The door swings open, and my gaze darts up as Jude releases a slow, dark grin. Before the worst of them can get his hands on me, I smirk, and he passes right through me the second he lunges.
I strut out in my untouchable form, now feeling as though I have control, and I grin at them as they all barge into the room. I feel the glares before I see all four of them.
“Guess what, boys? I just leveled up.” As soon as the words leave my mouth, I force the flesh to return, even as I wobble a little.
The second they move, I turn back, grinning as my untouchable phase offers me a fuck-you shield.
“What the actual hell?” Jude asks, slinging broken pool sticks around as he angrily stalks out of the closet.
I turn to flash a grin at him over my shoulder. “It’s amazing how much survival instincts aide a girl when she needs them most.”
His grin slowly forms when I feel the pressure of gravity again, and I curse, wobbling until I crash into a strong body. Two arms come around me, and warm breath fans against my ear.
“What was that?” Ezekiel asks in a taunting whisper as he rips my shirt open.
It takes a lot of effort, but I manage to shift again, and I pass through his hands, blowing out a relieved breath.
“Fucking savages,” I accuse, pointing at all of them as I start backing out of the room on my good legs instead of those stupid real legs.
“It’s cute the way you act like you don’t want it now that you can have it,” Gage tells me.
Four wicked grins stay fixed to their devilishly tempting faces. “No,” I say loudly. “Not happening. You don’t all get to kiss me stupid so that I forget I sort of hate your ungrateful asses.”
“We’re not going to kill you, Keyla,” Ezekiel says, moving closer. “We just want to make those fantasies of yours come true.”
“Ha! Worst pickup line ever,” I lie, hoping they don’t hear that pathetic little tremor of hesitation in my voice.
After all, I did spend a lot of time thinking of little else. I’m starting to realize there are far more important things in life.
I flicker back to flesh before I manage to strain and concentrate on staying untouchable. It’s getting harder to do now. It’s like my body demands a little time in its new form, and I’m denying it.
“She can’t hold it much longer,” Jude says with a deviant spark in his eye, just ready to pounce.
A very important thought occurs to me, and I feel like an idiot for not thinking of it sooner. I’m going to blame it on the fact I finally have adrenaline, and it makes you super durable, but hella stupid.
If I’ve seen a place before, I can zap myself there. Well, maybe not all the way to hell, but definitely to Purgatory and anywhere in range within the states.
A grin curves my lips. And if I’m whole…I might not need their presence to exist. Which means I can go anywhere without them. Seems like the perfect time to test that theory.
“If you really want to touch me, you have to woo me.” I say this with a straight face, but I almost cringe when I hear the words aloud in one fluent sentence.
They all give me an incredulous look.
“Woo you?” Jude finally asks, his eyebrows arched in utter confusion, as though it’s the most preposterous thing he’s ever heard.
“Yes. If I’m going to be sticking around until I know for certain the devil isn’t going to strike you dead, then I might as well be getting some perks before I leave the four of you to continue on in your hellish ways. I’ll get the four of you, and you’ll get my protection. Then we’ll part ways, and I’ll go find my one true love, while the four of you move back on to your harem of women.”
“Harem?” Gage asks, a sardonic curve to his lips.
I flicker between forms again, but manage to hold on a little longer. I need to get this all out.
“Harem is an interesting choice of word, considering you’re the one getting four of us at once, while we only get you,” Ezekiel points out with a devious twist of his lips.
“Yes, you’ll be my harem. Deal with it. I’m the only one who gets access to you for the duration of however short our time left together may be. In return, I get the ultimate experience to start my new life out with a bang.”
I flicker again, sucking in a breath as I strain harder.
“Start your new life out with a bang. Again, interesting choice of words,” Ezekiel states with that same infuriating expression.
“I get my fantasy,” I go on, not letting him deter me, since my time is very limited for how much longer I can hold the new form back.
“All the things you’ve done to coerce a woman—”
“Seduce a woman,” Gage interrupts, smirking. “Not coerce.”
“—into bed with you,” I continue, not acknowledging the interruption. “I get that. All of it. Everything I’ve had to watch over the past five years.”
“Five years? Before we even get sex? I can’t even count the number of women who’ve been in here in that span of time,” Kai growls, as though I’m ludicrous.
I open my mouth to speak, but Jude waves his hand. “No need to recite the number, comoara trădătoare,” he says, his accent subtly shifting to one I can’t pinpoint on the last two words.
“What did you just call me?” I ask, then shake my head when I remember I’m on a timer here. “Never mind. Not the important part,” I go on calmly.
“I want five-and-a-half years of seduction, and not just the touching kind. Roses. Jewelry. Fancy dinners. All of it. I want the same amount you did for them crammed into the limited amount of time we have.”
“High maintenance little piece of ass, aren’t you?” Kai asks with an eyebrow arch.
I point a finger at him. “You’ll be lucky if you get to do more than watch. I’m the one getting to be selfish in the bedroom, while selflessly risking my life for you and following around your ungrateful asses.”
Another flicker that I force back has me taking a deep breath, that fortunately helps to calm me. Bonus.
