by Autumn Reed
After placing the small and big blinds, Knox dealt the cards around the table. His movements were swift and professional. With two hole cards each, the flop was dealt, revealing three of the community cards.
There was another round of betting followed by Knox dealing the turn; then another round of betting followed by the river. Finally, the last round of betting was capped off with the showdown. Some rounds went more quickly than others, ending before the showdown could be dealt.
I was mostly silent, watching, determined to pick up the game quickly. The guys occasionally offered me pointers but generally let me figure it out on my own. They were competitive but encouraging. Slowly, I grew more comfortable with the mechanics of the game and began to relax. Although I was enjoying the game, I was most entertained watching the guys.
Gathered around the table, any thoughts of their jobs or the hierarchy within the group melted away. The room felt cozy and the atmosphere was one of friendly camaraderie. They seemed closer than I imagined was typical for co-workers; not that I knew what normal co-workers, or people, were really like. I wondered how much time they actually spent together.
All three seemed well-practiced in the art of poker, yet I was most in awe of Knox. Knox was clearly in his element, completely cool and relaxed. It was obvious that he was the superior player. He never gave anything away, his poker face masking all of his thoughts and reactions.
Chase took the game very seriously, a trait I’d also noticed during Monopoly. His deliberations were often so long that Ethan would start humming the Jeopardy! tune, or Knox would kick him under the table, urging him to get on with it.
Ethan, on the other hand, didn’t take any of it too seriously. I could tell that while he was probably just as competitive as the other guys, he was really just playing for the fun of it. Every so often, I saw him snitch another piece of candy and laughed to myself. It was a good thing he won his fair share of hands, or he would have been out of the game several hands ago.
“So, I have a serious question for you guys.” I kept my face completely blank while pausing dramatically. Their expressions turned serious, expecting another conversation about my dad or their backgrounds, I was sure. “Which one of you is responsible for the apple-scented body wash in the shower?” I smiled at the end of the question, unable to hide my amusement any longer.
Chase snickered and Knox guffawed, both turning to look at Ethan. He glared at them. “What? I happen to like the smell of fruit. It’s not a crime.”
I let out an involuntary giggle, and all three guys immediately turned to stare. Ethan commented, his tone mocking, “Well, look at that. Buffy here not only takes down creatures of the night, she also giggles.”
My confusion apparent, Ethan sighed. “Please tell me that you’ve seen Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Television series about a beautiful, kick-ass teenage girl who single-handedly takes down vampires and demons?” Did he just imply that he thinks I’m beautiful? Forcing myself to focus, I shook my head at his question. He continued, disgusted. “This is a disaster of epic proportions. We seriously need to hook you up with a Netflix subscription.”
Knox interrupted, his voice a low growl. “Excuse me; did you really just compare me to vampires and demons?”
Ethan smirked. “If the boot fits . . . ”
As their bantering continued, Chase looked over at me and smiled. Clearly he was used to their behavior. And for the second time that day, I felt a prickle of jealousy. I could see myself being friends with these guys, hanging out and playing games, watching movies. But, I also knew it would never happen. It was strange; they were sitting right in front of me, but I already missed them.
One hand was going particularly well, and it was down to Ethan and me for the showdown. I won the hand with a full house and Knox rewarded me with a smile that stretched to his eyes. I felt warmed to the core and smiled in return.
Ethan looked at me, squinting slightly and cocking his head to the side. His tone was serious. “Are you sure you’ve never played poker before?”
I grinned. “Positive. Although I have watched The Sting about a million times.”
Knox’s eyebrows raised in response. “Wait. You’ve seen, and like, The Sting?”
I scrunched up my nose and forehead. “Um, yeah. Who doesn’t like Robert Redford and Paul Newman?”
The three of them sat motionless, staring at me. Knox broke the silence. “I can’t wait ’til Jackson hears this. He’s always talking about that movie and how Uncle reminds him of Shaw.”
