by Julie Benson
She squeezed Ella’s hand, stood, and grabbed the notepad and pen by the phone. When she returned, Cassie placed the items on the table. “I know you didn’t want to write answers for the hospital staff, and it’s okay if you don’t want to now.”
Ella eyed her suspiciously.
“Let me explain why I’m bringing it up now. I’ll get whatever you want for breakfast. I just need to know what that is. I can keep asking questions until I guess the right thing, or you can write down what you want. It’s your choice, and I’m fine with whatever you decide.”
Cassie slid the items closer to Ella. Then to give her time and space to think, Cassie retrieved the garbage can and paper towels to tackle the mess. Without once glancing at Ella, Cassie threw away the big chunks of the bowl, cleaned up gooey oatmeal clumps, and swept the floor to clean up any glass shards. That done, she returned to her niece. The paper and pen remained where she left them. As she tried to decide her next move, Ella’s hand slid closer to the pen. When her niece picked the pen up and the paper and started writing, Cassie bit her lip to keep from cheering.
Every painful, heart-wrenching moment this morning had been worth it to arrive here.
Cassie’s hand shook as she accepted Ella’s note.
Starbuks. Hot choclit and punkin bred.
Cassie glanced at the microwave. Seven-fifty. They were late, so screw it. “Starbucks it is.”
A half an hour later when she dropped Ella off at school, Ms. Stinson, the twenty-something office assistant with curly red hair and jet black nails seated behind the front desk, frowned and asked the reason Ella was tardy.
“I’ll be honest,” Cassie said. “She had a tough time getting up.”
Ms. Stinson filled out a tardy form, tore off the top copy and handed the yellow slip to Ella. Then Cassie hugged her niece, kissed the top of her head, and told her to have a fantastic day.
After Ella left, but before Cassie could escape, Ms. Stinson told her to have a seat. “Principal Dittman said if Ella was tardy again I should tell her so she could talk to you.”
Damn, but Cassie had no one else to blame. She’d made her choice and now she’d pay the price. Thirty years old and called into the principal’s office. Something told her the experience wouldn’t be any more pleasant than when she was a kid.
Chapter Six
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Ten minutes later Cassie sat in her car in the school parking lot and told herself she wouldn’t cry. So much for nowhere to go but up. Who would’ve thought there was something below hitting rock bottom?
She glanced at the dashboard clock. Only eight-thirty in the morning and she felt as if she’d gone six rounds with Mohammed Ali at the height of his career.
The principal’s words hammered in Cassie’s ears. While we understand Ella has certain issues that need to be taken into account, she must adhere to the attendance standards all students are held to. Any more unexcused absences or tardies and we’ll be forced to contact the authorities.
As if things hadn’t been tough enough, now the threat of truancy court hung over their heads. Cassie’s hands clenched the steering wheel, and her body tensed at the anger surging through her. She was a smart woman with the talent and fortitude to make a career in the New York art world. Why weren’t those skills transferring to dealing with Ella? How could getting a child ready and to school on time be so difficult?
Instead of improving, their situation appeared to be worsening, but then everything she tried to do since arriving had been that way. Meals. Homework. Bedtime. How did parents do it day after day? Why didn’t they say to hell with it, crawl into bed, and pull the covers over their heads?
Maybe it was just her. That she didn’t have what it took to be a parent. Not everyone did. After all, she didn’t dream of having children. She wasn’t even sure she possessed a biological clock, but here she was with one to raise.
We get the life we get, and it’s up to us to make the most of it. No trades. No do overs. No backsies.
She had two choices. She could give up and wallow in self-pity, or she could get over it and make the best of this new life.
No way would she choose the first one. Not when she had Ella to consider. That left getting over it. Starting right now. She’d begun the morning excited about returning to the lake to take pictures and sketch. That was exactly what she’d do. She’d focus on her work and recapture the creative excitement she’d felt yesterday. Then she could tackle Ella’s school issues. Vowing to turn her day around, she started her car and headed for Ty’s ranch.
