by LJ Swallow
"Not up to it?" Vee’s body hits my back as she runs at me and curls an arm around my neck. I stagger forwards due to the force, fighting to steady myself. Vee pushes her knees into the back of mine and my legs give way. This time I can’t stop myself falling as I land on my hands and knees. Autumn leaves crunch beneath my palms as they hit the hard ground and fury blackens my eyes.
Who the fuck does she think she’s messing with?
I stare downwards, head bowed, for a few seconds, listening to Vee’s breathing above me as I anticipate her next move. She doesn’t react. Is Vee worried about what she just did?
Silently, I stand and brush leaves from my knees, eyes remaining down as I watch Vee’s feet to see which way she moves.
She doesn’t.
Playing nice ends now, Verity. I charge at Vee, knocking her backwards. If this were one of the guys, I’d let him painfully hit the floor, but I manage to rein in enough of my temper to catch her weight before she lands. She lashes out at me, so I allow her to sink to the ground. Hair splayed above her head, Vee looks back in shock as I sit across her hips, pinning her to the damp earth.
My breath picks up, and I deny this is because my legs are either side and Vee’s body’s beneath me. I grip Vee’s wrists in one hand and hold her arms above her head. "I'm not a demon, Vee, I'm War and the chances you'll beat me? Zero."
Challenge remains in her expression, but with wariness added as her struggle against me stops.
I hold my face closer. "What would you do in this position?"
Her hot breath touches my cool cheek. "To you? Or a demon?"
"Me."
"That's easy," she murmurs. "If I kissed you, there's no way you could hold me here. You'd lose the ability to think straight."
She moistens her lips. We're here again. I’m so close to giving in—to her and myself. Curious to see how she’ll react, I close the last few millimetres between our mouths until my lips touch the edge of hers.
Wrong move. The soft buzz from the briefest touch electrifies and I jerk back, before the attempt to show my superiority backfires totally. I can’t mock the other three guys when I’m as spellbound as them.
I’m right; this girl has more power over me than I’m prepared to give her.
Vee might be the one immobile beneath me, but we both know who has the power in this situation.
The problem is nobody controls me. Ever.
I’ll fulfill my role around Vee, care for her as one of us, make sure she’s safe, but I refuse to yield to this power attempting to take charge of me.
I climb off Vee, and her eyes reflect my surprise. Because I moved or because our mouths touched? I step a few feet away and fold my hands beneath my arms. "I suggest you stand. I'm bored of this now."
She props herself up, hands behind on the ground, and blinks up at me. "Of course you are."
I rub my nose with the back of a hand. "Did I hurt you?"
"No." She knocks dirt from her hands and stands. "I'm fine. I told you I can look after myself." Then she winces and turns to look at her back.
"What’s wrong?" I ask and step forward.
"I think I grazed my back." She holds her shirt up at the back as I bend down to examine the area. A graze the size of my palm mars her pale skin along her lower back.
"You're bleeding."
She touches the spot and screws up her face. "Not much."
I drag a hand down my cheek. "Shit, sorry, Vee. How did that happen?"
"My clothes must’ve bunched up behind when I landed on my back. The grounds covered in stones. It’s only a graze, don’t worry."
"Yeah, but still..." I step closer and pick a stray leaf from her hair. "Sorry."
"Are you apologising to me, Xander?"
"I meant to teach you how not to get hurt, not hurt you. My job's to keep you safe."
"Really, it’s no big deal."
"Come inside, I’ll fix you up." I incline my head to the door. "We have a first aid kit, even Horsemen hurt themselves sometimes."
Is the shocked look on her face because I’m offering to tend to her grazes or because she’s still as affected by what just happened as my pounding heart is?
How much longer can I fool myself that I’m not as overwhelmed by Vee and unable to escape the effect in the way the other guys are?
11
VEE
Once inside, Xander heads to the kitchen where he reaches into an overhead cupboard and pulls out an impressive-sized box, containing enough supplies to run a small hospital ward. "Nurse in a former life?" I joke.
