I don’t know. All I knew was that at the end of summer she wanted nothing more to do with me. She’ll have got pregnant for her own reasons. She never told me.’ He closed his eyes. ‘To have had a daughter for eighteen years and not know…’
‘Oh, Riley…’
‘Dumb,’ he said. ‘I even thought I was in love.’ He turned to face her then, and his face was as bleak as death. ‘Last night…’
‘I’m on the Pill. And I’m not Marguerite.’
‘I don’t do family,’ he said. ‘I never have.’
‘You don’t or you haven’t? It seems to me that family’s found you. Your daughter…’
‘She’s my daughter in name only.’
‘No, in need. It’s not Lucy’s fault,’ she said, striving to keep her voice even. ‘How she was conceived.’
‘You think I don’t know that?’
‘So you found out…’
‘Three months ago. An email, nothing more.’
‘Then you must have responded magnificently,’ she said, quietly but firmly, ‘for her to come. You must have told her you care. Three months ago she’ll have been five, six months pregnant and terrified. She’ll have contacted you looking for options and you’ve responded with concern. That’s what she needs right now. Caring. Family.’
‘I’m not family.’
‘You are,’ she said, and she took his hands in hers and tugged until she had his full attention.
This was important, she thought, for her, suddenly, as well as for him. Her parents had been cold and distant. Riley’s had hardly been parents at all. For Riley to be a dad seemed huge. Bigger than both of them.
It was so important she had to fight for it.
‘Riley, both our parents messed things up for us,’ she said, and she knew she was going where she had no right, but she had no choice. There was something about this big, solitary man that touched a chord.
He’d travelled a harder road than she had, she thought, and he’d come out more scarred. Scars couldn’t disappear completely but he could move beyond them. He must.
Riley. She was holding his hands. Strong hands, capable, skilled, loving. Hands that had made her feel…
Don’t go there. He didn’t want her. Last night was all she could have of him.
Deep breath. He’d been there for her. He’d saved her life.
She was halfway to falling in love with him, she thought. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
He didn’t want her, but he was alone. The thought was suddenly unbearable. And with that…
If all that was left for him was his daughter, she’d fight for Lucy. She’d give him a family whether he wanted it or not.
‘Lucy is your family,’ she said. ‘You just have to let her see you care.’
‘I don’t have a choice. You’ve landed me with everyone!’ It was an explosion of vented frustration and anger. It caught them both on the raw.
Silence.
She could respond with anger. With hurt.
This was too important for either.
‘Riley, let’s get things in perspective,’ she said, somehow keeping her voice even. ‘You’re not stuck with us. Not for ever. Last night was what I needed to let me move on. It’s made things hard between us but not impossible. I don’t have a money problem. I need to stay here until Amy goes but that’s the extent of it. I would like to stay working in Whale Cove-with you, if that’s possible, as part of your team, but that doesn’t mean I’m part of your life. I’ll get my own apartment. Amy will go back to Dry Gum. I suspect Lucy and Adam will want their own place as well. This is temporary and I haven’t stuck you with anything.’
‘Pippa, I didn’t mean…’ He tugged away and raked his hair again. ‘Last night…’
‘No,’ she said evenly. ‘You did mean. But we’re mature adults. We don’t need to let one night mess with our working relationship. And you don’t need to see me as the bad guy in what’s happened.’
‘I don’t. Of course I don’t. But… You seriously think we can work together?’ And this was the other non-negotiable. He had a daughter. She wanted to work in Whale Cove. ‘I want to be a Flight-Aid nurse,’ she said, flatly and definitely. ‘I’ll do whatever that takes, Riley Chase, including never again thinking about what happened last night. Agreed?’
‘There’s no choice.’
‘Of course there’s a choice,’ she said, and she managed to smile. ‘You can walk out that door right now. Pick up your minimal baggage and your surfboard and walk away.’ She glanced around the bare walls with distaste. ‘It’ll be just as it was before you arrived-you’ll have left no trace. But I’m staying in this town. For now I’m here to take care of Amy, and if you go then I’ll look after Lucy and Adam, too. Because…’
She squared her shoulders and she made herself sound a lot stronger than she felt. ‘Because, do you know, I want those ties,’ she said. ‘I want pictures on my walls. I want mess, baggage, a sense of belonging. Being a Flight-Aid nurse… it’s what I’ve been wanting for a long time and I won’t let it go. It feels like home.’
‘It’s a job.’