A few minutes later, after parking in Ty’s driveway, she scooped up her canvas work bag containing her digital camera, sketchbook, and pencils and set off walking. The gentle breeze rustled the leaves and brushed her skin, leaving her feeling as if it had carried away part of her burdens. Within five minutes her head cleared. The physical movement energized her, making her realize how much she missed yoga classes. She’d been active lately, but not in the way that worked her body and relieved stress. Yet another aspect of her life that needed to get back on track.
One thing at a time. She put one foot in front of the other and kept moving the way she had every day since she’d come to Wishing.
Just keep swimming, swimming. She smiled thinking Dory’s mantra from the movie Finding Nemo that she and Ella watched yesterday. That fish had the right idea. As long as she kept moving she wouldn’t sink. Not a bad philosophy to live by.
As Cassie retraced yesterday’s path taking pictures the quiet, occasionally interrupted by the distant mooing cows or a bird’s song, surrounded her and soothed her battered nerves. Everything was so green—the grass, the trees, the hills. She’d grown so accustomed to the gray of the city the vivid color almost overwhelmed her, but in a good way. She wandered toward the lake and plopped down on a dock, staring across the shimmering, blue water.
As she stared at the house where she now lived, she wondered how she’d ever make it, or any other dwelling, a home for Ella. Stop it. Don’t let those worries weigh you down. Just keep swimming, swimming. Oh, no. I’m turning into Dory.
Cassie’s gaze turned to the horizon where she spotted a horse and rider on the hill silhouetted against the bright Texas sky.
She couldn’t see the rider’s features, but she knew it was Ty. Though she didn’t know how she just knew.
If she didn’t know better, she’d swear he was stalking her. Not sure she wanted anyone’s company, much less Ty’s, she considered heading for her car, but her stubbornness kicked in. She was here first and she refused to drop her tail between her legs and run because he showed up.
Even at this distance, Ty radiated strength. It was in his carriage and the way he moved on top of the animal. A matched set. She’d never understood the lure of the west, or why so many women went all warm and gooey inside over cowboys. But sitting here now, she realized the confidence that made him stubborn and frustrating also made him step up and take control of a situation as he had when she’d been overwhelmed with arrangements and details after the accident. His strength, his certainty in his values and what needed to be done, and his presence had offered a calming reassurance.
She thought about the men who’d come and gone in her life. While she’d enjoyed their company, had even thought she loved a couple, the relationships never lasted. When life got too complicated, they moved on, and she hadn’t really minded. But Ty had stuck with her through the worst time in her life, and they weren’t even involved.
Okay. Maybe now I get the whole cowboy appeal. If only she could sit and admire him from a distance their relationship would be much easier.
The need to capture the image of him on horseback made her palms itch as her pencil flew over the paper mixing the images in front of her with ones from memory, his chiseled features and his burning gaze as he rode closer. Excitement flooding her system, as she visualized capturing the image in a sculpture—maybe in wood with a little metal flashed. Oh, this could be good. Very good.
&nbs
p; When he reached her, he slid off his horse in one long, fluid motion and settled on the dock beside her. He wasn’t close enough to invade her personal space, and yet he did. The man possessed a way of coming in and taking over, probably woven into his DNA like his height and eye color. “How’s your Monday going?”
“As fine as the weather,” she said with so much Katie Couric perkiness she wanted to wince. Maybe he wouldn’t notice how hard she was trying to convince him. “On such a beautiful morning how could I be anything but wonderful sitting here? Yup, I’m as right as rain. Fit as a fiddle.”
Could she put more clichés in there? She pinched her lips together to stop her insane chatter.
“It is a pretty day.”
“I took pictures to reference later, but I couldn’t resist sitting down to sketch,” she said as she fidgeted with her pencil. “The lighting on the lake is too good to pass up.”
“The lake has inspired a few artists over the years.”