I looked from face to face wondering who Jackson and Uncle were. I remembered Knox mentioned he had a younger brother; maybe they had an uncle too? “Knox, is Jackson the younger brother you mentioned?”
They all started laughing, and I felt like the odd one out, wondering if I had missed the punch line. Knox responded. “No, we’re not related. But Jax is like a brother to me. And he’s a member of our team.”
There were more of them? Hopefully they were in Santa Cruz and would stay there. I didn't know if I could handle one more attractive guy in my life.
As the game progressed, it was easier to see when I should bet and when I should fold. Since I had a weak poker face, I focused on my cards and the odds. I enjoyed the game, the strategy and the luck. I liked being with them, feeling like I belonged even if only for the moment.
I had a hard time thinking that any of them wanted to harm me or my Dad. If anything, hadn’t they shown over and over that they were trying to help?
A little voice in the back of my head spoke up. You don’t know who their client is. You don’t know what their motives are.
Maybe not, but I knew that they had rescued me from the fire, even if their appearance there wasn’t accidental. I knew that they had looked out for me, taken care of my injuries, fed me, and even entertained me. And deep down, I believed that they couldn’t be bad.
Knox yawned and stretched his arms behind his head; we had been playing for a while and it was getting late. My eyelids felt heavy; I was drowsy and about ready to call it a night. Chase shifted in his chair, stretching muscles stiff from sitting so long.
I glanced around the table, sizing up the competition. Ethan’s chips were dwindling due to consumption, and he decided to “cash in” by eating the remaining ones. Chase and I had held our own and had about the same amount of chips remaining. Knox was clearly in the lead.
The first three cards were dealt. My hand looked promising, but I couldn’t tell for sure. After another round of betting, the turn card was dealt and Chase folded.
With a ten of hearts, queen of clubs, six of hearts, and ace of spades on the table, I was trying not to get too excited. I struggled to still my nerves and keep my face straight. It was down to Knox and me, and it was my turn to bet.
Glancing again at my cards, I checked my hand for what felt like the hundredth time. I was holding an eight and nine of hearts. If only the river would reveal a seven of hearts, then I would have a straight flush. As far as I remembered, the only hands that could beat a straight flush were one of a higher sequence of cards or a royal flush.
Heart pounding, I wet my lips. Looking down at my chocolate “chips,” I thought, Maybe now’s the time to go all in.
Hesitant yet excited, I pushed all of my chips toward the pot, their bright metallic surfaces gleaming as the eggs rolled across the table. I saw the guys perk up, even Knox. I grinned, secretly delighting in their reaction. I held my breath as I waited for the last card to be dealt. Let the chips fall where they may.
Between Two Worlds
I smashed a pillow to my face, wanting to scream in frustration. While the poker game was winding down, I’d barely been able to keep my eyes open, certain that I would fall asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. But somehow by the time I got settled in bed, I found myself wide awake.
It must have been only an hour or so later but felt more like an eternity. Once again, I was unable to shut down the scattered thoughts running laps around my mind. I s
houldn’t have been surprised. The events of the last few days crashed into my life like a tsunami, leaving devastation I never could have imagined.
All things considered, I was thankful to the guys for providing a distraction from the chaos. While I was busy focusing on whether I could trust them, I wasn’t thinking about what I’d found out about my past or what I was going to do about my future. Of course, it didn’t hurt that the distraction came in the form of three captivating males.
But awake in the stillness of night, I could no longer rely on those distractions. I lay in bed staring at the ceiling and listening to the sounds of the cabin. Through the thin walls, I heard the gentle creaking of the springs of the sofa bed and the occasional groan of the wood floor. Beyond the walls, the chirp of crickets was punctuated every so often by the hoot of an owl. Normally, sounds like these would have soothed me; tonight they just irritated me, reminding me that I was awake.
Moonlight filtered through the open window, casting a spotlight on the foot of the bed. Shifting positions, I got a whiff of the sheets. Closing my eyes, I tried to imagine myself in my bed at home, longing to smell the familiar scents. I pulled the covers up around me, seeking solace that blankets alone couldn’t provide. Would anything ever feel like home again? So far from everything I knew, I ached for something familiar.