‘It’s home,’ she said stubbornly. ‘So now… I can see some flowers growing on the cliff face. I have no idea what they are but I’m heading out to pick a bunch. Then I intend to try and make a chocolate cake. I’m the world’s worst cook but it feels like the right thing to do. I may only be in this house for a couple of weeks but from this moment on… as long as I’m working for Flight-Aid then I’m home.’
He was called out that night and it was almost a relief.
He wasn�
��t supposed to be on duty. Jake and Sue-Ellen and Mardi were on call over the weekend, but at four in the morning Jake rang.
‘Fisherman off the rocks at Devil’s Teeth,’ he said. ‘Wife’s only just contacted the police. He was due home at dusk. What was she thinking, waiting this long? Cops have found his gear washed up on the rocks-looks like he was hit by a wave, swept straight in. Sue-Ellen says she can’t hack it. Going down ropes, getting bodies… She’s hit a wall. She’ll do it if you can’t, but she’s asking…’
It was almost a relief. He’d been lying in bed staring at the ceiling, trying not to think how close Pippa was. Yes, there was a bedroom between them, but that was two thin walls away. If he lay still he could imagine her breathing.
He wouldn’t mind betting she was staring at the ceiling as well, and when he dressed and headed out, he found it was a variation of a theme. She was on the veranda, staring out at the ocean.
She heard his footsteps, boots on bare boards. He was in full uniform. It was a bit hard to disguise where he was headed.
‘Problem?’ She turned and she was wearing a negligee so tiny it took his breath away. Or… maybe it wasn’t exactly tiny. It reached her knees. But it clung. The moon was almost full and he could see her body silhouetted beneath the soft silk.
He had work to do. Dreadful work. He couldn’t afford to be distracted by a woman in a silk nightdress.
‘You want me to come?’ she said.
‘No need.’ He sounded brusque and tried to soften it. ‘I’m filling in for Sue-Ellen with the other crew.’
He had a couple of moments to explain. It took Mardi five minutes to get from her home to the helicopter pad. It took him two. He told her and saw her flinch.
‘So go,’ she said, and he knew she was reliving her time in the water.
‘It won’t count so much tonight,’ he said grimly. ‘He went off the rocks at Devil’s Teeth, not a calm beach like you did. For him to survive in that water for more than half an hour would be almost impossible and it’s been at least eight. There’s not a lot to be done but pick up the pieces. Go back to bed.’
‘Oh, Riley…’
‘Go back to bed.’
How could she go back to bed? She made tea, let it get cold and she didn’t notice. Things were happening inside her that she hardly understood, that she had no idea how to deal with. Riley had stood in the living room in his Flight-Aid uniform, shrugging on his sou’wester, readying himself for what lay ahead. He needed a shave. He didn’t look as if he’d slept. He looked big and bad and dangerous… only he was on the side of good.
He was off to haul a body from the sea. It was what he did.
He’d seemed more alone than anyone she’d ever met.
Things were settling inside her. Things she didn’t necessarily want.
She was falling in love.
Was that just neediness speaking? The neediness that had seen her reluctant to leave the hospital she’d trained in because that was where her friends were, and friends were the only family she’d ever truly known? The neediness that had finally had her agreeing to marry Roger, because he was her friend, she could have children, she could be part of… something?
The something she’d found here. Riley’s team. This hospital. The Outback clinic. Something that called her.
Like Riley called her. Like Riley made her feel.
She was falling…
She’d fallen.
When?
Back in hospital, when she’d woken and seen him at the end of the bed, smiling at her, reassuring her that she was solidly grounded, she was safe, the nightmare was over?
When she’d watched him tease the children at his Outback clinic, making injections a source of fun, a test of bravery that all could face?
When she’d watched him hug Joyce goodbye, his deep affection for the elderly nurse obvious to all of them?
When he’d held her in his arms and blown the terrors away with the heat of his body? When he’d made love to her with tenderness, passion, wonder?
Or when she’d watched him with his daughter, not knowing where to start but wanting so much? Needing so much.
He was on the outside looking in, she thought. For Pippa, who’d been a loner herself, it was an identity she knew too well, and maybe that was what was making her heart twist.
But it wasn’t just the one thing making her heart twist, she thought. It was all of him. The complete package. Doctor, lifesaver, father, lover.
Riley.
She thought of his face as he’d left tonight. He knew what he was facing and she knew it hurt something deep within.
Never send to know for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee…
Where had that come from? She thought about it, remembering the whole quote. Donne. No man is an island.