It’s not the lake that inspired me. You did.
Where had that thought come from and how did she make it go away?
He leaned toward her, trying to get a look at her sketchpad. She yanked the tablet against her chest. No way was she letting him see she’d been sketching him, and not as a distant rider, but a close up view showing every inch of his handsome face.
“I don’t like anyone seeing my rough sketches. I don’t mind people seeing my paintings in progress, but not my drawings.” Blushing, and cursing her body for its reaction to him, she closed the book and shoved it in her bag. Then she chewed on her lip and wondered if she should bring up his job offer, but how did a person launch into a topic like that?
I know I told you yesterday that I didn’t need a pity job, but I’ve changed my mind. I realized I can’t afford to hang onto my pride.
Start small and ease into the issue. “I want to thank you again for taking Ella riding yesterday. It was good to see her having fun. I think it helped her forget for a little while. She hasn’t been able to do that much lately.”
“People are figuring out what cowboys have always known. Problems look a lot smaller and the world a whole lot brighter from on top of a horse.”
“I’ll have to remember that.” Get on with it. Quit stalling and talk to him about the job. Deciding to dive right in, she grabbed a deep breath and gazed into his coffee brown eyes. “I’m sorry I was rude yesterday when you offered me the job. I think it was just such a shock hearing that it could take months to get an offer for the inn and even then it might not be a good one. That threw me off, and then you shocked me even more offering me a job.” Her voice trailed off, and she focused on a tree over his right shoulder.
Don’t look in his eyes. You lose the ability to put together a coherent thought when you do.
“I wasn’t at my best yesterday either.”
She nodded, his admission putting more at ease. “I thought things over last night. I don’t care why you made the offer. I’ll take the job. I need to pay the bills to keep a roof over Ella’s head.”
Holding held her breath she sat frozen while he remained stiff and silent beside her. What if he retracted the offer? Then what would she do? She sneaked a peak at him, but couldn’t read anything in his hooded gaze.
He was always so in control. Didn’t anything ever get to him?
“Just so there aren’t any misunderstandings your duties will be to manage the inn,” Ty said and she resisted the urge to collapse in relief. “That means everything from getting the rooms ready for guests, to being there to greet them, and making their stay pleasant. Check out the city’s website so you’re familiar with the town’s tourist activities. People often asked Chloe for suggestions. From what I hear you’ve been to almost every food joint in town, so recommending restaurants shouldn’t be a problem.”
“See, every cloud has a silver lining,” she teased. What was it with the clichés today? Nerves. Just being around this cowboy made her nervous.
“I know Chloe put a lot of her business information on her computer. Have you looked it over?”
When you went through her things. The words hung unspoken between them.
She hadn’t felt strong enough to sort through Chloe and Jack’s belongings. She knew she needed to decide what to give away, what to toss, and what to pack up to for Ella, but she couldn’t bring herself to start. All she’d managed was to carve out studio space in Chloe’s office. “I found a three a three ring binder with her recipes, but I haven’t gone through the computer files.” With her sister’s penchant for organization, she probably had checklists for everything from arrival to checkout. Locating those would make her job easier. “I’ll see what I can find. Chloe once said she jotted down notes about every guest who stayed at the inn, including what she served them for breakfast. Do you know she never wanted to serve anyone the same dish twice?”
“She made everyone’s experience special.”
Which meant that was what returning guests would expect. Daunting, but doable, Cassie told herself. She was smart and could learn anything she put her mind to.
“You’ll also do the wishing well tours,” Ty continued.
The man was in full business mode now. She could almost see the gears turning in his head as he planned out a course of action for their working relationship.
“Have you talked with MaryAnn or checked out any of the local stories about people who swear their wishes have come true?”
She couldn’t miss the contempt that crept into his voice. He hadn’t sounded that way when they’d visited the well. “You don’t believe in the legend?”