Unable to relax my body or still my mind, I thrashed in the sheets. The only home I had really ever known was gone. The bookshelf of novels I had read, the guitar I spent so many hours playing, the cups we drank out of, the blankets I snuggled up under. All gone.
It wasn’t even that I missed the things so much as the memories associated with them. They came together to create a feeling of home, a sense of belonging and safety. I felt like the rug had been ripped out from under me.
I got a glimpse of trees swaying outside the window and longed for open spaces surrounded by mountains, the sky a blanket of stars. If it wasn’t for my injured ankle, I would have snuck outside to see the stars, even if I had to climb a tree to do so. I needed the feeling of normalcy the night sky provided; I needed that connection to my mom as always, but even more so now that my dad and I were separated.
As I lay there, my thoughts flitted through my mind like small birds darting through the trees, quickly moving from one subject to the next without lingering. Agitated, I threw back the covers and jerked onto my side, clumsily twisting my ankle in the process. “Eek!” The loud sound tumbled out of my mouth before I could suppress it. I waited silently, hoping that none of the guys would come to investigate.
Apparently that was too much to ask for, because a minute later, I heard the soft sounds of the door opening and closing. I didn’t bother turning around to find out who it was, feigning sleep instead.
I heard the smooth timbre of Ethan’s voice as the other side of the bed dipped from his weight. “I know you’re awake. Not trying to make another run for it, are you?” His tone was wry, a quality that I had already come to appreciate as distinctly Ethan.
I let out an inelegant snort in response to his question but refrained from saying anything else. I didn’t feel like explaining my turbulent thoughts and emotions.
“Do you need anything?” For once, his voice was serious enough that I could tell he was concerned.
“Nothing is really wrong. I just can’t sleep.” I kept my reply brief, hoping he would get the message and let me get back to wallowing in peace. “You can go back to bed. I’ll be fine.”
Ethan chuckled. “Considering tonight’s bed is the not-so-comfortable chair in the living room, I’m happy to stay here and help.”
He was sleeping in the chair? Obviously it should have occurred to me earlier that there was only one pull-out couch and three guys. Now I really felt guilty for hogging the bedroom. “I’m sorry,” I started, but Ethan interrupted.
“Hey now, none of that. I was just pointing out that if you want to talk, I’d be more than happy to stay with you for a little while.”
Although I should have told him to go, I found myself giving in. The sound of his deep voice was already soothing me. I turned onto my back and glanced at him in the low light. He was facing me with his knee folded on the bed and his other leg settled on the floor. His palm pressed into the mattress, supporting his weight, while the other was draped across his lap. I couldn’t make out the expression on his face, seeing only a slight reflection from his glasses.
I fumbled with the covers, pulling them back over my body, mostly in an attempt to stall having to talk to him. It’s not that I was uncomfortable talking to Ethan; I just wasn’t used to sharing my feelings, especially in such intimate surroundings.
“I think it’s finally sinking in that I don’t have a home to go back to. I’ve led such a solitary life for so many years, all I’ve really known is that house, the land around it, and my dad.” The words just seemed to tumble out, exposing too much. “Usually when I’m feeling down or am having trouble sleeping, I sneak outside and stargaze.” I sighed, “And now I don’t even have that.”
He quickly replied, “You will; your ankle will heal, and you won’t be stuck in this cabin forever.” He continued, his voice warmer than I’d ever heard it. “Haley, I know it’s hard to imagine, but your perspective will change over time. Home is not just a house or even a family. Sometimes it’s finding a group of friends that will always have your back or even a career that provides new meaning to your life. Your home as you’ve known it may be gone, but you will find your place.”
He quieted, letting his words sink in. “Your love of stargazing . . . tell me about it.”