"If I was, I'd have better equipment." I eye the sealed packets in the first aid kit as he rummages through. "If you're hurting, I can call Joss. He has anaesthetic properties."
"I'm fine. It’s a graze, Xander. You’re overreacting."
"I’m supposed to keep you safe," he says in a low voice again. "I’m not supposed to injure you."
I agree to lying on the sofa, when that’s clearly not necessary either, confused by his intensity. If hurting me is a big no, then why try hand-to-hand combat? "You didn’t do anything deliberately."
"My temper took over. I shouldn’t lose control around you." Xander kneels on the floor holding a folded white cloth and puts a small brown bottle on the carpet. "Let me see."
I pull my shirt upwards, exposing the side of my back. He sets down the bottle and cloth, then his long fingers move along my skin. He avoids touching the cut, but sets my skin alight.
"That’s a pretty nasty graze. Didn’t you feel it happen?"
"I guess I was oblivious in the heat of the moment. Fight, I mean." His steady look contains the hidden Xander, and I attempt the same. Oh, you know, because you sitting on top of and almost kissing me phased out everything but the thought of how your lips would feel.
Xander on his knees in front of me? I laugh to myself.
"What's funny?" he asks.
"You're being friendly."
"I am friendly. When I want to be." He reaches on the floor for the small bottle, unscrews and tips the clear liquid onto a white cloth.
I've heard from the other guys how an innate desire to protect me overrides everything. I'd suspected Xander's personality interfered with that need, and I was merely a necessary link in the chain. I'd convinced myself that, to Xander, I wasn't someone to be protected, instead that he wanted me out there, doing whatever I'd been created for, straightaway.
I was wrong.
Xander moves his head closer to my body, and I jerk as he wipes the cloth over the cut.
"Omigod, Xander!" I half shriek as the skin stings.
"Jesus, Xander!" calls a voice, and the lounge door slams shut. "Seriously, you have a bedroom if you're going to be such a hypocrite."
I sit, my shirt falling back down and see a thunderous-faced Heath watching.
Xander sits back on his haunches. "Huh?"
"I... fell and grazed myself. Xander's fixing me up."
Heath's mouth opens. "Oh. I just heard you and saw him with his head—"
"I have my clothes on, Heath," I interrupt. "You have one hell of an imagination."
"I couldn't see properly from the doorway. Guess I jumped to conclusions."
Xander laughs loudly. "If me and Vee was even a possibility, do you think we're stupid enough to do that shit where you guys can find us? Surely you and her stick to your bedroom."
I shove Xander in the shoulder. "I haven't been in Heath's bedroom. Only Joss's."
Xander's eyebrows shoot up. "With Joss in the bed?"
"Yes." Crap. "Not like that. Ask Ewan."
"He was there too? Both guys and you in Joss's bed?" Xander mock gasps and places a hand over his mouth. "Verity, you shock me."
I poke my tongue into my cheek and lean forward, my face almost touching his. "Why? Did you want to be there too, Xander?"
"Are you for real? You had a threesome with Joss and Ewan? Man..."
"No! Not even close," I reply.
"Yeah, if it were me I wouldn't b
e sharing you." He moistens his lips and looks at my mouth. "I'd be enough for you on my own."
"What's he saying, Vee?" asks Heath. "You look pissed off."
I shake my head and stand. "Can I just say something? I get that this is a weird situation between the five of us, but drop the snarky attitude, Xander."
"Honestly, not my problem if you want to share yourself, but leave me off the list. I don't share my girls."
"I'm not being shared," I snap. "I'm not a thing. I make my own decisions."
"So you do want a threesome?" asks Xander. "Or more?"
"No, I do not. But we all know this is complicated. You're the one who’s annoyed with dancing around subjects. I'm being straight up about how I feel."
Xander looks over at Heath. "How do you feel about your girlfriend telling you she wants other men?"