Ty picked a blade of grass and twisted it between his long fingers. “I believe hard work and planning make things happen, not tossing a coin into a wishing well.” When he paused and smiled, her heart fluttered. “That said, I also believe anything that brings tourists and their money to town is a good thing.”
“With a cynical attitude like that it’s a good thing you don’t do the well tours.” Cassie stared out at the glassy water, wishing she felt the same calm. “Maybe it’s because the legend started with sisters, but I like to think good things do happen when we make a wish for someone we love.”
Ty tossed the grass aside. “Don’t tell me. You’re one of those sending good energy into the universe can change the world people.”
The sarcastic bite to his words made her turn toward him. No matter how bad things appeared she’d never heard that hard an edge, that bitterness in his voice before. “What’s wrong with positive thinking and being nice to people?”
“Nothing. Just don’t count on it getting you anywhere.” He tossed aside the grass. “There’s a couple from Dallas who every year since the inn opened stay on their anniversary. They haven’t let me reschedule them anywhere else. I’ll let them know they can come this weekend.” He pointed toward a two story Victorian style house on the opposite side of the lake. “I don’t know much about running the inn, but talk to Betty and Gloria if you have questions. Their place was the first bed and breakfasts to open in town. From what they say, organization is the key.”
Organization. Planning. Cooking. Sticking to a schedule. Abilities her sister possessed in abundance. Combine those with Chloe’s hostess personality, a degree in hotel management, and hospitality and the Bluebonnet Inn had been a labor of love rather than a job.
Cassie, on the other hand, possessed the culinary skills of a five-year-old, which meant peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and on a good day boxed mac and cheese. Not exactly what paying guests expected.
“There’s so much to learn. I’ve been taking care of myself since I was in college, but suddenly I feel like I’m a little kid playing dress up.”
“You’ve had to retool your life. That’s never easy.”
What Aubrey told her popped into Cassie’s head. Our grandfather asked Ty to take over running the Bar 7. Ty being the ever dutiful grandson quit his job in Dallas and moved back. “You’ve had to make adjustments, too.” Before a
nd again now.
He shrugged. “You’ve got the hard part dealing with Ella’s school, homework, meals, and all the decisions that go along with those things. How’s Ella doing in school, by the way?”
The days I get her to there her teacher says she sits in the corner refusing to do much of anything, and this morning the principal threatened me with truancy court, but other than that things are great. Thanks for asking.
All the morning’s emotions, her doubts, her insecurities, her fear of messing things up so bad Ella spent the majority of her adult life on a psychiatrist’s couch, trying to undo the psychological damage, crashed down on Cassie. Nothing she’d ever do was as important as raising Ella, and yet, never in her life had she felt so unprepared for a task.
Tears stung Cassie’s eyes, but she blinked them away, forcing down her emotions. She would hold it together in front of this man. She clenched her fists so tight her nails dug into her palms. “Of course, some days are tough. We’re still settling in, but we’ll get there. Every day we make a more progress adjusting to our new roles.”
Stop while you’re ahead, or at least not behind. Otherwise he’ll know something’s wrong. Yes, he’s a man, but he’s not an idiot.
She bit her lip to keep from saying anything else, but then made the mistake of looking into Ty’s hawk-like gaze. He sees right through me. He knows I’m lying and doing a poor job of that, too.
Feeling a desperate need to convince him, to keep him from seeing her insecurity, she added, “It’s just taking time and patience.” Her favorite two words.
His gaze narrowed. “You sure everything’s okay?”
“Of course I’m fine. That’s what I said. What makes you ask that?”
“Anyone who tries that hard to convince me of something is trying to put lipstick on a pig.” His gaze pinned her as if she were a bug on a child’s school project. “Is it school? Aubrey had a rough time with it after her father died. Is Ella having trouble?”
Cassie sat there alternating between wonder and frustration at Ty’s uncanny ability to zero in on the real issue. Did he do that with everyone, or just her? Not that it mattered, but blast him for the skill. Weren’t men supposed to be clueless about emotional things like this?