Riley would like to think he was an island, she decided. He did think he was an island. But if you cared as much as he did…
He couldn’t stay solitary-it was hurting too much-and if he had to be connected… Could she find a link?
He didn’t want a link. Last night shouldn’t have happened.
She hugged herself in the chill of the night and gazed out to sea a while longer. She should go back to bed.
Riley was out there, facing a nightmare.
She’d wait here until he got home.
Stupid or not… she’d wait for however long it took.
Like a lovesick teenager…
Or a woman who was starting to see exactly where her home was. Who could heal, and heal herself in the process.
Jake was already in the chopper, and Mardi arrived thirty seconds later. Ten minutes later they were hovering over Devil’s Teeth.
One look at the sea told them there was no hope for a happy outcome. Searchlights were already playing over the base of the cliff. Police were searching the rocks-cautiously as the sea was huge-but the outcome was inevitable
Two hours later, just on dawn, they found what they were looking for and it gave them no joy at all. There was no use for Riley’s medical skills. He retrieved the body, then he and Mardi worked to disguise the worst of the damage before they landed on the clifftop.
The family was waiting. The family was always waiting, Riley thought grimly, as he watched the tragedy play out. Ambulances, police cars, desolation, all the accoutrements of heartbreak.
The chopper landed but there was no surge forward. No one wanted to take the first step, to be first to acknowledge death.
And in the end Riley’s medical skills were needed. The man’s mother-in-law, an elderly Greek lady, collapsed with shock. Riley was about to board the Squirrel but the paramedics called him back. Two minutes later she arrested.
They got her back but only just.
One ambulance left with the elderly woman inside. The second ambulance drove off more slowly, carrying its sad cargo. Finally the Squirrel could leave. Mardi and Jake sat up front. Riley sat in the back and gave in to grey.
Family, he thought.
One death and the ripple effects stretched outward. He’d just watched a wife become a widow. He’d watched a mother-in-law nearly lose her life. He’d watched children and family and friends, all gutted.
He’d watched paramedics and emergency service personnel take on this load of tragedy and carry it with them. Every one of them had a family. Every one of them was exposed to the same kind of grief they’d seen tonight, the type of grief he saw over and over.
Joyce had it right, he thought. Joyce cared for the community as a whole. She put her life into working for the people she cared about, but she’d never let herself be part of that other scary thing, the thing that ripped everyone apart.
Family.
He had a daughter. A pregnant daughter. In a while he’d have a grandchild.
He was thirty-eight years old. The concept of being a grandfather was ridiculous.
It didn’t matter how old he was. The concept of being a grandparent was still ridiculous. Terrifying.
And th
en there was Pippa.
Pippa of the warm body, of the huge smile, of the heart that gave and gave. Pippa who’d given herself to him-was it only last night?
She was back at his house. His home?
Waiting for him?
No one ever waited for him. No one ever would-not if he could help it. His was a solitary world and he liked it like that.
But he had a daughter.
And Pippa was… not waiting?
His solitary world was starting to seem besieged.
CHAPTER NINE
AT DAWN Pippa helped Amy feed a still sleepy Baby Riley. Amy and baby went back to sleep. Exhausted, Pippa abandoned her sentry duty and crawled into bed. When she woke it was ten and Baby Riley was squawking for her next feed.
The jaundice might well recede without the need for phototherapy, she thought, but mostly she thought… had Riley come home?
She padded down the passage and just happened to glance into Riley’s bedroom on the way.
No Riley.
Were they still searching, or was he needed at the hospital?
She flicked on the radio to the local news and listened to the account of last night’s tragedy.
A drowning followed by a heart attack. In an understaffed hospital that could be enough to keep him busy for hours. Or was he was staying out because of her?
Was she making herself more important than she was?
Keep busy, she told herself. Don’t think about him.
Easier said than done.
She helped Amy bathe Riley Junior, encouraged her to feed again then settled them both to sleep in a patch of sunshine.
Lucy and Adam arrived. They’d walked round from their hotel. Lucy’s legs were swollen. To fly for almost twenty four hours at full term… There were reasons for regulations.
She settled Lucy on the settee, raised her legs, massaged her swollen feet, working on getting circulation happening.
Sent Adam out for supplies. Made sandwiches.
Riley still didn’t return.
The place was like home without its hearth. Maybe that was a dumb thing to think but there it was. He should be there.
The Doctor & the Runaway Heiress Page 13