"And there I was thinking you weren't an asshole today. Are you listening to anything I say here? I'm not his girlfriend for a start."
"Oh yeah, I hear you loud and clear." Xander stands too. "But we're not all under your spell, sweetheart."
"No?" I step closer. "Really?"
He leans in to whisper, "I'd happily take you to bed and fuck you, but that's it. Things would be out of my system, but you'll want more."
"Sure," I whisper back with a disbelieving snort.
"Why not try me and see?" he hisses.
His challenge elevates my heart rate as much as his fierce words. "Maybe one day I will."
A slow smile snakes across Xander's face as he steps back. "Maybe if everybody gets this sex bullshit over with, we can drop the tension and get on with our job." He turns to Heath. "Speaking of which, we need to debrief about the activities at The Warehouse last night, and I need full details about what you and Joss found on your hunt."
At the mention of last night, I drop my challenge.
"We didn’t find anything, Xander. I told you," replies Heath.
"Don’t care. Things to discuss. Meeting. Five minutes." He shoves the cloth and bottle at Heath. "You finish helping, Vee. I’ve more important shit to do than this." Xander strides to the door, passed his brother, and I blink in confusion as he heads out.
Heath rubs his face. "That escalated quickly."
"War? Escalated quickly? Are you surprised?" I'm stunned by his whiplash-inducing change in attitude to me. One minute he's concerned and helping me out, the next... this. The man cannot handle anybody disagreeing with him. Talk about attitude.
Heath crosses towards me and cups my cheek. "What happened exactly?"
"Xander was showing me some self-defence and I fell."
Heath frowns. "He should be more careful."
"I like that Xander doesn't treat me as if I'm fragile."
"Vee, how many times do I have to say this? I think we're programmed to keep you safe, somehow. Even Xander; I bet he’s feeling like shit right now. Probably why he’s so pissed off."
"But I have powers; you don’t need to look after me." A memory from last night flickers across my eyes, and I blink it away.
"But you don’t understand or control them yet."
"Yet. But it's a balance. I want the opportunity to show I'm capable of being your equal and I’m not a delicate girl."
Heath smiles and cups my cheek, placing a soft kiss on my lips. "I'm still going to treat you like one, sorry."
I grit my teeth against more unwarranted fussing. Until I can prove otherwise, their attitude to me won't change. Following my experience last night, I need to get my hands on a demon and show the guys what I’m capable of. I'll figure out exactly how powerful I am; then God help anybody who tries to harm me again.
12
HEATH
Vee's insistence she gives notice she’s leaving her job, rather than never returning amuses me, but she's serious. Xander doesn't comment beyond the fact I'm instructed to go with her as safety in numbers for Vee's one-week notice period.
Two days to go.
I don't see Vee at work, but her appearance at the end of each day worries me. Despite her not fitting in at the company, even after three years, Vee always smiles and exchanges polite conversation with people. Nowadays, she's distracted; the strain of the last few days caught up. She’s focusing on her phone as she walks toward me now. I understand that trick, stops people talking when you want to stay quiet. I spent the last five minutes doing the same.
"Are you okay?" I ask as we leave the building. "Is this too much?"
Vee shrugs her bag onto a shoulder. "I feel weird here, like I don't belong anymore."
I resist telling her she doesn't, instead taking her hand and squeezing. "I think this will be easier once we move on. We use the house as a base and will be back, but policing the world can't be done from a small town in Oxfordshire."
She gives a weak smile. "I bet. So we're still headed north?"
"I think so. Once we clear up the mess round here." I chew my lip. She might not want to hear this. "We might need to head overseas at some point."
"Overseas?" Her eyes widen. "But I've never been further than Spain when I was a kid..." She trails off. "Or I thought so. Why?"
"The supernatural threat doesn't limit itself to a small island in Europe. Or even to the Western world, although the biggest control exists amongst the powerful countries. Once the demons take hold of the powerful countries, controlling the rest is simple."