The other three guys just grin over at Kai.
“It’d almost be worth it just to see you suffer,” Jude states, his grin growing.
Kai snarls at him, and then turns his glare on me.
“You’ll change your mind.”
“Highly unlikely,” I dutifully point out. “If you want to touch me while I protect you, because I’ll be protecting you regardless, then you need to remember how very important it is to woo me. The sex will happen naturally and at my speed, while the wooing continues in between bouts of it. And I’ll let you do almost anything to me. As long as my fantasies get put out for me as well.”
“We’ve had a taste. What happens if you leave and we start losing our minds the way E did already?” Gage asks, a very scary look on his face that has me questioning my confidence. I’d say it had me questioning my sanity, but that went years ago.
“I thought we agreed we weren’t going to touch her for that very reason,” Jude points out as though he’s being reasonable and accusatory in the same breath.
“You felt it. You went after her too,” Gage tells him without looking away from me.
“You were just too slow,” Kai adds, smirking as he darts a taunting look toward Jude.
Jude’s jaw clenches, and he forces his eyes back to me. “I take it back. It wouldn’t be almost worth it. It’s definitely worth it. Sign me up. Tell me how many fucking roses or bracelets you want. Who gives a damn if we’re stuck with you for all eternity? As long as Kai suffers, I’ll sign eternity over.”
Kai flips him off, and I give Jude a dubious look, even as I flicker in and out of flesh, working even harder to force it back this time.
“If it is a long-lasting issue, which I highly doubt, we’ll find out how long you can be without me, and I’ll return at the end of that span. No touching during those times,” I quickly add. “My body like this works just fine in reeling you in from that mad edge. We can go on without ever crossing a line again, and I can be
loyal to my one true love.”
“I’m sure he’d be just fine with you coming to see your real-girl-christening quad every so often so we can get our fix,” Kai states flatly.
They truly are exasperating.
“I rescind the offer. You’re making it too complicated.”
I turn to leave, and Gage darts in front of me, passing through me, and causing me to lose my hold for a moment.
He immediately pins me against the wall, and for the first time, I feel trapped, unable to simply pass through him. His eyes drift over my face as he lifts a hand and fingers a lock of my hair.
His other hand fists against the wall like it’s taking a concentrated amount of effort not to touch me in any other way. I finally manage to force the form back, and his hand slips through my body, ghosting those tingles throughout me that has me straining twice as hard.
I stay in my place, even as he continues to loom over me.
“Uncomplicate it,” he says, even though it looks like he hates the words.
“I know nothing else about this world than the four of you. Outside of my fantasies, I don’t even know what goals are to be had. I’m asking you to take care of me in all ways, and ease me out there. I can’t tell you how many times I was tempted to give into the fade, to stop fighting so hard for so little. I didn’t survive this long just to fall into the world with blinders on and get myself killed before I get to live. The tradeoff is me and my devout protection, though as I said, you’re protected regardless.”
“Sounds very meager as far as comparisons go. If you’re protecting us regardless, despite the fact we’ve survived just fine for many, many years without you, then all we really get is to sex you up and fulfill your fantasies,” Jude states dryly.
A hint of a grin forms on my lips.
“Gage was only with Ezekiel. They could have both taken me, if you know what I mean,” I state with dark humor in my eyes.
Kai’s smile falters, and Jude’s eyes narrow.
“I could have had her too, and there was no one in the room besides me,” Kai grinds out, cracking his neck to the side.
I hold Jude’s gaze as I remind him, “You can’t have any other girl without each other in the room. Except me. You can have me individually, and share when you want to share. That’s the tradeoff.”
His entire expression blanks, like he doesn’t want me to see anything in his eyes or his features to clue me in on where his mind goes. Kai shoves Gage away, taking his place as he gets in front of me.
“What’s my incentive if you’re icing me out?” he asks coldly.
“Work for it, and who knows, maybe I’ll let you have me too,” I say with a false bravado that wavers on the end.
Sheesh, he’s really gorgeous when that intense stare is on you because he wants what he can’t have. It has me questioning just how weak I might actually be once this thing gets started.
He pushes off. “I’m not in,” Jude finally says with a shrug. “Individually, we’ll get greedy, selfish, even combative. Look at what happened to E. I say we stick to how things have been, and you learn not to be in front of us in flesh. Otherwise, we’ll ask you to leave permanently. If you stay, that precious life of yours might just end before it truly begins.”
It’s always Jude who cuts the deepest. I’m not sure why I keep expecting anything else.
It’s like it sobers all of them, and I see the renewed determination in their eyes.
“Then we go on as we have been. Stay out of my room,” I say tightly.
“Don’t tell us where you’ll be,” Kai groans, raking a hand over his face. “We don’t do well with temptation.”
“Fine.”
I zap myself to the basement where they never go, and finally stagger in my new physical form, collapsing to a couch. I had planned on leaving the estate to keep them away from me. I’m not quite as irresistible in reality as I was in fantasy.
I also had no idea this level of exhaustion could exist.
If I’m a gift from Lilith, that means I lose something each time I earn something new. What if I have to fight this form more and more to keep my untouchable one? Or what if I lose something else that has been instrumental to my survival?