I couldn’t explain the feeling, but I suddenly wanted Ethan to understand. “I’ve always loved searching for the constellations. They remind me of my mom. One of the few memories I have of her was our secret stargazing.
I remember one night she came into my room after I had gone to bed but long before sunrise. My mom kissed me on the forehead, and I was comforted by the scent of her floral perfume. After gently pressing her fingers to my lips to keep me from waking my dad, we snuck away from the house with a telescope. As she pointed out the constellations, she whispered their names; the myths associated with them were my favorite bedtime stories.”
Ethan slowly moved onto the bed and lay down on his side, his head propped on his hand. “Will you share one of those stories with me?”
I replied, “You really want me to?” He nodded, his hand still cupping his cheek.
I pursed my lips. “Hmmm, that’s a tough choice. I think the myth associated with the Virgo constellation has always been one of my favorites. Plus, Virgo is easy to spot; it’s the second largest constellation after Hydra.”
Ethan grinned. “Perfect. Why don’t you tell me that one?”
I sighed, debating where to begin. “Well, as you probably know, myths are often based on oral tradition handed down from generation to generation. They mutate over time, sometimes leading to conflicting versions. There are even several different myths associated with the Virgo constellation. That said, I will tell you my favorite version, the version my mom always told me.”
I inhaled deeply, drawing breath to tell the tale.
“The Grecians worshipped many gods, loving and fearing them in equal measure. Most gods lived on Mount Olympus, a place of great beauty and good weather. Several gods dwelled elsewhere, presiding over their own domain; Poseidon lived in the sea, and Hades was lord of the Underworld.
The Underworld was not a place you would want to visit; filled with darkness and the dead, it was a place of no return. As lord of the dark Underworld, Hades was feared as a god of terror and death. Not surprisingly, he didn’t have many worshippers or temples.”
Ethan snickered, and I continued.
“Demeter was the goddess of the earth, responsible for agriculture and crops. The people of Greece prayed to her, asking for fertile lands and abundant harvests. Demeter had a brother named Zeus, god of the sky and lightning, among other things. Together, they had a daughter named
Persephone.”
I felt my cheeks warm as I wondered what Ethan thought of this unorthodox relationship. Not wanting to draw attention to it, I continued.
“Persephone was full of life and Demeter loved the child more than anything else. Persephone loved to wander the fields and meadows, often picking wildflowers. Over the years, she grew into a beautiful maiden. Hades was struck by her beauty and fell in love at first sight.
At the time, it was common for fathers to arrange the marriage of their daughter. One day, Hades asked Zeus for Persephone’s hand in marriage. Zeus had quite the dilemma. Hades was a good match for Persephone. But, their marriage would separate Demeter and Persephone forever; Demeter as goddess of the earth could not live in the Underworld, and Persephone as queen of the Underworld would be required to remain there.
Zeus knew that if he refused, Hades, his eldest brother, would be offended. If he consented, Demeter would never forgive him. Choosing his words very carefully, Zeus told Hades that he would neither give nor withhold his consent. Although Hades wished for Zeus’s blessing on the marriage, he read between the lines. Seeing the answer as encouragement, he returned to the Underworld determined to have Persephone as his bride.”
Ethan rose up slightly, creating space between his head and the hand that had been supporting it. With the other hand, he removed his glasses. He placed them on the nightstand before returning to his side and laying his head on the pillow.
“One day when Persephone was gathering flowers in the fields, she wandered away from her friends without realizing it. She noticed a beautiful narcissus and knelt down to pick it. Struggling to pull it from the ground, she tugged with all her strength. Suddenly, a giant hole opened in the earth and out sprung a chariot driven by Hades, drawn by steeds as black as night. Hades grabbed the frightened girl and whisked her away to the Underworld; Persephone wept and refused to eat or drink anything.
When Persephone didn’t return that afternoon, her friends were worried. No one could tell where Persephone had gone. Demeter was distraught and wandered the earth searching for her. In vain, Demeter asked both gods and mortals what had happened to Persephone.