We reach my car and Vee pauses. "Are we any closer to tracking down the demons who got away at the club the other night?"
Ewan's obsession with finding and ending the succubi gang is unusual for him. He took down one at the club, Xander two more, but not before being told there's a gang living in the area. Fury followed him home that night when the one he knew was still in the club got away. Why is Vee bothered too?
Ewan tends to get pissed off with us for wasting time on small fry when we should be focusing on the big guys. I get that but, as Xander also argues, if we let the low-level demons out of control, they'll see the world as ripe for the picking. Ewan insists this time we make examples of them. He's probably right.
"Joss and Xander headed out today to talk to some local vampires who've indicated they've seen their sex-starved rivals around. To be honest, I think the vamps would deal with the threat themselves if we left the two sides alone."
We climb into the car and her scent from the bodywash she leaves in the bathroom reaches me, along with images of Vee in the shower. My room's next to the bathroom, and not only have I listened to the water trickle and daydreamed, I've also encountered her dressed in just a towel.
Crap. Even the thought arouses me. I shift uncomfortably.
"What's wrong?" she asks.
"Nothing." I start the car. "If they locate the gang, we’re going in tonight to clear them out."
"Good. I think it would be good practice. Xander's taught me more attack moves. Ewan agrees that starting with simple enemies would be better than confronting more powerful ones." Vee stares ahead, mouth thinning. "I want to do this. I want them dead."
Whoa. I study her lined face. "They’re not worth wasting more than a knife blade on. They're pathetic. Weak."
"Some of us don't have the experience you do," she snaps at me. "If I kill them I'll know I can always defend myself."
Her harsh tone doesn't sound like Vee. Maybe she's spending too much time around Xander, and he's filling her head with ideas that brute force is the way to go. "Wow, okay."
She turns a smile to me, but her eyes hold something different, adding to the stress surrounding her. "Maybe I can try both. Blind them, then stab them."
I laugh. "Perhaps you can, if your power triggers."
Vee's quiet much of the journey home until we approach the house, tyres crunching on gravel as I slow to approach the house. "Why do you still work at Alphanet?" she asks. "You could've left once you found me."
"So could you."
"I am leaving."
I tap my fingers on the steering wheel. "I like some normality occasion
ally. When we're around here, I almost feel like I have a home. In a weird way, having a job in the real world felt good. I get sick of being on the road."
Vee chews her lip as she looks at me. "Aren't you happy with being who you are?"
What do I say? That I struggle some days because I want more? That I see the real human world around me and crave to be part of it? I fight against my human side, remind myself I'm Death and don't belong. I wasn't born into a family, but thrown into a weird brotherhood with no memory of my past.
"Sometimes I want my reality to be different too," I reply. "As you may've noticed, saving the world is hard work. I like downtime."
"Working at a boring telecommunications company?"
"Spending time with a girl who's the centre of my world." I shake my head. Shit. "Literally. You know what I mean."
"I do." She places a hand on my leg and squeezes. "You want a girl to date. Someone ordinary. A relationship."
"Not really." You. I want you. So bloody much. "Just a different reality."
"Do the others know you feel like this?"
"I think we all do occasionally. Even Xander. He gets pissed off with me because sometimes I get too distracted by what he calls my sulking."
"Hah. You all spend time at pubs and clubs and hook up with girls. I think you have plenty of human in your life."
"Yeah, but that's not the same, Vee."
My words close down the conversation, and when I glance at her, there's a sadness in her downturned mouth. I mentally kick myself. By sharing my struggles, have I reminded her of what she thought was true and what she lost?
13
VEE
Heath parks his car on a suburban street as we did when we visited Portia, but this time the fancy houses and perfect gardens are missing. This street is at the back of a sprawling council estate, where broken cars sit on the road rather than upmarket models on driveways.
Nowadays, the residents are a mix of the original council residents and those who've bought the houses. Most are rentals, including the one we're eyeing up now with overgrown front lawn and dirty windows.