The comfort that encompasses me when I snuggle up with a blanket has me smiling despite the ache they left in my stomach. My life has revolved around them for so long, that I’m truly quite worried I won’t know how to exist without them.
And they’re never going to do more than tolerate me.
This snuggly blanket really is a miracle cure for staving off stupid tears.
When my stomach suddenly growls, I’m very freaking distracted from all thoughts of guys. It growls again, and a pang accompanies it.
Then a slow grin spreads across my face as I glance to the basement kitchenette, staring at the fridge. Though they never actually come down here and stay down here, they do use that fridge for storing leftovers a lot.
In the next instant, I’m wobbling on unsteady legs all the way to the fridge. As I’m scrambling to pull out a box of pizza, a thought occurs to me.
It might have been a little harder for them to turn down the offer if I had been wearing something sexier than the Pinocchio outfit.
My mind turns to mush when I bite into the pizza, feeling something so satisfying ignite in my mouth with a touch of surprise and savoring flavor. A little cold on the teeth, which I hadn’t anticipated, since I’ve never felt cold before.
Yet I know what it is, so I can assume I’ve felt cold and forgotten it. Even the pizza seems familiar, in a unique, sensory sort of way.
It almost startles me when I realize that the moan in the room is coming from me. If pizza is making me moan, then I can only imagine what it would feel like to have an orgasm.
Pizza still in my mouth, I touch my stomach, feeling a grin light my features as a surge of excitement bursts through me.
I can touch myself.
I practically inhale the rest of the pizza, then grab a glass of water to choke it all down as fast as I can. It’s not pretty, but it sure as hell works.
I try to make my clothes change, but it doesn’t happen. So I just tear them off and toss them aside, still working on unsteady legs.
I drop back down to the couch, my hand trembling as I slide it down my body. Even my touch is almost too much. My memory from the first time Ezekiel was watered down by my mind to keep me from missing it so much.
My mind goes back to all the women they asked to do this so they could watch. It sounds creepier than it is.
It was actually really hot.
And informative.
Half of it is immediate instinct when my fingers brush over the very sensitive clit I completely underestimated. My eyes flutter shut, and those fantasies flash through my mind.
In my head, they said yes, and Ezekiel is already starting me out by sucking my nipples.
I use my free hand to try and mimic how I think it might feel, and it’s like a shot to my lower body. Biting down on my lip so as not to make too much noise, I start slow circles, imagining Gage’s face between my thighs as he works that glorious mouth of his on me.
My imagination kicks it up a notch by letting Jude kiss me while Ezekiel continues on with his mouth. And I have Kai in the corner, watching me, his hand stroking slowly, matching a rhythm I’ve requested.
It’s so much more intense when I can actually feel the physical touch and the overwhelming sensations crossing over me all at once.
I immediately know what an orgasm is when one crashes into me so forcefully that I’m forced to arch, my toes involuntarily curling as an unbidden, rasp cry is pulled from my throat.
When I open my eyes, they cross, and the sound of my panted breaths resonate in my ears as I try to breathe normally again. A stupid, uncontrollable smile spreads across my lips, and I stretch, feeling remarkably less stressed and addictively relaxed.
If that’s an orgasm, I’m going to have as many as I possibly can until the day I di
e.
It’s so much better than I imagined, even though there is a small, annoyingly hollow feeling stealing a little of my high.
That pizza sounds good right now, so I sit up, planning to eat another slice before round two.
But I freeze.
All four of them are perched up on the stairs or walls, staring. Jude’s hands are gripping the banister so hard that there are indentions on the cracking wood.
Ezekiel has his hands clenched in fists, and it looks like he wants to strangle me.
Kai is leveling me with a look that is equal parts murderous and captivating as his arms cross over his chest.
Gage is gripping the bar, and he’s the first to turn and look away.
Now I know what it’s like to have an audience you’re unaware of. It’s a little embarrassing. And terrifying, in my case.
“Hide better,” Jude finally says through a sardonic, annoyed grin before he walks down the rest of the stairs and pushes out through the basement door that leads to the outside on this side of the house.
“Okay,” I manage to say on a rasp whisper.
By some miracle, I manage to go ghost and zap myself to the woods. I pick a new outfit while in this form before zapping to the waterfall just beyond here. The new whole form takes over as soon as I end up on the smooth rocks.
That are slippery.
A laughing scream is jerked out of me when I slip off the rocks and land in the cool water that feels…amazing. My eyes open in wonder as I look around, taking it all in.
The white silk gown turns out to be a terrible choice. It’s clingy as hell and very transparent in the water.
But I don’t care.
It’s just me out here, and I’m fairly shameless as I pick out a perfect boulder to lie down on for my next orgasm.
Chapter 23
Fun fact: orgasms don’t get old. However, I’m already desperate to graduate to a two-person orgasm.
Yes, I think about more than sex. But imagine discovering sex for the very first time. I’ve read about teenagers, so I don’t feel one bit ashamed about my current obsession.
Four Psychos (The Dark Side Book 1) Page 15
